Ask a Janitor Anything: The Sequel - General

Not a question but rather a request. They both have quest in them so there. So anyways I forget what those things that janitors wheel around. around here they're yellow, dirty, and full of water and like of like a bucket ontop of another bucket anyways. Have you ever rode one of those down a hallway [editline]21st April 2011[/editline] Also Have you ever had a moment where you wanted to tell facepunch about it?

Has a student who looked like a total hardass ever opened up to you later or something of the sort?

Q: have you ever cleaned up any poop that wasn't brown? A: Yes. i forgot to ask what colour :(

[QUOTE=HendoV2;29344968]Q: have you ever cleaned up any poop that wasn't brown? A: Yes. i forgot to ask what colour :([/QUOTE] Red, black or white probably.

What did the kid say after you told him you were going to fuck his mother?

Have you ever seen any crazy shit colors, like pink or blue?

Ever stolen anything from work?

Q: What's the funniest graffiti you've cleaned up?

Has anyone ever taken a dump in the SINK?

Have you ever pulled pranks on people who annoyed you at work? Obviously not by fucking their mum but actual tricks to make a show of them.

Q: What's your favorite drink?

[QUOTE=Dryvnt;29344114]Have you played Portal 2? If yes, how did the mess at the start of the game make you feel?[/QUOTE] He's a janitor not a gardener When trees begin growing inside he steps back

[QUOTE=Zeke129;29346503]He's a janitor not a gardener When trees begin growing inside he steps back[/QUOTE] I was friends with the gardener at my primary school. The school was built over an old nun convent, and one time he showed me a bomb shelter that was hidden under a stairwell that he turned into a storage shed. It had little wooden crosses and statues of Jesus all over the walls. Anyway, my janitor related questions are: Q: What is your favorite and least favorite thing to clean up? and Q:Do you think you get suitable pay for what you do?

[QUOTE=GhostxNote;29335775] I was walking down the halls about to go to lunch until suddenly I felt a fucking slime ball roll down my face. I looked up very fast and saw who it was. I ran up the stairs and managed to get a hold of him. I sent him to the office. For some reason he got away with just a Saturday school for 5 hours. I was unsatisfied by his punishment so I went to his house and had a little chat with his mother. I told her that I was very upset with her son. She apologized and we began to chat casually. She was recently divorced so I knew this would be easy. I asked her if she would like to have dinner with me that night to discuss the situation at school and possible problems with her son. We went out to dinner and things hit off very well. Made out with her in my car and I drove her home. She invited me inside to stay and this is when I knew I had won. I walked inside and there was my little rascal, playing COD on Xbox 360. She went upstairs and I told her I would be right up. The kid finally realized I was in the house. "What are you doing here!?" "I'm here to fuck your mom, dude."[/QUOTE] Oh god I can't breathe :v: Janitor of the year, every year.

Q: Any of the African American hoopers at your school get friendly with you so you'd open up the gym for them out of school hours

So you are a janitor, who goes to MIT, so therefore I assume you are smart.... Janitor who goes to MIT.... Q: Are you Will Hunting?

What are your fetishes?

What time zone are you in? What games to play on steam?

