[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28517907][img_thumb]http://asset.soup.io/asset/0426/9090_6404_500.gif[/img_thumb][/QUOTE]
that's pretty old
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28517907][img_thumb]http://asset.soup.io/asset/0426/9090_6404_500.gif[/img_thumb][/QUOTE]
Its cooler when you do it when looking at the text the entire time, then watching the dot. Don't think I'd actually have believed it at first otherwise.
[QUOTE=BenJammin';28516746]Too bad dwarf fortress is the most boring game of all time.[/QUOTE]
Yeh, if you're one of them, minecraft people.
[img]http://static0.blip.pl/user_generated/update_pictures/198204.jpg?1232704996[/img]
Immediately after this
[img]http://achievements.schrankmonster.de/Achievement.aspx?text=1,000,000th%20Stumble[/img]
the things I do for content on LMAO threads.
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[img]http://warehousecomic.com/comic/theWAREHOUSE_comic_616.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28518369][img_thumb]http://warehousecomic.com/comic/theWAREHOUSE_comic_616.jpg[/img_thumb][/QUOTE]
[img]http://www.machall.com/comics/20060922.jpg[/img]
Especially poignant since it was the last installment of the [url=http://www.machall.com/]webcomic[/url].
[img]http://truckbearingkibble.com/images/comic/11-09-07.jpg[/img]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[img]http://imagevat.com/uploads/1172009/2113880723.jpgp[/img]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[img]http://macromeme.com/cat/learning-german.jpg[/img]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
and for your porn magazines
[img]http://www.randompics.net/wp-content/main/2010_08/1281448636412.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Mlisen14;28517434]Oh god, reminds me of:
[url]http://www.break.com/usercontent/2010/2/16/guy-splits-head-in-half-jumping-off-ledge-not-for-feint-hearte-1734366[/url][/QUOTE]
Hah that sucks, wonder if he was nominated for a darwin award.
[img]http://www.franksemails.com/pics/short-story.jpg[/img]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
too bloody long for a screeny. but still content
Fifty Fun Things To Do During A Final That You Know You Are Going To Fail
1. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking" and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early.
2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"
3. If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the integral symbol.
4. Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.
5. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
6. Bring cheerleaders.
7. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"
8. Bring a Game Boy (or Game Gear, etc...). Play with the volume at max level.
9. On the answer sheet (book, whatever) find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
10. Bring pets.
11. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.
12. Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every fifteen minutes.
13. Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.
14. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
15. Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.
16. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
17. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.
18. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.
19. Walk into the exam with an entourage. Claim you are going to be taping your next video during the exam. Try to get the instructor to let them stay, be persuasive. Tell the instructor to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to stay.
20. Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.
21. Turn in the exam approximately 30 minutes into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.
22. Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out interesting things (DCCAB. BABE. etc..).
23. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.
24. Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Fuck this!" and walk out triumphantly.
25. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (i.e. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink)
26. Show up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).
27. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"
28. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.
29. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.
30. Go to an exam for a class you have no clue about, where you know the class is very small, and the instructor would recognize you if you belonged. Claim that you have been to every lecture. Fight for your right to take the exam.
31. Upon receiving the exam, look it over, while laughing loudly, say "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel? Days of our Lives is on!!!"
32. Bring a water pistol with you. Nuff said.
33. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.
34. Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.
35. If the exam is math/science related, make up the longest proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.
36. Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield.
37. Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because you have bad circulation.
38. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."
39. When you walk in, complain about the heat. Strip.
40. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.
41. One word: Wrestlemania.
42. Bring balloons, blow them up, start throwing them around like they do before concerts start.
43. Try to get people in the room to do the wave.
44. Play frisbee with a friend at the other side of the room.
45. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.
46. Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc... sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.
47. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.
48. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.
49. Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If you are asked to stop, say "it helps me think." Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase "Told you so".
50. Answer the exam with the "Top Ten Reasons Why Professor xxxx Sucks"
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[img]http://survivingtheworld.net/Lesson900.jpg[/img]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
again, a long ass list.
1. If you owe someone money, always pay them back in a bar. Preferably during happy hour.
2. Always toast before doing a shot.
3. Whoever buys the shot gets the first chance to offer a toast.
4. Change your toast at least once a month.
Buying-drink5. Buying someone a drink is five times better than a handshake.
