Shit You'd Like to Confess V3 I'm not into incest but my sister is hot - General

I just bought lube at Wal-Mart and felt really nervous the whole time. There weren't any baskets to hide it in and the security camera warnings everywhere made it worse.

Violin music gets to me in a weird way. In two happy scenes I nearly cried because of the violin then in a sad scene I didn't despite it actually being sad and there being [I]sad[/I] violin.

[QUOTE=FunnyStarRunner;50115467]I just bought lube at Wal-Mart and felt really nervous the whole time. There weren't any baskets to hide it in and the security camera warnings everywhere made it worse.[/QUOTE] Well the good news is that since its Walmart, you probably weren't the weirdest one there. :v: I bought some Blu-rays and blank VHS's at Walmart a couple years ago. Now that's weird.

[QUOTE=Demache;50115493]Well the good news is that since its Walmart, you probably weren't the weirdest one there. :v: I bought some Blu-rays and blank VHS's at Walmart a couple years ago. Now that's weird.[/QUOTE] I could've bought a Minion plush with the lube and a box cutter in his pouch so I would blend in with the natives.

I like being poetic and speaking in metaphors when possible

its weird because i dont want to die but being alive feels exhausting and i just want to lay down somewhere and stop existing

[QUOTE=FunnyStarRunner;50115573]I could've bought a Minion plush with the lube and a box cutter in his pouch so I would blend in with the natives.[/QUOTE] This reminds me of one time I've bought vaseline, a six-pack of beer and a pringles can

[QUOTE=Topzombie;50116084]This reminds me of one time I've bought vaseline, a six-pack of beer and a pringles can[/QUOTE] donuts, donut holes and superglue

a bottle of lube and a coat hanger

[QUOTE=AtomicSans;50116332]a bottle of lube and a coat hanger[/QUOTE] lube/condoms is cheating

[QUOTE=Skrappy;50116044]its weird because i dont want to die but being alive feels exhausting and i just want to lay down somewhere and stop existing[/QUOTE] Depression

[QUOTE=skylortrexle;50116393]Depression[/QUOTE] ya ive had it since i was 7 and got improperly medicated and now im stuck w/it forever :-)

[QUOTE=Skrappy;50116392]lube/condoms is cheating[/QUOTE]Fine. Motor oil, a coat hanger and a banana.

Every time I have to take the subway, there's this moment where I have to go upstairs and people walk really close to one another, I actually hate it because people walk slow and I feel like I'm suddenly going slip and then spin as I fall down and push/bring down everyone with me like if they were ragdolls and then I'm going to get arrested for it somehow. It has never happened, but laws of physics suddenly acting weird are one of my biggest fears. The city where I live, despite being okay most of the time, scares me a lot. In the place where I used to work at there are several repair and mod shops around with people in motorcycle making deliveries and moving around the area most of the day. Believe it or not, most places are shady as fuck. If you ever see a guy in a bike telling you to follow him so you can get your car fixed or find a part you're looking for, think twice, most of the time they're driving you into a warehouse with 6 dudes carrying guns and making you pay $50,000 for a side mirror. (happened to someone I know). There is this metro station almost in the center of the city, there's a guy who frequently steals from people who pass through that station and acts real shady overall, he became some kind of meme. There are people who claim to be victims of his stuff, like "This one guy approached me, began talking to me all kindly and then he stole my shit" or "A bunch of dudes almost beat me up because they confused me with this guy who steals from people" and similar. If the bus you're taking is about to go through an overpass or a tunnel, it's a hotspot for groups of muggers who threaten the driver and force all passengers to give their stuff, most of them carry stun guns or shitty pistols that might or not be real.

I can't comprehend how someone could not have experienced depression. Like I don't think my brother would even consider it a legitimate problem since he's never been depressed. I don't think he even knows I take meds to handle it, because without them I literally cannot do anything.

[QUOTE=TheRealRudy;50116632]im a necrophiliac[/QUOTE] Do you keep the lotion on standby when playing Left 4 Dead?

