• Facepunch Anonymous Confessional: Revengeance
    390 replies, posted
We are all slowly dying in here. That aside, it is a good question.
This isnt exactly titled "Shit you want to throw at mods for good or bad. " C'mon I wanna see some anyonomus dirty laundry
The 'problem' with confessions is that typically people throw out their wildest ones first, or after other people have led the way by doing so themselves, so then by the time people consider confessing for the second/third (etc.) time, it is no longer "lowkey i find my sister hot" or anything juicy, but instead becomes mundane and banal like "One time I did something remotely sexual, aren't I so wild" / they just confess opinions that are too unpopular for the unpopular opinions thread. Unless y'all are living lives straight out of fictive literature and aren't admitting to it.
Yeah but until that happens I'd like to see the juice.
Hope this thread survives. I've followed this since v1 and it's always been my favorite thread series, and I think the boring confessions are important as they make the wild confessions even more exciting. The google form is a great idea as it makes it much easier to send something in than the old email address. I'll try to contribute. It'll probably not be great, but I'll do my part. Atomic, I hope you can find the energy needed to continue. It's not a problem if it takes some time.
I searched for "enema" in the email account and came up with these; Once when I was a kid, I was at my friends house sitting in his hot tub, and he went to go check his email and make dinner, so he would be gone for a while. I decided to take that moment to take my swim trunks off so I was naked, and it felt good! Well there was this big jet that was in the middle of the bottom of the tub that shot a powerful jet of water straight up. Me stupidly not thinking anything about it went to the other side of the tub and while crossing, the jet shot water straight up my bum. It was my first (and last to this date) enema. I moved off it and while writhing in pain/pleasure, I shat in the tub. Some of it got sucked into the intake valve, but I was able to pick up most of it and chuck it onto his yard, so he would think his dogs did it. He never found out, and some of it was still left in there when I got out. I want to get laid by a girl who's into Anal.. I have an unhealthy obession with womens derriere.. like Tits to me are 2nd best.. A nice ass = a nice girl.. unless she's unfortunate with a bulldog face and a nice ass. I want to try anal.. but I'm afraid to first off ask the girl if she's into it and 2nd. to get one of them enema clensing things so I don't get a shit-dick or anything.. Even if I used a condom.. I sometimes use the shower nozzle to clean myself after taking a shit. The water blasting onto my asshole really cleans it thoroughly. There was this one time when the force of the water was too strong, and some water entered my ass. A bit like a mini enema, if you will. It surprised me a little, and I involuntarily pushed. Come shit came squirting out, and a good small lump splatted onto the shower nozzle. Now, I made this confession not because of this act, but because I didn't clean the nozzel, and that small lump of shit has been there even since and no one noticed it at all. It's been there for over three months now. Oh well. It's a small price to pay to have an ultra-clean asshole.
Why the fuck would you not clean up that shit
Oh christ, a copper got a hold of all our confessions God help us all
oh no
I remember all of those! Good times.
No wonder this thread got derailed. People keep bringing up some totally unrelated stuff about shit and some weird sexual shit.
I sometimes use the shower nozzle to clean myself after taking a shit. The water blasting onto my asshole really cleans it thoroughly. Honestly, this is pretty good. Most households in Italy have a "Bidet" which acts as a small washbasin which suits well for sitting on it and cleaning your genitals and asshole. It is easy to use and healthy. Most italians are accustomed to it and I think it should be more popular in other nations. I frequently used it after taking a massive shit or after sex. It is also useful for woman during period. After spending an extensive amount in Italy, I sincerely missed it at home. So I just sit on the edge of the bath tub with my gf, clesning our private parts with the nozzle. A poor substitue but much better than relying solely on asspaper.
Many people might feel awkward, it is not that intuitive to spray your ass after each shit. My secret advice are baby wipes, for that lovely smell.
Baby wipes are disastrous for the environment and the water infrastructure. Stick to bidets/shower nozzles.
So what's the go, @AtomicSans ? I'm fiending for some facepunch goss. I'm gonna assume you're busy or under some stress or something, and I don't think anyone would be super upset if these confessions were put on hold for a bit, but I couldn't find any mention on whether or not that's actually the case. If you're taking a break I look forward to the return - this thread has been a breath of fresh air after the whole 'facepunch is gonna die' dilemma.
Damn, I was not even aware of that. Thanks for sharing, gonna look it up.
@Hezzy That last one was exactly the one I was looking for, reading that confession changed my life though I am still afraid of going full blast to this day.
Most of them are not flushable, and the ones that are, don't even clear properly in great deal of waste disposal infrastructures.
I fiddled around some more and I seem to have mis diagnosed the issue. When I change page in an image intensive thread I'm teleported to the top of the same page and can scroll down a few posts before it changes to the new pages and teleports me to the top again. It's a minor issue but I'm not gonna say it doesn't bother me.
Craziest confession yet
Remotely sexual Oh guess I'm totally okay then
I’ll give it a little benefit of the doubt before that atleast
Cluckmoo lmao
Any updates?
The OP is banned right now.
OP gave up anyway.
No, I haven't. I feel a lot better and I'm going to keep doing it. I wanted to post yesterday but I was banned.
That's it, lads. I can't believe AtomicSans is fucking DEAD jk, it's good to see you back
Yo, fuck yeah glad you are feeling up to this again and feeling better. You helped me out quite a lot, and if there's a chance to help others, dang right that's good.
Have a diamond my friend.
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