6. Buying a strange woman a drink is still cool. Buying all her drinks is dumb.
7. Never borrow more than one cigarette from the same person in one night.
8. When the bartender is slammed, resist the powerful urge to order a slightly-dirty, very-dry, in-and-out, super-chilled half-and-half martini with a lemon twist. Limit orders to beer, straight shots and two-part cocktails.
9. Get the bartender's attention with eye contact and a smile.
10. Do not make eye contact with the bartender if you do not want a drink.
11. Unacceptable things to say after doing a shot: Great, now I’m going to get drunk. I hate shots. It’s coming back up.
12. Never, ever tell a bartender he made your drink too strong.
13. If he makes it too weak, order a double next time. He'll get the message.
14. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she refuses, she does not like you.
15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you.
16. If she buys you a drink, she likes you.
17. If someone offers to buy you a drink, do not upgrade your liquor preference.
18. Always have a corkscrew in your house.
19. If you don't have a corkscrew, push the cork down into the bottle with a pen.
Girly Drink20. Drink one girly drink in public and you will forever be known as the guy who drinks girly drinks.
21. Our parents were better drinkers than we are.
22. Never talk to someone in the restroom unless you're doing the same thing—urinating, waiting in line or washing your hands.
23. Girls hang out, apply make-up, and have long talks in the bathroom. Men do not.
24. After your sixth drink, do not look at yourself in the mirror. It will shake your confidence.
25. It is only permissible to shout 'woo-hoo!' if you are doing a shot with four or more people.
26. If there is a d.j., you can request a song only once per night. If he doesn't play it within half an hour, do not approach him again. If he does play it, do not approach him again.
27. Learn how to make a rose out of a bar napkin. You'll be surprised how well it works.
28. If you can't afford to tip, you can't afford to drink in a bar. Go to the liquor store.
29. If you owe someone twenty dollars or less, you may pay them back in beer.
Ripple30. Never complain about the quality or brand of a free drink.
31. If you have been roommates with someone more than six months, you may drink all their beer, even if it's hidden, as long as you leave them one.
32. You can have a shot of their hard liquor only if the cap has been cracked and the bottle goes for less than $25.
33. The only thing that tastes better than free liquor is stolen liquor.
34. If you bring Old Milwaukee to a party, you must drink at least two cans before you start drinking the imported beer in the fridge.
35. Learn to appreciate hangovers. If it was all good times every jackass would be doing it.
36. If you ever feel depressed, get out a bartender’s guide and browse through all the drinks you’ve never tried.
37. Try one new drink each week.
38. If you are the bar's sole customer, you are obliged to make small talk with the bartender until he stops acknowledging you. Then you're off the hook. The same goes for him.
39. Never tip with coins that have touched you. If your change is $1.50, you can tellthe barmaid to keep the change, but once she has handed it to you, you cannot give it back. To a bartender or cocktail waitress, small change has no value.
40. If you have ever told a bartender, “Hey, it all spends the same,” then you are a cheap ass.
41. Anyone on stage or behind a bar is fifty percent better looking.
42. You can tell how hard a drinker someone is by how close they keep their drink to their mouth.
43. A bar is a college, not a nursery. If you spill a beer, clean it up. If you break a glass, wait for a staff member to clean it up, then blame it on someone else.
44. Being drunk is feeling sophisticated without being able to say it.
Drink Alone45. It's okay to drink alone.
46. After three drinks, you will forget a woman's name two seconds after she tells you. The rest of the night you will call her “baby” or “darling”.
47. Nothing screams 'nancy boy' louder than swirling an oversized brandy snifter.
48. Men don't drink from straws. Unless you're doing a Mind or Face Eraser.
49. If you do a shot, finish it. If you don't plan to finish it, don't accept it.
50. Never brood in a dance bar. Never dance in a dive bar.
51. Never play more than three songs by the same artist in a row.
52. Your songs will come on as you're leaving the bar.
53. Never yell out jukebox selections to someone you don't know.
54. Never lie in a bar. You may, however, grossly exaggerate and lean.
Slurring55. If you think you might be slurring a little, then you are slurring a lot. If you think you are slurring a lot, then you are not speaking English.
56. Screaming, “Someone buy me a drink!” has never worked.
57. For every drink, there is a five percent better chance you will get in a fight. There is also a three percent better chance you will lose the fight.
