[QUOTE=joshdasmif;38682267]pretty sure all ive done is compliment her, how do you usually cheer up a PMS'ing gf?[/QUOTE]
Apparently just chilling out and being patient is the best course of action says internet.
well okay, ill wait until she's watched her movie
dunno about crazy pmsing girls, but when my bf's down:
"do you want to talk about anything"
if no: "is there anything i can do"
if no: "well if you need anything i'm here"
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;38682605]dunno about crazy pmsing girls, but when my bf's down:
"do you want to talk about anything"
if no: "is there anything i can do"
if no: "well if you need anything i'm here"[/QUOTE]
That's basically what I do if there ever is a problem.
[QUOTE=joshdasmif;38681907]girlfriend lying in a mood at the opposite end of the bed cause I was playing empire total war i think, turned off my laptop and cuddled into her asking what was wrong and she just said "nothin" in a crappy way. asked her 10 minutes later (still hugging her, she hadn't moved) and she said in an annoyed way "NOTHING." she isn't usually this quiet but i tried helping her and nothing worked what should i do?
Also she doesn't get periods, something to do with the implant i think[/QUOTE]
You have a girlfriend but still don't understand a thing about women, do you?
And assuming it's her period? What a charming excuse! Always assume it's her period. That way you don't have to worry or take responsibility about a thing and can get back to videogames in no time.
Useful advice, mate.
When a girl says NOTHING it means the contrary. She means she misses you and wants you to actually and genuinely pay attention to her instead of trying to remedy her "moody" with emergency cuddling. That's nothing.
jeez, get your lazy butt out of your couch and go do something useful and constructive with that girl. She obviously misses you and you're just not there the way she needs.
That's the meaning of "nothing".
I hope you learned something.
To give the guy credit where it's due, he did say he'd been doing things with her, and was only taking the time off then to play games seeing as he'd been devoting a bit of time to her (cooking for her, hanging out, all the other stuff he said). As far as I can tell, she's been round his house for a solid six days?
So I don't think it's as simple as "She wants you and you're not there for her", because he has been there for her early on and just took time out for himself. Unless he did a real shitty job earlier :v:
To be honest, if I were in your shoes, and my girlfriend was over, I wouldn't be playing Total War haha, I'd be chatting with her or watching TV or going to the movies. Then at night, when you've spent all day together, that's the time I'd take for myself to just do whatever (games, TV shows on the laptop, reading).
No advice here. Just wanted to say I spent the weekend at my girlfriend's place. Shit was was fun.
If your going to game while your gf is there I recommend involving her in it on way or another. Try to get her to play simple games for amusement or ask her if she wants to watch or something, if your playing any sort of game that isn't super linear get her to make choices on which way you should go or what to do etc. Don't just ignore her over on the other side of the bed you know?
.
i dunno about you but if i just played singleplayer games every time i had a friend over i wouldn't have any friends
what do you think is so different about your girlfriend?
[QUOTE=E1025;38612426]You guys are missing out holister / superdry + skinny jeans = instant babe magnet[/QUOTE]
Enjoy being a walking advertisement. Save up and buy some decent brands.
My ex was fine with me sitting my arse down and playing on the xbox at the end of the day, but only if we'd spent the entire day together and had done a bunch of stuff. She wasn't so crazy as to want me devoting my entire time to her. We'd both take the time to do our own thing (for example, we'd both sit down and read our own books, or she'd be on her phone or watching tv, or vice versa). josh's girlfriend has been round his place for 6 days straight, I think that warrants him having his own time to do whatever he wants.
But there's probably an underlying problem that he's failing to pick up on, hence why his girlfriend is acting a bit angry and upset. Try taking her out somewhere, because you said you've been drinking and smoking weed. After 6 days, no doubt it's getting boring as hell.
[QUOTE=joshdasmif;38682267]pretty sure all ive done is compliment her, how do you usually cheer up a PMS'ing gf?[/QUOTE]
I've personally found that a movie and Chinese food works quite well.
Also you now agree with everything she say's for the next three to four days.
[editline]3rd December 2012[/editline]
I've also heard that the implant can cause some foul moods.
Batten down the hatches brother, it's going to be a rough one.
So my serious partner of nearly 2 years told me she was asexual recently.
As an extremely sexual person I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Really not sure where to go from here
asexual just means they don't have a mojo, they don't get horny. they can still enjoy the feeling of sex and can still have sex for the benefit of the other person if they care about them
they just got no sex drive
[editline]3rd December 2012[/editline]
if you have been dating 2 years without having sex then golly gee
[QUOTE=EagleEye;38685900]So my serious partner of nearly 2 years told me she was asexual recently.
As an extremely sexual person I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Really not sure where to go from here[/QUOTE]
well you have two obvious choices
either understand the prospects of being in a relationship where someone is asexual (though that term is heavily misleading), or think about breaking up because you feel you are sexually incompatible.
