[img]http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/fa/ShrewKatePetrucio.jpg[/img]
The man looks happy though
[QUOTE=usa;34444640][url]http://www.gjk2.com/test/test.swf[/url]
For those who think its a screamer, its not, but I actually bet you didnt get it on the first try.
Also, this is quite funny: [url]http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=uscc_part1[/url][/QUOTE]
Bitch it's called multitasking.
[QUOTE=usa;34444640][url]http://www.gjk2.com/test/test.swf[/url]
For those who think its a screamer, its not, but I actually bet you didnt get it on the first try.
Also, this is quite funny: [url]http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=uscc_part1[/url][/QUOTE]
Every time I play the game (after refreshing), it tells me I'm wrong even though I follow the ball to the exact same spot every time. But every play after the initial one (without reloading the game) is winnable.
That game cheats.
[quote][B]Anger Management[/B]
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it
out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know -- take it out on
someone you don't know.
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I had forgotten to
make. I found the number and dialed it.
A man answered, saying, "Hello."
I politely said, "Could I please speak with Robin Carter?"
Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone
could be so rude. I realized I had called the wrong number. I tracked down
Robin's correct number and called her. I had accidentally transposed the
last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up with her, I decided to
call the 'wrong' number again.
When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an asshole!" and
hung up.
I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my
desk drawer.
Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd
call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" It always cheered me up.
When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole' calling
would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John
Smith from the Telephone Company. I'm just calling to see if you're familiar
with the Caller ID program?"
He yelled, "NO!" and slammed the phone down.
I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!"
One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some
guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently
waited for.. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for that
spot. The idiot ignored me I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window . .
so, I wrote down his number.
A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole ( I had his
number on speed dial), I thought I had better call the BMW asshole, too.
I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"
"Yes, it is."
"Can you tell me where I can see it?"
"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the car's
parked right out in front."
"What's your name?" I asked.
"My name is Don Hansen," he said.
"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
"I'm home every evening after five."
"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
"Yes?"
"Don, you're an asshole."
Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had
a problem, I had two assholes to call.
But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it used
to be
So, I came up with an idea. I called Asshole #1.
"Hello."
"You're an asshole!" (But I didn't hang up.)
"Are you still there?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said.
"Stop calling me," he screamed.
"Make me," I said.
"Who are you?" he asked.
"My name is Don Hansen.."
"Yeah? Where do you live?"
"Asshole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black
Beamer parked in front."
He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying
your prayers."
I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole."
Then I called Asshole #2.
"Hello?" he said.
"Hello, asshole," I said.
He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are...!"
"You'll what?" I said.
"I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed.
I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."
Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at
1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay
lover.
Then I called Channel 13 News about the gang war going down on West 34th
Street.
I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th street.
When I got there, I saw two assholes beating the crap out of each other in
front of six squad cars, a police helicopter, and the channel 13 news crew.
NOW, I feel better - This is "Anger Management" at its very best.
[/quote]
from [url]http://danmax.net/jokes/anger_management.htm[/url]
[QUOTE=reddit.com;34444715][b][i]Le Come...[/i][/b]
[t]http://i.imgur.com/gN5NH.jpg[/t]
[url]http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/p1ltc/le_come/[/url][/QUOTE]
the come
the go
[QUOTE=Hoboharry;34444321]So a prison is where criminals and bad people go to stay for a couple of years, and they decide to make the prisoners comfortable?
Not that i'd want to make the prisoners sleep on a rock, but this is way too much for robbers/murderers and such.[/QUOTE]
No, it's perfect actually. Prisons exist to rehabilitate. What's the point of keeping someone imprisoned for like 5 years, letting them do nothing, and expect them to do good when they get out? At least here they can get an education, so they can get a job after their release. Your way of doing things will make them worse.
Has someone tried reversing the trampoline backbreaking incident? I wanna see the reversed!
[QUOTE=acds;34444614]Am I the only one that doesn't get these people posting about being friend-zoned? It doesn't make the girl look like a bitch, it just makes you look like a tool for being all pissy.[/QUOTE]
I agree
Men bitch so much about friend zoning that I now firmly believe that they're on the same level as the girls who say "All boys are the same"
[release]
[B]Original ad:[/B]
Wanted - CHILDRENS DVDS
Movies wanted for children aged 5 and up - will take all unwanted DVDs!
