Describe your favorite game, and make it sound as shitty as possible.
130 replies, posted
Dungeons and Draugr: The Wonders of Copy Paste edition
Run around and shoot people in this old game with really low graphics, and really horribly optimized. The game is mostly centered about cosmetic items and is filled to the brim with hackers.
So you're this guy that they couldn't think of a good name for, you're just "number 1" or some shit. D'ohboy this is gonna be great I can already tell
First game puts you in an alien war with aliens who are obviously ripped from wing commander. Fuck its like the whole thing is a wing commander rip but in order to hide it like 3 missions in they throw in this new alien race that just wrecks everything. cat-people get their homeworld stomped and we're supposed to care or something and then the game ends with us shooting at a red spikey space lobster inside a tube of toothpaste.
Second game is like the first one, except instead of hating cat people now we hate ourselves because they hate the cat people. Oh and instead of a red spiky space lobster now its a red, even bigger, and spikey-err space claw that blows up stars. How exciting.
You play as a bear in tight yellow shorts and your job is to collect shit, all game long.
grim fandango
dude this game sucks cause you actually have to go up to stuff to interact with it
plus the graphics are so shitty it's like 1909 up in here
and the game also features cut scenes that you can't skip
worst game
Metro 2033: Subway systems and giant rats.
You're out dealing with spreadsheets and checking on line graphs to look for a profit margin or some shit.
And the devs genuinely believed the fact that you're in space made it more fun.
bunch of faggots
fucking
so there's this 7 year old game called Titan Quest
it's a total pain in the ass without buying the expansion, Immortal Throne, I mean you can't even store items or swap them between characters without it, or respec skills
it is long as [i]fuck[/i] and a lot of that is just massive levels, there are a ton of places where you actually have to find your way out of them and into the next area
it's really unlikely you'll ever get a full set of armor (that doesn't suck -- looking at you, necromancer set), even if you try farming bosses
getting the reagents to make artifacts is a fucking chore, I cba to hunt 500 boars to get 5 pelts
the voice acting is totally immersion breaking, I can recognize a single guy's voice that gets used for both greeks and chinese and they've even got that Steve Blum that's been in everything (he also does two voices, general leonidas of sparta and zeus, I mean [i]god[/i])
there's a ton of talking and lore and mythology of the ancient greeks and egyptians and chinese, and that's just awful, you should never have to read
it took me 32 hours to beat the game the first time and that's only 4 acts, there's still two harder difficulties that I haven't unlocked yet and I'm only halfway done leveling, ugh
basically the game is just a total ripoff of diablo 2, you might have noticed that it's an isometric arpg and last I checked only diablo is allowed to do that???
[editline]14th March 2013[/editline]
there's also no drm to stop the hackers, and a readily available tool called the 'defiler,' so you can give yourself infinite skills and attribute points and everything and jump right into multiplayer and wreck shit
I mean, the devs went out of business lmao, I don't think anyone even owns the rights to it now that THQ is gone
I don't even know why I play this shitty ass game. You play a faux-russian immigrant to new york city and go bowling with your slummy cousin and get drunk every once and a while. Oh and you can drive cars.
You play as some generic space marine with the most idiotic voice ever, you smash rats and bugs with your fist. Then you pick up some food and ammo for your weapons, in vain because you always die due to some some disease and poison.
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