Teenagers disgusted by Bristol police giving out 'R U Asking 4 It?' leaflets at sexual consent talk - Polidicks

Fifteen years from now they will hand out similar leaflets, except with rage faces and ancient internet memes like "arrow to the knee".

[QUOTE=Limed00d;50701910]for some, this is a very difficult concept to grasp.but no, let's blame it on the clothing they wear, on the substances they consume, let's put the weight on the [I]victims[/I] and not on the [I]criminals[/I]. I find that very abhorrent. glad she stood up to it.[/QUOTE] I agree with you. There's still steps a sensible person should do. Like not taking a drink from strangers, not going away with a stranger and countless of other things - bad people are going to do bad things and it pays to be at least somewhat careful. In the same way like you wouldn't walk with gold jewelry into the bad part of town were muggings happen regularly or be a tourist carrying excessive amounts of cash. Mind you, this applies to the perhaps smallest segments of rapes - stranger on stranger rather than people that know each other. The leaflet was probably badly constructed (instead rather than are u asking 4 it, it should have been titled something like take care, but don't be afraid to come forward if something happens), but one shouldn't completely disregard the message.

This is hilarious. I thought the pamphlets were to be interpreted as "Are you asking for consent?" not "Are you dressing to be raped?" Fucked up.

When someone gets robbed playing Pokemon Go at a shady spot at 2 AM, people say they should have been smarter than that. When someone tells women advice on how to take precautions to avoid rape, people say it's victim blaming.

[QUOTE=KillerJaguar;50703481]When someone gets robbed playing Pokemon Go at a shady spot at 2 AM, people say they should have been smarter than that. When someone tells women advice on how to take precautions to avoid rape, people say it's victim blaming.[/QUOTE] There's a big difference between "hey don't drink alone at a pub with random strangers who you've never talked to, that could be dangerou" and "are you dressing like a whore you slut you deserved it." Precautions? Sure. But saying "R U Asking 4 It" isn't precautionary - it's implying that it's your fault for "asking for it." Going out and playing Pokemon Go at night is stupid, but it wasn't their fault they got robbed, just liked going into a bar half-naked and wasted is stupid, but it isn't your fault if you get raped. The robbers and the rapists - the criminals - are at fault.

I may be out of turn saying this, but I hope people realise that 'asking for it' is a pretty common expression in Britain. It's quite normal to say someone was asking for it if they don't take precaution, not that they were literally asking for something to happen- "He was asking for it, drinking before driving". Just wanted to clarify for people who don't have English as their first language.

[QUOTE=Buck.;50702324]But that's implying that all car accidents are caused by the drivers themselves. You could be driving in perfect accordance to the traffic regulations yet a drunk or suicidal driver may slam into you as is very often the case. It wouldn't be your fault for dying in that car crash, but you may have prevented your death by following the appropriate safety procedures. It may not have been the perfect comparison but the point still stands, you must protect yourself even if the dangers are out of your control.[/QUOTE] The difference as is is that if you have your precautions made for the car accident, it doesnt mean someone else will get killed, just like that. But if you make yourself a less "easy" target for rape, a determined rapist will jsut find someone easier.

[QUOTE=.Isak.;50703566]There's a big difference between "hey don't drink alone at a pub with random strangers who you've never talked to, that could be dangerou" and "are you dressing like a whore you slut you deserved it." Precautions? Sure. But saying "R U Asking 4 It" isn't precautionary - it's implying that it's your fault for "asking for it." Going out and playing Pokemon Go at night is stupid, but it wasn't their fault they got robbed, just liked going into a bar half-naked and wasted is stupid, but it isn't your fault if you get raped. The robbers and the rapists - the criminals - are at fault.[/QUOTE] Furthermore, most rapes are done by someone the victim knows. "Don't dress provocatively, because having breasts is the same as flashing around a wad of cash" and "Stick with people you know, don't trust strangers" don't really help that much.

[QUOTE=Alxnotorious;50703037]This is hilarious. I thought the pamphlets were to be interpreted as "Are you asking for consent?" not "Are you dressing to be raped?" Fucked up.[/QUOTE] This. Saw sexual consent course and thought "oh it's good to ask for consent" then it hits you like "oh wait they're saying are you asking to get raped wow" Wow.

