Shit You'd Like to Confess V3 I'm not into incest but my sister is hot - General

[QUOTE=Unique_mask;49753910]The only form of media that makes me cry is music, I don't know why, but it does.[/QUOTE] I'm the exact opposite. Sometimes I cry to commercials.

Oh shit a new thread here's some confessions. If you know me and don't want to feel uncomfortable here's the chance to skip. I have genuinely masturbated to planes. Not to anthropomorphized planes, not to refueling or maintenance erotica that tries to make everyday operations erotic (yes, these exist), just pictures of fighter jets. My favourite ones were the YF-23 (dat ass holy shit) and F-15C (those gentle bumps on top of the fuselage, hnnngh). Not F-15E though, I'm not into hambeasts. Never done it to Russian jets (they feel mean and predatory) but I admire the Su-47 from a purely aesthetic point of view. It's my favorite plane and I'd never be able to jerk to it, it'd be like jerking to your waifu. Too pure to defile. Eurocanards don't do it either for me, Typhoon's intakes are too blocky and fapping to the Rafale would be like fapping to little kids. It's not right. I wouldn't say it's a fetish or anything, I haven't done it in years. Those hormone filled teenage years can get you to do odd stuff. Since I'm at this topic I might as well make it clear that I'm into girls and (some) dudes. I'm not really open about it on the Internet and no one knows in real life because it's none of their business. In an optimal scenario my parents would meet the person I'd be dating if we were about to get kids (I must have suffered some concussion or brain damage to want to have kids in the first place). What else? I like the way I smell unless I've been stewing in it for weeks. I guess this isn't that weird unless there's people who don't like the way their dick smells? I've done butt stuff. Is anyone even surprised at this point? Didn't really get anything out of it, probably did it wrong. Might try again but not in my present situation. I've forgotten how to people make friends. Everyone I know online approached me, never the other way around. There's been one or two times people have tried to get to know me in real life in the last ~10 friendless years of my life. I don't know how I fucked up, I don't recall acting super autistic or anything. Never had a crush on anyone. No attraction beyond "yeah they're p hot" either. I have real trouble sympathising with people. It used to be that I couldn't really understand why family members would cry etc. Always been easier with animals. I've managed to extend my "sphere of caring" to people I haven't even met though. Slowly getting there I guess. To end on a higher note, as a kid I sometimes heard these noises inside the back of my skull. Kinda like scrunching, stretching and dry grinding. I used to hit myself in the head until it stopped. Later I figured that it was probably ligaments and bones making this sound and I was just really sensitive to it.

[QUOTE=Zezibesh;49755932]My favourite ones were the YF-23 (dat ass holy shit).[/QUOTE] [T]https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/db/YF-23_exhaust.jpg[/T] what

[QUOTE=Exooodus;49755498]The word "bitch" sounds more comical than insulting.[/QUOTE] Same goes for the n-word to me (I'm half so no worries) But that's because of the way I got raised and the fact that I had all boondocks episodes on disc [video=youtube;BjumUKsToJQ]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjumUKsToJQ[/video]

[QUOTE=Zezibesh;49755932]Oh shit a new thread here's some confessions. If you know me and don't want to feel uncomfortable here's the chance to skip. I have genuinely masturbated to planes. Not to anthropomorphized planes, not to refueling or maintenance erotica that tries to make everyday operations erotic (yes, these exist), just pictures of fighter jets. My favourite ones were the YF-23 (dat ass holy shit) and F-15C (those gentle bumps on top of the fuselage, hnnngh). Not F-15E though, I'm not into hambeasts. Never done it to Russian jets (they feel mean and predatory) but I admire the Su-47 from a purely aesthetic point of view. It's my favorite plane and I'd never be able to jerk to it, it'd be like jerking to your waifu. Too pure to defile. Eurocanards don't do it either for me, Typhoon's intakes are too blocky and fapping to the Rafale would be like fapping to little kids. It's not right. I wouldn't say it's a fetish or anything, I haven't done it in years. Those hormone filled teenage years can get you to do odd stuff.[/QUOTE] [url=http://i.imgur.com/ogot5.jpg]I think I can recommend this for you.[/url]

[QUOTE=Exooodus;49755498]The word "bitch" sounds more comical than insulting.[/QUOTE] I think twat and cunt are more humorous.

British english overall is hilarious.

[QUOTE=Drury;49756178]British english overall is hilarious.[/QUOTE] What're ye talking 'bout ya skellywag? [sp]I have my facebook on pirate english and I wont ever change it back[/sp]

Scottish english best [media]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXhKVA7UStY[/media] I can ballpark the general message but...

[QUOTE=Drury;49756178]British english overall is hilarious.[/QUOTE] i'll have ya fookin' kno' ya fookin' wanka i'll fookin' deck ya teeth in innit mate ye? fookin' think i'm a fookin' clown ye mate ye? fook you!

[QUOTE=NightmareX91;49756233]i'll have ya fookin' kno' ya fookin' wanka i'll fookin' deck ya teeth in innit mate ye? fookin' think i'm a fookin' clown ye mate ye? fook you![/QUOTE] Poppycock.

Sometimes I wish I was born mute so I would have legit reason why I don't want to speak.