[/release]
[quote]
[B]From Me to *********@**********.org:[/B]
Hey there!
I'm trying to get rid of a bunch of movies I've had since I was a kid. The movie stores won't take them, and it would be a shame for me to just throw them out. I'd love to pass them on to people who can enjoy them. Let me know if you are interested.
Mike
[B]From Julia ****** to Me:[/B]
Mike - Which movies do you have and how much do you want for them?
[B]From Me to Julia ******:[/B]
Julia,
Here is the full list:
Alvin and the Chipmunks
Alladin
Backdoor Creampies 2
Beauty and the Beast
Big Black Threesome
Fantasia
Finally 18 and Legal
The Lion King
Mattress Slaves 3
The Mighty Ducks
Toy Story
Wet Squirters 5
Please let me know which ones you want.
Thanks,
Mike
[B]
From Julia ****** to Me:[/B]
Mike...some of those titles are inappropriate.
[B]From Me to Julia ******:[/B]
Julia,
Which titles are inappropriate?
Mike
[B]From Julia ****** to Me:[/B]
I think you know which ones...
[B]
From Me to Julia ******:[/B]
Are you talking about Fantasia? I know, I thought it was a Vietnam war movie too. I assure you it has nothing to do with Asia and is completely appropriate for children. The only other title I think you are referring to as inappropriate is The Lion King, but I think you are confusing that with "The Scorpion King," the violent movie starring Dwayne Johnson. While the Lion King does have adult themes, it is nothing like The Scorpion King.
I hope this clears things up.
Mike
[B]
From Julia ****** to Me:[/B]
No...explain to me how these movies are for children??? Backdoor Creampies, Big Black Threesome, Finally 18 and Legal, Mattress Slaves 3, Wet Squirters 5. It sounds to me like you are trying to throw out your porn collection.
[B]From Me to Julia ******:[/B]
Pornography? What a disgusting accusation! What kind of a person do you think I am? You have a really perverted mind if you think those movies are adult films.
You've really never heard of those movies? Where was your childhood? I'll find the plot summaries for you.
Backdoor Creampies - Cindy, a little girl with big ambitions, decides to open a bakery in her parents kitchen - selling pies to children who come to her backyard. Cindy learns that running a business isn't all fun and games in this hilarious tale of entrepreneurship.
Big Black Threesome - Barry, Billy and Bernie are three lovable black bears who have zany adventures during their quest for honey.
Finally 18 and Legal - A coming of age story about a young girl who becomes an independent woman.
Mattress Slaves 3 - Part 3 of the shocking documentary about slave labor in the mattress industry of third world countries. (Acceptable for kids, and in my opinion, a necessity to educate them on some real world issues. I never bought a foreign mattress again after this eye-opener.)
Wet Squirters 5 - The Squirters gang is back again in this heartwarming tale about a group of whales who try to find their long lost father in a vast ocean of wet sea critters.
Once again, I hope this clears things up for you.
Mike
[B]
From Julia ****** to Me:[/B]
You expect me to believe that all of those movies simply have unfortunate titles? Nice try.
[B]From Me to Julia ******:[/B]
Sorry to disappoint your sick mind Julia, but yes, they are all children's movies. So do you want them or not?
By the way, I just found 3 more movies to add to the collection I am offering:
Toy Story 2
James and the Giant Peach
Walt Disney's Double Penetration Cockblasts 3
Mike
[B]From Julia ****** to Me:[/B]
Okay I've had enough of this. You are a nut.
[B]From Me to Julia ******:[/B]
Think of the children, Julia. They will never get to enjoy these classic films because of you.
[B]
From Julia ****** to Me:[/B]
Go to hell.
[/quote]
Walt Disney's Double Penetration Cockblasts 3
god dammit i lost it
[QUOTE=TheLolrus;34444910]Walt Disney's Double Penetration Cockblasts 3
god dammit i lost it[/QUOTE]
[img]http://glossynews.com/102502/peanuts-penis.gif[/img]
[quote]
[b]Real Life Cybersex: A Reality Check[/b]
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse and a miniskirt and high heels. My measurements are 36-24-36. I work out every day. I'm toned and perfect. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweatpants I just bought at Walmart. I am also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner - it smells a little funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK.
