Girlfriend of 1 year open to the idea of a threesome. Do it? - General

Well we're pretty comfortable with pretty much everything about each other. I mean, we dutch oven each other once in a while as a joke. We have never had any major arguments, just minor disagreements that lasted all of a few hours. We also just laugh off awkward situations, so I don't really see that being much of an issue after. We're going strong too, as far as I could tell neither of us has ever questioned our relationship or feelings for each other. I probably won't go through with it though, unless she pushes me for it. I don't really want to risk messing up something this good

Make her pick the girl. Worst thing that could happen is that they get started without you. You or your girl don't like how it's going? Kick that ho out and get back to what you were doing.

There's 4 possibilities I'm aware of: A) She actually wants to do this B) She's worried you want to do this and if she isn't open to it it might mess things up C) She's testing you D) She's conflicted about her sexuality and wants to experiment without going behind your back Honestly since I know literally nothing about the girl, it would be silly of me to try and guess which it is, so just use your best judgement and be really careful if you're serious about the relationship. Honestly consider C though even if it sounds unlike her, the number of people who have been fooled by this is frankly staggering. D has also happened to a number of people I know with varying results. I mean I started seeing my ex briefly after being broken up for 3 years and the only person she dated in between was a girl. Without knowing anything about you and her, the best I can say is approach things super cautiously and leave everything in her control. Make sure she knows that you're happy the way things are and if she has any hesitations about wanting to, you don't wanna do it.

no holy shit no

With all the media making threesomes appear to be the toppests of tops of things guys wants, I'll just tell you that they're overrated, and unless both of you TRULY want it and one of you isn't just doing it in fear of losing the other, just don't do it

[QUOTE=Elspin;47393355] C) She's testing you [/QUOTE] If you mean they would say "wanna have a threesome?" and then hold it against you if you say yes, that is infuriatingly manipulative.

I'd say if you were dating 2-4 years maybe consider after some talks.

dump her because she's not faithful or satisfied with you.

My girl and I are actually looking for a girl to have a threesome with. Our relationships a little of a year and a half long at this point and we're relaxed and comfy of each other. She's bisexual so I definitely get the idea that it is something we could both enjoy. I think the easiest way of thinking of it is that one, it is something that you should try if you get the chance, and that the third person is really just an extra way for you to make your partner feel better. Though finding the right chick(or dude if it's M/M/F) is another problem entirely. And whether you choose it to be someone you actually know or just looking for someone on the internet both pose some issues to consider while choosing. Also, a little background. She was not a virgin before me but she was less experienced, and while I'm slightly more experienced, my experiences were pretty much cut and dry standard sex. We're basically each other's firsts for a lot of different sexual things, so when she suggested it I didn't see any harm in it. Now she is slightly jealous, but she's definitely not anywhere close to where she was at the beginning of our relationship. I plan on letting her just hang out with whoever she picks for a while before we actually engage in the threesome so she can be comfortable with her. But seriously, if you're both mature enough to handle it, go for it. All these people saying that the threesome could ruin the relationship aren't really all that justified. It could ignite already existing problems, or be the breaking point, but it won't ruin the relationship on it's own.

[QUOTE=Mort Stroodle;47394733]If you mean they would say "wanna have a threesome?" and then hold it against you if you say yes, that is infuriatingly manipulative.[/QUOTE] ...it sure is, but it'd be far from the first time it's happened. That, and questions where either answer will have them really mad at you, plead the fifth :v: [sp]My ex once asked me if I liked her hair straight (straightened) or curly (natural). I told her I wouldn't answer, because she'd be mad either way. If I said straight, she'd be mad that I didn't like her natural hairstyle, and if I said curly she'd be mad that I didn't appreciate the effort she put in to make it straight. She conceded the question was totally an unintentional trap and we had a laugh about it[/sp]

My advice, is let your girlfriend choose. And only if she pursues it. If you try to make it happen and choose the 3rd girl, it'll backfire. I've done it once, it was okay, the other girl wasn't that good. But lucky for me, she moved far away for college like a week later. So I won't have to worry about any conflict.

Been there done that... Believe me it brings up a LOT of problems in the future. Its all trust and being comfortable, but in the end based on my experiences its just another problem thrown in the crock-pot just marinating for a future argument to be cooked. An argument you wish never to had been tasted....

disgusting sex havers

Don't do it unless she's a nymphomaniac and really wants it. If she's just "open to it," don't do it. And even then, there's the problem of finding another girl that'd willingly do it and doesn't have STDs.

What's with facepunchers assuming everyone they don't know has an STD?

[QUOTE=CoilingTesla;47395250]What's with facepunchers assuming everyone they don't know has an STD?[/QUOTE] Better safe than sorry. [editline]25th March 2015[/editline] Also OP, go for it only if the two of you are 100% sure you both want this. And let her pick the girl. Every guy dreams about having a threesome at least once in their lives. Make us proud by being one of the few who get to experience it.

You should gauge if she's jealous/insecure fire before that. And right afterward, [I]do not[/I] even smile back at any other women if they flirt with you. Also, make sure that the person has done a three way before and doesn't get attached. That's the last thing you want when you're walking around Mall of America with your wife/girlfriend and family member is to have some clingy woman allude to it in front of them.

if you value your relationship more than your sex life, don't I've seen shit like this break so many relationships

If you do this, make sure you [B]both[/B] give all your attention to the third person. If you both just focus on pleasing and giving the attention to the third person she [I]hopefully[/I] won't feel jealous and vice versa.

Thank you all for your suggestions and advice. They've brought to light perspectives and possibilities I never would have seen myself. I've decided to leave it be unless she continues to encourage me, and if that does happen, I will have her choose the third person, and I won't influence the choice.

just remember to sit back and enjoy the ride.

wait until you're married, that's what jesus says

Yes, you should hae a threesome, but only if I'm a part of it.

[QUOTE=inebriaticxp;47404106]wait until you're married, that's what jesus says[/QUOTE] That makes them swingers then :v: