zonkem's tips on how to smoke inside (without getting caught) - General

I just go in the backyard or whatever idk why it needs to be such a huge mission haha

Yeah people trip too much about it lol.

[QUOTE=geogzm;43071707]if you have a square fan and a sliding window, lodge the fan in the window so that it's blowing air out of the room - an open window can potentially keep the smell in more than getting rid of it[/QUOTE] This is what I do. Works amazingly well if you sit right next to it and keep the bowl close to the fan when you're not hitting it.

[QUOTE=zach1193;43125384]I'm gonna go ahead and be that guy and just say that this thread is irrelevant, if you smoke in your house, and burn incense, and get high frequently, you're gonna get caught in your house, not to mention I don't know anyone who just burns incense for fun and don't smoke weed haha it's just all so obvious, especially if your parents used to be smokers or something. Everyone always thinks they never will, and very few never do, but in the majority of times, you're gonna be caught. "But what about me, I've been smoking for like a year or two now and haven't been caught?" Your parents dont care! or they're trying to ignore the situation/ avoiding bringing it up by either being embarrassed, or nervous about it or what have you. You're never going to be able to know if it smells dank if you just smoked, and weed smoke is very strong, especially to people who don't smoke can smell it from pretty far away, or however light the smell may be. You can continue to try if you wish, but if you really don't want to get caught, just leave your house, and toke somewhere private outside, and that really can't be that difficult, especially considering many of you probably don't live in large cities, and even then.[/QUOTE] not really, me and my friend smoked in his house quite often (2+ years) and never actually got caught, you just have to be really fucking paranoid

Im glad I have the outside option, I dont have to worry about smell at all as long as i have some gum or a drink ready. Completely eliminates a lot of the micromanaging.

used to be ultraparanoid about it until i got caught now i just make sure it doesn't smell too badly of weed in my room or i smoke outside because my parents told that other than the smell they were fine with it [editline]9th December 2013[/editline] these are good tips though if you need to stay sneaky

I just go outside. There is no point in doing all of this when you can just go outside and smoke out there. Pretty much the only complaint is being so fucking cold during this season. I go out with no shirt on so the smell does not stay, which sucks when it is so cold.

[QUOTE=zach1193;43125384]I'm gonna go ahead and be that guy and just say that this thread is irrelevant, if you smoke in your house, and burn incense, and get high frequently, you're gonna get caught in your house, not to mention I don't know anyone who just burns incense for fun and don't smoke weed haha it's just all so obvious, especially if your parents used to be smokers or something. Everyone always thinks they never will, and very few never do, but in the majority of times, you're gonna be caught. "But what about me, I've been smoking for like a year or two now and haven't been caught?" Your parents dont care! or they're trying to ignore the situation/ avoiding bringing it up by either being embarrassed, or nervous about it or what have you. You're never going to be able to know if it smells dank if you just smoked, and weed smoke is very strong, especially to people who don't smoke can smell it from pretty far away, or however light the smell may be. You can continue to try if you wish, but if you really don't want to get caught, just leave your house, and toke somewhere private outside, and that really can't be that difficult, especially considering many of you probably don't live in large cities, and even then.[/QUOTE] I will kinda second this - I smoke and my parents rarely notice anything, dad never smells anything but mom has noticed the smell of smoke maybe 3-4 times over half a year, but I get away with it by pretending it's my jacket smelling of cigarette smoke or whatever.

[QUOTE=Widgeon;43072117]I live in a dorm room with a common suite area we share with 2 other rooms and we have smoke dectors in our walls. We cover them up with plastic bags around the wall and then put puddy around the outside of the bag so NO bad air can get in. Then I crafted a little tube thing with a computer fan on it that sucks smoke in and then blows it outside through the AC unit. It works quite well. While we only use it with vapes and bongs. We then cover the bottom of our door with wet towels and febreeze the SHIT out of room and suite area. Our suite mates are also smokers so they dont give a shit about the slight smell in the suite area. But from outside the suite you cant smell anything. We also do it at night when the RAs are alsleep and nobody is walking around.[/QUOTE] Are the smoke detectors the ones you can simply remove and turn off/take the batteries out? Or are they the ones that are drilled in the wall?