58. Fighting an extremely drunk person when you are sober is hilarious.
59. If you are broke and a friend is “sporting you”, you must laugh at all his jokes and play wingman when he makes his move.
60. If you are broke and a friend is “making sport of you”, you may steal any drink he leaves unattended.
61. Never rest your head on a table or bar top. It is the equivalent of voluntarily putting your head on a chopping block.
62. If you are trading rounds with a friend and he asks if you're ready for another, always say yes. Once you fall out of sync you will end up buying more drinks than him.
63. If you're going to hit on a member of the bar staff, make sure you tip well before and after, regardless of her response.
Tipping64. The people with the most money are rarely the best tippers.
65. Before you die, single-handedly make one decent martini.
66. Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, “I'm an idiot.”
67. Never ask a bartender “what's good tonight?” They do not fly in the scotch fresh from the coast every morning.
68. If there is a line for drinks, get your goddamn drink and step the hell away from the bar.
69. If there is ever any confusion, the fuller beer is yours.
70. The patrons at your local bar are your extended family, your fathers and mothers, your brothers and sisters. Except you get to sleep with these sisters. And if you're really drunk, the mothers.
71. It's acceptable, traditional in fact, to disappear during a night of hard drinking. You will appear mysterious and your friends will understand. If they even notice.
72. Never argue your tab at the end of the night. Remember, you're hammered and they’re sober. It's akin to a precocious five-year-old arguing the super-string theory with a physicist. 99.9% of the time you're wrong and either way you're going to come off as a jackass.
Drink it or leave it73. If you bring booze to a party, you must drink it or leave it.
74. If you hesitate more than three seconds after the bartender looks at you, you do not deserve a drink.
75. Beer makes you mellow, champagne makes you silly, wine makes you dramatic, tequila makes you felonious.
76. The greatest thing a drunkard can do is buy a round of drinks for a packed bar.
77. Never preface a conversation with a bartender with “I know this is going to be a hassle, but . . .”
78. When you’re in a bar and drunk, your boss is just another guy begging for a fat lip. Unless he’s buying.
79. If you are 86’d, do not return for at least three months. To come back sooner makes it appear no other bar wants you.
80. Anyone with three or more drinks in his hands has the right of way.
81. If you’re going to drink on the job, drink vodka. It’s the no-tell liquor.
82. There’s nothing wrong with drinking before noon. Especially if you’re supposed to be at work.
83. The bar clock moves twice as fast from midnight to last call.
84. A flask engraved with a personal message is one of the best gifts you can ever give. And make sure there’s something in it.
85. On the intimacy scale, sharing a quiet drink is between a handshake and a kiss.
86. You will forget every one of these rules by your fifth drink.
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[img]http://www.darkfantasy.org/fantasy/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/steampunkgadgets01.jpg[/img] for bioshock fans.
Some content in this motherfucker
[img]http://img580.imageshack.us/img580/9789/spijkers.jpg[/img]
Japan, Ur so crazy...
[img]http://img87.imageshack.us/img87/2391/gekkeosso.jpg[/img]
[img]http://img220.imageshack.us/img220/4599/omatjuh.jpg[/img]
[img]http://img854.imageshack.us/img854/917/tailand.jpg[/img]
[img]http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/6141/jajaar.jpg[/img]
[img]http://img852.imageshack.us/img852/9937/autobeuro.jpg[/img]
[img]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/84a444f5_acid_picdump_02.jpg[/img]
[img]http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/funny-picture-and-explanation-of-why-I-want-to-be-a-bear-in-my-next-life.jpg[/img]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Moh Tommie;28518934][img_thumb]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/11bd0cf6_tumblr_lglg7mz3Hv1qbbb1vo1_500.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/e62e5e41_acid_picdump_51.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/5c8b2e42_tumblr_lgj73uaIt71qzpsuoo1_500.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/99fe19b0_bIJgj.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/c220446e_acid_picdump_51.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/7f63e30f_acid_picdump_46.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/foto/84a444f5_acid_picdump_02.jpg[/img_thumb][/QUOTE]
I see nothing.
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28518706]
[img_thumb]http://www.darkfantasy.org/fantasy/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/steampunkgadgets01.jpg[/img_thumb] for bioshock fans.[/QUOTE]
I believe that violin belongs to the violinist in the band Abney Park. Great band.