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm gulping. I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are trembling.
Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool silk slides off my warm skin. I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and I accidently rip a hole in your blouse. I'm sorry.
Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
Sweetheart: Don't worry about it. I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft breasts are rising and falling, rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly. I'm reaching back and undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: I'm wiping your spit off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a *plop*.
Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweatpants down and rubbing your hard tool.
Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out, nibbling on your ... umm ... wait a minute.
Sweetheart: What's the matter?
Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
Sweetheart: Can I help?
Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: I'm on the bed, aching for you.
Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark. I'm lost. Where's the bedroom.
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Wellhung: I found it.
Sweetheart: I'm tuggin off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
Wellhung: Me too.
Wellhung: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately - our naked bodies pressing against each other.
Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
Sweetheart: Why don't you take off you glasses?
Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.
Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
Wellhung: I find the bathroom. It's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my ... you know ... thing ... in your ... you know ... woman's thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide it in! Screw me now!
Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around, an incredulous look on my face.
Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet, nasty blouse.
Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of your candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
[/quote]
and people say you don't read enough on the internet.
[img]http://www.freeple.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/where-do-babies-come-from.jpg[/img]
"[i]Jewellery[/i]"
[img]http://www.plasticbrickautomaton.com/comics/99.jpg[/img]
I wish i could just say that where I work.
[QUOTE=Hoboharry;34444321]So a prison is where criminals and bad people go to stay for a couple of years, and they decide to make the prisoners comfortable?
Not that i'd want to make the prisoners sleep on a rock, but this is way too much for robbers/murderers and such.[/QUOTE]
Look at the statistics, prisoners who have been reformed through a correctional facility such as the scandinavian prisons n stuff, they have a much lower chance of commiting more crimes. Prisoners that have been treated like shit in for example the american prisons, they have a higher chance of returning to jail. When society treats people like shit, they aren't gonna turn into well behaved citizens.
Also, those prisons aren't top level security, that's most likely for economical and "victimless" crimes.
[url]http://forumjunk.0x1a4.com/pirate.swf[/url]
this is the most entertaining version i have found so far
[img]http://memearchive.net/memerial.net/2045/differences-between-yp-and-yt.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=usa;34445122][url]http://forumjunk.0x1a4.com/pirate.swf[/url]
this is the most entertaining version i have found so far
[img]http://memearchive.net/memerial.net/2045/differences-between-yp-and-yt.jpg[/img][/QUOTE]
Probably because the common ages for porn sites are 20-50s, youtube is probably more like 9-17.
So, me and my friends made a giant slip 'n slide today. We made a wooden ramp starting from the top of one of my friends' house all the way down to their pool, 20 meters lower. we wanted to cover it with a plastic cover and have a constant flow of water running off of it, but at that moment my friends dad walked by. He suggested we let him provide us with a better solution. We reluctantly agreed and went inside to play some Halo Reach as he apparantly desired to work alone.
We did not know what we were in for when we went back out a few hours later. An entire team was putting the final touches to what was by far the most advanced slip 'n slide ever behold by human eyes. My friend's dad was an engineer who had been working with superconductors for quite some time, he made us a zero resistance slip 'n slide with custom, magnetic jackets.
I was the first one to try it out. What he didn't mention was that, apparantly, he also added computer controlled electromagets that were programmed to get the users to reach an incredible velocity. I accelerated enough to be slung into orbit around the earth. I must have been at an altitude of about 300 kilometers, because one orbit took me around 45 minutes. After the sixth orbit (I have a large loung capacity) I was hit by a very intense solar wind.
I felt more energetic than ever before and felt confident I no longer needed to breath. I was right, apparantly I also gained the ability to fly. I went to fly back to the surface of the earth, only to spot a gigantic asteroid appearing from behind the sun with my highly improved eyesight. I used my newly gained mathemathic genius to calculate its course and found out it was going to strike the earth in less than 3 months!