[QUOTE=MrJazzy;43134414]I will kinda second this - I smoke and my parents rarely notice anything, dad never smells anything but mom has noticed the smell of smoke maybe 3-4 times over half a year, but I get away with it by pretending it's my jacket smelling of cigarette smoke or whatever.[/QUOTE] Its kinda funny because I dont really know if my parents know or not. Like there has never been a shift in how they treat me even after very close calls, but even those close calls you wouldnt think of me smoking because of the mindset. Ive interacted with them high, hell the other day after a fresh bowl for some random reason a bunch of my family came over and down into my den. I handled it no problem since i used eyedrops and drank some ice tea. And im 99% sure they would not be cool with it because they wouldnt want me to get caught and shit. So I dont know whether I agree or not. Can people be totally oblivious to it, yeah, but you need to make sure your parents are the gullible, accepting kind or that you are in good standing cause then no one suspects anything. You are good lil Jimmy who dont do no drugs. Idk, i totally get zach, but i feel like if you are good enough and lucky enough you can get away with it.

I know that my parents don't think I get high because if they knew I'd be locked up in rehab or something. I've interacted with them high several times too yeah, I like my own privacy and usually only talk a little so it's easy for me to get away with it.

It's said in the OP but I want to reinforce something for all those youngsters that wanna toke without getting caught- [b][i]If it's paper, wait till later. Through a pipe: let it light.[/i][/b]

I recently got "caught" by my parents because I forgot to clean up some grinded up bud that fell on the floor. This is like the second time in two months. Ughh. My parents are so annoying about it bc they think I'll get addicted to it or something. I only rip like 3 times a week max, they also think I'm quitting but yeah... That's not happening. I really gotta get my act together and hide my stuff better, especially the smell

[QUOTE=Maximoon;43141211]It's said in the OP but I want to reinforce something for all those youngsters that wanna toke without getting caught- [b][i]If it's paper, wait till later. Through a pipe: let it light.[/i][/b][/QUOTE] Pretty much this. My pipe lets me toke and then put it away pretty quickly if I'm done with less of a smell

[QUOTE=iwork3daysaweek;43125828]I just go in the backyard or whatever idk why it needs to be such a huge mission haha[/QUOTE] Bro it's going to be below freezing until like april where I live, i hate smoking in the cold

Considering how much quicker a pipe is to hit, clean up, and put away I dont see why someone would not pick one up for like $15. I can see how papers allows you to get rid of the evidence fairly easily but if you are dealing with speed and smell pipe is your best bet. [QUOTE=AugustBurnsRed;43144672]Bro it's going to be below freezing until like april where I live, i hate smoking in the cold[/QUOTE] Yeah winter sucks for me since I smoke outside. But I spend on average 3-5 min packing, hitting, and hiding my shit outside so as long as I have a layer on i can hop out finish off a bowl and head back in.

I'd smoke outside but it's just not normal for me so it'd be obvious that something was up. "I'm just taking a walk" is clear bullshit. Maybe "I'm heading down the shop" would work out. But I smoke indoors and don't get caught. Nighttime, candles, window cracked, hitting a pipe and letting smoke drain out the window with a blanket lining the door all seems to work out well

For smoking outside it is weird during the winter but you are so quick in and out usually no one notices. I look at it like this, the longer you are out the more of a chance of getting caught. Yeah I know pretty obvious but you really are just playing the gambling game, you either chose the proper time to go out when no one is going to check up on you(0% of getting caught) or you just got unlucky and your dad decided for no reason he wanted to come over and say whats up. Pick and choose your opportunities accordingly. Dont force a situation, if your parents are for some reason just not going to bed that night at their usual time, fuck it leave it for some other time. There have been plenty of times where I pushed it and really got lucky that I didnt get busted.

[QUOTE=Cpn Crunch21;43150469]For smoking outside it is weird during the winter but you are so quick in and out usually no one notices. I look at it like this, the longer you are out the more of a chance of getting caught. Yeah I know pretty obvious but you really are just playing the gambling game, you either chose the proper time to go out when no one is going to check up on you(0% of getting caught) or you just got unlucky and your dad decided for no reason he wanted to come over and say whats up. Pick and choose your opportunities accordingly. Dont force a situation, if your parents are for some reason just not going to bed that night at their usual time, fuck it leave it for some other time. There have been plenty of times where I pushed it and really got lucky that I didnt get busted.[/QUOTE] In my house if you open a door you can hear it from pretty much anywhere my parents would be.

