• Weird Kids At Your School v2 dude wtf are you masturbating in band class
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At least you don't have to deal with that blind bitterness anymore.
A friend of mine keeps coming out with 'black slang', saying shit like 'Bare' for 'Loads' (Bare cash = Loads of cash), despite me always saying 'Bare' means pretty much the complete opposite. I'm the whitest guy ever, and he isn't far away, so every day he'll come out with something new and I'll be confused as fuck.
So there is this asian kid in my school who such a douche to everyone, he will literally insult you, your family, what you like, what you believe, etc. all just to turn around and do the exact same thing. He picks on me for playing tf2 when literally like 1 month ago he spent [B][I]500$[/I][/B] on it. He will go on and on about my modeling items and shit for the game when he can't even make a cube if he tried. He has told me to kill myself and that I'm unwanted, worthless, and ugly (which doesn't help my already existing depression). He has made fun of my mother so many times, about raping her and all that too (I don't have a dad so its a touchy subject.) He "sings" shitty K-Pop songs throughout class, watches nothing but meme videos, sings meme songs, looks at memes, laughs at memes super loudly, and has literally painted a meme for art class once. He is literally a walking asshole meme. If you try to get back at him (or at least talk to him like a normal person) he will make a shitty your mom joke or say a meme, then high five his obese pal and act like hot shit. [B]TL;DR:[/B] [sp2]He's an asshole obsessed with memes.[/sp2]
I have a shit ton of crazy stories to tell. Pick your poison. "Big Mike" The Ugandan Ambassador to Washington DC Master Queef Christian Mingle, Cucks, and Chicken Inspector Faggot Xbox Live Pubic Lice Shenanigans Big Walter Hallway Marine Corps Foreskin Firecracker Dr. Edge Valet Parking Crash
[QUOTE=Radical Rebel;47895537]I have a shit ton of crazy stories to tell. Pick your poison. "Big Mike" The Ugandan Ambassador to DC Master Queef Christian Mingle, Cucks, and Chicken Inspector Faggot Xbox Live Pubic Lice Shenanigans Big Walter Hallway Marine Corps Foreskin Firecracker Dr. Edge Valet Parking Crash[/QUOTE] Hallway Marine Corps sounds fun.
Foreskin Firecracker sounds extremely painful.
I gotta hear about Foreskin Firecracker. Sounds like a wrestler.
[QUOTE=Pastel;47895321]So there is this asian kid in my school who such a douche to everyone, he will literally insult you, your family, what you like, what you believe, etc. all just to turn around and do the exact same thing. He picks on me for playing tf2 when literally like 1 month ago he spent [B][I]500$[/I][/B] on it. He will go on and on about my modeling items and shit for the game when he can't even make a cube if he tried. He has told me to kill myself and that I'm unwanted, worthless, and ugly (which doesn't help my already existing depression). He has made fun of my mother so many times, about raping her and all that too (I don't have a dad so its a touchy subject.) He "sings" shitty K-Pop songs throughout class, watches nothing but meme videos, sings meme songs, looks at memes, laughs at memes super loudly, and has literally painted a meme for art class once. He is literally a walking asshole meme. If you try to get back at him (or at least talk to him like a normal person) he will make a shitty your mom joke or say a meme, then high five his obese pal and act like hot shit. [B]TL;DR:[/B] [sp2]He's an asshole obsessed with memes.[/sp2][/QUOTE] Just respond to literally everything he says with "nice meme". That's it. Nothing else. Make no emotion shown, just "nice meme." He'll either explode or leave you alone.
Beaten to the punch once again... [editline]6th June 2015[/editline] FUCK auto merges.
