i couldn't resist doing portal shit
[quote]Stranger: Hey
You: Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it? Because, despite your violent behavior, the only thing you've managed to break so far... is my heart. Maybe you could settle for that, and we'll just call it a day. I guess we both know that isn't going to happen.
You: There was even going to be a party for you. A big party, that all your friends were invited to. I invited your best friend, the Companion Cube. Of course, he couldn't come because you murdered him. All your other friends couldn't come either, because you don't have any other friends, because of how unlikable you are. It says so right here in your personnel file: "Unlikable. Liked by no one. A bitter, unlikable loner, whose passing shall not be mourned." Shall NOT be mourned. That's exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official. It also says you were adopted, so that's funny, too.
You: Look, you're wasting your time. And believe me, you don't have a whole lot left to waste. What's your point, anyway? *Survival*? Well then, the last thing you want to do is hurt me. I have your brain scanned and permanently backed-up in case something terrible happens to you, which it's just about to. Don't believe me? Here, I'll put you on:
Stranger: ...
Stranger: :D
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/quote]
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: SO I HERD U LEIK MUDKIPZ
Stranger: OH YAH! LEIK TOTELLLEE!
You: OMAGAD
Stranger: I ALSO TOALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS.
You: YOU DONT?!
You: THEN HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU LEIK?!
Stranger: BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE... F'IN SWEEET DUDE
You: R U FIN SRS?!
You: CUZ MUDKIPZ ARE LEIK TEH COOLEST YOU
You: YO
Stranger: YO! OMGGGGGGG
Stranger: I LOVE THAT WORD
Stranger: ARE YOU LEIK... A SCRIBBLER?
Stranger: WELL FINE
Stranger: BE THAT WAY.
You: LOL
You: NO I AM NOT A SCRIBBLER
Stranger: I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME!
You: WHATS A SCRIBBLER
You: NO I DONT
You: I NEVER DID
You: MWAHAHAHAHAHA
Stranger: BUT... AFTER ALL THOSE YEARS!
Stranger: AND THE FACT THAT YOU... YOU PROPOSED TO ME
You: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!
You: I NEVER PROPOSED TO YOU!!!
Stranger: APRIL FOOLS!
You: ITS NOT APRIL!!!
Stranger: this is your father, marianne
You: BUT LUKE, I AM YOUR FATHER!
Stranger: no darth.
Stranger: ... now marianne... GET TO BED!
You: AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE?!
Stranger: what?
You: PRINCESS LEIAH IS YOUR SISTER!
Stranger: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
You: AND OBI-WAN?!
Stranger: HE'S MY BOYTOY?
You: I USED TO BE HIS PADAWAN.
You: YOU REVERSE-PEDOPHILE!
Stranger: WAHHHHHH?
Stranger: IT'S CALLED A COUGAR.
You: OH WAIT, YOU DON'T REMEMBER WHAT A PADAWAN IS BECUZ U NEVER REALLY ARE A JEDI-KNIGHT.
Stranger: GET IT RIGHT!
Stranger: I THOUGHT I KNEW YOU!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: HELLO
Stranger: i have a big problem
Stranger: you need to help me
You: what problem?
Stranger: i cant pee
Stranger: big problem you see
Stranger: ???
Stranger: it heard..
Stranger: a lot
You: ouch
Stranger: ohh.. it begins to bleed..
You: boy or girl?
Stranger: HELP ME
Stranger: boy
Stranger: HELP
You: go see a doctor!!
You: wait, is this one of those games? o_O
You: or are you for real?
Stranger: i think it becuase, you sholudn't play with fish and so..
Stranger: games??
Stranger: what games?
Stranger: I only known patman
You: like "you are stuck in a dark room, and an angry man is sitting in the middle of it"
Stranger: and ofcouse pacman
You: lol
You: what century are you from?
Stranger: ohh.. like mexico people.. very sad...
Stranger: but not me
Stranger: im from india
You: oh it must be crowded there.
Stranger: i like to eat, but now i cant pee and make a phoo...
Stranger: you know?
You: uhhh
Stranger: a big problem
You: eat foods with lots of fiber.
You: what have you been eating lately?
Stranger: ohh..
Stranger: my bad.. i think i eat the wrong food :O
Stranger: because
Stranger: i eat all the wood in my garden Razz
Stranger: i like wood
You: how do u have wood in ur garden.
Stranger: is like candy
Stranger: i cant stop
You: <_<
You: how do u have internet?
Stranger: a tree
Stranger: you know a tree?
You: yeah.
You: it's very tree-like
You: and brown.
You: like poo
Stranger: the tree is my wireless internet, and then a lend a pc from my dead friend..
Stranger: HELP ME
I cant pee and poo
You: GO GO CHECK IN UR MEDICINE CABINET!
Stranger: but i need to do it soon, or i= BOOM .... You know?