I flew right at it and landed on its surface. (now it may sound like i got there instantly, but in fact it took me almost an hour) The gravational force was only 0.087 N/kg and the heat was a scorching 70.000K! (it was exceptionally close to the sun) I practiced some breathing excercises, which were purely ritual as the was no atmoshere to speak of, and kamehameha'd the bastard to smithereens. I headed back to earth and almost overshot my entry into the earth's atmosphere when i got hit by a small piece of space derbis.
I am now back at home and have sacretly vowed to myself to protect the earth and it's populace at all cost, as a silent guardian. I wish to remain completely anonymous and won't even create an alterego to communicate with the public or authorities. I just wanted to let you know, there's somewhere out there, looking over you. I may not be able to negate everything bad that's happining or going to happen, but I'm applying myself fully to attempting anyway.
[QUOTE=kirederf7;34445429]So, me and my friends made a giant slip 'n slide today. We made a wooden ramp starting from the top of one of my friends' house all the way down to their pool, 20 meters lower. we wanted to cover it with a plastic cover and have a constant flow of water running off of it, but at that moment my friends dad walked by. He suggested we let him provide us with a better solution. We reluctantly agreed and went inside to play some Halo Reach as he apparantly desired to work alone.
We did not know what we were in for when we went back out a few hours later. An entire team was putting the final touches to what was by far the most advanced slip 'n slide ever behold by human eyes. My friend's dad was an engineer who had been working with superconductors for quite some time, he made us a zero resistance slip 'n slide with custom, magnetic jackets.
I was the first one to try it out. What he didn't mention was that, apparantly, he also added computer controlled electromagets that were programmed to get the users to reach an incredible velocity. I accelerated enough to be slung into orbit around the earth. I must have been at an altitude of about 300 kilometers, because one orbit took me around 45 minutes. After the sixth orbit (I have a large loung capacity) I was hit by a very intense solar wind.
I felt more energetic than ever before and felt confident I no longer needed to breath. I was right, apparantly I also gained the ability to fly. I went to fly back to the surface of the earth, only to spot a gigantic asteroid appearing from behind the sun with my highly improved eyesight. I used my newly gained mathemathic genius to calculate its course and found out it was going to strike the earth in less than 3 months!
I flew right at it and landed on its surface. (now it may sound like i got there instantly, but in fact it took me almost an hour) The gravational force was only 0.087 N/kg and the heat was a scorching 70.000K! (it was exceptionally close to the sun) I practiced some breathing excercises, which were purely ritual as the was no atmoshere to speak of, and kamehameha'd the bastard to smithereens. I headed back to earth and almost overshot my entry into the earth's atmosphere when i got hit by a small piece of space derbis.
I am now back at home and have sacretly vowed to myself to protect the earth and it's populace at all cost, as a silent guardian. I wish to remain completely anonymous and won't even create an alterego to communicate with the public or authorities. I just wanted to let you know, there's somewhere out there, looking over you. I may not be able to negate everything bad that's happining or going to happen, but I'm applying myself fully to attempting anyway.[/QUOTE]
Cool story
[QUOTE=kirederf7;34445429]So, me and my friends made a giant slip 'n slide today. We made a wooden ramp starting from the top of one of my friends' house all the way down to their pool, 20 meters lower. we wanted to cover it with a plastic cover and have a constant flow of water running off of it, but at that moment my friends dad walked by. He suggested we let him provide us with a better solution. We reluctantly agreed and went inside to play some Halo Reach as he apparantly desired to work alone.
We did not know what we were in for when we went back out a few hours later. An entire team was putting the final touches to what was by far the most advanced slip 'n slide ever behold by human eyes. My friend's dad was an engineer who had been working with superconductors for quite some time, he made us a zero resistance slip 'n slide with custom, magnetic jackets.
I was the first one to try it out. What he didn't mention was that, apparantly, he also added computer controlled electromagets that were programmed to get the users to reach an incredible velocity. I accelerated enough to be slung into orbit around the earth. I must have been at an altitude of about 300 kilometers, because one orbit took me around 45 minutes. After the sixth orbit (I have a large loung capacity) I was hit by a very intense solar wind.
