I finally received the battery I ordered for my camera and it's... not the right battery .-.
Well that was a big disappointment
You know what, I fucking hate myself for something I could not help. I was born with ASD, OCD, Tourette, now got anxiety and depression. But Tourette and ASD (maybe OCD) are neurological issues. That means by law I'm not allowed to work in the field as security, law enforcement, military, fire department, or a simple mall cop. Things I've always wanted to do. Yes, I am fully aware that due to my issues I become a risk to those I work with because there's basic things I can't handle, especially since there's no cure to it. And that's what really sucks.
It's like LGBT people that aren't allowed in the military, but they're no safety risk, it's just a bad law that will change in the future, but for me? There is no future. Like I said I can fully understand why I'm not allowed to have the same opportunity like anyone else, but I still feel personaly attacked; discriminated, and it hurts my feelings deeply and causes distress in my identity on who I am and what my future beholds. But I must admit that my disabilities are an invisible prison, and not visual like an amputated leg, but in a way I have my legs amputated and I must accept my fate that I can't do what others can. But being born the wrong way feels so unfair. People get attacked for sexual diversity all the time, but society slowly adapts to their understanding, but neurodiversity is a no-go unless there's some breakthrough that probably won't happen in my life time. We all adapt to society, but I believe it is society that is supposed to adapt to the individual. Social issues, educational issues, barely any employer wants us, and combine that with the disabilities I already have it makes me want to end my life, and I don't remember the last time I was happy, or if I even have been.
I just want the same as other people have. But I won't.
I'm not going to pretend to understand what you are going through, but I've had a similar situation of being forced out of an occupation I loved (twice) because of health issues.
I'd wanted to be an EMT since the age of twelve and was an active frontline Red Cross volunteer literally from my 16th Birthday when they let me join. A year later and I got accepted onto an EMT course despite being very young for an EMT where I am from and then found myself put forward to become the youngest junior officer the ambulance organisation had ever had in it's history (granted this was a very small private service). I was super happy with my life but unfortunately things had started happening when I turned seventeen, starting with numbness and weakness in the legs and spells of semi-blindness in my left eye as well as early signs of asthma and a diagnosis of bipolar personality disorder that ultimately saw me having to resign from the service. Years later I would find out these things were either caused by or linked to MS.
This hit me like a ton of bricks; my family life had never been amazing but the ambulance service acted like a second family to me. Having to leave was a very emotional time as not only did I have my entire career path taken away from me but also my surrogate family. I decided to get a degree in music and took up a volunteering position working with kids and young adults with profound intellectual and mental disabilities teaching them work skills and later found myself training to become a music therapist after having met one in my field of work. I moved to another country entirely (where I now live) and started my Master's in music therapy after seeing the benefit it had to the people I worked with, but half a year into it I noticed that my hands and fingers could not properly play the piano or guitar thanks to the progression of MS and lesions had started to form in my brain which exacerbated bipolar disorder massively. This was yet another thing I had to lay down and forget.
I am now working in water management and environmental protection and hoping to move into policy. I don't know how long my mobility is going to last and I am likely going to require a wheelchair fulltime at some point in the future if things continue to progress the way they do but it is just something I've gotta deal with because it's not gonna go away.
I understand that my situation is different from yours and we have very different issues, but both of us are prevented from taking up the employment opportunities we wished we could have through no fault of our own; I can never return to active duty in the ambulance service due to my poor health putting colleagues and patients at risk. The only advice I feel I can give is to find something you are passionate about that you can do and find a way to make a career of it. It took me two, almost three years before realising that water management was something I was interested in. I know people with similar health issues who have spent a decade before they found their niche. It will take time, but eventually you'll find something you can do that just 'clicks'.
My sister just forced my father to dig up her dog and bury it in another spot while she watched. I'm fucking disgusted. Why is it getting worse all the time? Why can't things go back to normal?
How the hell do I even begin to qualify getting out of the retail job race. I've been stuck in retail for a few years, and I don't even know where to begin getting out.
I'm afraid of taking a college course because of how much time it would consume being absolutely dedicated along with all the potential costs. I've always wanted to do some kind of IT work, or even a deskjob where I don't have to physically strain myself as much as I would doing heavy-lifting for people. Dunno where to begin when it comes to taking trade schools, though it seems like a much more viable option.
I don't even mind the pay this place is giving me, its great; but I'd be much happier getting a dollar or two less, and not having to drive home with every part of my body in pain afterwards.
Anarchy online is the only mmo i enjoy, the atmosphere, the gameplay, the fucking awesome music, the aesthetic. But fuck me i just cant get back into it cos playing as a free to play player limits what you can do too much. Also it was much better playong with friends in highschool.
mouse might be starting to bite the dust, either getting constant double left clicks or left clicks not reading at all
rip
When you somehow manage to burn food despite watching it the entire time.
Is it normal to feel obscene amounts of anxiety for my own mortality on a regular basis? I swear I spend most of my day dealing with the fact that me or someone I care about could kick it at any time. I've been like this ever since my dog died 9 or so years ago and I hate it.
I lost 3 hours of sleep today because a fake alarm clock in my dream woke me up.
Thanks, brain...
I think about that shit on a daily basis, so yes - I'm hoping it's more or less normal.
Why the fuck did people review bomb the old Metro games just because their devs aren't putting the next game on Steam?
I thought 4chan was full of childish scum, but this just exceeds expectations
Decided to re install GTA5 to mess around on with mods, big mistake, due to the steaming pile that is Social Club. I normally play in offline mode, but I can't do that because I have to log in at least once so R*'s DRM bullshit can see I own the game, but I can't log in because I forget the PW and I can't change the fucking PW because the SC site won't load. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
casual transphobia at my school gets me mad
i was talking to this guy and he shows me a pic of a trans woman and he's like "lol this guy thinks he's a girl" as if some random selfie of someone is something worthy of ridicule
this isn't the first incident of this guy pulling this kind of stuff, it's just insulting and disrespectful
I used to until i adjusted my thinking on mortality and death. It made me uncomfortable for a while but its very comforting to me now.
