• United Kingdom chat thread V3: We still miss our empire
    5,001 replies, posted
[url]https://www.findapprenticeship.service.gov.uk/apprenticeship/-45070[/url] Let's all laugh at this. And then cry knowing it's allowed to exist and that they'll get away with it.
"Completes University of SUBWAY courses as directed." the Onion is leaking into the real world
[QUOTE=Anyx;51975900][URL]https://www.findapprenticeship.service.gov.uk/apprenticeship/-45070[/URL] Let's all laugh at this. And then cry knowing it's allowed to exist and that they'll get away with it.[/QUOTE] Whoa, it's not just sandwich artistry, but point of sale system technician and hygiene maestro too? Damn, you should be paying them!
[QUOTE=Anyx;51975900][url]https://www.findapprenticeship.service.gov.uk/apprenticeship/-45070[/url] Let's all laugh at this. And then cry knowing it's allowed to exist and that they'll get away with it.[/QUOTE] I was wondering why Kiwi was linking me this trash. God fuck apprenticeships, I did one and I was basically doing an actual retail workers job for less than minimal wage. Now while I did enjoy it, I'm never touching these things ever again, so not worth it and this one is a fucking joke.
[QUOTE=UberMunchkin;51976126]I hate how almost every job advertisement has a typo or syntax error.[/QUOTE] I saw at least 4 in that awful subway advert. Seriously, there need to be more requirements for what is actually an apprenticeship, and what is them just getting cheap labour to exploit people. Of course, no way that is going to happen. I just had a look at 5 ones in the area where I live. Two of them advertised "free training provided". I mean, isn't that the fuckin' point of an apprenticeship, trading work for training? Kind of worrying that they felt it is needed to specify. All 5 had multiple typos in them, including one talking about how precise the apprentice would need to be.
[QUOTE=UberMunchkin;51976126]I hate how almost every job advertisement has a typo or syntax error.[/QUOTE] There's a big old sign advertising "luxury apartments" (in a converted office block) that has "thurdsay" on it in my town. Mum hates that sign with a passion.
[QUOTE=Anyx;51975900][url]https://www.findapprenticeship.service.gov.uk/apprenticeship/-45070[/url] Let's all laugh at this. And then cry knowing it's allowed to exist and that they'll get away with it.[/QUOTE] That's disgusting and subway should be shamed into taking this shit down, hard to believe that's legql
The company I did my apprentice for I found out they appeared on BBC Watchdog for scamming people (they changed their name). I left after 2 weeks. :rolleyes:
Companies can basically use Job Centre work experience dweebs as free labour. They can have as many as they want for a set period of time and so long as they say there's a possiblity of a job at the end there's nothing anyone can do so long as the job centre doesn't believe anything's wrong.
[QUOTE=DiscoInferno;51978105]Companies can basically use Job Centre work experience dweebs as free labour. They can have as many as they want for a set period of time and so long as they say there's a possiblity of a job at the end there's nothing anyone can do so long as the job centre doesn't believe anything's wrong.[/QUOTE] Don't forget, they can do one year apprenticeships to avoid actually having to pay national minimum wage, because if they do it for over a year, the 2nd year onward they have to pay nmw. This is why they just rotate people on them yearly, get some chump in, do the apprenticeship, say "hey thanks but we don't need you" and get another tool in to do the same shit all over again. Fucking disgusting.
