There is a room, full of broken things, a dead body, and a ticking clock.
What does not tick?
The dead guy's heart. Hurrr.
Three men were vacationing in Saudi Arabia and during their vacation they found a large tent. Inside were a very large group of women. The men started getting 'friendly' with the women when suddenly A man and two bodyguards walked in the tent. The man said "I am the master of these women, mo one is allowed to touch them but me! Each of you must be punished in a way that corresponds to your profession." he turns to the first vacationer and says "What do you do for a living?"
The vacationer says "I'm a cop."
"Then we will shoot your penis off." said the man, and one of the bodyguards did just that.
He turns to the second vacationer and asks the same question.
The Second Vacationer says "I'm a fireman."
"Then we shall burn your penis off." said the man, and one of the bodyguards did just that.
The man turns to the last vacationer and says "And you, what do you do for a
living?"
The vacationer gives the man a sly grin and says "I'm a lolipop salesman."
What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord?
I dunno, but this thread sucks ass.
Two muffins sitting in a oven. One muffin looks over to the other and says "Its getting hot in here"
The other looks over and yells [sp]HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN[/sp]
I just beat you all. My thread now.
Once apon a time I went into a bar.
...
[URL=http://img14.imageshack.us/i/thatsthejoker.jpg/][IMG]http://img14.imageshack.us/img14/5986/thatsthejoker.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
While these kids argue, lets look at my beautiful GIF!
[URL=http://www.gifsoup.com/view/416018/yeah.html][IMG]http://www.gifsoup.com/imager.php?id=416018[/IMG][/URL]
[img]http://taitk.com/other/Facepalm.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Inafinus :3;21652653]A bad joke is often better than none.[/QUOTE]
Disagree.
A New York lawyer went duck hunting in eastern North Carolina. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an older man asked him what he was doing. The lawyer responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, I'm going to retrieve it."
The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."
The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything!
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things here in North Carolina. We settle small disagreements like this with the NC Three-Kick Rule."
The lawyer asked, "What is the NC three-Kick Rule?"
The Farmer replied. "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."
The New York attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old southerner. He agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His next too kicks caused the lawyer so much pain that he just about gave up. However, the New York lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old redneck southerner, now it's my turn."
The old North Carolina farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck."
This thread is not about your jokes but me. BE GONE WITH YOU!
I read through this again and I lol'd.
You all and Garry are gay
[editline]07:30PM[/editline]
Especially Garry
[QUOTE=Inafinus :3;21652417]What kind of phone does Garry use?
A Blackgarry.
I am so funny.[/QUOTE]
[url]http://www.instantrimshot.com[/url]
[QUOTE=gtanoofa;21652480]What dumbasses do when they try to be funny ?
Making a thread.[/QUOTE]
or in this case replies
Funny
[QUOTE=Inafinus :3;21691272]This thread is not about your jokes but me. BE GONE WITH YOU![/QUOTE]
Why did you revive this shit. The gods are angry with you!!
Three tampons are walking down the street, which one says hi to you?
none, they are all stuck up bitches
WOW! That was a total waste of time :( i actually thought you'd have something there dude!
....The fuck is going on here? The OP being a little bitch-poster, along with quite a few others. This isn't a very good thread overall, I have to say.
A guy walks into a bar and says "ouch".
out dated jokes ftw.
[QUOTE=DaAngryWeasel;22201962]....The fuck is going on here? The OP being a little bitch-poster, along with quite a few others. This isn't a very good thread overall, I have to say.[/QUOTE]
Says the one who shitposts 24/7
I read through this again and its still funny to me. Ignore the Joke, it was supposed to be shitty but just reading through the thread is fucking hilarious, to me anyway.
justin biebers balls
[QUOTE=SilverDragon619;23404899]justin biebers balls[/QUOTE]
what balls?
Puns such as this are not worthy of a thread, they should be said in complete prose, for you should not expect a laugh from a regular person.
[QUOTE=Inafinus :3;22201010]Funny[/QUOTE]
You ruined what was potentially a funny thread.