[QUOTE=Pastel;47895321][b] He will go on and on about my modeling items and shit for the game when he can't even make a cube if he tried.[/b][/QUOTE] This is even funnier and a better insult since blender starts up with a cube by default. :v:
I'll start with Hallway Marine Corps. I'll warn you though, this one is probably the least interesting out of them all. There's always those kids who think they're gonna be in the Marines just because they play COD. Our Highschool is down the street from the recruiting center and every lunch period one of the branches would be giving away free stuff (military themed backpacks,DVDs,memorabilia) if you did push ups. This kid who I'll call John was your typical 15 year old couch potato. He spent the whole lunch period playing WAW Zombies on his phone while rambling on about how hes gonna be a sniper when he enlists. Anyway, lunch finishes and we see the soldiers. Naturally we tell John to prove himself. He reluctantly steps up and asks for a DVD. The soldier is obviously offended by his Black Ops II shirt and tells he that he has to "earn it by doing 15 push-ups" John gets on his hands and knees and starts doing the "girl pushup" method. The soldier has a disgusted look on his face and shakes his head. When he finishes 15 he tells him to do it over "the real way". John got to one, fell on his face, broke his glasses and walked off crying. [editline]6th June 2015[/editline] Foreskin Firecracker: There was a kid in my 3rd grade class named Henry. He had no friends so that meant my mother encouraged me to be friends with him so he "doesn't feel lonely". This kid was Charles Manson levels of crazy. He burnt ants with magnifying glasses, scrawled demonic looking creatures on the walls, did the Sonic/Naruto run and all sorts of other crazy shit. Anyway, he ate one of those "Atomic Fireball" candies at recess as part of his "performance" to come. After we went inside he asked some of us (me and 4 other guys) to go into the bathroom to see a "magic trick". He unzipped his pants, took out his dick and gripped the foreskin of it. Since this kid weighed atleast 150 pounds (this was the 3rd grade) we were too afraid to leave. All of a sudden he started pissing which caused a ballooning effect on his dicks foreskin. Then the inevitable happened, he lost his grip and we were all drenched in his piss. To make matters worse I shared lockers with the kid. He left his socks and soiled underwear in there to rot over February vacation once. Forgive any grammatical errors since I'm trying to type this fast. I have other stories of him too since he was my best friend at the time.
[QUOTE=draugur;47895616]Just respond to literally everything he says with "nice meme". That's it. Nothing else. Make no emotion shown, just "nice meme." He'll either explode or leave you alone.[/QUOTE] Actually, the best respond is "dank meme" [editline]7th June 2015[/editline] [QUOTE=Radical Rebel;47895670] [editline]6th June 2015[/editline] Foreskin Firecracker [/QUOTE] You know, with a name like that, I was expecting him to do something crazier. Like shoving a fire cracking in his penis.
I'm in 7th grade and there's some 6th graders and I overheard them talking about this other 6th grader that still sleeps with stuffed animals LOL. He doesn't even know what a naked girl booby and privates look like.
Back in elementary (I think it was 5th grade) there were these three kids that started a big fight at recess when two of them told the third kid they wanted to make a Sonic game when they got older, but he told them it was impossible and that they'd go to prison for copyright infringement.
[QUOTE=christarp;47896803]I'm in 7th grade and there's some 6th graders and I overheard them talking about this other 6th grader that still sleeps with stuffed animals LOL. He doesn't even know what a naked girl booby and privates look like.[/QUOTE] What the fuck? What kind of plebeian doesn't even know what a naked girl booby and privates look like?