I felt more energetic than ever before and felt confident I no longer needed to breath. I was right, apparantly I also gained the ability to fly. I went to fly back to the surface of the earth, only to spot a gigantic asteroid appearing from behind the sun with my highly improved eyesight. I used my newly gained mathemathic genius to calculate its course and found out it was going to strike the earth in less than 3 months!
I flew right at it and landed on its surface. (now it may sound like i got there instantly, but in fact it took me almost an hour) The gravational force was only 0.087 N/kg and the heat was a scorching 70.000K! (it was exceptionally close to the sun) I practiced some breathing excercises, which were purely ritual as the was no atmoshere to speak of, and kamehameha'd the bastard to smithereens. I headed back to earth and almost overshot my entry into the earth's atmosphere when i got hit by a small piece of space derbis.
I am now back at home and have sacretly vowed to myself to protect the earth and it's populace at all cost, as a silent guardian. I wish to remain completely anonymous and won't even create an alterego to communicate with the public or authorities. I just wanted to let you know, there's somewhere out there, looking over you. I may not be able to negate everything bad that's happining or going to happen, but I'm applying myself fully to attempting anyway.[/QUOTE]
[img]http://theuniblog.evilspacerobot.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/tumblr_lrll3nx9rn1qzozj1.gif[/img]
[QUOTE=kirederf7;34445429]So, me and my friends made a giant slip 'n slide today. We made a wooden ramp starting from the top of one of my friends' house all the way down to their pool, 20 meters lower. we wanted to cover it with a plastic cover and have a constant flow of water running off of it, but at that moment my friends dad walked by. He suggested we let him provide us with a better solution. We reluctantly agreed and went inside to play some Halo Reach as he apparantly desired to work alone.
We did not know what we were in for when we went back out a few hours later. An entire team was putting the final touches to what was by far the most advanced slip 'n slide ever behold by human eyes. My friend's dad was an engineer who had been working with superconductors for quite some time, he made us a zero resistance slip 'n slide with custom, magnetic jackets.
I was the first one to try it out. What he didn't mention was that, apparantly, he also added computer controlled electromagets that were programmed to get the users to reach an incredible velocity. I accelerated enough to be slung into orbit around the earth. I must have been at an altitude of about 300 kilometers, because one orbit took me around 45 minutes. After the sixth orbit (I have a large loung capacity) I was hit by a very intense solar wind.
I felt more energetic than ever before and felt confident I no longer needed to breath. I was right, apparantly I also gained the ability to fly. I went to fly back to the surface of the earth, only to spot a gigantic asteroid appearing from behind the sun with my highly improved eyesight. I used my newly gained mathemathic genius to calculate its course and found out it was going to strike the earth in less than 3 months!
I flew right at it and landed on its surface. (now it may sound like i got there instantly, but in fact it took me almost an hour) The gravational force was only 0.087 N/kg and the heat was a scorching 70.000K! (it was exceptionally close to the sun) I practiced some breathing excercises, which were purely ritual as the was no atmoshere to speak of, and kamehameha'd the bastard to smithereens. I headed back to earth and almost overshot my entry into the earth's atmosphere when i got hit by a small piece of space derbis.
I am now back at home and have sacretly vowed to myself to protect the earth and it's populace at all cost, as a silent guardian. I wish to remain completely anonymous and won't even create an alterego to communicate with the public or authorities. I just wanted to let you know, there's somewhere out there, looking over you. I may not be able to negate everything bad that's happining or going to happen, but I'm applying myself fully to attempting anyway.[/QUOTE]
[IMG]http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/154/912/berneydidnotread.gif[/IMG]
[QUOTE=kirederf7;34445429]So, me and my friends made a giant slip 'n slide today. We made a wooden ramp starting from the top of one of my friends' house all the way down to their pool, 20 meters lower. we wanted to cover it with a plastic cover and have a constant flow of water running off of it, but at that moment my friends dad walked by. He suggested we let him provide us with a better solution. We reluctantly agreed and went inside to play some Halo Reach as he apparantly desired to work alone.
We did not know what we were in for when we went back out a few hours later. An entire team was putting the final touches to what was by far the most advanced slip 'n slide ever behold by human eyes. My friend's dad was an engineer who had been working with superconductors for quite some time, he made us a zero resistance slip 'n slide with custom, magnetic jackets.
