https://static1.fjcdn.com/comments/Gt17+welcome+welcome+to+city+17+_343678d44b227a4081cd157f32fb8d94.jpg
I've come to make an announcement, Gordon Freeman is a bitch ass motherfucker. He pissed on Dr. Mossman. That's right, he took his HEV suited mute dick out and he pissed on fucking Dr. Mossman and he said his dick was "THIS BIG" and I said "That's disgusting." so I'm making a call-out post on my Twitter dot com, Dr. Freeman, you got a small dick, it's the size of this Antlion Pheropod except way smaller, and guess what? Here's what my dong looks like!
PFFFOOMMM
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/39/09/ef/3909ef1deefa71dfa54f57fa3079f688.jpg
That's right baby, all points, no crowbars, no free will, look at that it looks like two balls and a bong! He fucked Judith Mossman, so guess what? I'm gonna fuck the Earth! That's right, this is what you get: My PORTAL STORM PISS!
https://media.moddb.com/images/articles/1/56/55566/auto/PortalStorm.jpg
Except I'm not gonna piss on the Earth. I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on THE COMBINE DYSON SPHERE!
http://en.es-static.us/upl/2013/05/dyson-sphere-artist.jpeg
How do you like that Dr. Vance?! I PISSED ON THE DYSON SPHERE YOU IDIOT! You have 23 hours until the piss droplets hit the fucking Earth, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too!