• Skymall: Selling you shit that you dont need.
    102 replies, posted
[QUOTE=MRTW113;23967938]2GB, $90 :bang:[/QUOTE] Rechargeable battery for a usb drive? :bang:
[QUOTE=jjsullivan;23967996]Rechargeable battery for a usb drive? :bang:[/QUOTE] To be fair it's an MP3 player / voice recorder, though I bet dealextreme sells a pen that can record VIDEO for that price.
[IMG]http://imgur.com/zS2jE.jpg[/IMG] Who is this mysterious youth? This is none other than John Du Hart V, FacePunch ex-moderator and web developer. What is so special about John, who we affectionately call compwhizii? Well, compwhizii was born on April 22, 1994, meaning he could not legally work without an official work permit until April 22nd of this year. But, as sources have confirmed, compwhizii was commissioned to work on the next version of Facepunch, Facepunch: vb4, for at least two months prior to John's 16th birthday. What does this mean for your benevolent leader, Gary Numan? Well, for one thing, this explicitly violates the [url="http://www.dol.gov/whd/regs/statutes/FairLaborStandAct.pdf"]Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938[/url], in the United States Code as [url="http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/html/uscode29/usc_sec_29_00000201----000-.html"]29 USC §201[/url]. Because Facepunch Studios also engages in interstate commerce (insofar as Garry and his partners profit off of both Facepunch Forums and Garry's Mod in more than one United States state), Facepunch Studios is liable for an $11,000 minimum fine. In accordance to the "hot goods" provision of the FLSA, Facepunch Forums, being a direct result of illegal child labor, must cease shipment; in this instance, [url]www.Facepunch.com[/url] would cease to exist until all applicable fines are paid. Furthermore, the way in which Garry Newman compensates John Du Hart V is wholly and obviously illegal. Wiring money directly overseas (from England to the United States), circumventing constitutional provisions for income tax, is even more troubling than the exploitation of a blissfully ignorant minor. Neglecting to fill out a W-9 form further proves Garry Numan's intent to willfully circumvent the IRS and, in doing so, mock America and Americans. [url="http://www.edd.ca.gov/pdf_pub_ctr/de573ca.pdf"]These "under-the-table" wages take money away from important civil projects like education and healthcare[/url]; working to decrease the American standard of living. Gary Newman hates you, your community and your country. [IMG]http://imgur.com/5AkjW.jpg[/IMG] John Du Hart V. Unbeknownst to him, he is being exploited at the expense of not only him but America. [IMG]http://imgur.com/EBRMk.jpg[/IMG] Compwhizii purchased this tuxedo with laundered money from none other than Gary Newman. Garry's penchant for white-collar crime doesn't stop there, however. The two highest-ranking moderators, Hezzy and Dragon, receive compensation for their work (Source: Steam chat with none other than Benji). The meager sum of money wired to them directly from Garry Numan violates the federal minimum wage for both Hezzy, a citizen of Great Britain, and Dragon, an American citizen. The irregular hours and unpredictable nature of moderating such a large community lead to an unprecedented amount of stress on Hezzy and Dragon which clearly warrants at least the federally-mandated minimum wage. [img]http://media.giantbomb.com/uploads/1/10057/505145-garry_newman_1__large.jpg[/img] The man himself, Gary Numan. Also pictured is the camera he took as a bribe for providing intangible forum services. Garry Newman's trail of deceit, sadly, does not end there. His nonchalant attitude towards the law corrupted the seemingly incorruptible Benji last year. Benji took bribes, many from minors, in the form of video games. What did Benji do in return? Grant these members Gold Member, and objectively worthless forums upgrade which comes at no cost or difficulty to him. [IMG]http://imgur.com/60XBy.jpg[/IMG] Benji, pictured with a prostitute in England's Red District. This prostitute was purchased by 12-year-old forum member ketchup. What does all of this mean to you, the forumer? Quite simply, posting on Facepunch or buying Garry's Mod is tantamount to exploiting child labor, ignoring the plight of the worker, and using community status in return for cash bribes. You are a terrible person for posting here insofar as your parents are terrible people for having you or for using blood diamonds to signify their shallow, loveless relationship. Your posting here directly affects the lives of millions, and not because your posts are bad (they are). This is Deeper Than Posting. How can you atone for your sins? Quite simply, all you need to do is stop posting here forever. I left for months and came here solely to post these shocking revelations. I plan to leave again, for I am not a monster incapable of compassion for the common man. I write these internet words not to incite revolution but to incite thought; too many of you have been too complacent for too long. In reality, you are all complicit in crimes against humanity. [IMG]http://imgur.com/gROEl.png[/IMG] Thanks for reading my Facepunch magnum opus! Hopefully the words I wrote convince you to reconsider your position here. You know the consequences of continuing to post. Whether or not you decide to stop is up to you. Knowledge is power. [IMG]http://imgur.com/17w2B.jpg[/IMG] Fight The Power. RIP Radio Raheem.
