[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;43558967]Most dudes have a very different perception of romance than women seem to have. An idealized male romance novel would be too short to publish, because it'd skip all the weird sexual tension and emotional games and go directly from the delicious meaty dinner to the bedroom.[/QUOTE]
This is like prime self stereotyping. This discludes guys who don't put sex on the top of their to do list or asexuals.
[QUOTE=Swilly;43560398]This is like prime self stereotyping. This discludes guys who don't put sex on the top of their to do list or asexuals.[/QUOTE]
A romance novel for asexuals would be either the funniest or dullest book in existence
[QUOTE=raptorkid;43560439]A romance novel for asexuals would be either the funniest or dullest book in existence[/QUOTE]
Depends on whether their romantic tendencies are asexual or just their sexual drive is asexual.
[QUOTE=Appellation;43559905]Guys, serious question: Would you consider a relationship that started with and was sustained by "I'll kill/harm myself if you're not there for me/won't be with me"…well, what would you consider it?[/QUOTE]
no, because that's a blatantly abusive relationship (manipulation is abuse)
Maybe I could bring myself to start dating again. Seeing how strong the reaction is to what happened to me is helping me convince myself that it was a rare and screwed up thing. Thanks :-)
[QUOTE=Zeke129;43559779]If these books paint "success" for girls as being able to get a boy I'd argue that they're a far worse influence on girls than boys[/QUOTE]
But when a boy gets the girl it's misogynist because she's a prize
When a girl gets the boy it's misogynist because I'm a feminist and feminism says women always have it worse.
[editline]16th January 2014[/editline]
[QUOTE=Swilly;43560468]Depends on whether their romantic tendencies are asexual or just their sexual drive is asexual.[/QUOTE]
When did sexuality become this D&D character sheet crap.
[editline]16th January 2014[/editline]
Just shag men or women or both or eat more spinach I mean damn
[QUOTE=lazyguy;43563346]But when a boy gets the girl it's misogynist because she's a prize
When a girl gets the boy it's misogynist because I'm a feminist and feminism says women always have it worse.
[editline]16th January 2014[/editline]
When did sexuality become this D&D character sheet crap.
[editline]16th January 2014[/editline]
Just shag men or women or both or eat more spinach I mean damn[/QUOTE]
Romantic attraction is pretty widely considered to be separate from sexual attraction, though obviously they're pretty fucking close.
Why is it weird that someone not interested in sex can still want to be romantically involved with someone?
There's a catch to this concept.
Story is about an attractively fit girl who falls for a fat, although otherwise decent, guy? That's telling boys no matter what they look like they have the right to expect an attractive girl to like them. That's telling girls they should not judge by looks.
Meanwhile, guys are watching porn filled with hot chicks who just love anal and facials(not neccesarily in that order) and no fat chicks are to be found...unless you're specifically into that and seek it out in which case I'm not going to judge you.
Let the girls have their own fantasy guys I say! In the end everyone will be equally unhappy so it's all good.
[QUOTE=cecilbdemodded;43563523]
Meanwhile, guys are watching porn filled with hot chicks
[/QUOTE]
last time I checked the general consensus on porn here was "ugh you can see the genital warts and shit" and "don't go above 360p" judging from
[url]http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1347651[/url]
On male romance authors, John Green, sort of. Half the novel's are as much existential crises as romance novels though. Not sure how well he fits this though, as his only female protagonist dates a guy with one leg...
[QUOTE=slamex;43558670]I don't know that many guys who read romantic fiction though...[/QUOTE]
One time I lent my friend eclipse, and he did not like it.
I still find it mind-boggling that a middle-aged woman's necrophilic and zoophilic wet dreams became so popular.
[QUOTE=Appellation;43559224]Prediction: This thread starts going mod max's way and stretches on page after page until it dies a natural, slow and agonizing, death; or it goes in a direction he doesn't approve of "thread locked. Reason: Crap thread"[/QUOTE]
it's a pretty shit thread anyways. should have been locked already
[editline]17th January 2014[/editline]
[QUOTE=Cuon Alpinus;43563881]I still find it mind-boggling that a middle-aged woman's necrophilic and zoophilic wet dreams became so popular.[/QUOTE]
a lot of people seem to love reading the absolute worst shit they can find. as long as it's popular
50 shades of grey, twilight and the list goes on for a while
[editline]17th January 2014[/editline]
look at me, i'm reading this popular book. isn't that cool?
