• Facepunch Anonymous Confessional: Revengeance
    390 replies, posted
Stop flaunting that homeo erotic CRAP.
who's the real homophones? hmm???
I started the dang thread, so it was from the start. I hate my body. So I have a nightly routine of stripping, heading to bathroom, starting the water and then taking a shit before I shower. The other night, I was running low on time so I stripped early and then ran down to throw my laundry in the dryer. I should've realized this was a mistake because I had to compress my ass cheeks to stop it from coming out early. It worked so I got clothes in the dryer and ran up stairs. I get half way up and my ass tries again. Hold it back, grab my towels and run into the bathroom. I GOT THIS. Yeah? I just gotta turn on the water and then it hit hard. I prepared though, tiolet seat was up. Water was started and as I sit down it goes out. Only for me to realize half hit the seat. I flushed what little dignity and time I had cleaning up. I hate my body. See, your issue is that you went for the amateurish "ass compression" technique when you should have just popped a plug in. I listen to XXXTentacion and Lil Pump throughout the day. But I hide it, I work in office and I listen to it everyday, I once didn't notice the earphone cable isnt plugged in and blasted Lil Pump - ION across the entire office for few seconds.. On facepunch I always go along with their hate-wagon because if you say "XX or Lil Pump are wesome" - you will most likely sink in boxes. :/ I'm certain that the vast majority of people care a lot less than you're thinking they do. So uh, yeah I dunno how to really word this without sounding kinda lame, but like, I am a dude, always felt that wasn't wrong, but at the same time, I think about how it'd be if I was a gal, like more than your typical person's wondering of being the other gender. No dysphoria, plus I actually kinda really like my body as it is. But the idea of being female also is just like, super appealing to me, and I dunno what that is, if it's any sort of case of me being trans, or if it's just me loving ladies, and like, something relating to that instead, cause yeah I sure fuckin do love women, let's be real they are great. And well you seem to have some good insight on these things, so your opinion would be pretty great, and of course any other facepunchers can chime in if they wanna. I just don't want this to end up being a thing where I am just some creepy dude who thinks about chicks too much, even if it's hardly sexual most the time. And to add to that, I do make characters and it's a whole thing, but why I bring it up is, I default to making my characters female, with a very small subset of them male. And when I play Skyrim or any sort of game with customization, yep female. I know that's not too rare among dudes, but like, I don't do it for the tiddy or the booty. I just really would hate to end up being some transtrender asshole that really hurts the community if my lack of dysphoria makes it so I can't really be trans, cause I honestly really, really do not hate my body or being male, I just think female might suit me more? If that makes sense with the whole no dysphoria thing. Hell I've even always had female names I'd go by, and that goes back to like, 9th grade or so, and I've been out of school roughly 10 years. But yeah once again is that just me thinking about alternate realities too much or what? Kinda rambled there, whoops. But yeah like I said, you seem very wise on these matters, and I know facepunch has some other dudes and dudettes also in the know. Well if you're genuinely curious, it's worth it to explore a little. Seems like you've tried presenting female online and you were comfortable with it. Have you tried wearing female clothes? Give it a try if you can. Maybe borrow some from an understanding friend, or buy some cheap crap from a thrift store. If it feels good, well... then it feels good. Try out feminine experiences and see how they feel. That's the only way to know, really. And don't worry about being a transtrender or any of that shit. I hate that word, it's terrible, and only serves to plant doubt into well-meaning people. Unless you start spreading anti-trans rhetoric, which doesn't seem like your intention, you aren't hurting us. The trans community is, in general, very accepting of people questioning their gender and exploring themselves... since that's how we all started off ourselves. Transness isn't defined by your suffering. If you're okay how you are now, but being a girl would make you happier, then you have every right to become a girl and be seen as one. Good luck, wherever you go and whoever you choose to be. 💜 Please @ arbalète https://forum.facepunch.com/u/jcix/arbal-te/ as this is a response to their questions from page 4 in the thread, and for the other users that shared their curiosity. Thank you! (Sorry this is so long!!!) Person who loves a fictional character here, just addressing some questions and general curiosity somebody had. I won't say who the character is, gender, or even what medium, as I fear incriminating myself or worse yet somebody else of this. It may be harmless but it is certainly not normal, and I would not be surprised if it drew ire. I admit I feel bad assuming the worst of people but you can never be certain with the internet. Hopefully you understand where I'm coming from. I'd love to tell you who it is but I am a paranoid person. On the whole dating the character, I don't indulge myself in anything like that. I try to avoid using the character as a means of escapism (more on that later). I'm also a bit of a believer in just trying to ensure that the spirit of the character remains true to what they were originally. I also just can't help but feel like I've hit rock bottom if I do any of the dating sort of things. I do know some people do this, though. As for merchandise, yes I have bought some. Again, I try to keep the spirit of the character true to what it originally was so I tend to only go for things that properly represent what the character is, but I'd be lying if I said I'm not considering going back on my principles just to be a bit closer to the character. I'm not big on the idea of compromising my own beliefs, but I'm not sure which would do me more harm: being completely separated from this character I love for my entire life, or going against what I