-snip, didn't see the post with the music-
[QUOTE][B]Help strengthen your health with the latest ancient technology.[/B] Otzi, a 5,000 year old mummy found in the Alps during 1991, has spurred a whole new vigor into modern research of the Ancient Chinese medical practice of acupuncture. Recent examinations of the mummy found that Otzi has a number of tattoos that coincide with acupuncture points that would be used to treat various ailments from which he was suffering. [B]The Latest in Ancient Technology[/B] It might sound bizarre. New Ancient Technology? But it really is what the Aculife is all about. Years of research and testing went into the development of the Aculife. The device serves two purposes: (1) send a signal to the operator when a qi point that needed stimulation was touched and (2) could be switched to another setting that would pass a light electrical pulse into the point that required stimulation. [B]Satisfaction Guaranteed[/B] From Otzi the iceman to modern sufferers of chronic pain, inflammation, and body irregularities, acupuncture is a solution to many of our physical ailments. The Aculife will allow you to stimulate your qi where you need it most. A map of acupoints is included with each Aculife. These maps are your pathway to improved qi flow and all the health benefits you may receive from freeing up the blockages in your qi pathways. If you are not completely satisfied, return the Aculife for full refund of the purchase price of the purchase price. Measurements: 5" x 3" x 1.19" Weighs: 4.6 oz. [/QUOTE] [IMG]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/GDA/102104461d.jpg[/IMG] [url]http://www.skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=102104461&c=10645[/url] A completely worthless device for only $200, oh boy!
They're selling freeze dried grass from the Yankee Stadium [url]http://www.skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=203069605&c=[/url]
Really? [img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/ad/21/06/102870479x.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Doomish;23967217][IMG]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/CMP/102632616d.jpg[/IMG] Discreet 2GB Pen Price: $89.99 This multifunction pen digitally records up to 8 hours using a built in microphone. It can also transfer 2 GB of data and play up to 1000 songs in MP3 or WMA format. This Discreet model lives up to its name - it captures sound with no indication that it's running (no flashing light). Includes 3.7V battery. Recharge using any USB port or optional charger. [editline]02:12PM[/editline] :doh: [/QUOTE] Sounds pretty spytech, but not very useful otherwise. Well, at least not so useful it garners a 90 buck pricetag.
[QUOTE=Master Mates;23971594]Really? [IMG]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/ad/21/06/102870479x.jpg[/IMG][/QUOTE] Let me guess, thats around $100-$300?
[QUOTE=Master Mates;23971594]Really? [img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/ad/21/06/102870479x.jpg[/img][/QUOTE] Damn. I was about to post that. [QUOTE=Valon Kyre;23971812]Let me guess, thats around $100-$300?[/QUOTE] $110. [img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/SMH/20100503/203345179d.jpg[/img] This piece of shit attracts murders by lighting up the room to make it seem like someone is at home and watching TV. It may scare off burglars but it won't scare off serial killers.
[QUOTE=SoaringScout;23971816]Damn. I was about to post that. $110.[/QUOTE] If it was $70-80 less, I would buy the fuck out of that.
I blew all of my left over yen on skymall shit on my return flight from Tokyo. They make bank off of customers like this. I still have a few bottles of "liquid oxygen", that was worth a laugh.
[QUOTE=The man of "Wat";23957565]Its useless as fuck, but that pool-couch-bed thingy looks comfy as hell.[/QUOTE] It's a pool floaty with an umbrella stuck in it. [QUOTE=Doomish;23967217][img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/CMP/102632616d.jpg[/img] Discreet 2GB Pen Price: $89.99 This multifunction pen digitally records up to 8 hours using a built in microphone. It can also transfer 2 GB of data and play up to 1000 songs in MP3 or WMA format. This Discreet model lives up to its name - it captures sound with no indication that it's running (no flashing light). Includes 3.7V battery. Recharge using any USB port or optional charger. [editline]02:12PM[/editline] :doh: [img_thumb]http://www.facepunch.com/fp/emoot/doh.gif[/img_thumb][/QUOTE] [url]http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets/security/c3eb/[/url] This records videos and plays MP3s for $10 more. Seriously, who buys this Skymall crap?