[QUOTE=DJswitch;50113286]So I work the local college IT help desk here at my college, and due to the medicine I take/diseases I have, I've been having to call in a little more frequently than is considered 'normal' due to it. I got a piece of mail highlighting this and my supervisor seems like they're gonna give me a strike over it. My work ethic is out there, and disappointing people like this makes me want to just keel over and die. I try my best to not rely on an 'excuse' like what I have, just so I can be on the same level as other people, but sometimes it takes a hold of me and I simply can't come in at all. It's not like school work where I can make it up later and say everything's A-OK.[/QUOTE] I miss a workday almost weekly on average because I have a lot of problems with the digestive system that have never been pinned down right, and have otherwise put me and my wife into a serious pinch over the years. But, I never 'miss' work. There's so much fucking work to be done that I can never actually stop doing my work, so if I stay home sick (likely tomorrow!) I'm just going to be remoted into my machine via teamviewer or something, puttering around there or on my home machine in order to get things done. In fact, if I stay home, I'm likely to put more than 8 hours in because I feel I need to prove my efforts to the boss. It's 1:40am and I'm fucking photoshopping a project that'll take maybe 2 days to complete, and isn't due for another 10 days, because I need to show my efforts. Despite working, I just get a pressured "you should see a doctor". like yeah I've seen doctors for a decade and a half for this, the last 'hmm I wonder what this is' was wholly inconclusive and "totally covered by my health insurance", but lo and behold the "quick what-if" CT Scan is apparently a $17,000 procedure. Yay 20% copay on [i]that[/i] fucker. Also for other stuff, Anaestheseologists work on their own system and will send you bill after bill after surprise bill for several months as they need to restock the wine cooler on their yacht Because of this constant work at home attitude, I'm never able to do anything for myself, and when I do have free time I zonk out and putz around the forums or in a game for a bit, knowing there's something to be done so I don't quite sleep because I should at least touch up something before tomorrow. because of THAT, I'm destroyed in the morning. I sleep until 8:30 and it takes me over an hour to get to work due to construction traffic. It used to be 2 hours due to a 45 mile one-way drive, and now that I blew my savings and tossed out 3/4ths of everything I own to move to a much closer location just 10 miles away from the office, the entire county decided the main roads need to be destroyed and rebuilt and I've spent much of the winter dealing with single lane alternating traffic in literally every direction. BUT Google maps shows it's a 21 minute drive so you have no excuses :). In both cases too, if I leave before 8-8:30, I'm just crammed into heavier rush-hour traffic and it takes exponentially longer to arrive. From the long distance drive, it could go up to 3 hours if I left at 7, 2 of which were spent in the 10 miles of suburban roads leading up to the highway So, it's now 9:30-10am when I get into work. How's this fly? Because anybody I get a project from usually waits til 11:45 so they can hand it off, go to lunch, and expect it ready for their 1pm meeting, or 4:45, when it's due for an 8am meeting. That's always the thing, and it means I'm puttering around in the morning waiting for work and staying late at the office or staying up til 4am getting a thing [I]done.[/I] I come in late and my work is always an hour or two later than I am. But I still get in trouble for it and often while I'm on the road, at the same time when I'm 5 minutes out from the office, my phone will ding and it's my manager just sending me "ETA???" but there's no actual emergency, she's just being a pest. And despite putting in 70+ hours a week, I get chastised if I put down more than 40 on my timesheet because i'm clearly wasting company time, and chastised for coming in late or working from home despite a base agreement that my workday starts late and an understanding that my home computer is more powerful than my work machine and I'm entirely capable of getting shit done. On top of that, with my home computer I don't have to fight the 130 other employees for one of 80 shared network licences for various software, most of which we think isn't even being used half the time but people leave shit open. I left at lunch [B]today [/B]because I was incapable of opening the program to [i]do my job[/i] and my manager was STILL trying to argue with me over whether or not it was a good idea to go home. [I]I'm going to [B]work[/B][/I], and I'm still fucking here 14 hours later. I don't eat breakfast, I rarely eat lunch, and dinner is often like a bean burrito at taco bell. It's something I've recently made a huge goal to improve and get out of, working toward a more rewarding job that understands human limits and clients who understand my artform isn't just clicking a button for 20 minutes and emailing you back. I have a hunch if I found work at a severely less stressful and more fulfilling job I'd have a lot fewer problems in general, as the whole tired/working late cycle, mixed with my work being consistently being cheaper clients demanding quantity/timing over any semblance of quality, clearly isn't doing my mental health any favors. [editline]e[/editline] [I]I'm not trying to play 'oh my life's worse' one-up on you but damn I wanna say I know your pain[/I], and to an extent I'm grateful because in the very least my bosses, while understanding nothing of what I do and what's happening to me, are understanding enough not to fire me on the spot. It's a dick move to consider giving you a strike if they know you're legitimately ill, and I know you don't want to rely on an excuse as a crutch to keep your standing at work, but it may be better to explain the situation at a base level if you haven't already and maybe come to some relative understanding. A doctor's note could be some solid ground. in the meantime I decided to bite the bullet recently and pay to upgrade my apartment to a bigger one in a better spot in this complex, with 2 bedrooms so I can turn one into an office and do shit from home in a more comfortable and well set up environment instead of being crammed into my livingroom. Plus if I do eventually bail/get dropped for outsourcing nonsense with the JOBjob, I'll be a lot better set up for freelancing (and maybe remotely working with some compatriots who've considered hiring me down the line). Allegedly, even with the huge taxes, I'd only have to work ~20 hours freelancing at my (rather low) rate weekly to completely blast past my current income. The downside of course, is in freelancing finding such consistent work is more than 20 hours of its own work (if you're lucky), and the way taxes and fees are handled is a farce that puts a lot of extra pressure on you as an individual.