believe. Tough call. Your bit about "wallow in a void when they become enamored with a 2D like some sort of narcissus" is spot on when it comes to most. Typically this happens to the people who love a character in an attempt to fulfill social needs, rather than a love and yearn for someone amazing. Years ago I was in a fan group for a work, and many people claimed to genuinely love characters from the work. These same people were very depressed, and many would obsess over these characters, ignoring trying to better themselves or make real friends who can provide for their social needs. Three things happened to this group: Some realized their love was hollow, a fake character cannot provide for their social needs and they care not for the character, and they left. Some people like myself got ostracized for not following the escapism trend, and left. Lastly, some people refused to let go and never realized loving a fictional character isn't a way to satisfy their social needs and became very delusional and stayed. I hope they got through their depression, I fear with how fast they fell apart in the span of a couple months, what could have happened in the course of years could be far worse. This is why I personally avoid any forms of escapism involving this character besides just the occasional admiration of a picture or thinking about their quirks or a fun little extrapolation of personality. I've seen where it can go, and I would not call myself mentally stable enough to avoid slipping back into a rut. I guess it also doesn't help I'm scared that if I ever spend too long realizing just how likely it is I'll never actually be with this character, I'll just completely break down. Writing that sentence alone kind of screwed me up. I guess that goes to show just how few real motivations life has provided beyond my friends, family, and this character. I can't describe how this character motivates me without possibly identifying who they are through describing a character trait, but I can at least try to describe how I view the whole thing. I've got my whole life ahead of me, and this character won't truly be there the whole time. I may as well take this time to better myself, enjoy this life, find my passions, perfect what I do, and grow as a person. This life will be more enjoyable, and if at the end of the road I get to be with the character, I'll have a few decades of personal growth under my belt, so I can hopefully be just as perfect for them as they are for me! As for loving somebody in real life, who knows. People change, maybe I'll love somebody real someday. Maybe somebody will love me. It'd be a bit hard to part with something as perfect as this character who's made me smile countless times. I honestly have no idea what would happen. I wouldn't want to harm anybody real in any way, especially by pushing them away over a fictional character, but sometimes a "me first" policy is just how it has to be. Am I crazy? Probably. Is this healthy? Probably not. But really, I feel the motivation for personal growth is kind of irrelevant, and this character is one of the few things that keeps me going, and I'm not going to abandon them. Hopefully this answers most of the questions people may have had. I could keep going, but I'd rather not make this any longer. Sorry for that. @arbalète Looks like your questions have been answered. And sorry for the lateness, I should probably fast-track these kinds of anonymous responses. In a way I find this kind of touching and sweet. I think you're probably handling it in a relatively healthy way, while acknowledging that most people who have similar fictional romances don't live healthily.
For the person who is currently questioning in whether they want to be a girl or not; Being transgender is largely a spectrum more than anything. Some people have very very mild cases of dysphoria and are perfectly fine just going about their whole life as their assigned gender, with only very minor symptoms. Others can have more severe cases; suffering from dysphoria induced depression most of their life, even after a near complete transition. Most lie somewhere in the middle. If you want to dress up like the opposite sex (in your case, as a girl), by all means, do it! See if you enjoy yourself more and consider from there. There are plenty of resources out there to just start looking into it. There is no 'right way' to being transgender. You could always go to a doctor/therapist ( I legitimately don't know which one you'd want to go to, someone else chime in pls ) and see if they can help you figure things out. There is nothing wrong with experimenting with yourself presenting as the opposite gender.
Unless they report what you said to the local police and you have to flee your home country to start a new life in america
@fictional char person - that was a really great reply and i'm happy i got to hear more about it. i wish the best of luck to you on your journey dealing with all of this. i'm really glad you're able to enjoy fiction with that sort of self-awareness, i think it's really good. i hope you can live the best life you're capable of so that whoever that character is would be proud of you. 🙏 thanks for the response.
@AtomicSans there is one confession/post submitted about upcoming job interview (Super fucking long post). Please ignore that and don't post it, no point in posting it as I already had interview and already got job tl;dr - it was just a question about interview looking for advice, with lots of details.
I saw that one, I'd considered not posting it since it was fuckhuge and not a confession. But I'm glad you got the job, it must have weighed heavily on you.
Person who made a fleshlight Just go buy one. The stigma behind male sex toys is fucking stupid. What's really pathetic is all those plebs jerking off using their hands meanwhile I've moved from using my mouth to some anime chick's butt sculpted by some poor underpaid factory worker. There's plenty of crazy ones if you look up Onaholes from japan; lots of options.
Thanks for the thread @AtomicSans . Never read any of the previous ones and I see how I missed out. I like your commentary. It's your thread so don't let anyone else tell you how to run it. Fuck the haters.
I don't know how much this would un-anonymize things but I wouldn't mind some form of vague timestamp sometimes, to see how far the backlog goes.
