Australia Thread v7 - a pack of durries and a slab of piss - General

I duckfaced on my linkedin profile pic and my potential employer had a printout of of the page and complimented me on my aesthetically pleasing face. I got that job. Dont talk shit mate But for real, I forgot to change the pic and they looked me up.

Oh shit, you cunts in Sydney ready? https://i.imgur.com/o7yMLVV.jpg

Man fuck street preachers, ever talk to the cunts? Theyre fucking loons the lot of them.

fuck, it's a good 10 hour drive to get there. better get moving

So I was driving home tonight when I realised I'd turned my radio off. Turning it on it immediately started playing Triple J. The first words I heard was some gy talking about "cis penises". I thought it was a bit odd but then I realised he was probably talking about it in relation to trans people or something. Nope. He was talking about not doing something (dick piercings?) because because staunching blood on a "cis penis" is very difficult and will certainly require an emergency room visit. He went on and on, and every time he specifically said "cis penis". At no point was this in relation to trans people.

triple j is dog shit

They can recite entire books of the bible. And I only just pass my uni exams

The fuck is wrong with some people was on a 110km/h dual carriageway, and a cyclist was riding on the white line that divides the outside lane and the bike lane, as opposed to riding in the bike lane. They weren’t even riding abreast of another cyclist. Fucking everyone, including trucks, were having to merge into the inside lane to get around the asshole And about a minute later, another asshole parked on the shoulder decided to pull out right in front of me, but the fucker did not accelerate anywhere near fast enough. I had to slam on the brakes, and by the time I merged and got around then on the inside lane, they were still only doing around 50km/h. On a 110km/h dual carriageway

My old neighbours were methheads and im pretty sure the dad cooked it himself as well, could always smell acetone and acids from outside. Nearly every night this batshit crazy woman would be wailing and screaming (his ex wife) about not getting a fix or whatever, we called the cops nearly every night. That period of time fucking sucked. Then some kid moved in next door with anger issues (also on meth), kicked holes in my fence and threatened to kill my parents after his fucking dog got out and tried to attack us in our own front yard, had to lock ourselved in our house and call cops, then the dog got put down as it also tried to attack passers by (apparently it had a history of being violent). And every other day he would threaten my mum by screaming over the back fence. Fuck neighbours. Glad i moved out from there, and glad my patents did too.

I live right next to a farm. My neighbours are all animals baa-aaa moo

I'm currently in the UK and all their food tastes so sweet, even just making a stew with canned tomatoes, carrots and mushrooms etc. With no added sugar tastes really sweet what is going on

The canned tomatoes probably has a shitload of added sugar?

I didn't really notice this when I moved, although the UK food quality defo isn't as high as Aus. Talking about Aus, I'm super homesick D: Thinking of moving back to Perth in Feb but really don't know

I checked and it's not an ingredient, just tomatoes and acidity or some shit. Maybe the vegetables are just sweeter, they're definitely smaller and not oversized like we have in Aus

See I don't mind the weather here, but the tiny houses and the fact I can't really do all my hobbies due to the nazi vehicle insurance in the UK is something I miss dearly. In saying that I'd probably miss the ease of travel if I moved back to Aus lmao

Yeah one massive difference is the houses and how the cities are built. Everything is so close to each other which is great, but everything is so fucking tiny which sucks

wtf i got a call from cessnock correctional centre on my way home from work today. i don't know anyone in prison

Was me m8, I live in necknock

hey so whats up with advertising the ponies on the Opera house? who the fucks heard of the Everest Cup?

the iconic sydney opera house should not be used to advertise anything let alone horse races, fuck off ya dog cunts

Given the logic behind the airsoft ban I cannot wait for someone to try and pass a law banning vr "war games"

Why would a tram line cause your car to be covered in sand?

Thank you guys for the amazing bands and musicians. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QT_1XIHOQZo

There’s only one https://files.facepunch.com/forum/upload/226043/3082b7ae-dd4c-4809-b291-ddf6cd230b57/FA5182A0-3B82-43BE-97C2-B1F7D419FC6C.gif

Trams use sand for their brakes so whenever they stop at the tram stop right out the front of my house it leaves a bunch of it behind. Its so fine it gets picked up by the wind and goes everywhere.

i love the weird shit some of our musicians make. nick cave, the drones, king giz, they're like finely crafted shitposts in audio format https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1YO2gfemTw

https://twitter.com/filthibis/status/1057968085036986368 November 1 Yikes

Freeze them, don't pay an arm and a leg for one a week before Christmas.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Inr7FKKWLI I like you guys

Its that time of year where thousands of aussies forget about animal welfare all in the name of "just a bit of fun, innit?"