Experiences with mentally handicapped children (a.k.a. Derp Kids Say The Darndest Things) - General

little chinese girl with downs, same age as I was back then, playing at the pool. Doesn't know how to swim and parents aren't watching her. She sees a slide and goes down it. To her surprise she went into the water, parents started freaking out and didn't know what to do. Life guard was no where in site, I jumped in a pulled her to the edge of the pool and got her out. The parents are the real retards.

[QUOTE=shatteredwindow;30171110]There is this one retarded Russian kid who everyone hates and he is a dick. He was in my table for science class a couple years ago. He and the person sitting next to me were argueing about something, and one thing led to another, and the retarded kid flicked a booger at him. And it landed right in his eye. He has fucking damn super powers, patent and sell that homing technology to the military. Anyway it was extremely scary because if I was only a foot to my left or he missed a foot to his right, that could have been my eye. I have no idea how my table neighbor didn't kill him on the spot. [editline]31st May 2011[/editline] Rate me winner, no one has a better story than me.[/QUOTE] Where do you live? I think I remember that. PM me.

Had a special needs girl in at the theatre today. As I wheeled her to her seat she was making a little bit of noise, so I warned her mother that the show featured some loud noises like gunfire and bombs, and that I or another usher would be waiting at the back ready to help if it was too much for her and she needed a break. In other words, if she started screaming during the show we'd need to take her outside until she'd calmed sown. Throughout the first act we didn't hear a peep from her. Great, she's enjoying the show. An hour later during interval I checked up on her, and the mother said "The gunshots were pretty loud but she was fine." I then turned to the daughter and said with a smile "Yes you've been behaving very well haven't you?" At that moment she let out the most demonic ear-bleeding scream I have ever heard in my life. Half the audience turned to look in our direction, and suddenly as if the mother had pressed a magic "stop screaming" button, she stopped, smiled and said "I LIKE SHOW." That made my week.

[QUOTE=Jimesu_Evil;30259598]Had a special needs girl in at the theatre today. As I wheeled her to her seat she was making a little bit of noise, so I warned her mother that the show featured some loud noises like gunfire and bombs, and that I or another usher would be waiting at the back ready to help if it was too much for her and she needed a break. In other words, if she started screaming during the show we'd need to take her outside until she'd calmed sown. Throughout the first act we didn't hear a peep from her. Great, she's enjoying the show. An hour later during interval I checked up on her, and the mother said "The gunshots were pretty loud but she was fine." I then turned to the daughter and said with a smile "Yes you've been behaving very well haven't you?" At that moment she let out the most demonic ear-bleeding scream I have ever heard in my life. Half the audience turned to look in our direction, and suddenly as if the mother had pressed a magic "stop screaming" button, she stopped, smiled and said "I LIKE SHOW." That made my week.[/QUOTE] Best story ever.

A derp kid in my comprehensive school was bending over a bench when another derp kid came over and tried to ass rape him, and another time a morbidly obese derp kid belly flopped and nearly crushed to death this other derp kid. Good times :')

About 5 years ago this derp kid from my school came to a rummage of ours and licked my brothers gameboy game, which his mom bought as an apology

My school is right next to a retard school, one time I was looking over into their playground and I saw about 5 five derps tie another one to a tree, a couple minutes later one of their teachers came out saw what that they had done and tried to untie the one tied to the tree, but as she was doing this one of the retards that tied that kid up bit her on the arm. It was hell of a lot more funny than it sounds. Also the retard school is called Walnuts. [img]http://www.milton-keynes.gov.uk/mkgrowth/images/walnut_school.JPG[/img] [editline]5th June 2011[/editline] Its funny because they are nuts (as in crazy)

[QUOTE=HazzaHardie;30262608]My school is right next to a retard school, one time I was looking over into their playground and I saw about 5 five derps tie another one to a tree, a couple minutes later one of their teachers came out saw what that they had done and tried to untie the one tied to the tree, but as she was doing this one of the retards that tied that kid up bit her on the arm. It was hell of a lot more funny than it sounds. Also the retard school is called [b][u]Walnuts[/b][/u]. [img]http://www.milton-keynes.gov.uk/mkgrowth/images/walnut_school.JPG[/img] [editline]5th June 2011[/editline] Its funny because they are nuts (as in crazy)[/QUOTE] :wtc:

There's this one guy at my school who has some syndrome or disorder or w/e. Whenever he's in the yard he just walks in circles, and every now and then he starts slapping his hand and then running, as if he's some sort of vehicle and he's starting his engine. He also acts just like a teacher and he tries to break up fights by saying that he's going to have to call their parents. Once when he was a bit late for class and the door closed just before he reached it, he started crying really loudly and banging on the door yelling "NOOO", kind of like in a movie when the main characters partner dies.