You: quickly! what color was your pee the last time you peed?!
You: DONT U HAVE DOCTORS IN INDIA?!
Stranger: my cabinet, i had eat it
Stranger: i eat them
You: U CANNIBAL!!!
Stranger: the doctors you mean ?
Stranger: i eat them..
Stranger: no no no
You: OK OK!
Stranger: im india
You: OMG!
You: U ATE LATIKA!!!
You: AND JAMAL!
Stranger: not a cannibal, is that another game?
You: u know
You: from that movie
Stranger: i like Jim Karry
You: i like ur mom
You: Very Happy
Stranger: me2
You: thats hot
Stranger: she is very sexy Very Happy
You: i know right
You: u must ate her
Stranger: why?
Stranger: she gave me all the wood?
You: cuz u eat stuff
You: no. india give you all the wood.
Stranger: she said it's good for me
You: then shes a liar.
You: a big fat
You: indian liar
You: QUICK!
Stranger: india, not gave me the wood, they gave me the wireless...
You: when was the last time you ate curry?!
Stranger: now...
You: but wood is wireless right?
You: how do you eat it?
Stranger: together with my wood
You: through mouth or butt?
You: wood spoon?
Stranger: my wood...
Stranger: yea ..
Stranger: thats good
You: morning wood? o_O
Stranger: im india
Stranger: yes yes
You: im saddam hussein
Stranger: and vodka
Stranger: i like vodka
Stranger: and helium bread..
You: WHAT ABOUT RUM?!
You: RED RUM!
Stranger: thats good Very Happy
You: RED FRIGGIN RUM
Stranger: rum??
You: RUM
Stranger: ohh..
Stranger: yes yes..
You: so u go boom boom pow yet?
Stranger: rum is good for my penis Very Happy
You: yes.
Stranger: no..
You: i bet it is.
Stranger: i still have my big problem.
Stranger: thats why i write to you
You: im guessing u ate hospital too?
Stranger: you need to help me
You: go go en.wikipedia.org
Stranger: can you please send me some wood?
You: get frosty.
You: OK OK
You: WHERE IN INDIA U LIVE?
Stranger: so i cant eat it, and make a big poo
You: near latika?
Stranger: and pee
You: u know
You: from the movie
You: called
Stranger: so i need the vodka
You: slumdog millionaire?
You: u need vodka to make pee?
You: why not drink ur own pee
Stranger: and then you send me the rum, for my penis friend, and my mom
Stranger: i cant pee...
Stranger: and poo
You: why not?
Stranger: very bad
You: when last time you make poo poo and pee pee
Stranger: i only got 1 holl..
Stranger: never
You: what the heck does that mean
You: it goes out ur mouth?
You: ok ok
Stranger: noo
You: u have mirror near you?
Stranger: i cant said anything
You: u cant talk? o_O
You: u can only type?
You: jai ho?
Stranger: i only got a holl on my head?
Stranger: is that not normal?
You: uhhh
You: no ear holes?
You: nose holes?
Stranger: nope
Stranger: nope
You: u deaf?
Stranger: yes
You: MOUTH BREATHER!
Stranger: im india
You: im saddam hussein.
Stranger: you cant me saddam hussein, because he sad next beside me??
Stranger: and there is not 2 of them..
You: no?
You: I SAID DO U HAVE MIRROR ANYWHERE NEAR YOUZ?!
Stranger: what is a mirror?
You: hey, u have tickets?
Stranger: can you eat it ?
You: yes. iz like wood. cept harder.
You: and make u bleed easily when you touch pointy part
Stranger: no, im sorry..
You: u wana get frosty with me?
Stranger: yes yes..
You: TO WENDY'S THEN!
Stranger: but
You: do u have wendys in india?
You: yes?
Stranger: wendys??? Can you eat it?
You: u can eat there
Stranger: ohh..
Stranger: i think so
You: itz like mcdonalds
You: u have mcdonalds
Stranger: you wanna hear a secret?
You: sure.
You: but i cant hear
You: u typing
Stranger: i had very leave my hause before...
Stranger: im to big..
Stranger: Sad
You: D:
You: how big?
You: like... house big?
You: tree big?
Stranger: sooooo big
Stranger: like a tree
You: brown like tree?
Stranger: but my dead friend said, I can go...
You: go where?
Stranger: outside..
You: how can dead friend said?
Stranger: you know the holl on my head ?
You: no, i dont know holl in ur head.
Stranger: i can do very thing with it Very Happy
Stranger: sad face
You: u have holl to talk?
Stranger: you like cheesecake?
Stranger: no
You: no, do u like fish sticks?
Stranger: im india
Stranger: if you can eat it, so yes yes
You: do u like putting fish sticks in ur mouth?
Stranger: i make my first poo !!!!
Stranger: before...
Stranger: Very Happy
Stranger: you help me alot
You: congratulations. Very Happy
Stranger: thank you very much
You: ur welcome senor.
