Well, I'm not sure if this is normal, but when I'm sitting down, I get this really tingly sensation on just about everything below my waist, so I tend to get a boner and some violent leg twitches.
-Removed unrelated shit-
I've never been caught. I am always careful before I start. Either I am in the bathroom, or nobodies home. I have a bucket if I'm not. When I'm done I rinse out the bucket with soap. It would be too embarrasing to get caught.
[QUOTE=Petrussen;28806078]I hope that's not the results of [b]FIRECOCK.[/b]
(the burning sensation you get in your dick that comes when you fap after taking a piss)[/QUOTE]
Awesome, i was trying to find a word for that sensation that I thought only I felt.
I thought there was something wrong with me...
Heh, I think I've made a decent thread for once.
Any news on the Patcher thread?
[QUOTE=Numidium;28806733]Does it enhance the experience?
[editline]25th March 2011[/editline]
What a pageking.[/QUOTE]
Meh, I guess it does. Not a lot, though. That might just be me.
I read the "The second your name is called, Masturbate" thread while my parents were in the room, and my name was called.
[QUOTE=jesse194;28816314]I read the "The second your name is called, Masturbate" thread while my parents were in the room, and my name was called.[/QUOTE]
Daaamn son.
[QUOTE=Numidium;28806733]Does it enhance the experience?
[editline]25th March 2011[/editline]
What a pageking.[/QUOTE]
It enhances the experience only if you're smoking it out of your dick, since it goes straight to the male reproductive organs and stimulates the penile glands, causing more sperm to be reproduced and a better climax.
Anymore fapping experiences? :smug:
come on guys! :fappery:
I was fapping and playing Roller Coaster Tycoon 2 at the same time. I wasn't paying attention to the game and I deleted a ride over water and everybody drowned. :smith:
Guess what guys? Though I deleted the file, I found the Patcher thread.
[QUOTE=myalt22;28825480]Guess what guys? Though I deleted the file, I found the Patcher thread.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, I found that like a week ago. I didn't know you guys thought it was gone :v:
[url]http://www.facepunch.com/threads/1042931-The-Chronicles-of-Patcher[/url]
[QUOTE=myalt22;28825480]Guess what guys? Though I deleted the file, I found the Patcher thread.[/QUOTE]
Post it?
[editline]26th March 2011[/editline]
I mean, with the OP and everything.
[editline]26th March 2011[/editline]
Just to clarify, Patcher is Trase, in case anyone was uncertain.
[url]http://www.facepunch.com/threads/1042931-The-Chronicles-of-Patcher?p=27021032&viewfull=1#post27021032[/url]
[QUOTE=~ZOMG;28825809]Post it?
[editline]26th March 2011[/editline]
I mean, with the OP and everything.
[editline]26th March 2011[/editline]
Just to clarify, Patcher is Trase, in case anyone was uncertain.
[url]http://www.facepunch.com/threads/1042931-The-Chronicles-of-Patcher?p=27021032&viewfull=1#post27021032[/url][/QUOTE]
This is old news.
Also Patcher/TRASE/whatever the fuck you wanna call him
is one of the greatest FP members of all time
[QUOTE=superdinoman;28825981]Also Patcher/TRASE/whatever the fuck you wanna call him
is one of the greatest FP members of all time[/QUOTE]
yeah, what's not to like about a guy who ejaculates on his 13 year old sister while she sleeps?
[QUOTE=Ali Legend;28826077]yeah, what's not to like about a guy who ejaculates on his 13 year old sister while she sleeps?[/QUOTE]
Somebody's jealous...
[QUOTE=Ali Legend;28826077]yeah, what's not to like about a guy who ejaculates on his 13 year old sister while she sleeps?[/QUOTE]
u so jelly I can taste it
What I got out of the Patcher Story:
Patcher/Trase/Redfox made out with/ ejaculated on/ fucked his sister/cousin.
His sister didn't mind.
Someone traced him down as he used the same username on multiple forums and had his phone/contact info there. Called his parents. Got in deep shit with them and his sister.
Moral: Don't be a sick fuck/ post it on the internet.
He was not arrested. I spoke to Patcher on Steam, nothing had happened except everyone on facepunch knew.
All that was years ago, he turned into a normal person, with an proper love life.
[editline]26th March 2011[/editline]
Also, brb, compiling and putting onto ED.
Yo, make it graphic and shit.
Never been actually caught but been close many times.
My computer is facing the window so anyone outside of our house can see me fap. My mother always looks at me from outside of my window when she comes back from work, so I have had many close calls with her popping into the window in the middle of me fapping.
Also once when I had closed the curtains in my room when fapping in the middle of the day, my dad came home and he bursted into my room and asked what I was doing. I luckily had just closed my zipper and was only a bit sweaty and I told him that the sun had been too bright.
[quote]I'm Patcher, 18 year old, male, 182cm tall, live in Ukraine, Ternopil', Kyivska street. I'm a certified Psychologist and work on my house with people who pay me.
I was fat and ugly and my sister only loved me as a brother, and other girls and boys only loved me as a psychologist. I was also an asshole when I was on the internet that's why every one hated me in my past life on FP. Once a girl I know over the internet drew a simple anime-styled portrait of me on how I will look if I lose some weight. Surprisingly, it got me really motivated and I started to work out and eat healthy food and learn to sweet-talk and pickup in between. After I lost 15 kilos in the past three months (but gained a lot of muscle mass) and gained +5 CHR and +80 Speech People started to like me, girls started to hit on me and My sister started to say that I got attractive. Using this I made my sister fall in love with me because she's fucking hot, and also found a boyfriend because I don't see myself falling in love with a girl - I like to romantically date and fuck guys and only fuck girls. I also love people. I love to help them and My heart is beating wildly when I see that I'm actually helping someone become happy (this is why I have chosen my job). I love to draw, play guitar, biketrial, sing, compose music, play videogames, make mods for them, do machinima and sell hacks online and troll people (last two was a joke, someone will get it). I was born in 1992, I met Y2k in 2000, got a job in 2009, became a millionaire in 2012, became a world famous in 2014, in 2020 I was given an award "Most polite and loving human of all time OF ALL TIME". Died in 2093 peacefully in my dream while dreaming about God and as a man who has made life on Earth a little better for every one and stopped hunger. That should sum it up.[/quote]
I've never been caught, but it was embarrassing when I fapped the first time looking at Mafia II playboy and all of a sudden white stuff shot out and I realized what I was doing and began clean up.
[editline]27th March 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=tommofandan;28693143]
My Dad, who doesn't live with my family, (I go to his twice a week and stay over) texted my mom and said "I've found stains on his sheets and I thought it was milk until I found pictures of porn in temp downloaded files, (I didn't fucking have a clue how he found out)"
[/QUOTE]
Here's how he found out:
Used cache viewer program
[img]http://img861.imageshack.us/img861/692/window.png[/img]
Found url to image
[img]http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/8783/window2e.png[/img]
Dad found out what it was: Naughty Naughty
Future reference: Delete your cache/history.
Why is -TRASE- The greatest facepunch member of all time?
I don't see any noteworthy threads but this thread:
[url]http://www.facepunch.com/threads/853499-Am-i-cute?[/url]
[QUOTE=silentninja;28827232]
[img_thumb]http://img861.imageshack.us/img861/692/window.png[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/8783/window2e.png[/img_thumb]
Found out what it was: Naughty Naughty[/QUOTE]
I feel like I'm now wanted by the police because I saw these images.
I'm so computer illiterate :gonk:
well one time pre-fap I left the porn on my desktop and went to the bath room my friend walked into my room ( mom let him in ) I found him sitting there in aw (facepalm)
[QUOTE=SeverePapercut;28827814]well one time pre-fap I left the porn on my desktop and went to the bath room my friend walked into my room ( mom let him in ) I found him sitting there in aw (facepalm)[/QUOTE]
Never, ever, EVER leave porn on the screen when you are leaving the room, even for a second.
[QUOTE=myalt22;28827967]Never, ever, EVER leave porn on the screen when you are leaving the room, even for a second.[/QUOTE]
this lesson I have learned
[QUOTE=SeverePapercut;28828084]this lesson I have learned[/QUOTE]
I wouldnt' leave it open to plugin headphones or grab clean up gear, you never know what will come through that door, and you must be on your guard.
Trase is an annoying, gay attention whore.
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