• Weird Kids At Your School v2 dude wtf are you masturbating in band class
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Like i said before, this has got to be the best thread so far in a long time.
[QUOTE=Nightscout;47335613]In one of my literature classes, the teacher showed [I] The Boy in the Striped Pajamas[/I]. After the screen faded to black, one kid thought that the Nazis had turned all the Jews into clothes.[/QUOTE] I always knew Hitler worked under Houdini!
So, today i had a exam, as the our school requires us to read about 8 books, make a report on them and tell our teachers about them. Please note that i am Dutch, and the class i was doing the exam for was Dutch, so we get started, and two persons come waltzing into the office, and they start to ask questions to the teacher... and they ask what we are doing here. He looks them straight in the eyes and says: "They're here to do their Dutch Exam, they're doing it in German." To which one of them gives the most idiotic response possible: "Really?" "Really." "Jeez, am i glad i'm one level lower than them!" Me and the guy sitting there taking the exam are just looking at eachother, and these guys were fucking serious. tl;dr: The people on my school are stupid.
I swear to God my class has no idea of history... It was like a few months ago during history class. We were about ready to study about the beginning of WW2 and all that stuff. While the teacher got finished explaining the day's lesson, one girl raised her hand and asked "Did we lose WW2?" I swear i wanted to slam my head on the desk.
[QUOTE=ImperialGuard;47079944]First day of school last year the teacher was doing roll and then he goes "Dmitri? No Dmitri? Alright, absent I guess." We didn't know any Dmitris so we thought it was odd. Ten minutes into the class, this huge fat kid walks in and looks around before going "I AM DMITRI, I SIT THERE," before pointing at a seat next to me and plopping down. We never saw him after that day.[/QUOTE] Reminds me of a similar guy I had in class. Polish kid by the name of Kwoka, couldn't understand or speak Norwegian for shit. His English was almost as bad. He would sit there and do nothing, and when the teacher asked if he understood her, he just nodded and said yes. Even to questions where yes and no wouldn't be enough. He taught us the words for dick, pussy, and fuck in Polish, and showed us something he called "Polish Facebook" with loads of naked girls. We had him for a week or something until he stopped showing up.
[QUOTE=Deathtrooper2;47342014]I swear to God my class has no idea of history... It was like a few months ago during history class. We were about ready to study about the beginning of WW2 and all that stuff. While the teacher got finished explaining the day's lesson, one girl raised her hand and asked "Did we lose WW2?" I swear i wanted to slam my head on the desk.[/QUOTE]well, did we?
Today as I was walking upstairs in school there was this short, pudgy Italian looking kid, who had no shirt on and only an Adidas wind breaker and sweats as he leaned against the wall and sipped an unmarked 2 liter bottle of soda.
I got sat next to the socially reclusive loner-girl in History class in one year who I was convinced had a mild obsession with me, maybe just because I wasn't an asshole, got on with the work and found the work piss easy At first I noticed she'd play with her hair constantly, which I passed off as just weird, much like her incredibly awkward technique of dealing with the cold, to which she shuddered, shook herself and rubbed her hands against her knees really vigorously Bearing in mind we were taught in classrooms where everyone sat at a massive table or a bunch of tables, On one occasion in class she kept leaning over to the side at the edge of the table to her bag and spraying herself with perfume or something. She only had this habit once but she kept doing this nervously and I distinctly remember my nose itched pretty bad by the end of that lesson. On one trip, when given hours free reign to walk around, she walked around by herself, and then tailed the group we were in like a dog, leaving and doing this again and again. Sometimes I wonder if she just found excuses to say mundane shit instead of being silent because I remember her asking the teacher what the "Henrician Reformation" was, exaggerated curious undertone and all Even though we had been doing Henry VIII and the Tudors for the past few months, and the religious aspects of the period over the last term. Tl;dr I did not find her attractive but I didn't complain -Also one of my best friends for 5 years was a guy who slept at 3am in the morning every night, powered himself with caffeine drinks and coffee, had violent mood swings and eventually hit me with a deodorant can just above my eye because of something I said -Another one of my childhood friends got mad at me for throwing an improvised water-bottle football in the bin and pulled my arm until he wrenched it and put it in a sling for a few weeks -I knew a guy who sat at lunch every day with a laptop and played vidya with 1-2 watchers for most of the year
One girl in our class mixed up Calvin (the Christianity guy) and Colijn (our primeminister in WW1) once. So the teacher was explaining that Colijn fucked up our economy and then she raises her hand and asks ''Was this before or after he stapled those things on the church door??''