[img]http://socialmediarage.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/RedditRed.jpg[/img]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[img]http://www.starwarfigure.com/storm-trooper.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=gman003-main;28518448][img_thumb]http://www.machall.com/comics/20060922.jpg[/img_thumb]
Especially poignant since it was the last installment of the [url=http://www.machall.com/]webcomic[/url].[/QUOTE]
Fuck yes! Disgaea!
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28519055][img_thumb]http://socialmediarage.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/RedditRed.jpg[/img_thumb]
[editline]9th March 2011[/editline]
[img_thumb]http://www.starwarfigure.com/storm-trooper.jpg[/img_thumb][/QUOTE]
I have a scapegoat. My friend sends me porn all the time in hidden links.
[img]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-1.jpg[/img]
[img]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-2.jpg[/img]
Mountain, or crater?
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28519167][img_thumb]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-1.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-2.jpg[/img_thumb]
Mountain, or crater?[/QUOTE]
I searched it, its a meteor crater.
You guys know the deal.
1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.
3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
1 4. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is a muffin in each hand.
17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
19. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides nice contrast to the real world.
25. It ain’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.
26. If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved it’s full potential, that word would be ‘meetings’.
27. There is a very fine line between ‘hobby’ and ‘mental illness.’
28. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
29. You should not confuse your career with your life.
30. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.
31. Never lick a steak knife.
32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
33. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
34. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
35. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that deep down inside we ALL believe we are good drivers.
36. Your friends love you anyway.
[img]http://nerfnow.com/comic/image/481[/img]
[QUOTE=DinoJesus;28519203]I searched it, its a meteor crater.[/QUOTE]
In arizona :eng101:
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28519167][img_thumb]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-1.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-2.jpg[/img_thumb]
Mountain, or crater?[/QUOTE]
Crater; the bluish hint of sky would be at the top of the image, not the bottom.
Boxdog, does your grandma email you this sort of stuff all the time?
[QUOTE=Jack_Thompson;28519302]Boxdog, does your grandma email you this sort of stuff all the time?[/QUOTE]
No, one is near death.
and I doubt my other grandmother would even "get" most of these jokes.
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28519167][img_thumb]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-1.jpg[/img_thumb]
[img_thumb]http://www.futilitycloset.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007-09-19-switcheroo-2.jpg[/img_thumb]
Mountain, or crater?[/QUOTE]
Crate but stop playing tricks on my brain.
[QUOTE=Moh Tommie;28518934]Some content in this motherfucker
[img_thumb]http://img580.imageshack.us/img580/9789/spijkers.jpg[/img_thumb]
[/QUOTE]
I guess you could say he...
[b]*Puts on Sunglasses*[/b]
...nailed it.
[b]YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH[/b]
For nostalgia.
[img]http://pete.com/files/photos/6ae39c320b1f1b0e23562530d6fd1561.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Abrown516;28519245]Crater; the bluish hint of sky would be at the top of the image, not the bottom.[/QUOTE]
Or the fact that if it was a mountain, it sure as hell looked very unnatural.
Last one for tonight. School in the morning.
[img]http://pics.blameitonthevoices.com/022010/small_the%20fibonacci%20spiral.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=The BoxDog;28515298][img_thumb]http://www.sciencebase.com/images/seven-deadly-sins.jpg[/img_thumb][/QUOTE]
[img]http://unrealitymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/seven.jpg[/img]
"Innocent? Is that supposed to be funny? An obese man... a disgusting man who could barely stand up; a man who if you saw him on the street, you'd point him out to your friends so that they could join you in mocking him; a man, who if you saw him while you were eating, you wouldn't be able to finish your meal. After him, I picked the lawyer and I know you both must have been secretly thanking me for that one. This is a man who dedicated his life to making money by lying with every breath that he could muster to keeping murderers and rapists on the streets!
A woman... so ugly on the inside she couldn't bear to go on living if she couldn't be beautiful on the outside. A drug dealer, a drug dealing pederast, actually! And let's not forget the disease-spreading whore! Only in a world this shitty could you even try to say these were innocent people and keep a straight face. But that's the point. We see a deadly sin on every street corner, in every home, and we tolerate it. We tolerate it because it's common, it's trivial. We tolerate it morning, noon, and night. Well, not anymore. I'm setting the example. What I've done is going to be puzzled over and studied and followed... forever."
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