Bizarre, but memorable stuff you've said while "messed up"
52 replies, posted
at McDonalds last night. My friend works there and we just walk in a cool, and I'm like "Whoa. You're a seagull", and then he started to make seagull noises and then I apparently freaked the fuck out. :v:
[QUOTE=dutchah;23226916]Going to the macdonalds with a drunk friend (the guy behind the counter was nice enough to play along and not go all serious):
'Hey fuckface, gimme some food'
'Sir, could you phrase that differently please?'
(over the top) 'Excuse me, dear sir fuckface, would you be so kind as to hand me some consumables after which I will pay you with currency, old chap?'[/QUOTE]
Thanks, you've made my day. Rated polite.
[QUOTE=Sonicfan574;23244222]Thanks, you've made my day. Rated polite.[/QUOTE]
brazil is not in africa
After getting my ass kicked for trying to stop a mugging, my friend, who's way shorter than me tried to drag me home. The funniest thing I said apparently taht let her drop me from laughter was, "You know...flying can be sexual too."
we were looking at a screen whilst on weed
and harris was all like "dude its like 1 big square!"
and i was like "i thinks its called a pixel"
and he turned around and sayd "YOUR A PIXEL FAGGOT!!!"
and then yeh we laughed for hours
I went into a McDonald's high as a fuckin' kite, just said hello to the guy at the counter then sat at a table and made statues out of the napkins.
[editline]09:18PM[/editline]
guess i really didn't say anything but it was funny
Friend: dude your gay
Me: Yes
Me: Wait, what?
I get tired at night.
"Fuck the pig, I hate it."
"I mean, once you get a black eye, you can't get another one"
"Is this tongue huge? Like I mean, is this like too big of a tongue? Because that's what I've heard."
‎"I named my dick 'Shifty McGuilicutty' and have no regrets in life"
"I need a mail-order Hobo so I can beat the fuck out of him with my
baseball bat. Jesus christ I am so damn mad right now."
"If she didn't want to get beat, she shouldn't have been a whore."
Once I and a friend and some other guys went to a McDonalds drunk.
We tried to use the drive-thru by pretending to be in a car.
Needless to say, they didn't serve us.
-snip-
Post from another thread
[quote=Killerkyogre]I sleep talk sometimes as well, apparently one time, I fell asleep downstairs, my brother told me to go to bed and I said, "The advanced duplicator files are downstairs." He told me to go to bed again and I went ape shit, I said "You don't understand!" and slapped him (I don't know why I did that ) then I stormed upstairs to my bed, He was very confused until I explained.[/quote]
I've never laughed so hard at a thread.
Me and my buds were walking around town, and we stopped at a mcdonalds. Instead of going inside, my friend decided to order from the drive thru.
After ordering he then walked up to the drive thru window and he was like "sup".
"jesus forgives you but I still think your a cunt"
guys i think my face has officially turned into saran wrap
I was half asleep when i grabbed some keys on the table next to me and said something among the lines of: "Here are the grey keys, do you want me to go around on the airport bragging about them?"
[QUOTE=Jeep-Eep;23231502]My first post in that open-source aerospace thread. I had a cold. My brain always goes to shit when I have one.[/QUOTE]
These?
[QUOTE=Jeep-Eep;23106350]Frankly unnerving more-like. Those damn things could easily K-kill Terra. Not to mention saying: We are here aliens. Those things would be visible for light-years. I'd rather avoid advertising our position, at least for a while yet.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Jeep-Eep;23106791]Oops. I may have mistook it for some other kind of engine. 3-5%C... that's probably safe. But you wouldn't want it hitting you none-the-less. Make quite a mess, to say the least. I don't know how far you could see that from, but I know it's a good distance. The saturn 5 was detectable from pluto with our level of tech. 3-5%C... that's pretty fast. Anything capable of reaching that in short time periods is pretty showy.
(Sorry, line of thought.)[/QUOTE]
One time my sister woke me up and for whatever reason I remember I was very angry and said "WHAT DO YOU EXPECT ME TO BECOME" and then immediately after I was like "Wot"
I got drunk with an old guy the other day, he yells in his sleep.
Also last night I was drunk and chilling with a friend of mine, and she was like "have you seen my phone" and I was like "no where did you last see it" and then she was like "something about giraffes", then she threw up in the bushes and threw a piece of bread across the yard. Good night.
While looking at a baseball game:
"Why are they doing that? What are they doing?"
*intense, concentrated stare*
"Can they see me?"
Friend: "What would you do if you got to second base and found out the girl was a tranny?"
Me: "(Shrugging shoulders) Gotta get your dick wet when you gotta get your dick wet."
More "did" than "said" but one time some of my friends got the munchies at like one in the morning while blazed, so they decided to go to the BK drive through but only order and pay for one thing at a time, (so like, one time around, they'd buy a whopper, circle the BK and go back to the drive through and buy a soda, and so on). They wanted to do that for all three of them, but the lady that was working went apeshit and made them order a full meal.
[QUOTE=Tokii;23296437]More "did" than "said" but one time some of my friends got the munchies at like one in the morning while blazed, so they decided to go to the BK drive through but only order and pay for one thing at a time, (so like, one time around, they'd buy a whopper, circle the BK and go back to the drive through and buy a soda, and so on). They wanted to do that for all three of them, but the lady that was working went apeshit and made them order a full meal.[/QUOTE]
I went to Arby's and bought several roast beef sandwiches and the guy shook his head and laughed at me and my friends because he knew we were toked up.
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.