I was the first one to try it out. What he didn't mention was that, apparantly, he also added computer controlled electromagets that were programmed to get the users to reach an incredible velocity. I accelerated enough to be slung into orbit around the earth. I must have been at an altitude of about 300 kilometers, because one orbit took me around 45 minutes. After the sixth orbit (I have a large loung capacity) I was hit by a very intense solar wind.
I felt more energetic than ever before and felt confident I no longer needed to breath. I was right, apparantly I also gained the ability to fly. I went to fly back to the surface of the earth, only to spot a gigantic asteroid appearing from behind the sun with my highly improved eyesight. I used my newly gained mathemathic genius to calculate its course and found out it was going to strike the earth in less than 3 months!
I flew right at it and landed on its surface. (now it may sound like i got there instantly, but in fact it took me almost an hour) The gravational force was only 0.087 N/kg and the heat was a scorching 70.000K! (it was exceptionally close to the sun) I practiced some breathing excercises, which were purely ritual as the was no atmoshere to speak of, and kamehameha'd the bastard to smithereens. I headed back to earth and almost overshot my entry into the earth's atmosphere when i got hit by a small piece of space derbis.
I am now back at home and have sacretly vowed to myself to protect the earth and it's populace at all cost, as a silent guardian. I wish to remain completely anonymous and won't even create an alterego to communicate with the public or authorities. I just wanted to let you know, there's somewhere out there, looking over you. I may not be able to negate everything bad that's happining or going to happen, but I'm applying myself fully to attempting anyway.[/QUOTE]
[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FhXz60f0HLU[/media]
[QUOTE=kirederf7;34445429]So, me and my friends made a giant slip 'n slide today. We made a wooden ramp starting from the top of one of my friends' house all the way down to their pool, 20 meters lower. we wanted to cover it with a plastic cover and have a constant flow of water running off of it, but at that moment my friends dad walked by. He suggested we let him provide us with a better solution. We reluctantly agreed and went inside to play some Halo Reach as he apparantly desired to work alone.
We did not know what we were in for when we went back out a few hours later. An entire team was putting the final touches to what was by far the most advanced slip 'n slide ever behold by human eyes. My friend's dad was an engineer who had been working with superconductors for quite some time, he made us a zero resistance slip 'n slide with custom, magnetic jackets.
I was the first one to try it out. What he didn't mention was that, apparantly, he also added computer controlled electromagets that were programmed to get the users to reach an incredible velocity. I accelerated enough to be slung into orbit around the earth. I must have been at an altitude of about 300 kilometers, because one orbit took me around 45 minutes. After the sixth orbit (I have a large loung capacity) I was hit by a very intense solar wind.
I felt more energetic than ever before and felt confident I no longer needed to breath. I was right, apparantly I also gained the ability to fly. I went to fly back to the surface of the earth, only to spot a gigantic asteroid appearing from behind the sun with my highly improved eyesight. I used my newly gained mathemathic genius to calculate its course and found out it was going to strike the earth in less than 3 months!
I flew right at it and landed on its surface. (now it may sound like i got there instantly, but in fact it took me almost an hour) The gravational force was only 0.087 N/kg and the heat was a scorching 70.000K! (it was exceptionally close to the sun) I practiced some breathing excercises, which were purely ritual as the was no atmoshere to speak of, and kamehameha'd the bastard to smithereens. I headed back to earth and almost overshot my entry into the earth's atmosphere when i got hit by a small piece of space derbis.
I am now back at home and have sacretly vowed to myself to protect the earth and it's populace at all cost, as a silent guardian. I wish to remain completely anonymous and won't even create an alterego to communicate with the public or authorities. I just wanted to let you know, there's somewhere out there, looking over you. I may not be able to negate everything bad that's happining or going to happen, but I'm applying myself fully to attempting anyway.[/QUOTE]
[IMG]http://bootlegsbypeoplewhocare.net/together/THE+CLUB+CAN+T+EVEN+HANDLE+ME+RIGHT+NOW+YES+STEVE_dcf0ae_2205165.gif[/IMG]
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