My friend's brother was unemployed a few years ago and he ended up doing this thing for a supermarket where they had like 5-10 people for we stacking shelves but all of them were voluntary and it was all on the basis that only 1 of them would get the job. Wish they would crack down on abuses of the apprenticeship system though, like if there's a job that any old joe can apply for and get because it's unskilled then there is zero reason for there to be an apprenticeship for it. Stuff like that gives apprenticeships a bad name and is the reason so many people think they are all just dodgy ways for employers to get cheap labor. My old roommate got an 'apprenticeship' at a computer repair shop where he was paid a flat amount cash in hand every month and quit our uni course for it, then 6 months in they turned around and said they needed a new skilled person and they couldn't afford to keep him on so he was dropped. Also let's not forget that iirc apprenticeships are subsidized by the government, so the company actually gets further grants and benefits from the gov't for farming cheap labor. [QUOTE=Reagy;51976776]I was wondering why Kiwi was linking me this trash. God fuck apprenticeships, I did one and I was basically doing an actual retail workers job for less than minimal wage. Now while I did enjoy it, I'm never touching these things ever again, so not worth it and this one is a fucking joke.[/QUOTE] I wouldn't rule apprenticeships out completely, like I was saying a few pages ago usually ones for big companies that have the money to throw around they pay you more than you'd make in a minimum wage job. Apprenticeships in unskilled work or ones that aren't upfront about their pay are most likely going to be paying apprenticeship wages (Which is sort of OK if you are a school leaver living at home looking for some work experience to bridge the gap, but not if you are an adult that actually has living costs) If you are seriously interested in an apprenticeship at a big tech company like Capgemini (Theirs starts off at £18k and they will pay for a degree), I could see if any of my old contacts in the recruiting department are still around and (No promises) possibly get you fast tracked to an interview, but at the very least I can help with the application/interview process because I played a part in designing and trialing it to new apprentices.
Yeah, big companies do actually give you decent apprenticeships and don't just use you for slave labour. I was looking at one with Lloyds Bank and they were paying 15-16k a year for an apprenticeship which is pretty fucking good
Didn't know rolling coal was a thing in the UK until some chav did it to me today :why:
[QUOTE=Morgen;51979513]Didn't know rolling coal was a thing in the UK until some chav did it to me today :why:[/QUOTE] Isn't it actually illegal (and enforced) here, unlike the US?
What even is the point in rolling coal. 'Hey look at me I'm deliberately shitting up the air, enjoy your lung cancer'
I had no idea what rolling coal was, had to google it. Is this the new craze kids are doing? Back in my day we had a craze called 'push bush' where literally one person was secretly nominated to be pushed in the special designated bush and you'd chant 'push bush push bush' At the end of the fad, the ground was covered in twigs and the bush was totally destroyed.
[QUOTE=Mr Kotov;51979781]What even is the point in rolling coal. 'Hey look at me I'm deliberately shitting up the air, enjoy your lung cancer'[/QUOTE] Pretty sure they do it just because they can, or because they're idiots. Others probably do it when they're near electric or hybrid cars, as rolling coal has been dubbed as 'Prius repellant' or 'Hybrid repellant' by some.
[QUOTE=SataniX;51979766]Isn't it actually illegal (and enforced) here, unlike the US?[/QUOTE] I doubt a car doing that could pass it's mot. But not sure if the police bother doing anything about it.
[QUOTE=iThinkN7;51979813]Pretty sure they do it just because they can, or because they're idiots. Others probably do it when they're near electric or hybrid cars, as rolling coal has been dubbed as 'Prius repellant' or 'Hybrid repellant' by some.[/QUOTE] Always downshift past a Prius.
[QUOTE=Morgen;51979892]I doubt a car doing that could pass it's mot. But not sure if the police bother doing anything about it.[/QUOTE] It won't normally (since they'll test emissions). The cheeky buggers most likely have a toggle switch. The police won't do anything about it unless loads of people complain. It's the same story for neds in their shitty excuses for cars belting along the road nearby at 2 in the morning (along with shitty exhaust noises). The police didn't do anything about it until half the area complained, and even then some were stopped and the others just move around to different parts of city to keep away from them. Constant cat and mouse (there's a fucking race track a couple of miles away you stupid fucks. Go and wreck your cars there). Pity the toggle for intelligence broke long ago... [editline]19th March 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=Mr Kotov;51979781]What even is the point in rolling coal. 'Hey look at me I'm deliberately shitting up the air, enjoy your lung cancer'[/QUOTE] Because people are idiots (like those who think having your wheels at 45 degree angles is "cool" when it's by far the most retarded "slamming" effort you can do to a car. My personal favourite is when I saw someone drive over a speedbump with tyres like that. Their car starts grinding along the bump, and they cautiously slow down to a crawl as the grinding gets louder). It's also an idiot magnet because of the plume of smoke it belts out. Just like those idiots with shitty, rusty Nissan Micras who fit turbos onto them which are obviously too big, and remove the silencer (the car doesn't last 6 months like that... Almost guaranteed scrap at the end). Your car is still shit and now it's a rolling joke on wheels. Good job (I say this as a car lover (Well, only classic American Muscle cars) so it's a sad, sad sight to see this happen).