Good god, this is just silly
[QUOTE=animephreak135;23973061]I blew all of my left over yen on skymall shit on my return flight from Tokyo. They make bank off of customers like this. I still have a few bottles of "liquid oxygen", that was worth a laugh.[/QUOTE] I presume you know now that there's this thing called a currency exchange office at Narita [editline]f[/editline] [img]http://imgkk.com/i/96va.jpg[/img] [url]http://www.skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=102244915&c=10635[/url] hahaha
Wow a Circulation Improving Cushion for $300? Get out.
[QUOTE=SoaringScout;23971816]This piece of shit attracts [b]murders[/b] by lighting up the room to make it seem like someone is at home and watching TV. It may scare off burglars but it won't scare off serial killers.[/QUOTE] But you won't be home...
I took about 20 skymall magazines off the last airplane I was on bitch flight attendant never brought me my coffee
Oh wow... Personalized World Map Price: $99.95 - $169.95 It's not like I can't just make markings on a map. [img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/SGL/20100223/69745441d.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Zoidbear;23941358]What the hell is that wand for?[/QUOTE] Dark room sex toy.
[img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/BKH/20090714/102943542d.jpg[/img] Parental Control Software Price: $99.95 [QUOTE]Do You Know What Your Children Are Doing On The Internet? Stealth Mode Lets Parents Covertly Monitor Computer Activity Without any indication of monitoring, you can find out exactly what your kids are doing online using the Parental Control Software's patented Stealth Mode feature. No matter how tech savvy your kids or teens are, they will never be able to tell that this software is recording their online activity because it's extremely covert and password protected to prevent it from being uninstalled. Even if you have little or no technical expertise, you can easily install this software and monitor your kids safety - even when you're not around. View Detailed Usage Reports & Protect Your Children From Online Predators Statistics show just how dangerous unrestricted and unmonitored access to websites, e-mails, and chat can be. Parental Control Software can be an invaluable tool for parents who want to find out exactly what their kids are doing online. This software captures ALL online activity including websites visited, instant messages sent, searches, e-mails, & more. Easily manage and block users or websites with the click of a button to help protect your children. Easily Block Users Or Websites With The Press Of A Button Are your kids visiting unauthorized websites or talking to the wrong people? Parental Control Software makes its easy to block various users and websites with the press of a button. Since the software monitors every website visited, every program downloaded, and every application run, you can easily choose to block sites or users.[/QUOTE] Everyone do it with me now: :bang:
[img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/AFV/20090529/102605547d.jpg[/img] Improves breathing, about $100.
When i was younger, i bought a money counter, when it got here, it only counted coins even though it said dollars
[QUOTE=Doomish;23979132][img]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/BKH/20090714/102943542d.jpg[/img] Parental Control Software Price: $99.95 Everyone do it with me now: :bang:[/QUOTE] :bang: :bang: :bang: :bang: :bang: :bang: :bang: :bang: :bang: :bang: [editline]10:13PM[/editline] [url]http://www.skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=102718048&c=102965645[/url] [IMG]http://www.skymall.com/images/products/5a/1f/06/102718048x.jpg[/IMG] LOL
Who says I don't need a $300 pool floaty?
[QUOTE=thirty9th;23979727]Who says I don't need a $300 pool floaty?[/QUOTE] Yes we need it but how...
[QUOTE=Phoenix_20;23979739]Yes we need it but how...[/QUOTE] Maybe I want to attempt to cross the Atlantic in my floaty
[url=thinkgeek.com]think geek[/url] is better. only the shipping my stuf to europe part costs 35 bucks :( so i buy everything in bulk
[QUOTE=thirty9th;23979800]Maybe I want to attempt to cross the Atlantic in my floaty[/QUOTE] excellent ill prepare
[QUOTE=Mega1mpact;23979819][URL="http://thinkgeek.com"]think geek[/URL] is better. only the shipping my stuf to europe part costs 35 bucks :( so i buy everything in bulk[/QUOTE] For some reason, I thought of someone receiving a case of like 400 flash drives
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