Q: have you ever stolen somthing from where you work or taken somthing that you should not have taken? A: Sticky notes, and a teachers stapler. Q: What is the worst mess you've left in a toilet before you became a janitor? A: Probably explosive diahria Q: do the people at tell you all kinds of inside stuff A: Nope, they dont say a word. Q. Do you use AMD or intel? A: I use AMD and ATI. I fit rather nicly here :) Q: Since being a janitor, do you take extra care when in pissing/shitting in public places? A: Yes, I take about half the time afterwards to clean up after myself. Q: So you still have the tech job at the high school or do you have the tech job somewhere else? A: At the high school. Q: Have you ever seen a perfectly dog shaped poo in a bathroom? A: Yes. It was mine. Q: have you ever said "i am the LAW" before you wiped up a puddle of piss or something? A: Can't say that I have, but I will make an effort to say it next time. Thank you. Q: Are there any casual fridays or any of those type of events at the AMD facility? A: No, its pretty stale there. Q: Ever seen a blue piece of shit? Like fucking summer-sky blue? A: Not blue, but I have seen black, green, yellow, brown, bloody, and nutty. Q: Have you ever had a situation where there was shit smeared on the walls? A: Yes, many times. Fucking track team. Q: Are there anyone at AMD who acts or resembles Milton (the red stapler guy) from Office Space? A: Actually yes, Its one of the main dev in the ATI section. He's a very smart dude. Q: Have you ever built something in your spare time? Such as a funny little contraption like Knife-wrench or Fork-drill? A: We had a mice infestation at the school one year. No matter how many times the exterminater came, there was always one mouse that always got away. Well I attached a metal pin to my mop and put a couple slices of cheese on top of it. The mouse went for it and I led it outside. I gave it a pet to thank him for his co-operation. Q: If someone wanted to write a book/script based on these Q&A's what would you say? A: I would be flatterd. I would have no problem with that. Q: And why A: Its a tier 1 janitorial job. It would test out my skills and hopefully help me attain the ability to mop around a level 6 clearence secuirty floor with my eyes closed. And the fact that if someone asks me where I work I could put on my black shades while enouncing in a official voice, "That information is classified." Q: Could you post some pictures from your amazing adventures? I don't expect you to document every day of your life, but sort of a "One day as a janitor" type of thing. A: I'll take a couple pictures. It wont be much since its illigal to photograph within the facility. Q: Have you found anyone browsing facepunch at AMD or the school yet A: Nope. Q: What did the kid say after you told him you were going to fuck his mother? A: I think he stormed into his room and cryed. Q: Has a student who looked like a total hardass ever opened up to you later or something of the sort? A: I have a story that relates to this question. There was this kid who always loved to pinch girls asses. He would do it to every single girl he would pass. If they yelled at him, he would act like it wasnt a big deal and yell at them (the girls) worse. One day he pinched a girls ass and her boyfriend happened to be there. The boyfriend pinned him up against a locker and punched him in the gut pretty hard. I tossed the boyfriend off of him. The boyfriend was a big dude. He came charging back but I just grabbed him by the shoulders and told him to stop before I did something that could get myself fired and him without his football scholorship. Anyways, he stormed off. The kid shrugged it off like it was no big deal but I told him to come to my office. Apparently he had been having some family issues. Mom does drugs, no dad, etc etc. He opened up to me very quickly. We played a couple rounds of CS 1.6 and he turned around. No more ass pinching and he got a girlfriend 2 weeks later. That boyfriend never missed with him again either. Q: What's your favorite drink? A: Hot Beverage: Green Tea, Hazelnut Coffee Cold Beverage: Ice Water, Cream Soda Q: What is your favorite and least favorite thing to clean up? A: Probably carpet pee. That shit is so hard to get out. Even if you get all the pee out of the carpet, the musk is there all day. Q:Do you think you get suitable pay for what you do? A: I am satisfied with what they pay me. Q: Any of the African American hoopers at your school get friendly with you so you'd open up the gym for them out of school hours A: Only 2 black kids in the entire school. Never got to talk to them. I have played basketball with some kids after school. Q: Are you Will Hunting? A: MATT DAEIMON Q: What are your fetishes? A: They call me the Ass Master for a reason. Q: What time zone are you in? What games to play on steam? A: STALKER, Garrys Mod, CS 1.6, CS Source and DOD Source.

[QUOTE=GhostxNote;29335565]Q: Have you ever fucked a student A: Yes, but not in the one I work at.[/QUOTE] Q : is there a story behind this?

Did you feel remorse after fucking that one student's mother?

That was a nice thing you did for that kid who pinched girls' asses.

Q: You seem to get laid a lot by a lot of different women very easily. Can you share your incredible pimpin' janitor secrets?

Q: Did you have to sign an NDA with AMD before starting work?

Did you ever do something in high school that would totally piss you off as a janitor now? Like, shit in the urinal or something?

Q: Ever walked into a room or the bathroom whilst the occupants were having sex?

[QUOTE=jetboy;29348537]Q: Did you have to sign an NDA with AMD before starting work?[/QUOTE] yes. he said that

Wow, Janitors even flirt in a janitor way. "Hey baby, what toilet scents you usin'?" :shlick:

I remember browsing these threads from '09. Welcome back! Q: Just how many mothers have you fucked, you dirty mother fucker you?

I'm not sure if this has been asked or not, but can you post a picture of yourself? I have all these images of this heroic janitor doing all those things and I would appreciate a face to attribute to them.