Stranger: now i can go outside..
Stranger: ohh..
Stranger: wait
You: how u not go outside and eat trees? o_O
Stranger: how do you walk ?
You: very carefully.
Stranger: no.. it was all the time my mom, how came with my wood
Stranger: how?
You: u see ur mom walk?
You: do what she do.
Stranger: nope
Stranger: i cant see
Stranger: haha
You: then how the frick can u read this?!
Stranger: it was a joke Very Happy
You: i knew it.
Stranger: funny Very Happy
You: ur funny.
You: u win the internetz win.
Stranger: thanks
Stranger: good good
Stranger: can you eat it?
You: yes.
Stranger: good good..
You: u rly from india? o_O
Stranger: so am I happy Very Happy
Stranger: yea Very Happy
You: r u in india right now?
Stranger: yes yes
Stranger: i cant walk
You: paraplegic?
Stranger: what is this? can you eat it?
You: no. it is a noun. a non-solid noun. it is a hypothetical noun that humans made up in the english language.
You: it's round
You: like a record
You: that you spin
You: like a record
You: baby
You: right round
You: round round
Stranger: ohhh..
Stranger: what is a baby?
You: it is what you eat. Very Happy
Stranger: it sounds like you can eat it?
Stranger: like candy Smile
You: very much like candy
You: and u can steal candy from them Very Happy
Stranger: is baby a wood?
You: yes.
Stranger: ohhh...
You: GOOD BYE I HAVE TO TAKE POO
You: and u should too.
You: hey that rhymes.
You have disconnected.
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: hi
Stranger: female/feminina?
You: Das fraulein, ja
Stranger: ohh du deutsch?
You: doosh lol
You have disconnected.
[editline]06:30PM[/editline]
Stranger: hey babe r u hot and horny
You: ye
You: wanna cyber
Stranger: hit me up with a naked pic
Stranger: please
You: k 1 sec
Stranger: ight thanks babe
Stranger: u uploading?
You: [url]http://tbn2.google.com/images?q=tbn:0twKIb3UpSHBCM:http://s3.amazonaws.com/vodpod.com.videos.thumbnail/184236.medium160.jpg[/url]
You: there you go hon
You: you like it?
Stranger: fuck you bitch
Met this guy. Gave me his cell number and I called it using a combination of [url=http://icall.com/free-phone-calls/]iCall[/url] and [url=http://www.2flashgames.com/f/f-157.htm]Jack Black soundboard.[/url]. Just 2 minutes of insulting eachother. It was awesome. Number's (323) 316-0226 located in LA if you want.
[quote]You: U MOTHAFUCKIN DICK
You: EAT MAH COC K
Stranger: okay
Stranger: okay
Stranger: say it to my face though
Stranger: call me
You: before I ejaculate semen all over your face.
Stranger: 3233160226
Stranger: call me and say it
You: will do
You: is that a cell?
Stranger: ye
Stranger: cmon pussy
You: I am
You: alright
You: oh sorry I had my sound off
Stranger: why are nyou scared?
Stranger: fking lies
You: dude
You: I just called them
Stranger: you pussi ass faggot
You: [url]http://icall.com/free-phone-calls/[/url]
You: hold on
You: whitepages.com says that number is a land line in los angeles
You: unregistered
Stranger: its not you faggot
Stranger: that was me
You: oh
You: should I call it again?
Stranger: haha faggot
Stranger: are you asian??
Stranger: you have a lil penis??
You: yes
You: it's very tiny
You: haha this is fun
Stranger: just fking answer me
Stranger: with your real voice
You: I'm using that icall thing and I don't have a mic
You: so I'm using the fabulous use of soundboards
You: oh shit my call ended
You: 2 mins max
You: anyways nice talking to you
You have disconnected.[/quote]
[QUOTE=mm3guy;15981656]All of these are pretty unfunny.[/QUOTE]
IMO jealous because he tried to troll on Omegle and got nervous and failed.
[QUOTE=mm3guy;15981656]All of these are pretty unfunny.[/QUOTE]
Go away, that purple text doesnt make you special.
However I think my chat log would be pretty interesting if you gave it a quick read.
[quote]Stranger: hi
You: Hey
Stranger: i need fetish help
You: I see.
You: Go ahead.
Stranger: well i like furries and im not sure if i should stop looking at furry porn,or not cause i like jerking to it but i just feel guilty caue alot of people dont like furries
You: Naw man, naw naw, furries are for furfags
You: Stop looking at furries immediately
Stranger: um ok
Stranger: what fetishes are ok
You: One day you will be looking at furries, the next you will be fucking a cat or something
Stranger: i wont ill stop
Stranger: is liking feet ok?
You: Yeah I guess
You: Since people have feet
You: Do you like feet then?
Stranger: yes...
You: What do you like about them?
