Porn and video game addiction are leading to 'masculinity crisis', says Stanford prison experiment p - Polidicks - Facepunch Forum

Porn and video game addiction are leading to 'masculinity crisis', says Stanford prison experiment p

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Hahahahaha Zimbardo lmao

[QUOTE=itisjuly;47704621]Are you serious? You don't even need to be a gym rat. Students have tons of free time, an hour in the gym each day will do a lot of good for a person.[/QUOTE] Not everyone wants to spend an hour in the gym every fucking day, never mind that gyms can have quite an intimidating atmosphere.

[QUOTE=Doom14;47704607]Victim blaming is always fun, lads![/QUOTE] I blame the victim if after bullying he shuts in and doesn't try to fight his demons.

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704637]Not everyone wants[/QUOTE] In that case you're right. There's nothing else to discuss on that topic.

[QUOTE=Doom14;47704607]Victim blaming is always fun, lads![/QUOTE] So if I leave my door open and someone comes in and steal my stuff, no one can say to me "You should have closed the door."?

[QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704638]I blame the victim if after bullying he shuts in and doesn't try to fight his demons.[/QUOTE] Why do you expect people to go through a bunch of unenjoyable shit? Not everyone wants to constantly have to fight with people, both physically and socially, all the time. Eventually it gets to the point where the benefits aren't worth the downsides which is why you get shut in types

[QUOTE=itisjuly;47704483]I don't understand what you're trying to say here.[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704487]Dude but you have friends and you are not a shut in. You don't consider yourself masculine, but you are sure socially functioning. The article is about people absolutely fucked, no friends and no activities. [/QUOTE] I've been in that state before, been completely alone and had no activities or friends or even a will to move wake up the next day. But it's not masculinity that fixed that. My problem is that people think they know what's best for everyone else and 9 times out of 10 they have no clue. Telling someone "what you do makes you less masculine than you should be and that's why your life sucks" is stupid.

Society is made of people. How do you expect society to improve if people do not wish to improve?

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704637]Not everyone wants to spend an hour in the gym every fucking day, never mind that gyms can have quite an intimidating atmosphere.[/QUOTE] Gyms have an atmosphere of brotherhood. When I started working out I was scared people would laugh at me because I was skinny as fuck. Instead people mostly didnt give a fuck and helped me when I asked (at sometimes when I wasn't asked). Also whenever you come to our gym (our gym is in the basement of our dorm) you shake hands with everyone. It's an unspoken rule, but it feels kinda nice. You shame hands with that 110 kg bull and with that skinny pale guy who came today for the first time. Don't know if such things persist everywhere. Also its not a matter of opinions whether you should have exercise at least a few hours a week. Not nececarily gym. But you do need it, period. [editline]12th May 2015[/editline] [QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704653]Why do you expect people to go through a bunch of unenjoyable shit? Not everyone wants to constantly have to fight with people, both physically and socially, all the time. Eventually it gets to the point where the benefits aren't worth the downsides which is why you get shut in types[/QUOTE] Life is not all enjoyable. Sorry, life is hard. I expect people to go throught a bunch of unejoyable shit because the world is not ideal. And I don't want it to be. Amazing things don't happen easily, amazing things are not made by couch potatoes. I dont really care what everyone "wants". There is a bunch of stuff people need and what's needed comes before what's wanted. Happiness is when these overlap, but sometimes you don't get the choice and just need to do what's needed. In that sense - no one wants fights every day. So they should do something to not have fights every day. If you can. Sometimes shutting in is the only option though. I have got nothing against people who have no choice, they are not to be blamed for anything. An example may include an imigrant kid studying in a school and being the only one of his ethnicity and being bullied for it.

[QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704638]I blame the victim if after bullying he shuts in and doesn't try to fight his demons.[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=itisjuly;47704610]If you have a choice to not be a victim, why do you choose to be?[/QUOTE] I take it neither of you have been subjected to any real bullying outside of verbal pattywack before? But sure, tell the local asthmatic scrawny kid that he needs to stand up to the school's linebacker and see how well that goes. Not everyone is gifted with the chance to stand their ground without drastically exacerbating the issue, or in turn, making it much worse off for themselves. Just wait until you see it in the business world - where if you don't back down or manuver with absolute percision and know-how, you can be out of a job or worse. [QUOTE=Ragekipz;47704649]So if I leave my door open and someone comes in and steal my stuff, no one can say to me "You should have closed the door."?[/QUOTE] It'd be really awesome of society could move on to a point where you didn't need to worry about a locked door, but that's entirely beyond what we're talking about here. You're arguing a mistake over common sense versus the issue at hand - people needing to "stand up for themselves." [QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704661]Gyms have an atmosphere of brotherhood.[/QUOTE] Entirely subjective poppycock. I've seen gyms where everyone basically knew one another by name and it was supportive as all get-out, like you said. But, I've also seem gyms were at best, no one talks, and at worst, are filled with miscreants who use their time to publicly self-ogle for an hour.

[QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704661] Life is not all enjoyable. Sorry, life is hard. I expect people to go throught a bunch of unejoyable shit because the world is not ideal. And I don't want it to be. Amazing things don't happen easily, amazing things are not made by couch potatoes. I dont really care what everyone "wants". There is a bunch of stuff people need and what's needed comes before what's wanted. Happiness is when these overlap, but sometimes you don't get the choice and just need to do what's needed.[/QUOTE] I'm sorry but if society has made it so that being a shut in is actually a preferable alternative than going out and trying to be social then the problem isn't with the shut ins, they're just picking the best alternative for them.

[QUOTE=Doom14;47704691]I take it neither of you have been subjected to any real bullying outside of verbal pattywack before? But sure, tell the local asthmatic scrawny kid that he needs to stand up to the school's linebacker and see how well that goes. Not everyone is gifted with the chance to stand their ground without drastically exacerbating the issue, or in turn, making it much worse off for themselves. Just wait until you see it in the business world - where if you don't back down or manuver with absolute percision and know-how, you can be out of a job or worse. [/QUOTE] He said later in life. If you finish school but are still a victim from past events, that's your choice at this point. [editline]11th May 2015[/editline] [QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704693]I'm sorry but if society has made it so that being a shut in is actually a preferable alternative than going out and trying to be social then the problem isn't with the shut ins, they're just picking the best alternative for them.[/QUOTE]How is being a shut in a preferable alternative?

[QUOTE=Doom14;47704691] Not everyone is gifted with the chance to stand their ground without drastically exacerbating the issue, or in turn, making it much worse off for themselves. Just wait until you see it in the business world - where if you don't back down or manuver with absolute percision and know-how, you can be out of a job or worse. [/QUOTE] Then you move. Change school. Find strong friends. Report your enemy to someone. And if nothing, absolutely nothing works, then you avoid him. You shut in to him and his friends. That doesn't mean you should be a shut in to other people though.

[QUOTE=itisjuly;47704709] How is being a shut in a preferable alternative?[/QUOTE] Because it avoids a lot of unpleasant bullshit, I mean why do you think people turn to it?

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704728]Because it avoids a lot of unpleasant bullshit, I mean why do you think people turn to it?[/QUOTE]If you want to succeed you will need to go through a lot of unpleasant shit. Running away is not an option for success. If you choose to hide, that's your choice but you can't blame your lack of effort onto society. There are people who went from dirt to be outstanding. There is no one but yourself to blame if you do not wish to face the hardships.

[QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704721][B]Then you move. Change school.[/B] Find strong friends. [B]Report your enemy to someone.[/B] [B]And if nothing, absolutely nothing works, then you avoid him. You shut in to him and his friends.[/B] That doesn't mean you should be a shut in to other people though.[/QUOTE] Everything bolded is not "standing up to the issue", it's "running away" and might not be considered "manly" by societal norms. Reporting, from what little I've seen in the schools I've been to, has done nothing or made the situation worse. Granted, that was back in middle and high. By college, people usually are mature enough to cut that shit out. Finding strong friends is the only solution there I've ever seen work, and that's granted that you can make that friend in the first place.

