Weird Kids At Your School v2 dude wtf are you masturbating in band class
3,054 replies, posted
What time in 8th grade I was done showering in the locker rooms, and I'm usually the jokester of my school so I thought I would get my friends in my the locker row good with a some gay ass locker antics.
So I came waddling down the locker rows with my towel on, get to the corner entrance to my locker row, and yell, "How's it hanging!?" As I jumped around the corner and dropped my towel with my hands outstretched like a true showman. Hips forward and junk standing out for the row to see.
Not only did my friends see, but one of my coaches saw, who had been talking to one of the kids in my row.
Luckily, I didn't get in trouble, but I probably have to die on the inside once everyday thinking about it.
[QUOTE=Nightscout;47142279]Dude, honestly, black people are awesome.
For some reason, their charisma is just unparalleled, they can do the most spontaneous and out-of-nowhere things that would make no sense otherwise, and they still look awesome and hilarious.[/QUOTE]
I can vouch for this, my best friend is black. Everytime we are around him theres always laughs
In my latest CEGEP years, there was this guy who had Asperger or something, at least he liked to use that to justify his fuckedupness. He was the kind that [b][i]LOVES[/i][/b] to barge in other people's conversations to spew uninteresting or outright "too much detail" shit.
Like one time, I was talking to my buddies about, I don't know, the latest video game that came out I guess, when assburger dude comes and goes "Hey I put my underwear on the drying rope and..." We were all like what the fuck do you want?
He also had some kind of sexual orientation problem. Like one day he was straight, the other one he was gay with a boyfriend. But the worst....well first of all, since he had Asperger or something, he had like no inhibition. So the worst is that he never hesitated to talk about his STDs, which were fucking disgusting. Judging from what he said, the guy was a walking T-Virus. It was dreadful to be in his presence after he told about his many sexual adventures with his....partners and his STDs.
Also, NEVER MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH HIM. He will then procede to move towards you then force a conversation with you.
I was glad as fuck to graduate and never see him again.
[QUOTE=DEMONSKUL;47150956]In my latest CEGEP years, there was this guy who had Asperger or something, at least he liked to use that to justify his fuckedupness. He was the kind that [b][i]LOVES[/i][/b] to barge in other people's conversations to spew uninteresting or outright "too much detail" shit.
Like one time, I was talking to my buddies about, I don't know, the latest video game that came out I guess, when assburger dude comes and goes "Hey I put my underwear on the drying rope and..." We were all like what the fuck do you want?
He also had some kind of sexual orientation problem. Like one day he was straight, the other one he was gay with a boyfriend. But the worst....well first of all, since he had Asperger or something, he had like no inhibition. So the worst is that he never hesitated to talk about his STDs, which were fucking disgusting. Judging from what he said, the guy was a walking T-Virus. It was dreadful to be in his presence after he told about his many sexual adventures with his....partners and his STDs.
Also, NEVER MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH HIM. He will then procede to move towards you then force a conversation with you.
I was glad as fuck to graduate and never see him again.[/QUOTE]
Until he becomes your boss.
Then you'll [I]have to[/I] converse with him.
[QUOTE=Talvy;47134244]I never understood arguments about music genres.
Like, who cares, just listen to the music.[/QUOTE]
Its a pain to enjoy metal/the occasional rap/R&B song because every fucking youtube page is filled with "I'M 13 BUT THIS ISU REAL MUSIC I HATE MY GENERATIOn!!!!" or "WOW THIS ISN'T REAL (x genre) FUCKING SHITTT!!!"
[QUOTE=Dermock;47159289]Its a pain to enjoy metal/the occasional rap/R&B song because every fucking youtube page is filled with "I'M 13 BUT THIS ISU REAL MUSIC I HATE MY GENERATIOn!!!!" or "WOW THIS ISN'T REAL (x genre) FUCKING SHITTT!!!"[/QUOTE]
that's why i listen to music with their songs on youtube having 10k views at most
hue
i AM an alexander and all the alexanders i know are dickheads, not awful on the level of this thread, but bad enough to be notable
im sorry
[QUOTE=FlashMarsh;47159846]i AM an alexander and all the alexanders i know are dickheads, not awful on the level of this thread, but bad enough to be notable
im sorry[/QUOTE]
go jerk off in the library alexander
[QUOTE=Dermock;47163971]go jerk off in the library alexander[/QUOTE]
really man
[QUOTE=sourcegamer101;47164735]really man[/QUOTE]
since it apparently wasn't obvious, that was a joke, since there seems to be hundreds of alexanders that jerk off in libraries
There was this nice but awkward girl in my high school band who would constantly come to school in extremely elaborate anime-ish costumes. It's hard to describe them but they looked like something you'd see at a convention (Some had wings). It was honestly kind of impressive since it was stuff she made herself, and she had a lot of them.