Stranger: just the way they look,and ive always wanted a footjob
Stranger: sorry if im being weird
You: Naw man don't worry I'm here to help.
You: Footjob. Why? What's the point?
Stranger: i dont know i just kinda want one[/quote]
That was wierd.
The first convo was
Stranger: hi
You: Howdy!
Stranger: asl?
You: A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stanger: fine den weirdo
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Then I click to start a new convo and this happens
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hi
You: Howdy
Stranger: asl ?
You: A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: i just spoke 2 u fukin heel
You: Haha
You: Ha
You: HAHAHA
You: ha
You: hahaha
You: haaha
You: haha
Stranger: ur MUM bitch
You: Haha
You: Ha
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
[code]Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: I am here to ...
You: Waste your time.
You: Any time
Stranger: okay
You: La la la la
You: *Wasting time*
Stranger: shaalalala
Stranger: im a hundu
Stranger: *hindu
You: Time wasting in progress
You: Please be paciente
You: :3
Stranger: im from north kore
You: Ohhh.. So your japan? :o
Stranger: I <3 KIM-JONG-IL
Stranger: no
You: Strange
You: Cause your IP is japan
Stranger: sure :o
You: I am stupid. D:
Stranger: kidding me?
Stranger: where did you check it?? :O
You: lol
You: I was kiding you
Stranger: soon you americans will know everything from our nuclear weapons :S:S:S:S:S:S:S
You: I am in your bed eating your patata. :D
Stranger: DAMN IT
You: I am not american.. :O
Stranger: CURSE YOU!
You: I am mayan. D:
Stranger: repeat me:
You: I know everythink
You: The end will come in 2012
You: Actually, your end..D:
You: You will die from too much rice.. D:
Stranger: rice poisoning :OO
You: Yea. D:
You: Cause I pooped on it
Stranger: oh noes
Stranger: what should i do
You: Poop in your bed
Stranger: I KNOW
Stranger: i must clean the poop and throw it back to america :O
You: D:
Stranger: with our nuclear weapon
You: Nah I can't accept that...
You: It's too nice of you.. D:
Stranger: which state you are from? D:
You: Atlanteans
You: We love poop
You: And nuclear weapons
Stranger: :p i didnt knew that from you :D
You: Orly?
Stranger: im from illinois
You: You know that we created you? D:
Stranger: OMG
Stranger: :O
You: Your a special prototipe
You: You can climb on walls
You: Jump off the trees
You: And even kill yourself
Stranger: AMAZING
Stranger: the last one is neat
You: If you eat bananas on the other side you will get super poweers!!!
You: By other side I meant your as*
Stranger: :L
You: Don't like it?
You: Take a deth and rechose your super powers
Stranger: you mean í should put some bananas into my ass? D:
You: Yea. D:
You: we arr also goot at spellinh
You: wery goot
Stranger: ohkey
You: Weh spell tha best
You: Andf youo tood
You: Allso.. DON'T FORGET!! Poop is good ! :D
You: Tastes like chiken
Stranger: I luvf chjokolat <3
You: And we hate you.. D:
Stranger: fuck you ;o
You: Cause you runned away at 2 years old. D:
You: And took out 2357 of our soldiers.. D:
Stranger: oh noes
You: We're gonna hunt you don't this time.. D:
You: Your not gonna escape tha internetz!!
You: >:D
Stranger: OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!111 :OOOOOOOOOO
Stranger: *destroying the computer*
Stranger: *fatal error*
Stranger: *beeb beeb*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/code]
i am not very good at this shit.. >.>
[quote]Stranger: knock knock
You: who's there?
Stranger: disco
You: disco who?
Stranger: disconnect
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/quote]
[img]http://d2k5.com/sa_emots/emot-geno.gif[/img]
[quote]Stranger: hey
Stranger: y
You: Are you gay person I talked to earlier?
Stranger: no
Stranger: im
You: what
Stranger: straight as can be
You: It's not gay unless balls touch
Stranger: still im a girl
You: You like to touch balls?
Stranger: sure
You: Like
You: Hairy
You: or Non-Hairy
Stranger: doesnt matter y
You: AGE?
Stranger: 17
You: Damn
Stranger: what?
You: I'm 19 IT'S ILLEGAL
Stranger: whatever its not like im gonna say anything
You: So you put my hairy balls in your mouth?
Stranger: sure
You: Virgin?
Stranger: no
Stranger: only
Stranger: 1 though
You: FUCK. I DON'T WANT AIDS!
You have disconnected.[/quote]
Oh yeah!
[quote]Stranger: hey
You: Hey
Stranger: im a male with a big big big big dick
You: OH SHIT. ME TOO
You: COCK FIGHTR!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/quote]
[quote]Stranger: This is an FBl warning. This user has been flagged as a United States sex offender under the laws and factions 007z8 and 34g1k. FBl recommends not communicating with this user until IP address is tracked and federal custody takes charge. For more information, contact Omegle support.