[QUOTE=Radical Rebel;47895537]I have a shit ton of crazy stories to tell. Pick your poison. "Big Mike" The Ugandan Ambassador to Washington DC Master Queef Christian Mingle, Cucks, and Chicken Inspector Faggot Xbox Live Pubic Lice Shenanigans Big Walter Hallway Marine Corps Foreskin Firecracker Dr. Edge Valet Parking Crash[/QUOTE] Yah know what, let's go with Dr. Edge and Christian Mingle, Cucks, and Chicken
[QUOTE=alpha00zero;47884862]Speaking of weirdly cool teachers, my Biology teacher in High School had his own ways of teaching. Here's a few: -He would randomly belt out a massive scream which would wake up even an hibernating bear. This was done at random, sometimes once, sometimes twice, sometimes never. It kept us concentrated. Well, most of us. Other were only listening to avoid getting a heart attack. -He made us believe two things. One was a injured left arm. He had trouble using it and it was clear, even if he had quite the fat muscle mass. Two that he had an identical twin bother and that one day, he became his substitute. I doubted for the longest time because the dude was a lefty THE WHOLE TIME! And it was for one day. -He gave to students nicknames (nothing insulting of course) based on their names. All except me because, well he couldn't find anything that he liked. Points for trying tho. -Last name being Armstrong, he would often joke about the astronaut and would often talk of him like he knew him personally. Almost like a family member. -Last one, he would reserve the entire auditorium for his class groups for revisions, a day or two before the exams. He would revisit lessons and tell us what to study for the exams and remove the unnecessary stuff. He would always highly suggest to go there and yes, those who didn't go were the ones who had bad marks. Great teacher. Fucked with our minds. 10/10.[/QUOTE] I think I've talked about this guy before, but this guy reminds me of my highschool physics teacher. He has a known habit of boring himself with his own lessons. So he tends to do stupid/interesting things. Like one time when we all finished our atomics work way too early, he decided he'd spend the rest of the class talking about the physics behind nukes and the history behind all the nuclear tests. Another time when we were all doing random revision by ourselves, he decided he's just throw his game of Civ V on the projector and screw around for a bit (this is where I point out that he's English and refuses to play as any country except England). During the same lesson, he also admitted he's pretty big into the MGS franchise. And one especially-memorable time, we were all walking into his class after lunch to find that the bench we normally put our bags on was taken up by the guy's fucking [I]speargun.[/I] When we asked what the hell it was doing there, he just replied "I'm going diving after this". My school was quite literally filled with awesome teachers. Like my German teacher who actively used Hitler analogies when he needed a good example. Or my Social Studies teacher who used Call of Duty to teach history. Or my calculus teacher who moonlights as a pilot and showed us clips of him doing below-the-treeline aerobatics to get us interested.
[QUOTE=Pilotguy97;47897471]Or my Social Studies teacher who used Call of Duty to teach history.[/QUOTE] What?
[QUOTE=Kierany9;47897589]What?[/QUOTE] Probably "And here's what they got wrong. Again."
[QUOTE=Kierany9;47897589]What?[/QUOTE] Presumably the older games - the battle of Stalingrad and all that jazz.
[QUOTE=Radical Rebel;47895537] Christian Mingle, Cucks, and Chicken Inspector Faggot[/QUOTE] I would like to hear about these two.
We used to have a kid in high school who used to play air instruments if you paid him. He had like set prices, it was 20p for the whole thing where he'd start playing air drums, guitar, singing the lot, if you wanted just one instrument it was 5p. Eventually he started putting his prices up so we stopped paying him. It was hilarious because we used to barter with him when he put his prices up. We also had another kid, totally strange had the thickest glasses you'd ever seen so his eyes looked huge, anyway he hatched a plan to go to the canteen and get some plastic spoons and a ruler to dig a tunnel underneath the school gates, he called himself the underminer from the incredibles. Finally there was a crazy girl who was tiny and had the strangest voice, she always thought people were talking about her though they wasn't and then she'd suddenly stand on the tables and tell everyone to fuck off and throw her books all over the place. There was one time where she was reading what appeared to be Pokemon fan fiction (NSFW as fuck) and I tapped the screen on her phone and holy shit she nearly bit off my hand literally.
[QUOTE=christarp;47896803]I'm in 7th grade and there's some 6th graders and I overheard them talking about this other 6th grader that still sleeps with stuffed animals LOL. He doesn't even know what a naked girl booby and privates look like.[/QUOTE] Did you join this site when you were 3?
