A Simple Guide to being Alpha - Getting Girls!! - General

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23777909]He gets pussy.....[/QUOTE] He is dumb...

ahaha i love facepunch

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23777842]I pursue the road to Godly Aesthetics and being the ultimate Alpha. Girls are just a by-product of this.[/QUOTE] Arnold Schwarzenegger is the one you wish to become? I'm sorry but he became an actor and I can't think of any other "Alpha males" that have made themselves into something. Actually scratch that, Hugh Hefner is the ultimate alpha male, you aren't him, sorry for ruining your dreams bro.

Op here is how to post a timestamp picture: Get a piece of paper, write today's date on it like this: Year/Month/Day/Hour/Minute

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23777909]He gets pussy.....[/QUOTE] He's also a closet homo.

[QUOTE=Espio;23777546]I am in love with the thickness of your hair.. Oh wow look i just started a conversation by saying something nice and [i]WITHOUT BEING A DICK![/i] :bravo:[/QUOTE] Why thank you my good sir.

How many death wishes I have for internet tough guys like you.

[QUOTE=Sethorion;23777939]He's also a closet homo.[/QUOTE] I think he's just incredibly insecure. Constantly beefing himself up in an attempt to escape the ridicule that comes with going to high-school at such a young age. That kind of mentality should wear off soon. It'd make an interesting social experiment to date how long that would take.

He sent me a picture. [QUOTE=Zyzz][URL="http://img256.imageshack.us/i/1280751993139.jpg/"][IMG]http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/6136/1280751993139.jpg[/IMG][/URL] Uploaded with [URL="http://imageshack.us/"]ImageShack.us[/URL][/QUOTE] that is not a Timestamp.

[QUOTE=ZuXer;23777959]He sent me a picture. that is not a Timestamp.[/QUOTE] Wow thanks for sharing that with everyone..... Please edit it.

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23777966]Wow thanks for sharing that with everyone..... Please edit it.[/QUOTE] Your dick? It must be tiny hahaha.

And that, kids, is why you don't take steroids.

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23777966]Wow thanks for sharing that with everyone..... Please edit it.[/QUOTE] Post a timestamp Picture.

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23777869]Wow what a pointless Analogy. Derp Derp I am smarter than all of you because you have muscles so you must be dumb. Please go. I'm trying to help people in this thread. Please accept this and leave.[/QUOTE] NO. "herp derp i have muscles so i get all da gurls! also i am apha whitch is y i get dem all :D" I am 12 stone (british terms bro) my body is probably 20-30% pure fat, I have also had sex well over one and a half thousand times. Try living with the same girl and having sex 5-7 times everyday, have I proved that you don't need to be alpha yet? or do I also need to say that only one girl has cheated on me and that was because of drugs? so in fact no girl has ever willingly cheated on me.

[QUOTE=Darkieus;23777955]I think he's just incredibly insecure. Constantly beefing himself up in an attempt to escape the ridicule that comes with going to high-school at such a young age. That kind of mentality should wear off soon. It'd make an interesting social experiment to date how long that would take.[/QUOTE] It's pretty much impossible to be insecure when you have physiques we do, get the kind of attention we do IRL, and generally are superior to everyone.

[QUOTE=ZuXer;23777959]He sent me a picture. that is not a Timestamp.[/QUOTE] He sent me the same thing and I told him "come at me bro", but he never responded. I was hoping to have a deep intellectual conversation with him. Oh, that's right, he can't have intellectual conversations, I forgot, he's too busy being obsessed with his self-image and flaunting it to other people. Haha, my bad.

[QUOTE=Espio;23777987]NO. "herp derp i have muscles so i get all da gurls! also i am apha whitch is y i get dem all :D" I am 12 stone (british terms bro) my body is probably 20-30% pure fat, I have also had sex well over one and a half thousand times. Try living with the same girl and having sex 5-7 times everyday, have I proved that you don't need to be alpha yet? or do I also need to say that only one girl has cheated on me and that was because of drugs? so in fact no girl has ever willingly cheated on me.[/QUOTE] Insecurities Anonymous. They want YOUR call.

hey did you ever think not all of us give a shit about being alpha and we don't care about being UFC fighters? plenty of people on facepunch have gfs and are perfectly fine with not being in the gym every day and picking up a different slut every night.

[QUOTE=Espio;23777987]NO. "herp derp i have muscles so i get all da gurls! also i am apha whitch is y i get dem all :D" I am 12 stone (british terms bro) my body is probably 20-30% pure fat, I have also had sex well over one and a half thousand times. Try living with the same girl and having sex 5-7 times everyday, have I proved that you don't need to be alpha yet? or do I also need to say that only one girl has cheated on me and that was because of drugs? so in fact no girl has ever willingly cheated on me.[/QUOTE] Bravo and all but you're just feeding the trolls. Pointing and laughing is a better counter than trying to explain how much better you are than these guys. Just doing nothing, by default, makes you a better person.

[QUOTE=ZuXer;23777982]Post a timestamp Picture.[/QUOTE] Later bro. [QUOTE=Espio;23777987]NO. "herp derp i have muscles so i get all da gurls! also i am apha whitch is y i get dem all :D" I am 12 stone (british terms bro) my body is probably 20-30% pure fat, I have also had sex well over one and a half thousand times. Try living with the same girl and having sex 5-7 times everyday, have I proved that you don't need to be alpha yet? or do I also need to say that only one girl has cheated on me and that was because of drugs? so in fact no girl has ever willingly cheated on me.[/QUOTE] Sounds like a nightmare. Having sex with the same girl every day, I bet she isn't very attractive also. I have never been cheated on [b]period[/b].

His brothers totally just made accounts on the forum to show off how alphasome they are. Even if that is you, you are one of those typical facebook fagots, posing in the mirror without clothes on. HOMO.