[QUOTE=An Armed Bear;47165094]There was this nice but awkward girl in my high school band who would constantly come to school in extremely elaborate anime-ish costumes. It's hard to describe them but they looked like something you'd see at a convention (Some had wings). It was honestly kind of impressive since it was stuff she made herself, and she had a lot of them.[/QUOTE]
You know, it's weird here, but talk a walk in Japan and that would be seen as normal.
[QUOTE=DEMONSKUL;47165104]You know, it's weird here, but talk a walk in Japan and that would be seen as normal.[/QUOTE]
no it wouldnt, from what i've heard japan has even higher expectations of people dressing and looking normal around the place
[QUOTE=FlashMarsh;47165286]no it wouldnt, from what i've heard japan has even higher expectations of people dressing and looking normal around the place[/QUOTE]
Ssssh, dont let the weebs know, theyd be heartbroken
I had an Alexander in my class back in 5th grade I think. He told me his mother would whip him if he didnt get a 10/10 for all of his tests. He once said his grandmother died, so our teacher offered his condolences to his mom, and his mother had no idea what Alexander was talking about
I knew an Alex in elementary school. Normal chap. Rich parents. Untill he got an 8/10 for a Geography test (still in elemantary school so grades didn't matter that much). Then he kicked a brick wall so hard he broke his foot.
[QUOTE=DEMONSKUL;47150956]In my latest CEGEP years, there was this guy who had Asperger or something, at least he liked to use that to justify his fuckedupness. He was the kind that [b][i]LOVES[/i][/b] to barge in other people's conversations to spew uninteresting or outright "too much detail" shit.
Like one time, I was talking to my buddies about, I don't know, the latest video game that came out I guess, when assburger dude comes and goes "Hey I put my underwear on the drying rope and..." We were all like what the fuck do you want?
He also had some kind of sexual orientation problem. Like one day he was straight, the other one he was gay with a boyfriend. But the worst....well first of all, since he had Asperger or something, he had like no inhibition. So the worst is that he never hesitated to talk about his STDs, which were fucking disgusting. Judging from what he said, the guy was a walking T-Virus. It was dreadful to be in his presence after he told about his many sexual adventures with his....partners and his STDs.
Also, NEVER MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH HIM. He will then procede to move towards you then force a conversation with you.
I was glad as fuck to graduate and never see him again.[/QUOTE]
I feel more sympathy for him.
[QUOTE=Demeschik;47081719]Alexander. Alexander. Alexander. Alexander. alexander alexander alexander alExandEr[/QUOTE]
I come bearing news today. Recently Alex the Wanker has come back, and Alex the Writer is still alive and kicking. This is the story of a cross-over event.
Alex the Wanker is very politically-conscious. Every chance he gets, he shoots out insane comments on modern day politics. During a Sociology lesson, we had a talk on lawmaking and citizenships, the teacher mentioned Girard Depardieu getting a Russian citizenship in an unusual manner specifically. Alex couldn't handle the injustice, so he raised his hand and spoke out in an agitated manner. This is what he said, and I'm going to try my best to translate it into English. "So does this mean that the president can just fuck the law like a cat? That's totalitarism." "Fuck the law like a cat" as in "a cat getting fucked", he wasn't talking about the barbed dicks or anything. Anyway, the teacher asked him to repeat what he had said, and he did it without even a flinch in his voice. Nothing came out of that.
A couple of days later, another thing happened during a History class with the same teacher. We were watching a WW2 documentary, and she mentioned that the Germans were "fascist" in a sentence or some shit like that. Alex went mad. He raised his hand once more and started going on a tangent about how nazism is different from fascism, I have no idea what the fuck he was thinking. The teacher shut down the discussion.
Same day, we somehow ended up discussing his page with him. He said that being a woman in the army "takes guts", an idiom that doesn't translate into Russian at all, so he just translated it word-for-word. Nobody caught it. He said that he admires collarbones, but also fancies himself some nipple photos. He admitted that he'd "rather look at forty year-old women than lolis", because "Life only begins when you're forty." (exact quote). Nobody knew what lolis are, except for maybe me and a couple of other nerdy guys. Looking at other people, I could tell that they were increasingly uncomfortable. He offered them his tablet, saying that they wouldn't find anything "vulgar" or dirty on it. All they had to do was switch from one photo folder to another, but he said that it was "different" because it was fantasy art or some shit like that.