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704693]I'm sorry but if society has made it so that being a shut in is actually a preferable alternative than going out and trying to be social then the problem isn't with the shut ins, they're just picking the best alternative for them.[/QUOTE] I actually wanted to diasgree, but have to agree. It's not "best alternative", it's the most lucrative and simple one so it seems best in short term. Society really doesn't give the problem enough attention and that's the real problem. People should help people in such situations to deal with them and not run away from them. Otherwise future shut ins see no other path but hiding and so they do it. This is what happened in my case at least, I lacked any guidance so I chose the only way I saw. However I think it has nothing to do with masculinity standards.

[QUOTE=itisjuly;47704742]If you want to succeed you will need to go through a lot of unpleasant shit. Running away is not an option for success. If you choose to hide, that's your choice but you can't blame your lack of effort onto society. There are people who went from dirt to be outstanding. There is no one but yourself to blame if you do not wish to face the hardships.[/QUOTE] Okay but you're missing there's different levels that different people go through The attractive faced, big framed 6'4" guy is probably going to go through a lot less unpleasant bullshit than the skinny little 5'6" guy with acne and a feminine looking face. The reason shut ins end up happening is because it ends up being too much and they shut themselves off, which isn't helped by society completely ignoring the issues of men because it thinks men should deal with everything themselves.

[QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704721]Then you move. Change school. Find strong friends. Report your enemy to someone. And if nothing, absolutely nothing works, then you avoid him. You shut in to him and his friends. That doesn't mean you should be a shut in to other people though.[/QUOTE] You've legitimately haven't ever dealt with bullies ever have you? Moving isn't actually fixing the problem at hand, same thing with changing schools. And even if that is an option, what if your parents aren't wealthy enough to actually move, or can't move or they'd lose their job? And find "strong friends" lmao, as if that does anything. Doesn't matter who your friends are, bullies will still be bullies. And in my experience, and the experiences of people I know who have been bullied, schools have done little to nothing to actually addressing the issue of bullying. In my case, the kid that bullied me for 3 fucking years had no actual punishment laid down, nor was the root cause of his behavior every looked into. He was given fucking candy by the principal on multiple occasions, and my side of the story never fucking mattered. He tormented me on a daily basis about my weight, my looks, my hobbies, anything that didn't line up with his big macho fat ass. Nearly every day I was called gay by him and his fucking cronies because I wasn't lining up with society's norms of what's "manly".

Can't say I disagree with him. Video games are practically my drug, and I'm hardly motivated to do anything else except go to my job, get paid, and buy more video games. Can't really say the same for porn though. Probably about 30 minutes a week of that.

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704768]Okay but you're missing there's different levels that different people go through The attractive faced, big framed 6'4" guy is probably going to go through a lot less unpleasant bullshit than the skinny little 5'6" guy with acne and a feminine looking face. The reason shut ins end up happening is because it ends up being too much and they shut themselves off, which isn't helped by society completely ignoring the issues of men because it thinks men should deal with everything themselves.[/QUOTE] So what do we do about this?

[QUOTE=Doom14;47704746]Everything bolded is not "standing up to the issue", it's "running away" and might not be considered "manly" by societal norms. Reporting, from what little I've seen in the schools I've been to, has done nothing or made the situation worse. Granted, that was back in middle and high. By college, people usually are mature enough to cut that shit out. Finding strong friends is the only solution there I've ever seen work, and that's granted that you can make that friend in the first place.[/QUOTE] Yeah it's not standing up, but it solves the problem. If you move it's not gonna make situation worse (until your bully follows you for some reason?). Reporting is tricky for sure, but it might work. The idea is that you have a problem of bullying and when solving it you shouldn't give a single fuck about "manly" standards. Fuck chivalry, you are in trouble. If running away by changing school will make sure you don't have to hate every day of school for a few years ahead - do it. Look like a coward, but save your psychic from massive harm. In long term its wise. Anything goes really. Also if I found out someone moved from school due to bullying he would gain some masculinity points in my eyes because I would know:this guy handles a problem.

