Corrupt a Wish! - General - Facepunch Forum

But the battlecruiser looks like a penis and it explodes when you look at it. I wish I owned a planet

Granted. But it is full of poisonous gasses. I wish I had a Giant Turtle.

It eats you to bankcrupty. I wish i own a planet.

Granted, but it's LV-426. I wish that I could find love.

Granted. You find the perfect match for you. You do not know when you meet this person, but when you do, you know it was meant to be. You two have the best day of your lives. And then you wake up and realize it was only a dream. You will never see dreams of this person again, nor will you ever meet anyone as good in real life. I wish that I could find love as well.

Granted, but when you come to see her naked and ready for sex, she turns out to be a Shemale. I wish i was in Top Gear as a guest star.

[QUOTE=SassPD22;43017028]Granted, but when you come to see her naked and ready for sex, she turns out to be a Shemale. I wish i was in Top Gear as a guest star.[/QUOTE] You didn't corrupt my wish, you made it twice as good. Also granted, you're now a guest star and you get to drive a new prototype car along with all of your favorite Top Gear guys. However, there is a malfunction and you end up getting all 3 of them killed. I wish that I wouldn't have forgotten to ask a question.

Granted. But your question was a stupid one. I wish I had a robot servant.

Granted but when you're sleeping it plots to kill you. I wish they celebrated Thanksgiving here because I feel like turkey.

Granted, but you'll probably end up being in a Black Friday fight the day later. I wish I was a lot more creative.

Granted. But you can only create arms and legs. I wish I could dig a hole.

Granted; you dig holes into your skin as you become entirely dependent on Heroin. The feeling of bugs crawling under your skin haunts you until the day you die, and the holes you dig will never be deep enough. I wish I could lose.

Granted. You lose at losing. I wish for gumbo

-snip-

Granted, you get cut into ribbons by the -snip- however. I wish that I had a Saxxy for doing absolutely nothing.

Granted; however everyone now expects you to be a top-tier animator, and you receive criticism from all of your piers for each day that you don't release a new film. I wish I wasn't alone.

Granted, you become so engrossed with the game you play for over 100 hours nonstop and die of starvation. I wish i had a shotgun and a pickup truck's worth of ammo.

Granted: It's a Nerf Shotgun and the ammunition is cannonballs for cannons. I wish for a large bag filled with US 100 Dollar bills, so I could use it as a distraction/bribe

Granted, but the dollars are obviously fake so no-one will accept them. I wish for a Swiss army knife!

Granted, the only tools in it are a minidildo and a picture of Billy Mays. You know what to do. I wish for my own personal Metal Gear REX

Granted, you get a microscopic figure of it I wish I had one of those clicky mechanical keyboards and a usb computer mouse.

Granted, but the mechanical keyboard is just a typewriter, and the USB mouse is just a generic PS/2 ball mouse from the 90's connected to a USB adapter. I wish for Dark Souls.

Granted, but its graphics are now fully ASCII I wish for a Korg MS-20

Granted; all of its sounds have been replaced by cumming, fapping, shitting and farting sounds I wish for 85000 wads of $100 bills.

Granted, you get 85000 wads of soggy, chewed up, ripped apart and smushed together $100 bills, littered throughout your house waist-deep making the whole place smell like shit. I wish for certainty in everything.

Granted but although you are certain you never do anything but sleep just to be more certain. I wish for a donut.

Granted, but it's an extremely sticky glazed donut. And there are no napkins available. I wish for a time machine.

Granted: The time machine runs off extremely limited charges, and it has only two charges, a fact you're unaware of, so You cause a massive time paradox resulting in a war between the Humans, and the Dinosaurs, where the Humans have the technology equivalent to the Medieval ages, and the leaders are extremely cruel facists, whilst millions die everyday. You're unable to fix this because your time machine's only function is now a car, and you have no idea as to how you recharge the car. I wish to engage in a game of Russian Roulette against Gabe Newell

Granted, and you win. Gabe Newell's brains are splattered across the near wall, Valve is later disbanded as a company, and the last installation of the Half-Life 2 story-arc is never fully developed and released, lost forever. I wish for world prosperity brought on by a concerted effort of extraterrestrial resource extraction, such as regolith refinement and asteroid mining.