[QUOTE=FreakySoup;30218668]Who is Chris-Chan and what are his sexual and angry sides like[/QUOTE] He is the Tard-King. You don't want to see his sexual sides. EVER. [editline]5th June 2011[/editline] Some downs can be very friendly, I like those ones. I get scared the larger shouty ones may attempt to rape me, after a prior event where a whale mounted me. Thank god I was 12 and he was 10, or he may have succeeded. [editline]5th June 2011[/editline] The ULTIMATE in Tard entertainment. [url]http://www.fullduplex.org/tardblog/[/url]

I am on my high school wrestling team and I had a match were I had to wrestle a :downs: kid. I felt bad because he was a tard and because it was his first varsity match. So I walk out on the mat, not particularly pumped up because I didn't expect to have much difficulty. Then he walks out and I remember thinking to myself "Holy shit! His arms are fucking HUGE!" He wasn't extremely short but he was below average height. But goddamn he was built. The match starts and he has the most awkward stance so I just go for his completely unprotected legs and take him down. He then just stands back up with what felt like no effort what so ever. He stands up as if I wasn't even on top of him trying to hold him down. I then take him down again and he stands up again just for me to take him down again. This continued for the next six minutes after which I was so fucking tired I had to lay down for the rest of the meet. I later learned that, in addition to being mentally handicapped, he had some weird condition where he couldn't feel pain and therefor could push his muscles farther than most other people can. That explains why he was so strong. I still won the match and I still felt bad about it because he didn't know a lot of moves and all he really did was stand up over and over again, but fuck was I gassed by the end of the third period.

I've seen quite a few funny moments involving derp kids at my school. A couple years ago one of the derp kids went up to a group of girls and said "LADIES!!!!!" and tried to touch them. Another day one of the derp kids was running through the hallways making dinosaur sounds.

Is it me or are most of these stories with guys and not girls? Anyways story: In 5th grade our class was in the computer lab and this derp girl was on the computer next to me. The macs at the school was slow as all fuck so when it didn't load, I said that it froze and she completely flipped her shit. She started screeching, pounding on the keyboard, hitting the monitor, she picks up her chair and throws it, and keep in mind, this chair is heavy as fuck. I being in fifth grade am just cracking up, the teacher is also flipping a shit and panicing, shouting for everyone to get out. We all get out and through the windows we can see the girl freaking out and the teacher trying to keep her in control. Needless to say, it was an interesting rest of the year with her.

well we had one special kid in our class, when we were young he was just silly, like did tests with an empty pen and was stupid overall when we started woodwork class or w/e he became dangerous as he threw knives in the ceiling and then ran away from under them

[QUOTE=Garik;30256085]Once when i was kicking one autistic kids ass, he said at the end. "This game isn't fun, it hurts"[/QUOTE] Seems to me like [I]you're[/I] the one with mental problems if you're going around beating up on kids with learning disabilities for no reason.

Is it possible to make assholism stories a bannable offense? because we really need 'asshole" to be a bannable offense on FP, and this thread has shown a few posts that demonstrate this.

A kid in my class, ever since Infant school, would spent every free moment of his time reading maps. Maps of anything, Atlas', AA maps, London underground maps. Any map he could get his hands on. One time a friend of mine was trying to talk to him to find out about some homework in the School library. Mapboy ignored him so my friend tapped the cover of his book and Mapboy stood up in his chair, flipped the table over and roared; "FUCK OFF RICHARD! JUST FUCK OFF! I'M TRYING TO FUCKING READ A MAP!" So fucking hilarious. He also kept smacking girls asses, any girl, it was all fair game.

Holy shit, I just remembered an asshole form the 3rd grade. How do I remember he's from the third grade? So we're in school after lunch, and we're all lined up. There's a fence dividing this small area where they had us line up, which was next to the entire playground area. On one side was us, the regular school, the other side the special needs kids. So there's this one girl who goes up to the gate where me and him were standing (together? i can't remember. he wasn't too friendly.) And she starts calling him. So (my memory is REALLY fuzzy) and she says something like "HEY COWHEAD" (his head was really big actually) and this whole retarded conversation ensues, and I just remember this one quote he said at the end "that's why you're in special ed and I'M in third grade" I couldn't remember if it was funny or not.

[QUOTE=cyclocius;30271483]A kid in my class, ever since Infant school, would spent every free moment of his time reading maps. Maps of anything, Atlas', AA maps, London underground maps. Any map he could get his hands on. One time a friend of mine was trying to talk to him to find out about some homework in the School library. Mapboy ignored him so my friend tapped the cover of his book and Mapboy stood up in his chair, flipped the table over and roared; "FUCK OFF RICHARD! JUST FUCK OFF! I'M TRYING TO FUCKING READ A MAP!" So fucking hilarious. He also kept smacking girls asses, any girl, it was all fair game.[/QUOTE] hahahaha

There was one who used to ride out bus who was always stuck in a movie. If anyone had to sit with him, he would scream "GET OUT OF MY SWAMP" like in Shrek. He once said abruptly "Kill the brown people", which I never figured out where he got it from. But this kid also recites lines after lines of various Disney movies, shit amazes me.