Funny, because they complain about they way he comments and I'm sure most of the people who submit their confessions do it in a way because of atomics responses, yet some complain about it. If you don't like it, ignore it, move on and don't submit any confession lol, everyone else who submitted something knew they were going to get a response from them.
The fact Crap "How's it hanging" Tasket and Transphobe Sosig are still mods on KO is really sad, tbh. Knockout is a joke and will fail so hard. Wait, really? That's kinda unfortunate. Why do people even get just randomly modded? It should be a new place with new staff.
Why was Sosig modded?
sosig was made mod due to needing someone to wrangle the rust crowd after Tlean left the moderation team
To be fair, I don't think many people would mind so much if it was on a level playing field. The problem where hypocrisy/the playing field slanting plays in is situations such as the times people got banned for calling out Craptasket on his "how's it hanging" comments on a dead user's profile while the guy himself remained unfettered. If you check the rules it even states in a self-aware tone Moderators Are Never Wrong™ - We are beyond criticism and are the best. Moderators have green usernames; you should do as they say.
New submissions are trickling in at a very low rate. The current backlog is 104 submissions. So far I've gone through 161 submissions, including duplicate submissions, submissions I've declined to post, and posts filtered out by my friend. So the real number of submissions I've actually posted so far is likely closer to 145.
i sure hope you're not lactose intolerant
For a grand total of 1 and 1/4 pounds
heyo @AtomicSans was it me or did you upload the latest confessions later than usual? I remember checking em at like 2AM in local time and they werent there but i saw em in daytime
wasn't just you, i posted them pretty late
was it a one off or they're gonna get posted late now?
I dunno. I'm working on a post right now but in general I just post them whenever I want. Sometimes I skip a day for no reason in particular. I don't have a schedule and I don't particularly feel a need for one.
My first ever girlfriend was extensively emotionally abusive, constantly needing my validation for her body dysmorphia while also tearing me down in regards to my academic results, my appearance, and my lack of aggression and "being a man" . She tried to gaslight me into thinking I was abusive when I stood up to her or tried to talk about my problems with any of this, and subsequently cheated on me and we broke up. She tried to hover around me for months but I cut her out of my life as much as possible. It really destroyed my trust and messed me up. Years later and I'm doing a lot better, in a great long term relationship, and I hear she is spreading rumors to people in my field that I was extremely abusive beyond even what she tried to gaslight me with. I don't know what to do, my progress in trying to become more mentally healthy suddenly began slipping just as it began to get better, and people will probably believe her and think I'm a fucking monster. I don't know why she is doing this to me. She sounds like she has BPD. And let me tell you something about BPD. Don't try and make sense of it. Just don't. I pissed away a lot of time trying to be empathetic to my own ex who had it, try have rational conversations, even get an answer as to why she did what she did. All I got back in return was an assload of regret and losing a fuckton of energy trying to make sense of it. She still keeps tabs on me. I just stopped caring. Just straight up out the gate tell your coworkers that she's got a personality disorder and to not even give her the time of day. It's doubly fun if she doesn't know because she'll double down on not believing it just to prove you wrong and never get the help she needs. The best way to get back at her is to just live a good life, never interact with her, don't even react to her shit. She'll ruin her own life obsessing over trying to ruin yours.
My first ever girlfriend was extensively emotionally abusive, constantly needing my validation for her body dysmorphia while also tearing me down in regards to my academic results, my appearance, and my lack of aggression and "being a man" . She tried to gaslight me into thinking I was abusive when I stood up to her or tried to talk about my problems with any of this, and subsequently cheated on me and we broke up. She tried to hover around me for months but I cut her out of my life as much as possible. It really destroyed my trust and messed me up. Years later and I'm doing a lot better, in a great long term relationship, and I hear she is spreading rumors to people in my field that I was extremely abusive beyond even what she tried to gaslight me with. I don't know what to do, my progress in trying to become more mentally healthy suddenly began slipping just as it began to get better, and people will probably believe her and think I'm a fucking monster. I don't know why she is doing this to me. I've been through a similar situation, and don't even try to bargain with her. People like that are manipulators, plain and simple. Regardless of what mental illnesses she may or may not have, she has to take responsibility of her own shitty actions.
It's not even CBT piss inflation. dear god I hope art of that doesn't exist That 100% exists. I've never seen it but I can confidently say it exists and it's most likely worse than you could imagine. I've seen literal shitting dick nipples (actually posted here a couple of times in the edgier days), I don't think anything you imagine isn't already somewhere on the internet. When it's fucked up and porn related, anyway. Also related to that particular confession I've been considering learning to draw with the main motivation being to draw porn, but mainly because when I look for porn I'm seeing more and more extreme shit (by my standards) and I just want to see wholesome shit like cuddling and handholding. Like half the doujins that have decent art these days seem to involve cheating, rape, fat/old ugly men, or straight up death. I am not down for any of that shit.
reddit has some good wholesome hentai/doujin commmunities tbh. lots of hndholding n shit
psst may i be directed to this handholding
Wait Sosig is Transphobic?
if you have a backlog don't hesitate to send a few interesting ones to me on discord and i'll do some commentary
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