Basically: one day i will die, people may grieve for me or miss me but it doesnt matter to me, im gone at that point, nothing. One day all those people will be gone and they wont matter any more and eventually everyone will be gone. If i die in the most horrible way it wont matter because i wont feel anything when im dead. All of the things i aim for in life and all the good times wont make a difference in the end, however this means every mistake and disappointment also wont make a difference. You can only truly experience right now so if you live in and only for that moment you can enjoy the short time you have. This means that life truly has no meaning other than just to exist, so there is nothing about death to fear because you wont be missing out on anything.
What's this video embed? It looks funky...
*Immense earrape that shatters speakers*
Okay my heart just skipped a beat. Never again.
Weekends. Where I live, they are not fun to plan at all and with so few options, there will inevitably be moments where I can't not save my money due to being beaten half to death by Monday.
I love working 8 to 5. If I have to work later my giveafuckness drops to 0%. Also people giving me grief about leaving at 5, I'm sorry you have no life and feel everyone needs to work until 8.
8AM class and I commute an hour.
Fucking falling asleep at the wheel is going to get me killed.
COOOL
When a conversation just fucking switches topics after I contribute, with no acknowledgement to anything I just added to it, so I have to sit there looking like an autistic fuckhead who just posted a paragraph about shit nobody cares about.
I left my study books at work today and I don’t have a key to the office so I can’t go back and get them. There goes studying this weekend. They were in the office in the first place because I occasionally study on lunch breaks.
But I can’t be too mad, because the reason why I forgot to take them home is because we clocked off early to have some beers down at the pub, haha.
My birthday is coming up and I'm frustrated because I think my parents are going to try to exploit it.
We haven't spoken in three months after they bullied my little sister into a suicide attempt, mostly because they're still mad that I confronted them about it. How fucking dare I, right? After figuring out that I'm not a teenager anymore they can't just force me to drop it they've basically decided I'm not worth the trouble and have severed contact.
For the most part, that is. See, it's not good enough for them to refuse to admit that they're wrong, they have to convince themselves and everyone else they're in the right. So they're putting on airs that everything is fine and I'm the one being an asshole by not letting things get better, despite the fact that the only way they'll let that happen is if they get unilateral control over the discussion and I'm the one apologizing. I do not want them using my birthday to make some kind of hollow gesture so that they can feel better about themselves and reaffirm their position. They already did that with Christmas, sending through my sister a box of old family photos and an empty album, an obvious dig at me "turning my back at them when they did so much for me".
And, no, it wasn't a sign that they wanted to talk because my sister asked on my behalf and the result was their immediate hostility to the idea and a rhetorical "this is what I'd tell him" rant.
I don't want anything from them. I don't even want them to say anything about it. I already have their stupid box of photos sitting unopened in the corner of my office and I'm about to either return it or toss it out because it bugs me every time I see it.
I already know this grudge of theirs is going to last a lifetime, and I've come to terms with that. They've cut people off for far less. But if that's what they want then that's what they're going to get. They don't get to use me or my birthday to javk off their own fucking egos about what great parents they are because they sent a card and made a shallow-ass "HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SWEET BABY-BOO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH" post on the Facebook page I haven't used in ten years so that all their stupid shit-eating friends they suck up to can see it and comment on how fortunate I am to have such loving and compassionate parents. Fuck them.
Fuck all of them.
I'm deleting my Facebook this weekend. I want nothing to do with any of it.
People need to stop fucking dying
Why do I just randomly get a lump in my throat that I can't get rid of?
This is annoying as hell and it causes me to over eat because that's the only thing that gives me any temporary relief from this.
That and gargling salt water.
Mucinex is just going to make me feel dehydrated all day.
What the hell is this and why does it just HAPPEN out of nowhere and then stick with me for the rest of the day?
"d00d it's just a game calm down!" - Only a person who's winning.
Perhaps this should go in unpopular opinions, but I am this person, though I say it in every circumstance, even if I'm losing or on a losing team. I never have the intention of being patronising or condescending, but I do genuinely believe some people can get really heated over games. Rage compilations and the like don't make me laugh, they just make me wince because I don't understand under what circumstances yelling at a screen is necessary. Internalised anger? Sure. One step away from yeet-ing your computer out of the window? Not so much.
I'm sure my judgement on this is clouded because of the try-hardy, butthurtish people on Overwatch. Unless it's a Counter-Strike game, where everything there is just purely negative, but I've played that only a few times since I can't stomach the people on the horrid game. So many angry self-appointed """""coaches""""" on games like that.
https://files.facepunch.com/forum/upload/204913/0cf7eb24-3340-416d-a530-7584677daa8d/image.png
Fuck off banggood, I can't tell when the one I already have breaks and my plant really like it :<
My English is going to shit. At least my written English, spoken and reading is still fine.
No idea why that is, my other languages are fine and I use English about as much as my native language.
Whenever you make a post about a game running like lagtastic garbage, there's always these type of unwanted posts that appear:
"Well my game runs fine soooooo sucks for everyone else. Just wanted to tell everyone that! =)"
"ur pc sukcs, get better one. there, problm solvved."
"Have you tried restarting?"
(Computer illiterate person) "Uhhhhhh try changing anisotropic filtering from x8 to x16 so it fixes the framerate yeah that'll prob work good luck!!"
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.
Shit that makes you mad V. I hate the post limit