Why don't you know instead, actually try to solve the issue of bullying? Running away doesn't fucking fix that.

[QUOTE=bdd458;47704769]You've legitimately haven't ever dealt with bullies ever have you? Moving isn't actually fixing the problem at hand, same thing with changing schools. And even if that is an option, what if your parents aren't wealthy enough to actually move, or can't move or they'd lose their job? And find "strong friends" lmao, as if that does anything. Doesn't matter who your friends are, bullies will still be bullies. And in my experience, and the experiences of people I know who have been bullied, schools have done little to nothing to actually addressing the issue of bullying. In my case, the kid that bullied me for 3 fucking years had no actual punishment laid down, nor was the root cause of his behavior every looked into. He was given fucking candy by the principal on multiple occasions, and my side of the story never fucking mattered. He tormented me on a daily basis about my weight, my looks, my hobbies, anything that didn't line up with his big macho fat ass. Nearly every day I was called gay by him and his fucking cronies because I wasn't lining up with society's norms of what's "manly".[/QUOTE] Schools indeed have a problem. I already said what you do if you can't change the situation. You shut in. From these people. But you never give up. I was bullied in school, but I found friends outside of school and that saved me from alot.

[QUOTE=itisjuly;47704781]So what do we do about this?[/QUOTE] Maybe give more attention to male problems? Stop shaming men who end up in trouble they can't solve themselves? Stop glorifying male aggression all the time? The point is, you can't blame the shut ins and the video games for a problem caused by society.

[QUOTE=bdd458;47704794]Why don't you know instead, actually try to solve the issue of bullying? Running away doesn't fucking fix that.[/QUOTE] How? Imagine. High school. You are bullied. You still have a few years ahead. You tried standing up and it didn't work, you are too weak. You are asking your parents to move. They say:"Why don't you know instead, actually try to solve the issue of bullying? Running away doesn't fucking fix that." I would probably suicide. How can you, a lonely person, change the way people fundamentally think? Bullying is the echo of our animal nature. It's about domination, it's one of the pillars of the ways we speak. What can you, one man in highschool, do to change the way the world works? I would rather move and make sure my life goes on without bullying than try to fight the world alone.

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704797]Maybe give more attention to male problems? Stop shaming men who end up in trouble they can't solve themselves? Stop glorifying male aggression all the time? The point is, you can't blame the shut ins and the video games for a problem caused by society.[/QUOTE] Yeah I agree on that, men do not get enough support in the current system. But how do you actually achieve all that? If it's an issue many don't take seriously, how do you put it out as a legitimate issue?

@MuffinZerg: No, society needs to change which is my entire point we need to collectively look at American society and attempt to fix it. You're either purposefully missing the point and just threadshitting, or legitimately think that. I really hope it's the former.

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;47704797]Maybe give more attention to male problems? Stop shaming men who end up in trouble they can't solve themselves? Stop glorifying male aggression all the time? The point is, you can't blame the shut ins and the video games for a problem caused by society.[/QUOTE] Nobody is blaming video games or shut ins. But video games help shut ins find comfort, making them remain shut ins. We are just saying that a standard for masculinity doesn't prevent you from going outside, taking part in activities, not spending the whole day on games or other entertainment, not socialising.

[QUOTE=MuffinZerg;47704813]How? Imagine. High school. You are bullied. You still have a few years ahead. You tried standing up and it didn't work, you are too weak. You are asking your parents to move. They say:"Why don't you know instead, actually try to solve the issue of bullying? Running away doesn't fucking fix that." I would probably suicide. How can you, a lonely person, change the way people fundamentally think? Bullying is the echo of our animal nature. It's about domination, it's one of the pillars of the ways we speak. What can you, one man in highschool, do to change the way the world works? I would rather move and make sure my life goes on without bullying than try to fight the world alone.[/QUOTE] It isn't about what one person can do, it's about what society can do to change itself. You people keep saying 'Oh well it's too bad but you gotta deal with it'. You people are defeated. You have given up. You have said clearly that the suffering is fine, it's to be expected, and we shouldn't do anything about it. Why should we give up? Why shouldn't we care?

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