Ah see im lucky both I am far from them in the house and they are old and have a hard time hearing sometimes.

[QUOTE=AugustBurnsRed;43081817]My sploof is made out of a paper towel roll reinforced with TP rolls, wrapped in duct tape to seal it completely[/QUOTE] I used the tube from a roll of saran wrap, it's thick as shit, no way you could crush it by stepping on it, and it could double as a weapon in a pinch.

If I ever do it inside I usually just try to finish the whole bowl in 1 hit, and after I finish inhaling it I block the top of it with my thumb trapping any excess smoke inside. Then I blow it out of the window.

[QUOTE=Maximoon;43141211]It's said in the OP but I want to reinforce something for all those youngsters that wanna toke without getting caught- [b][i]If it's paper, wait till later. Through a pipe: let it light.[/i][/b][/QUOTE] Through a pipe, you got no gripe* it has to rhyme lol

[QUOTE=Maximoon;43141211]It's said in the OP but I want to reinforce something for all those youngsters that wanna toke without getting caught- [b][i]If it's paper, wait till later. Through a pipe: let it light.[/i][/b][/QUOTE] I tried to smoke before college in the morning on monday, i took one toke through a pipe and after about 10 seconds my mom shouted up the stairs "Who's smoking weed this time in the morning", i swear she's a sniffer dog :c

why not just grab a toke on the way? i like to hit some oil out of a vape pen on my way to school in the AM

[U][B]Mindfuck's/Moondog's tips on how to smoke inside[/B][/U] disclaimer: With my tips you can totally not give a shit about Zack's dweeb ass phony "tips". [B]Tip #1: Cover the smell up[/B] As I said before: Don't give a shit. Except do exactly that. With my real tips you can smoke at home without any need to be discreet. Your parents can even be at home while you do. Leave the door open, it doesn't matter. Just light up some ganj however you want, don't open any windows(!! This is important !!). When you're done smoking you can start to cover up the smell. You don't need a lot of utensils for this. You have everything you need on you. Well I hope.. You just figure out the centre of your room, or the room you're smoking in. Then you proceed to take a massive fucking shit right on the floor, all like "Fuck you, mum and dad!" The smell of fresh feces in a closed room is sure to cover up the weed smell enough for anyone to be immediately willing leave the room. Aaaaand you're safe. [B]Tip #2: The element of surprise and distraction are your friends[/B] This tactic is for the worst case scenario, i.e. if everything else fails (Zack's stupid shit tips and my sweet as hell tactic), you use this to get yourself out of the deal. Again, for this, all you need is on your body. If you start to sesh at home and your parents are also there or you're not too sure when they will return, you just pull this off and it will save your pansy ass. Preparation is key here, though. You just normally sit wherever you want to sit like you normally do. This can be at your computer, the couch, any other couch, or anything fucking else. I dont care. Then you proceed to whip your dick out and start to get yourself hard (obviously this only works for male people. If you are not a male person, you better start thinking of something else, gurl). It is VERY [B]VERY[/B] important that you stay hard during the whole time that you are exposed to risk of detection. If the moment comes - and it is uncertain IF the moment will come - the mere sight of your hardened cock is enough to create such a tense, awkward moment between you and who ever was about to bust you, that this person will immediately leave and even apologise. This [B]WILL[/B] work even if your room/the house reeks of dope. It is just too awkward. Good thing none of you have a soul or any sense of decency so you can just simply keep smoking with your stiff, throbbing dick out and not give a fuck. [editline].[/editline] Add this to the OP please!

Go in your kitchen, go under the hood vent, turn the fan on and smoke anything you like at any time you like.

Man, I was going to buy some Ozium on Amazon, but the Shipping was like 25 fucking dollars

Charrax's Guide 1) Go in bathroom 2) Turn on bathroom vent 3) Put any fabrics on the floor 4) Smoke If the vent sucks spray hairspray, instantly kills the smell. (Keep vent on)

[QUOTE=Charrax;43311462]Charrax's Guide 1) Go in bathroom 2) Turn on bathroom vent 3) Put any fabrics on the floor 4) Smoke If the vent sucks spray hairspray, instantly kills the smell. (Keep vent on)[/QUOTE] And how would you know if it kills the smell or not if you're the one getting high?