[QUOTE=cyclocius;30271483]A kid in my class, ever since Infant school, would spent every free moment of his time reading maps. Maps of anything, Atlas', AA maps, London underground maps. Any map he could get his hands on. One time a friend of mine was trying to talk to him to find out about some homework in the School library. Mapboy ignored him so my friend tapped the cover of his book and Mapboy stood up in his chair, flipped the table over and roared; "FUCK OFF RICHARD! JUST FUCK OFF! I'M TRYING TO FUCKING READ A MAP!" So fucking hilarious. He also kept smacking girls asses, any girl, it was all fair game.[/QUOTE] He also spent all of Prom on his phone, texting his mum and updating his facebook. Kinda sad.

[QUOTE=cyclocius;30271894]He also spent all of Prom on his phone, texting his mum and updating his facebook. Kinda sad.[/QUOTE] [img]http://www.wearmeme.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/wearmeme-forever-alone-black.jpg[/img]

Well, one time I was walking in the hallway and this one kid walks up to me and shouts "Hey!", not in a commanding tone though. I say hey, and he immediately starts babbling about random things. He speech is nowhere near comprehensible, so I just say "yeah" whenever he looks at me. He was trying to be social, and I said "I'm Corey, hope to see you again sometime". I think he said his name was Thomas or something. I can't remember the name, but I could remember hearing it right. He shuffled off as I walked off to the rest room. Poor guy.

[QUOTE=Corey_Faure;30271978]Well, one time I was walking in the hallway and this one kid walks up to me and shouts "Hey!", not in a commanding tone though. I say hey, and he immediately starts babbling about random things. He speech is nowhere near comprehensible, so I just say "yeah" whenever he looks at me. He was trying to be social, and I said "I'm Corey, hope to see you again sometime". I think he said his name was Thomas or something. I can't remember the name, but I could remember hearing it right. He shuffled off as I walked off to the rest room. Poor guy.[/QUOTE] My name's Corey too :buddy:

[QUOTE=areolop;30171299]Large Picture inbound! [img_thumb]http://files.sharenator.com/triforce3_4chan_Triforce_Prank-s2262x5000-44015.png[/img_thumb] [sp]sorry, fucking thumb's dont work.[/sp][/QUOTE] Are there any more stories like this?

There is this one kid at my school who has a rat tail (really thin pony tail) that goes to his fucking knees and is legally blind. He tries to make sexual advances on other boys and screams, "OUTTA MY WAY LOSERS," when walking through the hall.

A friend of mine works at my girlfriend's college campus cafeteria. A mentally challenged girl was behind the counter cleaning something near the fruit stand. Suddenly a black student came and too 3 or 4 bananas. Almost immediately the girl shouted "HEY, Where you goin' with all dem bananas, monkey?" She was just trying to be clever or something i guess and not trying to be racist at all. I lol'd all day about it.

I remember last year i knew some girl who had autism or something. She asked me this random question once in my class which was "What is up with flavoured and coloured condoms?". I couldn't stop laughing. She cried after that. I felt really bad :(

Apparently, my friend [del](lol)[/del] rubbed shit on his brother's bedroom wall when he was 4, and went back to sleep. He was found out because his hand was still covered in shit. [i]He didn't even wash his hand[/i]. Guess he was caught brown-handed.

[QUOTE=Garik;30256085]Once when i was kicking one autistic kids ass, he said at the end. "This game isn't fun, it hurts"[/QUOTE] Asshole move. I'm autistic myself (I'm not boasting I am, because I'd rather not be specifically because of stereotypes like these) and shit like this makes me cringe. Though how 'bad' it is differs with everyone. On second thought I think I should NOT have posted this, I just don't want to start a giant fucking shitstorm over nothing. Have one of my stories. Quite a long time ago I used to be at some aspergers (Assburgers if you will, if you're really that much of a jerk) camp or something, in other words, full of derps (probably including myself because I was pretty young back there). There was this one kid who just wouldn't stop playing Pokemon even though we invited him to come play with us. Some night I couldn't sleep, and neither could the guys I used to hang around alot with. I figured we could get this kid to play with us if we showed him how much of a Pokemon obsessed guy he really is. So I hid his pokemon games all around the derpcamp, literally every spot I could find, whether it be the kitchen, the toilet, whatever. He also had one of those rubber clubs with him, so when we were done hiding his games, we hit him straight in the head with it. It was an asshole move alright. He woke up and he started throwing anything within arms reach around all over the place. This is where shit hit the fan, because everyone woke up and eventually everyone in the room started throwing with stuff, waking everyone in the camp up. I don't remember much from this point and on, but I do know they didn't like it.