Stranger: Hey
You: awesome
Stranger: What
You: nah nothing, just blurting out a random adjective
Stranger: Oh, ok.
Stranger: So how old are you?
You: old enough
Stranger: 18?
You: maybe
Stranger: I'm not really interested past 15 years old.
You: kk
Stranger: Do you have a sibling?
Stranger: Or young cousin perhaps
You: yes as a matter of fact i have a 14 year old little sister who loves to explore new ideas and tends to be a tad slutty
Stranger: Wow. Can I have your full address and phone number and her measurements?
You: sure thing my good man, let me fetch my quill
Stranger: k
You: fuck i'm out of ink
You: sorry, old bean
Stranger: Fuck.[/quote]
Message two shorts.
[quote]Stranger: Hey
You: otacon
You: i need some information about this snake
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/quote]
hahaha
[quote]You: hi
Stranger: hi i am 43 year old male from azerbaijan looking to discuss eddie murphy films
Stranger: earlier in his career preferably
You: kewllllllllll
You: eddie murphy was good
Stranger: what do you think of trading places?
You: meh
You: its alright
Stranger: raw
Stranger: RAW
Stranger: FUCK YOU EDDIE!
You: ?[/quote]
lol wut
[quote]Stranger: hello
You: If you had 2 gay friends that wanted to threesome with you..what would you do?
Stranger: i would say go find another gay guy
You: Why?
Stranger: Cuse im a female
Stranger: and if there gay
You: I'd do it. It's not gay unless balls touch.
Stranger: lmao
You: True.
Stranger: so wait if another guy had anal with some other guy but didnt touch his balls in the process what would you call that
You: Totally heterosexual sex with 2 men.
Stranger: lmao ok
Stranger: w.e
You: IT AIN'T GAY
You: UNLESS BALLS TOUCh
Stranger: your a dick
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/quote]
It ain't gay though...
I did my best to sound like a girl.
[quote]Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hi
You: Ohhh yeah baby.
You: R u horny?
Stranger: m/f
You: f
You: R u horny baby?
Stranger: frm
You: Wana text fuck?
You: It's really fun....
Stranger: frm
You: frm?
You: What's that mean?
Stranger: from where u r
You: Oh.
You: Texas.
You: Are u horny?
You: Wana fuck?
Stranger: yaaaaaaaaaaa
You: Cmon baby.
You: I slowly unzip your pants with my teeth....
Stranger: ohhhhhhhhhhh
You: I skillfully unbutton your pants and pull down your boxers
Stranger: after that
You: I see your throbbing erection.
You: I gracefully wrap my tounge around it.
Stranger: ohhhhhh
You: I stand up and get in the doggy fuck position...
Stranger: ohhh great
You: You slowly insert your dick in my vagina...
You: Slowly getting faster.
Stranger: yes
Stranger: ur boobs r niceeeeeee
You: My friend, rebecca comes in.....
Stranger: then
You: Me and her start french kissing....
You: While you keep fucking me.
Stranger: okkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
You: I get up to whisper to you....
You: "I'm a man."
You have disconnected.[/quote]
[code]You: you horny?
Stranger: hell yhea
Stranger: male or female
You: femme
Stranger: u mean female?
You: ya
Stranger: so r u really horny
You: ya ;)
Stranger: im really really horny
Stranger: ;)
You: hot
You: get into my cunt now
Stranger: im sexy
Stranger: ill shove my cock up ur vagina
Stranger: ;)
You: Stop! You violated the law. Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit.
Stranger: what
You: Stop! You violated the law. Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit.
Stranger: r u serious
You: Stop! You violated the law. Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit.
Stranger: are u serious
You: Have it your way.
You: /Slices stranger in half
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
[/code]
Oh that's a good un. ^
[code]Stranger: Hey
You: Stop! You violated the law. Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit.
Stranger: Wtf
You: Stop! You violated the law. Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit.[/code]
[code]Stranger: i like mathematic
You: Stop! You violated the law. Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit.
Stranger: D:
Stranger: We all violate the law once.
You: I didn't, hence why I am captain of the guard
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/code]
darma that was a damn good idea thanks man ahahaha
[QUOTE=chills2;16006517]Oh that's a good un. ^[/QUOTE]
Mine?
[QUOTE=CackaDeTaros;16006535]Mine?[/QUOTE]
Well it was going to be yours and then I got ninja posted so I read both of them, your's was good though. :v:
[quote]Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: m/f?
You: both
Stranger: whoa[/quote]
lololol
[QUOTE] Stranger: WILL YOU MARRY ME?
You: Yes dear
Stranger: dear?
Stranger: how old are you?
You: yup
You: 89
Stranger: oh
Stranger: im 103
You: I know
You: :D
Stranger: woa stalker much?
Stranger: so wanna get married?
You: Well we are getting married...
Stranger: okay cool
You: as long as you have the babies.
