My home's smoke alarm was broken so my mother tied a cow to the ceiling and it was ordered to moo three times in a row if it senses fire.
Then, I went swimming with my friends. The diving board bent too easily. Francesca, who was in a revealing green bikini, told me to leave the diving board alone. I looked down and saw that I was wearing tight white swim briefs. I jumped into the warm water and I don't remember the rest.
My family and I were in a department store. Suddenly people freak out and run away from something. It turned out to be a skunk with a short but cat like tail. After it passed, I hear something. I turn and look and see a tiny kitten with a long skunk like tail. My mother picked up the kitten and said "we're keeping it", then I woke up.
A non-descript friend of mine came to visit, telling me, he hired a hooker. And sure enough, the door bell rings, I open it aaand...
It turns out to be a short naked black dude with a huge mohawk and the most soulless look on his face.
I was in someone's house and I saw on a mantle that there were a bunch of pictures. I started looking at them and and one stood out - it was just a black and white picture of a girl with dark hair, maybe 18 ish, smiling into the camera. I just remember staring at it for the longest time with an overwhelming mix of emotions.
This dream wouldn't have been so weird except that I've had recurring dreams of a girl with dark hair since like 4th grade
Me and a bunch of people I know from school, all completely unrelated (friend groups, subjects etc) all went on a school trip to see a speech in a park without any teachers. But the speech was canceled when we arrived and the bus driver wouldn't arrive to take us back until later that day, so we stole a bus.
Someone apparently shot the leader of Islamic State before I was able to.
I also remember being a girl who had her own sister. After class, she started to follow me. I no-clipped upstairs but she still followed me. Then I asked her if she wanted to play.
"No, sorry, you lead me here!" she said and left.
I had a dream a few nights ago where my math teacher had a substitute. He was a really attractive man with a little bit of stubble.
I had a question to ask him, so he leaned in really close until his cheek was touching my cheek. I could feel his stubble and it was rly weird. I forgot what I was planning to ask him, and instead I told him "If it wasn't for disappointment, I wouldn't have any appointments" which is from a song I had been thinking about.
He stood up straight and smiled, then he told me I needed to go back to sleep.
Two giant eyeballs floating in the air while I sit down on the beach and also some clouds with a chance of lightning.
These three girls I know were naked at a table and showing off their vaginas. I forget which girls they were but I have a pretty good idea about two of them.
I wanted to destroy a group of androids so I decided to become one by flushing myself down the toilet. My friend Rachel called me just when I entered the secret lair.
I built an enormous kite, and flew all the way to the stratosphere with it. I then donned a parachute, jumped off and fucked a hot chick while falling to the earth. After landing I still continued fucking
I was picking cotton
The Jubilee Line was extended to some place called Ornicopter. I decided to buy a bag of flying saucers in the local corner shop and just when I was going to pay, the Indian cashier decided to call my mother and ask for "Sarah Budu". The cashier caught me looking at her, so she stole my iPhone from my hands and put it in the safe deposit box.
"No-one must know I prank vulnerable middle aged women," she said. I tried to fight her but I woke up.
Then, I dreamed about a part two. I got the iPhone and the bag of flying saucers and I quickly ran to the Ornicopter tube station. As I knew it was a dream, I summoned the cashier's phone and saw that her number was seemingly 123456789 to people who she calls but the actual number was different.
I was back in primary school and before I could have my first lesson, I had to say that being around nice people will allow me to make friends "mediumly". But the teacher anyway let me in for saying "easily".
Some guy in the back was playing "Where's your uniform?" for the entire class. When class was over, a guy called Tommy and I decided to climb the school walls.
"Hey, look! That's Skyrim!" he said.
"Wow, one day I'm so going there. It looks so majestic!" I heard myself say. Then, I woke up.
My name was stanley, I was in a parable.
(I looked up too many videos of that game.)
All I remember from my dream last night is eating the "Sinner's Sandwich" from Deadly Premonition. Then I think the Titanic happened, not sure about that last part.
A long plot adventure in a fantasy world, where I was in a party of five. I was a wizard, and one of my old classmates was a buff as fuck warrior, then there were two chicks we met on the way who were also wizards, and another dude that was the "Leader" of the group, think he was a paladin.
The dream was essentially exploring dungeons and travelling the world with hints of romance and bravery. It was extremely exciting and fun.
I had to check my girlfriend for autism :v
I wish I could remember the first one, I forgot it except for that I woke up with an adrenaline rush. I remember climbing and flashing lights
I do remember the second one though. I was downtown and waiting for my ride to show up. After a while I come to the conclusion they aren't coming and I hitch-hike. A car pulls up that looks like the one I was waiting for. Walking up to the car I see it's being driven by two identical old ladies who offered to drop me off at my house. I get in and give directions, but I notice that they weren't going anywhere I said. They then turn to me and explain that they planned to drive the car straight into the ocean and kill all of us. I start panicking and try to open the door. Eventually I kick it open and contemplate jumping out onto the freeway. As I jump out, the whole dream is revealed to be a TV show, being watched by me. As the credits roll I change the channel and watch a Simpsons Halloween special.