[QUOTE=Rusty100;38685915]asexual just means they don't have a mojo, they don't get horny. they can still enjoy the feeling of sex and can still have sex for the benefit of the other person if they care about them
they just got no sex drive
[editline]3rd December 2012[/editline]
if you have been dating 2 years without having sex then golly gee[/QUOTE]
We haven't done anything outside of make out sessions. She just told me she has never had a sexual urge in her life, and the thought of sex grosses her out.
She actually came out a month ago, so far I've been pretty supportive, but the more I think about not having sex the more I don't think I can deal with it. What is a relationship without intimacy? I honestly feel like I'm a friend rather than a partner.
The other problem is, I'm really irritated that she is just now telling me about this. First she said that she didn't have a place to do anything, so I fixed that and then she said she never really had any urges to do anything.
and what little intimacy we have is usually shit. its so boring and repetitive it feels more like a job than anything else. Any attempt to spice it up, or get in her pants is immediately rejected. My self esteem is shot all to hell ausgsbfbgnunl i just can't
I mean, romantically I love her, but without that kind of intimacy I'm not sure I can continue to be in a closed relationship with her
For reference I'm 20,she's 19.
[QUOTE=EagleEye;38686000]
For reference I'm 20,she's 19.[/QUOTE]
tbh at this age declaring yourself as fully understanding your sexuality to the point of being able to say you're asexual is totally suspect
she might just not know how to deal with her sexuality, or she might not even be attracted to men. the important part tho is you have to figure out if you're willing to accept that or not.
imo it's totally reasonable to say that sex is an important emotional experience for you and that you can't be in a relationship without it
[QUOTE=EagleEye;38686000]We haven't done anything outside of make out sessions. She just told me she has never had a sexual urge in her life, and the thought of sex grosses her out.
She actually came out a month ago, so far I've been pretty supportive, but the more I think about not having sex the more I don't think I can deal with it. What is a relationship without intimacy? I honestly feel like I'm a friend rather than a partner.
The other problem is, I'm really irritated that she is just now telling me about this. First she said that she didn't have a place to do anything, so I fixed that and then she said she never really had any urges to do anything.
and what little intimacy we have is usually shit. its so boring and repetitive it feels more like a job than anything else. Any attempt to spice it up, or get in her pants is immediately rejected. My self esteem is shot all to hell ausgsbfbgnunl i just can't
I mean, romantically I love her, but without that kind of intimacy I'm not sure I can continue to be in a closed relationship with her
For reference I'm 20,she's 19.[/QUOTE]
For me (and many others) sex is a huge part of a meaningful relationship. It's really up to you and how you feel but I don't think you can have a real relationship without a sexual aspect to it. Sounds slightly shallow but that level of intimacy really is essential for a good relationship. Plus if it's damaging your self-esteem then maybe it's time to re-evaluate.
I'll have to sit her down and have a chat after finals then. I know we'll both be upset. But whatever, its for the best. My self esteem can't handle any more of it.
[QUOTE=EagleEye;38686142]I'll have to sit her down and have a chat after finals then. I know we'll both be upset. But whatever, its for the best. My self esteem can't handle any more of it.[/QUOTE]
Good luck mate, hope it works out for you.
[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;38683318]You have a girlfriend but still don't understand a thing about women, do you?
And assuming it's her period? What a charming excuse! Always assume it's her period. That way you don't have to worry or take responsibility about a thing and can get back to videogames in no time.
Useful advice, mate.
When a girl says NOTHING it means the contrary. She means she misses you and wants you to actually and genuinely pay attention to her instead of trying to remedy her "moody" with emergency cuddling. That's nothing.
jeez, get your lazy butt out of your couch and go do something useful and constructive with that girl. She obviously misses you and you're just not there the way she needs.
That's the meaning of "nothing".
I hope you learned something.[/QUOTE]
I've always wondered about the whole "nothing" thing. Why do they do it? Guys do it too, yeah, but I've heard it a lot more from women. With my girlfriend do our best to not to do that to one another, so we'll actually talk things out instead of leaving the other one wondering what's going on. If it's a time when the other needs space to cool off or something than we let each other know.
I'm going to be asking people about what they think about my situation?
About 2 months ago me and my girlfriend broke up, it was a hard time for both of us she had big exams and I was starting a new job. We had been going out for 6 months before we broke up and the last month it got pretty bitter she thought I was cheating on her and I didn't have time for her.
Then on Saturday (two days ago) she knocked on my door crying saying she wanted me back she was sorry and all that shit, we ended up watching a movie together at mine and ended up getting pretty close. Then I saw her the next say and we just started treating each other like we are going out again. I'm not sure if I should go through with this again, even though the time I was with her before was amazing don't think I could go through another break up.
What are your thoughts, does it ever work out when you go back out with a ex? Love to hear your guys thoughts. Sorry about the paragraph. (and the bad English).