I should be working right now, but hey Facepunch is also an alternative i guess :v:

I have daddy issues which i think is the reason why i'm attracted to mature men.

I'm incredibly shy when speaking anonymously, and incredibly candid when speaking personally, and it bothers me. Speaking to a person, a person perhaps I've only known for moments, I can retell and recall any number of personal stories and moments that range from exciting to humiliating. Speaking on a platform, like a blog or even this forum, I find a tremendous struggle to articulate any number of things unless I can find a way to make them nice and impersonal. If I try to say something interesting about myself, I feel like a braggart or an attention whore. If I try to say something kind of humbling, I feel like a weird loser. Hell, I get 'stage fright' using anonymous image boards. This might not seem that frustrating, but it makes me feel incredibly closed off when it seems everyone else is social-media-platforming, or networking and making cool new contacts when they just put themselves out there and pray. Even more so when my current desired career path (writing/editing) seems to become progressively more and more reliant on that sort of thing.

I'm pretty sure If I said most of my opinions about religious issues on SH I'd be a dead man [sp]No, I'm not an atheist[/sp]

considering what is posted on this thread, I doubt it

I've come to realize that so long as you're not a dick about it, you can say pretty much anything on these forums, which is great. There's few left where that applies. [sp]For my confession: I've masturbated so much over the last month that even if I go just two days without doing it, I'll get a real mean case of 'blue balls'. Or at least it hurts down there, like damn.[/sp]

I keep passing by this dead raccoon on the way to school and I'm really tempted to take it's skull to add it to a growing bone collection I have but I don't know how I'd go about doing it [editline]12th April 2016[/editline] I also have a large, heavy-headed shovel from East Germany in my car in case of snow emergencies, and was thinking I could use it to quickly lop the head off. I'd then just dump the head in a bucket of bleach and soapy water to break up the meatybits and disinfect it

[QUOTE=Zillamaster55;50118670]I keep passing by this dead raccoon on the way to school and I'm really tempted to take it's skull to add it to a [B]growing bone collection [/B]I have but I don't know how I'd go about doing it [editline]12th April 2016[/editline] I also have a large, heavy-headed shovel from East Germany in my car in case of snow emergencies, and was thinking I could use it to quickly lop the head off. I'd then just dump the head in a bucket of bleach and soapy water to break up the meatybits and disinfect it[/QUOTE] Any dinosaur bones? :v:

[QUOTE=Skunky;50118958]Any dinosaur bones? :v:[/QUOTE] No but I got trilobites if u want fossils

I feel like the love advice sections and those threads have had a pretty reasonable impact on me getting GFs/cuming in a vag until it happens I was a socially awkward sophomore fuck that knew nothing about woman in 2009, posting with my FP-issued gasmask on. Having people to bounce ideals/advice off of for years really had an impact on me and how I see myself and relationships.

[QUOTE=Kite_shugo;50120355]I feel like the love advice sections and those threads have had a pretty reasonable impact on me getting GFs/cuming in a vag until it happens I was a socially awkward sophomore fuck that knew nothing about woman in 2009, posting with my FP-issued gasmask on. Having people to bounce ideals/advice of off for years really had an impact on me and how I see myself and relationships.[/QUOTE] brb going into super friendly advice thread now I have a confession. When I'm at home and there's nobody around, I like to get into my bed and cover myself in pillows and blankets and pretend I'm wearing a super-combat armor equipped with rocket pods and a minigun. I've done this since I was like 10 years old.

I would totally buy an airsoft minigun if I had the money and the physical strength to carry it even if its unfair because its a literal boolithose

i commit a crime across the street from a police station roughly twice a day [editline]asdf[/editline] I will reveal the mystery after 24 hours have passed. Prediction: People will collectively go "oh lol what a letdown"