Stranger: can we get married before you die of cancer?
You: them fuckers hurt
Stranger: of course i will have the babies
Stranger: wait are you a girl?
You: no
Stranger: okay good
You: not heard of male pragnancy?
Stranger: no i've heard of it, i just dont think babies should be coming out of penis's
You: Yeah
Stranger: its just not right
You: hence why it hurts
Stranger: do you know how much it hurts to have a 10 pound object come out of you vagina???
You: yes
Stranger: you do?
You: Im a hermphridite
Stranger: omg i love you so much!
Stranger: i've always wanted to marry a hermphridite!
You: plus must babies are 5-9 punds
You: pounds
Stranger: my babies are FAT!
You: Haha
You: you had babies
You: ...
Stranger: yes i did
You: witohout me
Stranger: i have 6 so far
You: ;(
Stranger: well im a hooker, it happens
You: Meh
You: I dont care
You: im deperate
You: desperate*
Stranger: but we can make more babies
You: yeah sure
You: You dont have AIDS do you?
Stranger: not yet
You: Cool
Stranger: yeah
You: Ill give it you as our 1 year anniversary pressie then
Stranger: YAY!
You: <3
Stranger: <3
You: 4 eva & eva bb
You: XD
Stranger: XD
Stranger: omg im dying of cancer!!!
You: Nooooooooo
You: ;(
Stranger: :'(
You: Im gunna kill that bastard one day
Stranger: what bastard?
You: Cancer
Stranger: cancer isnt a person, its a disease, i think
You: oh
You: ..
You: damn
You: ok
You: uhh
Stranger: yeah
You: :S
You: Hmm
You: ill
You: does it have balls?
Stranger: no, it has a vagina
You: oh
You: does it hurt getting kicked in the vagina?
You: I forgot
Stranger: no
You: not been kicked there for a while
Stranger: but it does hurt getting scooped
You: Huh?
You: like
You: with an ice ceram scoop?
Stranger: when someone grabs you're boobs
You: oh
You: :D
You: you dont mind really though do you
Stranger: not at all
Stranger: :)
You: Ill just scoop cancer till it surrenders then
Stranger: wow you're a dumb ass
Stranger: *dies*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.l[/QUOTE]
I will miss her ;(. (Probebly a him XD)
Stranger: hello
You: hi
Stranger: asl ?
You: ?
You: wtf is asl
Stranger: age sex location
You: ok
You: 29/f/USA
Stranger: lol
You: lol
Stranger: you can be my mom
You: i be trolling
You: lololol
Stranger: lolololol
Stranger: ^^
Stranger: can i see you ?
Stranger: got pic ? :s
You: no
Stranger: sadface
You: im fucking male
Stranger: MILF
lol
[quote]Stranger: I AM NOT A GIRL NEITHER I HAVE BIG TITS FFS!!!!!!!!!
You: that's fine
You: is this Richard
You: are you Richard
You: I'm looking for Richard (euphism for Dick)
You: Richard is my little boy
You: I love him
You: One time, he got infected with rabies.
You: He was spouting white foam at the mouth.
You: I took him to the nurse
Your conversational partner has disconnected. [/quote]
I lol'd. I have a better one about Captain Ahab which I'll post later
[quote]Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hey babe
Stranger: what does your va-jay--jay look like
Stranger: swamp thing
Stranger: yea girl
Stranger: shake that asss
Stranger: dayum
You: I am a dude
Stranger: i got hard
You: u fgt
Stranger: hey dood
Stranger: what does your asshole look like
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: swamp thing
You: well
Stranger: shaaakkke that asss
Stranger: nigga
You: is liek green
Stranger: i just came
Stranger: peace
You: NO U
[/quote]
wtf
[quote]Stranger: hi
You: Hello there
You: Are you a stranger?
Stranger: I guess?
You: I am from united arab emirates, what does asl means?[/quote]
[quote]Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: I can't get an erection!
Stranger: what's wrong with me!?
You: OH FUCK!
You: HE CANT GET AN ERECTION?
You: maybe....
Stranger: I'm only 15!
You: Only maybe...
You: MAYBE UR GAY!
Stranger: no
Stranger: could it be cause I don't have a dick?
You: OMG I AM 14 AND I AM HAVING A ERECTION RITE NAO!
Stranger: do you think that has something to do with it?
You: No
You: Nonsense
Stranger: ok
You: Tell me
You: Do you liek bewbs?
Stranger: fuck off
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/quote]
What the....
[quote]Stranger: ayy gurlll
You: I LUH DUH PUSSAY
Stranger: when you gon let me tap dat ass
You: when you gon let me ass dat tap
Stranger: HOL FUCK
U RUINT MY BRANE[/quote]
lol
[quote]Stranger: Hi, I am Frank, 22, german, male looking for a nice girl... Can it be you?