[QUOTE=PyroCF;51980133]Always downshift past a Prius.[/QUOTE] I overtook him and left him in the dust.
[QUOTE=Zenamez;51980574]It won't normally (since they'll test emissions). The cheeky buggers most likely have a toggle switch. The police won't do anything about it unless loads of people complain. It's the same story for neds in their shitty excuses for cars belting along the road nearby at 2 in the morning (along with shitty exhaust noises). The police didn't do anything about it until half the area complained, and even then some were stopped and the others just move around to different parts of city to keep away from them. Constant cat and mouse (there's a fucking race track a couple of miles away you stupid fucks. Go and wreck your cars there). Pity the toggle for intelligence broke long ago... [editline]19th March 2017[/editline] Because people are idiots (like those who think having your wheels at 45 degree angles is "cool" when it's by far the most retarded "slamming" effort you can do to a car. My personal favourite is when I saw someone drive over a speedbump with tyres like that. Their car starts grinding along the bump, and they cautiously slow down to a crawl as the grinding gets louder). It's also an idiot magnet because of the plume of smoke it belts out. Just like those idiots with shitty, rusty Nissan Micras who fit turbos onto them which are obviously too big, and remove the silencer (the car doesn't last 6 months like that... Almost guaranteed scrap at the end). Your car is still shit and now it's a rolling joke on wheels. Good job (I say this as a car lover (Well, only classic American Muscle cars) so it's a sad, sad sight to see this happen).[/QUOTE] I hate UK car culture now. I love how American truck culture is the opposite, it's all about lifting your truck and putting big tyres on it to compensate for something 🤔
I was wandering around yesterday and passed a fishing shop I didn't know existed, decided to go in and have a little look, walked out with an air gun. Probably the dumbest purchase I've made so far this year.
[QUOTE=Doozle;51982194]I was wandering around yesterday and passed a fishing shop I didn't know existed, decided to go in and have a little look, walked out with an air gun. Probably the dumbest purchase I've made so far this year.[/QUOTE] go hunt some air show us a piccy of your kills
[QUOTE=Doozle;51982194]I was wandering around yesterday and passed a fishing shop I didn't know existed, decided to go in and have a little look, walked out with an air gun. Probably the dumbest purchase I've made so far this year.[/QUOTE] in edinburgh, the police will break down my door for having a pint, driving 23mph to the air gun shop and going straight home with it
I've hung a few layers of carpet from the beams in my garage, seems to do the trick for catching pellets [editline]19th March 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=codenamecueball;51982252]in edinburgh, the police will break down my door for having a pint, driving 23mph to the air gun shop and going straight home with it[/QUOTE] You need to register in scotland don't you? [editline]19th March 2017[/editline] I used to have air guns when I was younger, but since moving out never had anywhere to use them. I think my brother's got our old airguns
[QUOTE=Doozle;51982337]I've hung a few layers of carpet from the beams in my garage, seems to do the trick for catching pellets [editline]19th March 2017[/editline] You need to register in scotland don't you? [editline]19th March 2017[/editline] I used to have air guns when I was younger, but since moving out never had anywhere to use them. I think my brother's got our old airguns[/QUOTE] You need an Air Gun license now (think it came into force a year or 2 ago). One of the many attempts at stopping neds from getting guns (but they'll just get their "brother" to buy it and give it to them instead. No license needed). There's still a few shops in Edinburgh which sell them (like, on display in the window, "no questions asked"). They're not hiding them either. You could go in and buy one without issue if you wanted.
I just started reading Filth by Irvine Welsh. Scotland sounds fucking terrifying
My sleep schedule has been destroyed by these complete arseholes partying every night. Got to sleep at 4 PM because I had to go to work and now I just woke up again. Wondering if I should just stay up to hard-reset my sleep. Oh and I have £60 left in my account. Good thing I make a point of stockpiling food
[QUOTE=IAreLegend;51984929]I just started reading Filth by Irvine Welsh. Scotland sounds fucking terrifying[/QUOTE] to give you a good idea of scotland, when i went to lidl yesterday some guy was stumbling around outside with blood all over his hands (idk if he was drunk or high) while two teenagers on a motorbike were speeding up and down a football pitch nearby. one end of the football pitch had a burnt out car
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.