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23778019]Tonight bro. Sounds like a nightmare. Having sex with the same girl every day, I bet she isn't very attractive also. I have never been cheated on [b]period[/b].[/QUOTE] That is because nobody can cheat on you when having a one night stand dummy.

[QUOTE=ZuXer;23777959]He sent me a picture. that is not a Timestamp.[/QUOTE] He sent me it too, I'm wondering why he's suddenly black, and has a lot less muscles. :raise:

[QUOTE=Zyzz;23778019] Sounds like a nightmare. Having sex with the same girl every day, I bet she isn't very attractive also. I have never been cheated on [b]period[/b].[/QUOTE] That's because [B]you[/B] cheat on other women who aren't attracted to you in the first place. :laugh:

[QUOTE=babo;23778001]It's pretty much impossible to be insecure when you have physiques we do, get the kind of attention we do IRL, and generally are superior to everyone.[/QUOTE] Insecurity is one of the many stepping stones to constantly toning and outfitting yourself with such physiques. Even when you've achieved your goal you feel you can do more, and fear that if you stop- if you try to tread off the beaten path, if you have one less girl than you had the other night, you might be losing your game and once more at risk of ridicule. The kind of attention you get in real life is both hilarious and one to shake your head at. I'm hoping that one day perhaps you and your 'brah' will outgrow this cute stage in your life and, when you're older (or if you don't outgrow this stage, in prison) and look back on your life you'll realize you had the potential to be something so much more. With both physique, a positive attitude, and a brilliant mind (your group happens to lack one of these things, if you can't guess it's the latter) you could have accomplished much; but unfortunately getting various dull-witted girls pregnant to overcome whatever social and personal problems you must contend with in your own mind every day that causes such insecurities is obviously getting the better of you. Unfortunate.

Wow, I never thought fp would fall for this parody/troll thread. You guys are really dumb and I bet the op is laughing his ass of by the reactions of all you, especially the guys saying " Op you are douche, you can't get girls like that" NO FUCKING SHIT. I came here expecting people saying how funny the op was since you know, this was an actually funny parody thread, But holy shit you guys are thick. He's just taking the piss out of you all.

haha i am dying from laughter

he is just feeding his ego.

[quote] - It is beta to smile a lot unless something is actually funny, or you are giving a girl a cheeky smile. [B]Or it's considered chivalry/being social?[/B] - Alphas always show their presence when entering a room or group of people. Make sure you give lots eye contact. [B]So... Run into a room with Ol' Kalb hanging out?[/B] - Good posture makes everyone notice your presence more. [B]Attention Whoring. Remember kids... This is how you get three seconds of fame.[/B] - Always disrespect girls. If a girl is calling you names or something it is imperative you assert your place in the social hierarchy by insulting them worse "call them fat" or something. Girls are never at the top of a social hierarchy it is always an alpha male unless one is not present. Girls will find you attractive if you insult them and have a negative state of mind towards them. Don't ask me how it just works. [B]So fire against fire... Then fist vrs fist when the "Beta" friend gets into a fist fight with you for insulting his friends. Genius. [/B] - If you have a girlfriend, you be the one who makes the decisions do not let her boss you around. Also don't be a dumb ass lovestruck pussy saying I love you all the time. Make it rare to show your affection to her. The best way is by having sex with her. [B]Sexist. No shit. Why do you need sex always?[/B] - Try to be the leader of your group of friends. Tell them what to do. Make them laugh more than everyone else. If someone in your group of friends starts trying to become the leader insult them and call them out on things. [B]Wow. Being a complete chav at it's finest.[/B] - Always state your opinions on things. [B]Okay. Doesn't everyone already do that?[/B] - Insult people who are nerdier than you. [B]No. Real men don't sit around insulting those who have different culture then the other. I don't consider you a man if you do that... I consider you an immature child.[/B] - Lift weights to ensure your natural testosterone levels are high. [B]No. [/B]:effort: - Intelligence != Popularity Dumbing yourself down does not make you more popular. The best alpha males are intelligent and will use their wit and intelligence to call out and insult other alpha males with more venom. [B]Agree'd with the first part. Second part basically made me burst out into laughter. [/B] - Be prepared to fight. If someone wants to fight you and you back down they become higher up in the hierarchy. There are ways to diffuse the situation if you are smart, but you will come out of the situation looking like the weaker man. However there are ways to back down from a fight but look more alpha than the other guy. Heavy insults and a strong verbal attack game are key here. [B]Fighting should never be the answer unless fully needed... Both of the contenders have family... Last thing we need is one in jail or one with head trauma from one using a rock as a weapon. [/B] [/quote] I truly don't care for exercising... 7th grade I fighted almost daily just to seem "Cool" Wanna know what it proved? It proved that handcuffs are painful mother fuckers. My words of advice: Relax, Chill, Make friends with those that are real, and be willing to prove your attitude. I've also heard from a few girls(1-5) that a good majority of girls think it's cute for guys to comment on other guys.

[QUOTE=redstar2424;23778055]Wow, I never thought fp would fall for this parody/troll thread. You guys are really dumb and I bet the op is laughing his ass of by the reactions of all you, especially the guys saying " Op you are douche, you can't get girls like that" NO FUCKING SHIT. I came here expecting people saying how funny the op was since you know, this was an actually funny parody thread, But holy shit you guys are thick. He's just taking the piss out of you all.[/QUOTE] Unfortunate that people get this serious about things, I agree. I just felt like having a heartfelt conversation and seeing the reply. The internet is a path often traveled, and ever so hilarious. It's no wonder China and other nations continue to suppress the flow of 'information' to its people because of it. I'm also glad to see someone has a sense of humor here beyond the obviously trolling Op and countless others laughing right now.