So anyway, back to the crossover thing. During the discussion the dude was afraid to admit to even visiting the page we had found. He said that he had last visited it "a couple of months ago", even though all the dates on the profile, from the last date on a profile pic to the last login date, say otherwise. Alex the Writer felt sympathetic for him, mainly because he got fucked over by the same network once, so during our discussion he had tried really hard to force himself into the discussion, almost screaming "MAYBE YOU FOUND THE WRONG PAGE!" to us from a couple of tables away.
Same day, during a Physics lesson infrared communication or some other shit that I do not understand gets mentioned. The teacher says that it is used for communicating with space objects. Alex the Wanker raises his hand... For some unknown reason, he decides to tell us that a base on the Moon would be unprofitable, because it's a "barren wasteland", because we "already know everything about it, even about it's metallic core" and because "there is nothing on it". At this point everyone is eager to join in, a couple of people speak their mind or tell him to shut the fuck up. The teacher asks him if he'd prefer space bases, but he doesn't respond. She asks him if he things something else would be "more profitable", he complete silence. I decide to fuck with him. I turn to him and make up some shit about orbital drops, about how you don't have to land space ships on the moon to deliver resources, I don't even know, man. The beast within him is back, he, again, mentions that there is nothing on the Moon (I looked it up afterwards, there are aluminum, ferrum, carbon and isotope helium-3 which is incredibly rare on Earth, so he's totally wrong), how gravitation would prevent us from sending anything (even though we had landed Curiosity somehow). Then he gets up, starts singing a Game of Thrones song in English to himself, shows the teacher his phone and leaves. We had a second history lesson that day.
Anyway, this guy is fucking nuts, probably even more than Alex the Writer. I heard he's going to appeal for homeschooling.
I knew this Mexican-American chubster named Jordan back in elementary school. He was a nuisance to my brother and I because he'd try to be our friend when in reality he was just annoying.
One time he told me a story about how he locked himself in his bathroom with the lights off and tried summoning Bloody Mary, but instead he got Satan somehow and he looked really demented in the mirror. I may have warped some facts there, but I was young and gullible enough to believe him at the time.
As for my brother, the touchscreen on his Nintendo DS was dirty so Jordan tried to help him clean it. With a liquid meant for non-touchscreen devices. Said touchscreen refused to work for many years afterwards before we found a way to clean it properly.
There's this freshman in one of my P.E. classes who climbs on the bleachers constantly, I think at times he does it because of all the red signs that say "DO NOT CLIMB ON THE BLEACHERS" When he is near other freshmen he starts hissing and nearly tackles people (Motherfucker nearly tackled someone down the stairs one time) The weirdest thing i've seen him do is bang his head on the door to the fitness room (Where we use the weight machines) when it's locked and the teacher is coming to unlock it, but in the middle of him banging his head he turns around, tries to tackle another kid, the kid stepped out of the way, and dude tackled into a brick wall, he got right back up and continued to bang his head on the door.
[QUOTE=Tall Russian;47168740]There's this freshman in one of my P.E. classes who climbs on the bleachers constantly, I think at times he does it because of all the red signs that say "DO NOT CLIMB ON THE BLEACHERS" When he is near other freshmen he starts hissing and nearly tackles people (Motherfucker nearly tackled someone down the stairs one time) The weirdest thing i've seen him do is bang his head on the door to the fitness room (Where we use the weight machines) when it's locked and the teacher is coming to unlock it, but in the middle of him banging his head he turns around, tries to tackle another kid, the kid stepped out of the way, and dude tackled into a brick wall, he got right back up and continued to bang his head on the door.[/QUOTE]
What the actual fuck?
[QUOTE=Demeschik;47167710]I come bearing news today. Recently Alex the Wanker has come back, and Alex the Writer is still alive and kicking. This is the story of a cross-over event.
Alex the Wanker is very politically-conscious. Every chance he gets, he shoots out insane comments on modern day politics. During a Sociology lesson, we had a talk on lawmaking and citizenships, the teacher mentioned Girard Depardieu getting a Russian citizenship in an unusual manner specifically. Alex couldn't handle the injustice, so he raised his hand and spoke out in an agitated manner. This is what he said, and I'm going to try my best to translate it into English. "So does this mean that the president can just fuck the law like a cat? That's totalitarism." "Fuck the law like a cat" as in "a cat getting fucked", he wasn't talking about the barbed dicks or anything. Anyway, the teacher asked him to repeat what he had said, and he did it without even a flinch in his voice. Nothing came out of that.
A couple of days later, another thing happened during a History class with the same teacher. We were watching a WW2 documentary, and she mentioned that the Germans were "fascist" in a sentence or some shit like that. Alex went mad. He raised his hand once more and started going on a tangent about how nazism is different from fascism, I have no idea what the fuck he was thinking. The teacher shut down the discussion.