Had quite the awful dream...
I had two blemishes on my hand, they appeared quite large and full of puss. Upon repeated prompting from a relative I decided to give them a squeeze and to my horror massive amounts of material which I can only describe as cream cheese with a rancid smell began leaking from the blemishes. When I had about a hand full worth of 'pus' it stopped, but my hand looked rather deflated and I could see bones and muscles and tendons through the holes. Then the worst bit happened, my skin fell apart by itself and hung limp like rubbery chicken skin.
I made a quick drawing of the zits and the seams where my flesh ripped open:
[IMG]http://s15.postimg.org/wvyiqxqhn/horror.png[/IMG]
At this point I was in pain and distressed, and asked my mother to take me to a hospital. Instead of taking me to a hospital however she insisted she would take me to my uncles's house out in the country because he "Had a lot of practice sewing up animals". The ride was bumpy because we took all back roads, I spent most of it holding my hand together so I wouldn't get stuff in it.
We arrived late at night and they made me sleep until the morning, I woke up and I was sharing a bed with a foal and it shit some large turds for such a little animal. I didn't want to risk infection by handing the mess so I grabbed the closest thing I could find, a spatula and spent quite a bit of time flushing all this down a toilet. While I was busy with that my mother had taken the shit covered spatula and made everyone breakfast with it.
Then I woke up, thank Christ.
Acne/zit/injury dreams are so surreal.
I was in a Transformers film and I had to destroy an evil fashion designer or I would be crushed by the Transformers. So I killed her and put her body in a bag, when I was tempted to loot everything she had in her room.
Her cleaner came in and started to bin the body bag but I told her not to. After I finished taking her stuff, I went to the fashion store where the woman was a manager to break the news. Bumblebee noticed that I was going to do this and he stopped me from doing it.
"She was encouraging the mutation of our kind. Let them be ignorant."
I dropped off the unlootable bags in the store.
Then there was some crazy action scene between a Russian man and a whole army of Transformers. After he was defeated, the Transformers flew off after saying goodbye to me.
The credits rolled and the film was apparently called "Transformers: Fashion Victims". Then, I woke up.
[QUOTE=fudge blood;47679308]I had to check my girlfriend for autism :v[/QUOTE]
Don't leave us in suspense what was my diagnosis
I found a HL3 leak in 2022.
Had a few dreams which I surprisingly remember.
1) There was a war going on or something, I found some old house got inside, barricaded it and there was working computer with internet. So I put blanked over my head and monitor so that nobody from outside sees there is someone inside.
I heard a knock on door, looked carefully - it was anakin from skywalker as a kid, he didn't have lightsaber though so I didn't open, I thought it's some kind of trick.
Then I heard another knock, looked, it was 2 rebels from HL2, still didn't trust this shit.
Then I moved to different location, found a 9 floor building and went to the very top apartment, barricaded it and sat there. Then I heard over some kind of street megaphone somebody setting bounty on me so bullets were constantly flying into my window.
Then everything was calm, I went on facepunch and in hardware and software thread, some guy posted two photos of the girls I know irl and said something about them, I was writing reply:
"omg dude, you are such a creep, I know them irl, I went to school with them for 8 years..."
Then I woke up.
These girls were going around topless for #FreeTheNipple so I took a selfie with them
[QUOTE=Tone Float;47685222]These girls were going around topless for #FreeTheNipple so I took a selfie with them[/QUOTE]
#FreeTheNipple? Sure they're not naturists?
I died and became a skeleton ghost. Since I was dead, I thought it'd be fun to go exploring the world. I grabbed our cat and placed it on my head as a companion. We camped out at some plains. I found a bicycle and flew with it because ghosts give no fucks about gravity.
Landed near a library and there were many old classmates there. Then an earthquake happened and a massive landslide came rumbling down from a nearby hill that instantly killed everyone. But because I was a skeleton ghost, I just resurrected back in time, a few minutes before the landslide. I evacuated everyone and the landslide destroyed the empty library.
[QUOTE=Orkel;47686644]I died and became a skeleton ghost. Since I was dead, I thought it'd be fun to go exploring the world. I grabbed our cat and placed it on my head as a companion. We camped out at some plains. I found a bicycle and flew with it because ghosts give no fucks about gravity.
Landed near a library and there were many old classmates there. Then an earthquake happened and a massive landslide came rumbling down from a nearby hill that instantly killed everyone. But because I was a skeleton ghost, I just resurrected back in time, a few minutes before the landslide. I evacuated everyone and the landslide destroyed the empty library.[/QUOTE]
I wish I had those superpowers in dreams, I always get dreams where I am... well one of those who gets killed by natural events.
no joke i dreamed about phoning up virgin media and complaining till they finally got my bill right
#britishdreams
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