If she really means something to you and when you generally liked the time that you both spent in those 6 months, just try it again. If that girl is dear to you, just go for it. Although be more cautious about things in order to not repeat the same stuff over again.
[QUOTE=Ghost101;38686826]I've always wondered about the whole "nothing" thing. Why do they do it? Guys do it too, yeah, but I've heard it a lot more from women. With my girlfriend do our best to not to do that to one another, so we'll actually talk things out instead of leaving the other one wondering what's going on. If it's a time when the other needs space to cool off or something than we let each other know.[/QUOTE]
Sure guys do it too in other things.
But most of the times it means the other person is frustrated for not being recognized the way they need. Most of the time it means that the other person misses you and is seeking recognition at that time and you do not notice the signs.
Of course you will go out with her, try to remedy everything but that will count on nothing because it's you resorting to a "quick fix" of things instead of noticing the real problem and focusing on her actual needs.
Spending time with the other person means nothing if it does not fulfill her needs.
[QUOTE=junker|154;38687001]If she really means something to you and when you generally liked the time that you both spent in those 6 months, just try it again. If that girl is dear to you, just go for it. Although be more cautious about things in order to not repeat the same stuff over again.[/QUOTE]
Cheers I'll take that on board. Just hope she will sit tight for the next month as I'm doing a lot of business trips to other conunties so I wont have much time for her.
Try not to rush into something at take it easy, hopefully your lack of time won't result in the same kind of arguements and quarrles that you experienced before.
How do you motivate your boyfriend to see you on the weekends? I'm always the one who has to ask if he wants to meet up. He loves to go out to the pub basically every weekend, and I mostly feel like a burden since I'm not yet 18.
Also, how do I make him more... forward in bed. For 15 months now, I've always had to start it because he is shy.
So much frustration.
[QUOTE=Croft;38687749]How do you motivate your boyfriend to see you on the weekends? I'm always the one who has to ask if he wants to meet up. He loves to go out to the pub basically every weekend, and I mostly feel like a burden since I'm not yet 18.
Also, how do I make him more... forward in bed. For 15 months now, I've always had to start it because he is shy.
So much frustration.[/QUOTE]
Maybe it's just because he's shy, but I find the prospect of him seemingly having no self-motivation to meet up with you without being prompted weird.
I dunno, find something other than going to the pub that he really enjoys doing that you can enjoy too and possibly make a regular thing of it? Or just outright tell him that you'd like it if he asked you out more often?
Honestly he just sounds very nervous and possibly lacking in self confidence, and if he's still like that with you after 15 months I feel your going to have to go to some lengths to get him to really relax.
In my opinion one way to work at it might be to really try and get him to relaxed about the sex, work up to it slowly, have a good mood, lead him on but don't fully take the lead, encourage him to. Either it will work and over time he'll learn to lead and be more confident and that will usually follow through into general life, or it won't work and at that point I don't know what to tell you. Maybe he's a sub and he doesn't know it? Or he does.
Bear in mind this is all my opinion and I am in no way an expert on this kinda thing, but I was once a very nervous, shy guy, but my gf led me out of it and really boosted my confidence and that became a self-propelling thing really.
[QUOTE=junker|154;38687411]Try not to rush into something at take it easy, hopefully your lack of time won't result in the same kind of arguements and quarrles that you experienced before.[/QUOTE]
Yeah good advice cheers, I'm just treating it like how we first dated so not going full on straight away.
[QUOTE=Regorc's Chest;38688053]Maybe it's just because he's shy, but I find the prospect of him seemingly having no self-motivation to meet up with you without being prompted weird.
I dunno, find something other than going to the pub that he really enjoys doing that you can enjoy too and possibly make a regular thing of it? Or just outright tell him that you'd like it if he asked you out more often?
Honestly he just sounds very nervous and possibly lacking in self confidence, and if he's still like that with you after 15 months I feel your going to have to go to some lengths to get him to really relax.
In my opinion one way to work at it might be to really try and get him to relaxed about the sex, work up to it slowly, have a good mood, lead him on but don't fully take the lead, encourage him to. Either it will work and over time he'll learn to lead and be more confident and that will usually follow through into general life, or it won't work and at that point I don't know what to tell you. Maybe he's a sub and he doesn't know it? Or he does.
Bear in mind this is all my opinion and I am in no way an expert on this kinda thing, but I was once a very nervous, shy guy, but my gf led me out of it and really boosted my confidence and that became a self-propelling thing really.[/QUOTE]
It's weird that he never asks me if I have time to see him, since he has said that we don't see each other enough. He always talks about how he wants to spend time with me, yet he can't even ask me to come over.
I try all the time. He hardly tries at all.
He still tells me he loves me, is intimate etc when we see each other, so Idoubt anything is wrong in the ''love each other'' department.
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