At uni, we were discussing infographics and we had to do some group work with the people next to us. An enlightened fellow, sporting a fedora, looks like he is in his late twenties or early thirties, was my partner. This lesson was very uncomfortable, as this guy had no clue what he was talking about whatsoever. First he asked the tutor if music is an infographic. She said no. He tried to explain to her that it was. She still said no. Then he was trying to tell me that Eminem aka Slim Shady was an infographic and then tried to explain this to the tutor. She kept telling him no and he started going on about subliminal messaging. The tutor told him that she agrees that subliminal messaging exists but it has nothing to do with the infographics. I'm going to avoid this guy like the plague from now on. There's no way I'm letting him sit near me tomorrow.
[QUOTE=bradleigh;47344189]well, did we?[/QUOTE] In a way we all lost in WW2
[QUOTE=Darth Ninja;47346840]At uni, we were discussing infographics and we had to do some group work with the people next to us. An enlightened fellow, sporting a fedora, looks like he is in his late twenties or early thirties, was my partner. This lesson was very uncomfortable, as this guy had no clue what he was talking about whatsoever. First he asked the tutor if music is an infographic. She said no. He tried to explain to her that it was. She still said no. Then he was trying to tell me that Eminem aka Slim Shady was an infographic and then tried to explain this to the tutor. She kept telling him no and he started going on about subliminal messaging. The tutor told him that she agrees that subliminal messaging exists but it has nothing to do with the infographics. I'm going to avoid this guy like the plague from now on. There's no way I'm letting him sit near me tomorrow.[/QUOTE] "Is the thing THE thing?" "No" "But I'm right!" "no" "But I am" "No" How to not get a clue
A girl asked me today how to convert inches to feet. All she was doing was looking back at me chewing her gum as if it were one of life's existential myths. Please note, this girl was a highschool student. What in the fresh hell
There's this girl on my class that's the textbook definition of an airhead, granted I don't study in the most prestigious uni(it's basically an arts and design school), there's still an entrance exam and I have no idea how she got past that. The other day during one of our geometry classes she asked the teacher "do the rulers start at 0 or 1?" while holding a ruler that clearly had a "0" labeled on it.
[QUOTE=Fosax;47348439]"do the rulers start at 0 or 1?" while holding a ruler that clearly had a "0" labeled on it.[/QUOTE] She's in the right place, it was clearly a philosophical question. Yes, the ruler might be labeled that way, [I]but does it truly start at zero?[/I]
[QUOTE=Darth Ninja;47346840]At uni, we were discussing infographics and we had to do some group work with the people next to us. An enlightened fellow, sporting a fedora, looks like he is in his late twenties or early thirties, was my partner. This lesson was very uncomfortable, as this guy had no clue what he was talking about whatsoever. First he asked the tutor if music is an infographic. She said no. He tried to explain to her that it was. She still said no. Then he was trying to tell me that Eminem aka Slim Shady was an infographic and then tried to explain this to the tutor. She kept telling him no and he started going on about subliminal messaging. The tutor told him that she agrees that subliminal messaging exists but it has nothing to do with the infographics. I'm going to avoid this guy like the plague from now on. There's no way I'm letting him sit near me tomorrow.[/QUOTE] "Is Mayonaise an instrument?"
speaking of body odors, this one kid in school who was allergic to deodorant, or at least that was what he said to explain the awful smell. we told him about using perfume as an alternative on his uniform, to wich he replied that he had tried but never found an aroma he really liked. it didn't help matrix was the hottest thing in the world at the time and wearing a super long leather coat was the true definition of cool.