Bristol police being out of touch with the youths isn't a "new" thing. I remember quite a few presentations they made at my school and i literally picked holes in them as they were being presented. :v: There was one where they were talking about limewire that was filled with so much misinformation, can't remember all of the presentation per say but it was pretty embarrassing to see.

[QUOTE=Limed00d;50701910]on the substances they consume[/QUOTE] Alcohol does fucked up things to a lot of people, so pretending that it is not a contributing factor is hardly the way to go about things. Yes, rapists are the core of the problem; but there can be contributing factors and there are ways to mitigate risks of such an event.

This is wrong on a lot of levels, but there is a valid message buried deep here. Nobody wants to be told they're partly at fault for horrible shit done to them. Knowing many women who were raped, a lot of them, while DEFINITELY not deserving of it, did setup basically the perfect storm for things to go down that way. Basic things you should not do: 1) Get blackout drunk 2) Have irresponsible friends that blackout too or simply don't care about you 3) Go to parties with much older crowds (looking at you 14 year olds) 4) Drink despite knowing you get sexual and often regret your actions I don't think it even matters how you dress, just don't willfully incapacitate yourself in an environment full of strangers with zero backup. The world is not a safe place and people pretending like changing the way you dress will change that is not going to do any good. This disgusting shit happens and will continue to happen so long people don't establish some sort of buddy system and drink within their limits. Again, I'm not trying to victim blame, but it'd be much easier to stop rapists if drunk girls didn't often hand themselves to the creeps in a drunken stupor. Not to mention how ridiculously sexual drunk women can get, probably without even realizing. I've seen girls who will pounce on men while drunk and then blame them for taking advantage of them the next day.. These people shouldn't drink, period. I'm fully aware this sounds like victim blaming, but I've seen this shit happen so many times, far more than women being forced into sex like you'd expect rape to be. A rapist doesn't have to be someone who goes out looking to take advantage of people and then forces themselves on them. They just have to be horny and make a bad decision to sleep with someone who seems to be into it in the moment. This ruins lives on both sides, despite both people often being drunk and making a terrible decision together. That all said, whoever named this leaflet is a fucking moron.

It's never the victim's fault but people do have a duty to take reasonable precautions against bad things happening to them

It's worth noting for those that didn't read the full article that the leaflets are referred to as out of date in the literal sense; they were first printed in 2008 and weren't supposed to be handed out. This is likely the result of a few backwards officers being put in charge of the meeting.

[QUOTE=Mister Sandman;50709774]It's worth noting for those that didn't read the full article that the leaflets are referred to as out of date in the literal sense; they were first printed in 2008 and weren't supposed to be handed out. This is likely the result of a few backwards officers being put in charge of the meeting.[/QUOTE] I mean thats a huge fuck up on the officers part. But being printed in 2008 is still no excuse for that title on the leaflet.

[QUOTE=bunguer;50702508]It's not the victims fault and government authorities, most of all, should defend that - but it's also very important for parents (or people with similar roles) to teach about taking certain precautions. One does not invalidate the other and definitely doesn't mean it's the victims fault - stop with that nonsense. For the same reason you should lock your door, avoid walking dark and dangerous streets at night etc there are certain precautions that people can take that might reduce the chances of something bad happening, such as: Try to walk in groups, avoid getting blackout drunk (especially with people you don't know too well), don't accept random drinks - and yes, while controversial, dressing with less provocative clothes will make you stand out less and avoid getting attention etc Most of these apply to men and people don't give a damn because they know it's valid advice. A drunk, alone, man walking in a dangerous neighborhood with expensive clothes and visible items (e.g. iphone) is much more likely to get mugged. Teaching these things doesn't mean you're blaming the victim, it means you're teaching the ugliness of the world. Ultimately, you can do whatever you want, and it's definitely not your fault, but to imply there isn't absolutely no possible way to reduce the likelihood of something happening is disingenuous and might end up making things worse.[/QUOTE] I concur with this statement. Not being at fault doesn't mean you shouldn't take steps to prevent it. Though the police leaflet was still horribly insensitive and misinformed.