[QUOTE=draugur;47895616]Just respond to literally everything he says with "nice meme". That's it. Nothing else. Make no emotion shown, just "nice meme." He'll either explode or leave you alone.[/QUOTE] I have done that before, he just then pokes back at the fact that I'm "stupid" and makes more memes. I'd totally beat him up but there are 2 drawbacks: 1.) I can't fight for my life. 2.) He's a [B][I]fucking black belt[/I][/B], and teaches karate. It sucks because he really finds a way to make me unbelievably angry and so it's like it's no use to do anything but sit there and take insults like a pussy. Shit sucks. He's so insufferable that even if you make him feel like shit he will call his friend to back him up with some more memes, he puts on this cool kid facade but hes a huge fucking nerd that makes me want to die.
[QUOTE=Pastel;47898352]I have done that before, he just then pokes back at the fact that I'm "stupid" and makes more memes. I'd totally beat him up but there are 2 drawbacks: 1.) I can't fight for my life. 2.) He's a [B][I]fucking black belt[/I][/B], and teaches karate. It sucks because he really finds a way to make me unbelievably angry and so it's like it's no use to do anything but sit there and take insults like a pussy. Shit sucks. He's so insufferable that even if you make him feel like shit he will call his friend to back him up with some more memes, he puts on this cool kid facade but hes a huge fucking nerd that makes me want to die.[/QUOTE] Thicken your skin! Not trying to sound too harsh but you can thicken your skin, and try and get backup from your friends if shit goes down. Just try that and continue to wind him up!
[QUOTE=Pastel;47898352]I have done that before, he just then pokes back at the fact that I'm "stupid" and makes more memes. I'd totally beat him up but there are 2 drawbacks: 1.) I can't fight for my life. 2.) He's a [B][I]fucking black belt[/I][/B], and teaches karate. It sucks because he really finds a way to make me unbelievably angry and so it's like it's no use to do anything but sit there and take insults like a pussy. Shit sucks. He's so insufferable that even if you make him feel like shit he will call his friend to back him up with some more memes, he puts on this cool kid facade but hes a huge fucking nerd that makes me want to die.[/QUOTE] At this point, you'll need to act like a smug asshole to make them mad.
Posting the stories soon, I got a lot of shit to do before hand so it might take a while.
Christian Mingle, Cuckholds, and Chicken McNuggets This story kind of ties in to the Ugandan Ambassador of Washington DC (the McNuggets part at-least) so I'll leave that out for now. There was this kid who I've known since Kindergarten by the name of Carl. (Fake name) He had a load of quirks, most notably including owning a chastity ring (dubbed the virginity ring by my group of friends). I'll tell you a few scenarios over the years with him. Cutting off here since I have writers block right now so I guess its a teaser.
[QUOTE=Pastel;47898352]I have done that before, he just then pokes back at the fact that I'm "stupid" and makes more memes. I'd totally beat him up but there are 2 drawbacks: 1.) I can't fight for my life. 2.) He's a [B][I]fucking black belt[/I][/B], and teaches karate. It sucks because he really finds a way to make me unbelievably angry and so it's like it's no use to do anything but sit there and take insults like a pussy. Shit sucks. He's so insufferable that even if you make him feel like shit he will call his friend to back him up with some more memes, he puts on this cool kid facade but hes a huge fucking nerd that makes me want to die.[/QUOTE] a black belt is just a piece of cloth. kick his ass, make him hurt. or, better yet, be nice to him. imagine everything he says to you is sarcastic. Like, if he says "kill yourself," you say, "ok, why not?"
[QUOTE=Blazedol;47901227]a black belt is just a piece of cloth. kick his ass, make him hurt. or, better yet, be nice to him. imagine everything he says to you is sarcastic. Like, if he says "kill yourself," you say, "ok, why not?"[/QUOTE] It's not about the piece of cloth, it's about what the piece of cloth symbolizes. If you can't fight, you don't want to go against someone who's trained in self-defense. Someone who's at an intermediary level would probably kick his ass, so what the fuck do you think he will accomplish fighting someone who's highly advanced and studied martial arts for a long time. "Him being highly advanced karate doesn't matter at all! Go fight him anyway."
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