There is this kid in my Art class that when I first met him, he seemed alright, but then he came out of no where with a shit ton of questions about my class schedule and what time I go to bed (etc.). That isn't something you ask a person you first meet them. Now he keeps trying to talk to me even though I BLATANTLY ignore him and shun him away from me. He also has this weird tendency to just stare at some people... this cold, lifeless, hateful stare he uses as if he is trying to send some sort of threating message. Sends chills down my spine every time he does it to me.
There's one person at my school who's known to make "relieved" noises when they poop, like they [I]really[/I] enjoy pooping.
[QUOTE=riekelt;47341946]So, today i had a exam, as the our school requires us to read about 8 books, make a report on them and tell our teachers about them. Please note that i am Dutch, and the class i was doing the exam for was Dutch, so we get started, and two persons come waltzing into the office, and they start to ask questions to the teacher... and they ask what we are doing here. He looks them straight in the eyes and says: "They're here to do their Dutch Exam, they're doing it in German." To which one of them gives the most idiotic response possible: "Really?" "Really." "Jeez, am i glad i'm one level lower than them!" Me and the guy sitting there taking the exam are just looking at eachother, and these guys were fucking serious. tl;dr: The people on my school are stupid.[/QUOTE] Ah, reminds me of my Dutch oral exam in high school. Was supposed to have read about 7-8 books. Somehow managed to get by without reading even one of them.
I think that almost everyone did ^
[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;47411483]I think that almost everyone did ^[/QUOTE] My Dutch teacher once had someone who said he would read The Discovery of Heaven for his oral exam. He did.
[QUOTE=Sir Whoopsalot;47411086]Ah, reminds me of my Dutch oral exam in high school. Was supposed to have read about 7-8 books. Somehow managed to get by without reading even one of them.[/QUOTE] I read plot summaries for most of my books and used audio books for the other books.
I live in a small town full of old people, which apparently causes such a concentration of weird kids that it's hard to remember anything in particular. I do remember this one principal I had in the last year of grade school (grades 1-8 for you 'muricans, I think part of that is middle school for you). Everyone hated her, including the staff (my school was nice because most of the students and all the staff, from janitors to teachers, were pretty close and each group generally knew what was going on with the other), largely because she blatantly could not care less about us kidfolks. The main thing I remember about her was that she'd hiss like a goddamned snake, and called us "friendsssss" all the time, like some kind of she-Voldemort. After my last year there, she got carted off to another school, then a year or so later I guess it turned out she'd been embezzling the school board and was fired. No one was surprised. Also in high school, I was in an American History class that only had like 7 people in it because everyone here hates history. It was a goddamned amazing class because those seven people included two quiet snarky people (me and this Asian girl), one slightly dumb guy who I really hopes looks into becoming a comedian, and a couple of guys who love politics who were kinda organized into two groups; one group was led by this big guy who I always remember wearing a blue sweater, and the other a ridiculously tall, skinny, and pale guy who was mistaken for an adult breaking into the school at least once, frequently wore a poncho, and lived for a.) messing with our teacher, and b.) the GLORY OF MOTHER RUSSIA Most classes began with him either writing something silly on the chalkboard, trying to hide behind the door when our teacher came into the class, stealing this grasper thingy (some random relative of our teacher that he didn't actually know died and he got to take something from his house, so he took this weird claw-on-a-stick for some reason) that was always below the blackboard and moving stuff around with it during class, or, on one occasion, jumping out a window as our teacher was opening the door and just bolting down the football field. edit: Also my shop-teacher, who had a big beard and always wore his shop apron, and who was apparently once a major local politician, loved me because the first day of class he asked everyone why they were here, and after everyone else he asked just looked at him, he asked me I simply said "Because I have to be." One time a guy running for office in Ontario from the opposite party of the shop-teacher came to our high school to do a representation, and the other teachers had to hide him because they were worried about a confrontation. Also one time he duct taped himself to a wall in the cafeteria for a charity and nearly blacked out (he was a really fat guy and proud), and another team for a Movember contest he put Christmas lights in his beard, came into the cafeteria during the lunch before voting, turned off the lights and said "Remember: My beard is the only one that will light up your life." and just walked out.