You: nope[/quote]
hahaha
[quote]Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hello there
You: Tony, did you get the package?
Stranger: yea,i got it man!
You: Great
You: Is the police giving you trouble?
Stranger: yea,but i lost them,what should i do with package
You: Okay
You: In pier 11
You: there is a guy
You: called "Sam Tilgan"
You: Tall, skinny
Stranger: yea,should i give it to him
You: Give him the package, and he'll give you the payment
You: Remember the special instructions
You: Do you remember it?
Stranger: no
You: Cut the pizza on isoseles triangles
Stranger: oh,yep i remember now,havnt much memory now after all those years of drugs
You: Yeah......
Stranger: ok,where do you want me to drop the payment off to?
You: In Main st.
You: Another guy
Stranger: oh,shit the cops are onto me againn!!!!
You: Wait....
Stranger: gotta run!!!!
You: What?
You: GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE SON[/quote]
Do i has sumthing?
[quote]Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: A wild pickachu appears
You: Pickachu uses thunderbolt
Stranger: Ratatat
Stranger: dodges
Stranger: Ratatat uses quick flash
Stranger: ITS SUPER EFFECTIVE
Stranger: CHARLIE GET TO THE CHOPPA!
You: PICACHU USES SPARK
You: IS SUPPER EFECTIVE
You: CRITICAL HIT
Stranger: OHH NO EVEERYONES EHSPLODING!
You: WTFD U HAVE DONE
You: UR RATATAT DIVIDED BY ZERO
Stranger: NO!!!
1
Stranger: WHY EDWARD CULLEN WHY!!!
You: 7/0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: NOT LIKING TWILIGHT
You: MY ,MUM FORCED MEH TO WATCH IT
Stranger: books are soo much better
You: WHY MOM, WHY!????????????????????????????????????????????????Ç
Stranger: i didn't like it eiather
Stranger: till i read thebooks
You: I read the books too
You: but i couldnt finished them
You: the movie spoiled it
Stranger: they've made one
Stranger: read the rest
You: I cant
You: I am poor
Stranger: you poor man=(
You: I am using neighbors internet
Stranger: see what i did tharr :D
You: well
You: I HERD U LIEK MUDKEEPZ
You: MUDKEEP USES WATER GUN
You: is sufer efective
You: SUPER*
Stranger: NO CHARZARD!
Stranger: U HOE GOGO BULASAUR
You: GET BACK MUDKEEP
You: GO MISIGNO
You: MISSIGNO USES DEBUG ATACK
You: *It reset ur pokedex*
You: *
You: *Also divides by zero(again)
Stranger: stupid new pokemon original were much better
You: LOL
You: Misigno is a buged pokemon
Stranger: ahh
You: It appears on red an blue
You: But i have to agree
Stranger: GO SUICUNE!AND ENTE
You: More generations=more gayer
Stranger: MOLTRESS GOGO
Stranger: yeah
You: NO !!!
You: GO MEWTOW AND HOOH
You: AND REGIGIGAS
You: or regiGAYgas
Stranger: GO MEW
You: MEWTOW USE PHYSIC ON SUICUNE
You: I MEAN
You: ON MEW
Stranger: MEW BITCHSLAPS MEWTOW
You: IS SUPER EFECTIVE
You: REGIGAYGAS USES GAY 4 GEN ATACK ON MOLTRESS
Stranger: lol
Stranger: brb playing WoW
You: WoW...
You: It is cool?
You: I really want to play it
Stranger: yeah its fun
You: But the idea of paying a subcription.....
You: just....
You: It isnt fair...
You: Is there a retail version?
Stranger: no
You: OH snap....
Stranger: im bored bye
Stranger: nice talking
You: bai
You: posting this on facepunch
Stranger: lol ok
Stranger: i want link
You: k
You: [url]www.facepunch.com[/url]
Stranger: i was goign to post this ion ungie.net
Stranger: on bungie.net*
You: well....
You: See ya , good sir.
Stranger: bye
You have disconnected
[/quote]
[quote]Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: 17, f, florida, US
You: u?
Stranger: 19 M New York, FL
Stranger: jk
Stranger: 19 M, New York, US
You: oh
You: that's cool, i love new york
Stranger: nice
You: you live in the city?
Stranger: are you horny?
You: well right now my bf is in the bathroom :\
Your conversational partner has disconnected.[/quote]
I couldn't stop laughing at how fast he d/ced after I said that hahaha
[quote]You: OH SAY CAN YOU SEE
You: BY THE DAWNS EARLY LIGHT
Stranger: OH CANADAAAAAAAA
Stranger: OUR HOME AND NATIVE LAND
You: IT BUUUUUUUUUUUUURRNSSSS
You: TO A WHITE ASH
You: AND LAUGHING AT
You: THE TOOOOOOOOOOP
You: IS THE U OF S OF A
Stranger: MUHAHAHAHA
You: HAHAHAHA
Stranger: MICHEAL JACKSON IS DEAD
You: NO WAY!