[QUOTE=Zezibesh;49755932]Oh shit a new thread here's some confessions. If you know me and don't want to feel uncomfortable here's the chance to skip. I have genuinely masturbated to planes. Not to anthropomorphized planes, not to refueling or maintenance erotica that tries to make everyday operations erotic (yes, these exist), just pictures of fighter jets. My favourite ones were the YF-23 (dat ass holy shit) and F-15C (those gentle bumps on top of the fuselage, hnnngh). Not F-15E though, I'm not into hambeasts. Never done it to Russian jets (they feel mean and predatory) but I admire the Su-47 from a purely aesthetic point of view. It's my favorite plane and I'd never be able to jerk to it, it'd be like jerking to your waifu. Too pure to defile. Eurocanards don't do it either for me, Typhoon's intakes are too blocky and fapping to the Rafale would be like fapping to little kids. It's not right. I wouldn't say it's a fetish or anything, I haven't done it in years. Those hormone filled teenage years can get you to do odd stuff. Since I'm at this topic I might as well make it clear that I'm into girls and (some) dudes. I'm not really open about it on the Internet and no one knows in real life because it's none of their business. In an optimal scenario my parents would meet the person I'd be dating if we were about to get kids (I must have suffered some concussion or brain damage to want to have kids in the first place). What else? I like the way I smell unless I've been stewing in it for weeks. I guess this isn't that weird unless there's people who don't like the way their dick smells? I've done butt stuff. Is anyone even surprised at this point? Didn't really get anything out of it, probably did it wrong. Might try again but not in my present situation. I've forgotten how to people make friends. Everyone I know online approached me, never the other way around. There's been one or two times people have tried to get to know me in real life in the last ~10 friendless years of my life. I don't know how I fucked up, I don't recall acting super autistic or anything. Never had a crush on anyone. No attraction beyond "yeah they're p hot" either. I have real trouble sympathising with people. It used to be that I couldn't really understand why family members would cry etc. Always been easier with animals. I've managed to extend my "sphere of caring" to people I haven't even met though. Slowly getting there I guess. To end on a higher note, as a kid I sometimes heard these noises inside the back of my skull. Kinda like scrunching, stretching and dry grinding. I used to hit myself in the head until it stopped. Later I figured that it was probably ligaments and bones making this sound and I was just really sensitive to it.[/QUOTE] jesus fucking christ I wish we could still buy other people titles

Guys, I know it's funny that he jerked it to a plane but also please remember the thread we are in.

[QUOTE=AtomicSans;49756512]jesus fucking christ I wish we could still buy other people titles[/QUOTE] But does it beat the Lasagna Story?

[QUOTE=skylortrexle;49756535]Guys, I know it's funny that he jerked it to a plane but also please remember the thread we are in.[/QUOTE]"Ask me about my jet fighter fetish" alright, it's out of my system, I'm done joking. Actual content: Once I drew a nekkid girl and then masturbated to it. Then I threw the drawing away in shame. Too bad, too, it was a really good drawing. I easily spent a good couple hours on it.

[QUOTE=Stonecycle;49756538]But does it beat the Lasagna Story?[/QUOTE] Uhh, context for the ones that dont know this?

[QUOTE=Fox Powers;49756553]Uhh, context for the ones that dont know this?[/QUOTE] Can't seem to find it since it's buried deep in one of the other confession threads and it's not showing up in the search, but long story short some guy pretended to stick it in some lasagna at a friend's house then later actually stuck it in some leftovers on his way home and finished.

okay remember how I said to remember the thread we are in? Fuck that. That dude fucked a lasagna. It's fine to jerk it to whatever you want but to actually go and [I]fuck a lasagna[/I]

Holy fuck I bet that was a perfectly good lasagna

in france it's tradition to fuck lasagnas

I find it hard to take Icelandic names seriously since some of them are basically Kierkeneirken Varginargin at times

[QUOTE=Zillamaster55;49757069]I find it hard to take Icelandic names seriously since some of them are basically Kierkeneirken Varginargin at times[/QUOTE] Hahaha me and my partner were talking about this last night!

[QUOTE=Vodkavia;49758283]I lost a friend today, turns out they kinda hated me for a long time but couldn't bring themselves to say it until today. My social isolation is reaching critical levels :s:[/QUOTE] Did they say why? How old are they?

[QUOTE=EuSKalduna;49755202]I think sobotnik is going to want to have a word with you[/QUOTE] Yes I am listening

[QUOTE=Vodkavia;49758324]TBH we never had much of a common thread to begin with, over time he just didn't like me or anything I had to say. It wouldn't be so tragic if I didn't[B] lose all of my friends after highschool (People moved away and everyone who didn't leave is split by drama) [/B]so right now im about as popular as grape soda. I had so many friends, maybe an unusual amount and we did so much crazy fun stuff now I just trudge every day in college just kind of marinating in my own angst[/QUOTE] This happens to literally everyone. I know that doesn't make it better or anything but at least you know that it's not your fault.

[QUOTE=Vodkavia;49758324]TBH we never had much of a common thread to begin with, over time he just didn't like me or anything I had to say. It wouldn't be so tragic if I didn't lose all of my friends after highschool (People moved away and everyone who didn't leave is split by drama) so right now im about as popular as grape soda. I had so many friends, maybe an unusual amount and we did so much crazy fun stuff now I just trudge every day in college just kind of marinating in my own angst[/QUOTE] Yeah. mate, this happens. It sucks but it happens. I have my 2 best mates left, and thats it. And even then i talk to them about once every 2 weeks and see them once every other month maybe. They are brothers so they have fun together and they only live half hour away but its just annoying because i feel left out compared to them. But like i said. It happens and it sucks. You need to make more mature friends if its like that. Also you need to know internet friends are friends too.

Fucking hell. And heres me complaining about my friends not talking to me. I have no reason to be annoyed.

as a kid i accidentally broke shit at my parent's friends houses all the time and i never got caught. it used to happen so often, i'd just be playing with a robotic santa or whatever and accidentally brake its arm off and just stash it away and hope we left soon.

When i was younger, i used to steal money if it was left on the side no-matter where i was, and once i stole a £20 note from a friend of a friends house party and yet for some stupid reason i justified it by saying "They obviously don't care about money if they leave it laying around" Im a bad person