Same day, we somehow ended up discussing his page with him. He said that being a woman in the army "takes guts", an idiom that doesn't translate into Russian at all, so he just translated it word-for-word. Nobody caught it. He said that he admires collarbones, but also fancies himself some nipple photos. He admitted that he'd "rather look at forty year-old women than lolis", because "Life only begins when you're forty." (exact quote). Nobody knew what lolis are, except for maybe me and a couple of other nerdy guys. Looking at other people, I could tell that they were increasingly uncomfortable. He offered them his tablet, saying that they wouldn't find anything "vulgar" or dirty on it. All they had to do was switch from one photo folder to another, but he said that it was "different" because it was fantasy art or some shit like that.
So anyway, back to the crossover thing. During the discussion the dude was afraid to admit to even visiting the page we had found. He said that he had last visited it "a couple of months ago", even though all the dates on the profile, from the last date on a profile pic to the last login date, say otherwise. Alex the Writer felt sympathetic for him, mainly because he got fucked over by the same network once, so during our discussion he had tried really hard to force himself into the discussion, almost screaming "MAYBE YOU FOUND THE WRONG PAGE!" to us from a couple of tables away.
Same day, during a Physics lesson infrared communication or some other shit that I do not understand gets mentioned. The teacher says that it is used for communicating with space objects. Alex the Wanker raises his hand... For some unknown reason, he decides to tell us that a base on the Moon would be unprofitable, because it's a "barren wasteland", because we "already know everything about it, even about it's metallic core" and because "there is nothing on it". At this point everyone is eager to join in, a couple of people speak their mind or tell him to shut the fuck up. The teacher asks him if he'd prefer space bases, but he doesn't respond. She asks him if he things something else would be "more profitable", he complete silence. I decide to fuck with him. I turn to him and make up some shit about orbital drops, about how you don't have to land space ships on the moon to deliver resources, I don't even know, man. The beast within him is back, he, again, mentions that there is nothing on the Moon (I looked it up afterwards, there are aluminum, ferrum, carbon and isotope helium-3 which is incredibly rare on Earth, so he's totally wrong), how gravitation would prevent us from sending anything (even though we had landed Curiosity somehow). Then he gets up, starts singing a Game of Thrones song in English to himself, shows the teacher his phone and leaves. We had a second history lesson that day.
Anyway, this guy is fucking nuts, probably even more than Alex the Writer. I heard he's going to appeal for homeschooling.[/QUOTE]
To be fair to Alex the Wanker, many historians would argue that Nazi Germany wasn't truly fascist. But its just semantics to be honest and not really a useful topic of debate.
You know how people totally hold their shits in until the coast is clear, so as to not upset a certain stranger they'll never cross paths with again who literally can't even see you in the first place? Well I was doing that today in a library stall, waiting on some dude at the urinal. Kept waiting, no pissing sounds. Eventually I realized he was slapping dick. So there I was, a shit pounding on the door of my asshole with some guy four feet to my left jacking off into the urinal. The ultimate standoff. Luckily, he didn't last too long.
[QUOTE=danjee;47175138]You know how people totally hold their shits in until the coast is clear, so as to not upset a certain stranger they'll never cross paths with again who literally can't even see you in the first place? Well I was doing that today in a library stall, waiting on some dude at the urinal. Kept waiting, no pissing sounds. Eventually I realized he was slapping dick. So there I was, a shit pounding on the door of my asshole with some guy four feet to my left jacking off into the urinal. The ultimate standoff. Luckily, he didn't last too long.[/QUOTE]
You should have just dropped the loudest shit on the planet & ruined his nasty bathroom wank.
[QUOTE=danjee;47175138]You know how people totally hold their shits in until the coast is clear, so as to not upset a certain stranger they'll never cross paths with again who literally can't even see you in the first place?[/QUOTE]
I never understood why people do that. I prefer to sit down, blast it out and get it over with ASAP. The toilets are there for a reason, and its not like anyone is going to be annoyed at you about it.
[QUOTE=MilkBagz;47175177]You should have just dropped the loudest shit on the planet & ruined his nasty bathroom wank.[/QUOTE]
but what if he started going harder
[QUOTE=samuel2213;47175189]I never understood why people do that. I prefer to sit down, blast it out and get it over with ASAP. The toilets are there for a reason, and its not like anyone is going to be annoyed at you about it.[/QUOTE]
brain says do it, anus says wait
theres a kid named alex who is basically a weaboo for germany. he knows about 35 words of german and says that he is "fluent" in it. when i wore my ushanka to school once he got really pissed off about it.
[editline]20th February 2015[/editline]
oh and he wears a fedora with an iron cross on it
wtf
M'fräulein
M'Führer
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