It's called a camera, use it.
It might make your shitty story mildly entertaining.
raise the flames, and make the squirrel shoot out like a rocket :smug:
1. Get some fireworks and rope
2. Get the squirrel to cooperate
3. Tie the squirrel to fireworks and point them up
4. Launch
5. Profit?
It'll be dead by tomorrow then you'll know you willingly killed a little animal just because you were afraid of some black marks.
Jesus, grow some balls.
Ok, something on this thread is making a pop up... pop up asking me to login to [url]www.showyourdick.org[/url]
What the fuck guys
[QUOTE=DeanWinchester;25528923]Ok, something on this thread is making a pop up... pop up asking me to login to [URL="http://www.showyourdick.org"]www.showyourdick.org[/URL]
What the fuck guys[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=RepublcanTheist;25525253]Except that's sadistic.
[img_thumb]http://w ww.showyourdick .org/image/6 sx9okgarm8_- 1382129 597.jpg[img_thumb][/QUOTE]
Hurray for ad block plus.
Jerk it down the fire shaft ;)
OK so I woke up late this morning. I totally forgot about the squirrel, and won't be back home until around 7. I hope it doesn't die.
[QUOTE=collegegrad;25529098]OK so I woke up late this morning. I totally forgot about the squirrel, and won't be back home until around 7. I hope it doesn't die.[/QUOTE]
It will die eventually, such is the concept of life.
Squirrels can't get rabies.
What the hell is this "showyourdick.org" -login that comes when I enter this page?
And OP, put a box with food in front of the fireplace, make it cover the whole hole if you can. Then trap the squirrel inside it and carry it out and set it free.
I had a family of raccoons living in my chimney before. At night all I heard was scratching between the walls so we called someone and they pulled out about 3-4 raccoons.
So you won't release it until 7? It's going to die. If you say there is soot and stuff, the squirrel is probably breathing that shit, eating it and scratching at it. I hope you like to clean up dead bodies cause you deserve it instead of letting it go as soon as it got caught in the chimney.
from outside throw a rope from the ground into the chimney or something
[QUOTE=Sykez;25529575]So you won't release it until 7? It's going to die. If you say there is soot and stuff, the squirrel is probably breathing that shit, eating it and scratching at it. I hope you like to clean up dead bodies cause you deserve it instead of letting it go as soon as it got caught in the chimney.[/QUOTE]
I work with hospice patients all the time at work. I clean shit off of deceased patients at least 3 times a day, and then wrap them and take them to the morgue.
Fucking open the vent you dick :colbert:
Put shredder under there, open hatch.
Real pics or it MSDidn't happen.
Get a squirrel cage.
Open chimney while cage door is open.
Close door when squirrel is inside.
Take cage outside.
Open cage quickly.
Put on glove to take squirrel.
Put near tree.
Done.
You're a coward, aren't you?
[QUOTE=MagicBurrito;25522518]is the fire department free?[/QUOTE]
No, it's $75, and if you don't pay it, they watch your house burn down.
I just called my dad. He said that he tried opening the vent this morning, but the squirrel didn't fall into the fireplace. He thinks it's still alive, but stuck somewhere.
[QUOTE=collegegrad;25530004]I just called my dad. He said that he tried opening the vent this morning, but the squirrel didn't fall into the fireplace. He thinks it's still alive, but stuck somewhere.[/QUOTE]
Chimneys usually have a bend in them so things like rain don't come down the chimney. This is my theory:
[img]http://www.cubeupload.com/files/8c864bdeathheap.png[/img]
OP is probably lying.
No normal person wouldn't let a trapped squirrel out of their fireplace so it wouldn't die a painful and slow death because "It might track soot on my carpet"
Or at least call the fucking animal services.
We actually had a crow in our chimney, it was stuck because it isn't that wide. We got it out eventually :).
It's a fucking squirrel guys. I used to kill them for fun.
Op, think about it. If it dies, you get a terrible smell by your fireplace while it decays. You will have flies and maggots out the asshole near the squirrel and then they will crawl all over your new carpet and shit on your carpet. WHO'S DIRTY NOW!!!
[QUOTE=TailsPrower;25530460]It's a fucking squirrel guys. I used to kill them for fun.[/QUOTE]
But Facepunch loves adorable animals. Fluffy animals, no matter how boring and insignificant they may be, are to be treated with honour and respect. If there was any justice in the world, the team who helped rescue the Chilean miners would be at the OP's house right now saving that squirrel. But fuck, people just don't care like they used to.
PS can I have your autograph for when you become a famous serial killer?
[QUOTE=Jobby;25530615]But Facepunch loves adorable animals. Fluffy animals, no matter how boring and insignificant they may be, are to be treated with honour and respect. If there was any justice in the world, the team who helped rescue the Chilean miners would be at the OP's house right now saving that squirrel. But fuck, people just don't care like they used to.
PS can I have your autograph for when you become a famous serial killer?[/QUOTE]They are pests that can cause pretty serious damage to a house.
Sure why not.
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