• So I think my girlfriend might be a nymphomaniac
    240 replies, posted
[QUOTE=thisispain;25674960]e Alabama Hot Pocket is a special fetish maneuver that roughly involves taking a shit into a woman's vagina, typically followed up by a good ole fuckin'. The term "Alabama" originated from a lesser known, but crucial additional practice that involves "Porky Piggin'" the female who has recieved the Hot Pocket. In Alabama, you see, good old redneck boys, when bored, would fuck pig troughs or large, wet piles of mud. To properly perform the Porky Piggin' follow-up procedure, one must take a massive shit onto the vagina WITHOUT spreading the lips. This creates a core that enters the woman, and then dregs that explode out all over her. By randomly stabbing with the cock, one will successfully Porky Piggin' the girl... repeating, naturally, the action that would normally be associated with screwing a pile of mud or animal trough. Yeah boy, I gave her a good ole Alabama Hot Pocket. What? No shit I Porky Piggin'd that shit.[/QUOTE] It's not as bad as it sounds, guys. Just make sure you have some air freshener nearby for afterwards. :x
you're fucked man
Lucky bastard.. :ohdear:
Buy her World of Warcraft.
Haven't had a chance to read any of the new posts yet, but I'm just going to throw it out there it happened again today...3 separate times :3:
you lucky shit.
Boo hoo You must be so sad prick
[QUOTE=ItchyBarracuda;25695471]Haven't had a chance to read any of the new posts yet, but I'm just going to throw it out there it happened again today...3 separate times :3:[/QUOTE] You lucky son of a cunt.
Post about it on Facepunch. Oh wait...
[QUOTE=3com111;25631608]I wish I could get my girlfriend to be more sexual. She's fucking tired all the time from school and work and is never in the mood.[/QUOTE] Who gives a shit, go suicide then if you don't like live.
[QUOTE=ItchyBarracuda;25695471]Haven't had a chance to read any of the new posts yet, but I'm just going to throw it out there it happened again today...3 separate times :3:[/QUOTE] Post videos. [editline]28th October 2010[/editline] I'm dead serious with the amount of sex you're having you could record every time open your own paysite and make a fuckload of money.
I'm not sure if anyone has mentioned this (probably not considering the demographic we are talking about), but if you aren't trolling, why hasn't your girlfriend gotten a vibrator? The crazy intensity of the orgasms can normalize libido to a more manageable level for both of you. If you want recommendations for her, let me know. I worked at a sex shop for a little bit :)
[QUOTE=Mane;25697071]I'm not sure if anyone has mentioned this (probably not considering the demographic we are talking about), but if you aren't trolling, why hasn't your girlfriend gotten a vibrator? The crazy intensity of the orgasms can normalize libido to a more manageable level for both of you. If you want recommendations for her, let me know. I worked at a sex shop for a little bit :)[/QUOTE] Surprisingly (and to my delight) she isn't interested in vibrators. I don't know enough about them but from what I understand they desensitize your nerves to an extent that you'll almost become reliant on using them to reach orgasm, which I don't think she wants.
dude you should get your head out of your ass and stick it in hers [editline]28th October 2010[/editline] [QUOTE=ItchyBarracuda;25702082]Surprisingly (and to my delight) she isn't interested in vibrators. I don't know enough about them but from what I understand they desensitize your nerves to an extent that you'll almost become reliant on using them to reach orgasm, which I don't think she wants.[/QUOTE] Yeah, but then you leave it for a week and the sensitivity comes back. Like for fapping.
[QUOTE=ItchyBarracuda;25702082]Surprisingly (and to my delight) she isn't interested in vibrators. I don't know enough about them but from what I understand they desensitize your nerves to an extent that you'll almost become reliant on using them to reach orgasm, which I don't think she wants.[/QUOTE] This isn't true :( And why are you happy about that? It's not like you can't have sex while she uses one.
[Img]http://www.karolinagames.com/horatio/images/6591151105cc.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Mane;25702578]This isn't true :( And why are you happy about that? It's not like you can't have sex while she uses one.[/QUOTE] I dunno, she hasn't expressed any interest in having one. It's not like it's necessary during sex for us. And I'm happy because I've heard stories of how chicks started using vibrators and it became the only way they could get off. Even if it's not true I wouldn't want to run the risk (and I don't think she does either).
With a girl like that, you'd expect her to WANT to make a porn movie with ya... DOES SHE?!?!?!?!
Op got the jackpot!
[QUOTE=ItchyBarracuda;25708583]I dunno, she hasn't expressed any interest in having one. It's not like it's necessary during sex for us. And I'm happy because I've heard stories of how chicks started using vibrators and it became the only way they could get off. Even if it's not true I wouldn't want to run the risk (and I don't think she does either).[/QUOTE] You might have heard stories, but this isn't true. There are different receptors on the clitoris that trigger pleasure in women; some are mechanoreceptors that activate with pressure (tongue or digit) while others are vibroreceptors that activate with high rates of vibration. One will not deactivate the other. And she hasn't expressed any interest in having one probably because she's never used one. I have yet to meet a girl who hasn't fallen in love with her vibrator once she gets one. But none of their sex lives with their boyfriends (or girlfriends) get worse; in fact, [b]they get a lot better[/b].
BTW OP, how old is she (and you, while you're at it)?
[QUOTE=Mane;25732698]You might have heard stories, but this isn't true. There are different receptors on the clitoris that trigger pleasure in women; some are mechanoreceptors that activate with pressure (tongue or digit) while others are vibroreceptors that activate with high rates of vibration. One will not deactivate the other. And she hasn't expressed any interest in having one probably because she's never used one. I have yet to meet a girl who hasn't fallen in love with her vibrator once she gets one. But none of their sex lives with their boyfriends (or girlfriends) get worse; in fact, [b]they get a lot better[/b].[/QUOTE] But still, if she doesn't want one, I don't see the point in pushing the idea. She seems perfectly happy without it. [QUOTE=Pretiacruento;25734591]BTW OP, how old is she (and you, while you're at it)?[/QUOTE] We're both 20.
stupid double post
Holy fucking shit, really. This new automerge system sucks.
[QUOTE=ItchyBarracuda;25736051]But still, if she doesn't want one, I don't see the point in pushing the idea. She seems perfectly happy without it.[/QUOTE] Oh, to be young and unexperimental again ;)
the chastity thingy ! :v:
Get summm
If it's a physical problem she's having, as in, when she's not with you she feels the need to masturbate as much as having sex with you, she should see a professional about it. If it's a mental thing though, try using words~ when you're out in public say something like, "If you can wait until we get home, it'll be ten times better than it will here," or, "If you wait half an hour, I'll give you multiple orgasms and you won't be able to walk the next day." Just saying. Take the control, and make her want to wait. Then follow up- and your problem should go away. ;) Oh- and I forgot to mention, sex in public can be a big turn-on. I've definitely had to resist the urge to jump my boyfriend in random public places.
Get her a hobby to replace the sexual desire if you can't take it anymore.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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