In my one computer class, the person who shared their computer with me was logged into Google Chrome. When I opened chrome I was greeted with a bright MLP theme, when I looked at his history all he had were links to gay MLP porn. His bookmarks were imgur links to, you guessed it, more MLP porn, as well as a link to a MLP OC ship-fic he was working on. I tried to be nice so I signed him out, cleared his history, and left him a warning that he should log out when he leaves class (I didn't mention the porn). But the next day chrome was back to the way it was. I asked one of the seniors about him and all he said was "Oh yeah, that kid's weird.". I decided to stick with Firefox for the semester.
Hey guys I am back with another tale of a strange individual [b]Pants Man[/b] Ah, yes. Pants Man. The year is 2008. Freshman in college, all is well. In my suite there was a kid who always dressed his finest. All his clothes were well over a hundred dollars per article. Always clean shaven, percise facial features and rather skinny. Hair perfectly kept and parted. He sort of had a subtle Dwight Shrute from The Office tone when he would talk. Now, we met him through his roommate. Rocko. Rocko was a fucking high tense, insane kid, and really dumb. Pants man was extremely quiet, calm, and smart. We always though Rocko was the weirder one. As the year progressed, Pants Man would hang out with our group. We were really impressed by how much he knew. He knew everything, like a walking wikipedia. His parents owned some sort of world class jewelry company, I forget the name. His watch was worth more than my car though. Within a few months, Pants Man was discovered to be one of the weirdest persons I have ever met. He would litterly go home every season, and bring back a whole new wardrobe for that seaon, perfectly color matched, ironed, sorted, everything. He kept 100 pars of pants (jeans) in his room. Each almost identical, but he would brag about the presice stiching and craftsmanship. Soon after, Rocko decided to rummage through his laptop while he was in class. He gathered us all around to share his porn folder. All filled with gore porn. gigabytes of women being sawed in half with dicks in them, people fucking eye sockets, the worst. then he walked in Instead of being really embarrassed, he sat us all down and smugly described the history of gore porn, it's subtleties, and actually convinced us it's a legit normal thing to look at. It was only a few hours later we all snapped back to reality in the cafeteria and realized that was fucking creepy. Now, Pants Man decided he was done with college, but before he left he would become the biggest troll to Rocko there ever was. You see, Rocko was very religious. When he was out, Pants Man wrote "God is Dead" on his side of the room in big letters on his wall. Shit got real. Rocko was already dumb and crazy, so when he saw that, he decided he was GOING TO KILL Pants Man. Not a joke, actually KILL HIM DEAD. He got a knife out of his drawer and came down to the common room shouting that he was going to kill him. Pants Man burst out laughing. "I'd love to see you try you fucking religious faggot" HOLY SHIT. Rocko ran at him, he got up from his troll throne and ran away. The chase lasted almost a half hour through various campus buildings and outside. Mind you this was in January in Vermont, fucking cold. Eventually a big albino student named Sam got in between Rocko and Pants Man and put him in a sleeper hold, the whole time Rocko spazzing out and flailing a knife. Pants Man, being the daft gore-porn-watcher that he is, came BACK to call Rocko a faggot several more times. The ending you say? No one reported Rocko, they went to sleep that night in the same room and nothing came of it since. Pants Man transferred and Rocko is currently a fire fighter in NYC.
but the stabbing would have Pants Man turned on
[QUOTE=MilkBagz;47431071]but the stabbing would have Pants Man turned on[/QUOTE] Um, thats more of pain pleasure instead of what Pants man had, he would've got turned on by doing it to someone else.
One of the kids in my class is trying to download a "safe" version of The Escapists using "very trustworthy sources" on a school computer. I swear, he's going to end up destroying the entire network.
Saw an "otherkin" a week or two ago in the commons. Complete with collar and what I can only hope wasn't an anal-plug tail. Never relocated away from an individual so fast in my life.
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