Stranger: I KNOWWWWWWWWWW
You: SO IS ABRAHAM LINCOLN
You: !!!!
Stranger: WOWOWOWOWOWOWW
You: I KNOW RITE!!!
Stranger: BILLIE JEAN IS NOT MY LOVERRRR
You: BUT IS MY HUMPEEEEER
Stranger: OOOOOOO
You: BUUURN
Stranger: YEAHHHHH
Stranger: MJ' HAIR
Stranger: GOT BURNED
You: HORACHIO THE CAMERA MAN AND THE MODEL IS DEAD
Stranger: AHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHA WHAT THE HELLL ARE YOU SAYING!?!??!
You: I GUESS THEY....
You: *PUTS ON SUNGLASSES*
You: FINISHED SHOOTING
You: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Stranger: AMAAAAZING
You: WHAT
Stranger: YOU CANT HEAR ME?
Stranger: IM SCREAMING?!?!!
You: WHAT?!?
You: SHITTTT
You: WALLS ARE BLUEE
You: NOTHING CAN DO
You: BUT EAT SOME STEWWW
Stranger: BRAIN STEW
You: DRAIN DAWGS
You: JUST LIKE THE DORITO BAG
Stranger: ...
You: GO ON
Stranger: I AM IRON MAAAAN
You: IS HE LIVE OR DEAD
You: *DRUM SOLO*
You: IM SORRY BUT YOU HAMSTER HAS TERMINAL FLU
Stranger: MY HAMSTER DIEEEES
Stranger: DIEED*
You: I BROUGHT HIM BACK TO LIVE
You: AND GAVE HIM AIDS
Stranger: POOOOKIE, ARE YOUUUU THERE?!?!
You: HE CANT HERE YOU OVER THE MACHINE
Stranger: OOOO THE MACHINE
Stranger: SHINNY
You: IT GIVES PEOOPLE AIDSSSSSSSSSS
Stranger: WHY TAKE DIET PILLS, WHEN YOU CAN ENJOY AIDS
You: SO IT DOESNT MAKE MY ORANGE JUICE ALL PULPY
Stranger: I AGREE
Stranger: ...
You: WHY WONT YOU LEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE
Stranger: I DONT KNOWWW
You: ASK THE TRASH CANS
Stranger: OKAY
Stranger: THEY SAY HI
You: COOL TELL THEM TO DROP ME A LIIIIIIIINE
Stranger: GOT IT
You have disconnected.[/quote]
This one went weird fast.
[quote]Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: heyy
You: sup
Stranger: nmnmnmnm
Stranger: just chillinn
You: me too
Stranger: didn't really fucking ask now did i?
Stranger: no...because i don't give a shit
Stranger: fagtard
You: wtf
You: ?
??????????????????????
Stranger: yep don't play dumb with me boy?
You: wtf
Stranger: it's your dad
Stranger: GET OUT OF YOUR ROOM RIGHT NO!
You: my dad is on the phone
Stranger: *NOW!
Stranger: don't tell me what to do son
You: i can see him doing loundry
You: BITCH FUCK YOU
Stranger: IF YOU DON'T COME RIGHT NOW
Stranger: ILL DO WHAT I DID TO YOUR BROTHER
You: UR NOT MY MOM FUCK FACE
Stranger: LOLRAPE
Stranger: gurkadurr
You: ASSFUCK
Stranger: its me son
Stranger: fucktard, it's your dad
You: NO ITS NOT
Stranger: quit being so homo and come outside right this instence
Stranger: DO IT
Stranger: COME OUT OF THE CLOSET!
You: LIESSSSSSSSSSSS
You: FUCK U
You: ITS ALL UR FAULT
You: ASSTARD
Stranger: your moms vag
Stranger: is purple
You: UR VAG
You: FUCK UR SELF WITH A STRAPON
Stranger: how dare you talk to me like that boy?
You: BITCH
You: COME HERE
Stranger: ill slap you silly
Stranger: you come here homo
You: ILL FUCKING CUT U U FUCKING CUNTBAG
Stranger: ill teach you a lesson
You: BITCH
Stranger: right now son
You: FUCK
You: YU
Stranger: hey sally
Stranger: fuck you boy
You: who is sally
Stranger: you
You: COME HERE
Stranger: you're a girl
Stranger: fagtard
You: FUCKING CUT UR VAGINA OPEN
Stranger: HEY DONT TELL ME WAT TO DO FUCKER
You: FUCK U
Stranger: IM YOUR DAD
You: UR NOT MY MOM
Stranger: RESPECT ME HO
Stranger: yes I AM
You: BIIIIIIIIIITCH
Stranger: HEY FAGGOT GO LICK YOUR MOTHER'S FOETID, CANCEROUS LABIA DRY
Stranger: HOMO[/quote]
:c00l:
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