[QUOTE=Cuon Alpinus;43563881]I still find it mind-boggling that a middle-aged woman's necrophilic and zoophilic wet dreams became so popular.[/QUOTE]
It's pretty unfair to associate vampire and werewolf fetishism with necro and zooo phillia; unless they're into sex with a werewolf whilst it is in wolf form, or the vampire looks like a rotting corpse.
Otherwise they're just an extension of regular old human sex appeal.
[QUOTE=.Lain;43563901]it's a pretty shit thread anyways. should have been locked already
[editline]17th January 2014[/editline]
a lot of people seem to love reading the absolute worst shit they can find. as long as it's popular
50 shades of grey, twilight and the list goes on for a while
[editline]17th January 2014[/editline]
look at me, i'm reading this popular book. isn't that cool?[/QUOTE]
That doesn't explain why it becomes popular in the first place.
[QUOTE=Sgt-NiallR;43563926]It's pretty unfair to associate vampire and werewolf fetishism with necro and zooo phillia; unless they're into sex with a werewolf whilst it is in wolf form, or the vampire looks like a rotting corpse.
Otherwise they're just an extension of regular old human sex appeal.[/QUOTE]
yeah it's unfair as a comparison considering vampires and werewolves aren't real
[editline]17th January 2014[/editline]
[QUOTE=Aidan_088;43563948]That doesn't explain why it becomes popular in the first place.[/QUOTE]
advertisement
[QUOTE=lintz;43558674](ps it's not targeted at boys you pieces of shit)[/QUOTE]
this guy is getting dumbs but he's 100% right
this type of media is targeted at girls who, most of the time, identify with the protagonists. if you look at the equivalent of that type of book for dudes, you'll see a lot of them have nerdy and average looking protagonists that end up in relationships with beautiful, intelligent and successful women
[QUOTE=Zukriuchen;43564142]this guy is getting dumbs but he's 100% right
this type of media is targeted at girls who, most of the time, identify with the protagonists. if you look at the equivalent of that type of book for dudes, you'll see a lot of them nerdy and average looking protagonists that end up in relationships with beautiful, intelligent and successful women[/QUOTE]
while aimed at women (and has a far more severe effect on them), it still effects boys. the kind of men that the women end up with on those books sets a standard of sorts that rl boys may feel they have to live up to. and of course, vice versa with books for boys.
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;43559081][I]Marco patted his belly and leaned back in his chair, content. The entire roasted chicken he'd just consumed sat in his gut, still radiating warmth through his core. He smiled. "Thank you for dinner, Julia. That was great."
Julia tore open her blouse and hiked up her skirt, indicating that it was Banging Time. Marco rang the Sex Gong and went to work.[/I][/QUOTE]
Write a book already, come on. I've been waiting years for this, BDA.
[QUOTE=ForgottenKane;43564275]Write a book already, come on. I've been waiting years for this, BDA.[/QUOTE]
Better, record yourself reading a book, BDA.
GEORGE RR MARTIN presents
GAME OF THRONES: THE AUDIOBOOK: BIG DUMB AMERICAN EDITION
[QUOTE=slamex;43558670]I don't know that many guys who read romantic fiction though...[/QUOTE]
To be quite honest I thoroughly enjoyed The Host (Movie I hear was shit though)
[QUOTE=Grasp;43564392]Better, record yourself reading a book, BDA.
GEORGE RR MARTIN presents
GAME OF THRONES: THE AUDIOBOOK: BIG DUMB AMERICAN EDITION[/QUOTE]
Hasn't BDA got a pretty cool voice too? I'm sure he posted in a thread before.
The book would be totally amazing, and so would the audiobook.
When dealing with growing children, whatever media they consume needs to be prefaced and followed up with the reminder that it's "fantasy", that it's "not how it really is in real life," that "people don't act that way," et cetera. Otherwise, children are going to internalize the values shown. And it affects both genders, regardless of which the media is being consumed by.
When girls read these unrealistic fantasy novels like Twilight and such, they're unconsciously learning some harmful subtext about who they should aspire to be and how others should be. This affects how they present themselves, how they feel about themselves, and how they view others. And it affects boys too, because girls are going to project what they feel the ideal boy should be based on what they learned in the media they've seen.
Not every boy/girl is going to grow up and be lean, muscular/developed or well endowed in whatever body part they think counts. Not every boy/girl is going to grow up to be courageous, sexy, an excessive panderer to their partner's every whim, rich and successful, or a funny person 24/7. People are human - they have flaws, they're not perfect, and not everyone's a perfect 10 out of 10. And today's media, from romance novels to TV shows to even porn (which Don Jon, a movie I still need to see, apparently hits the nail on the head with) give both genders unrealistic expectations about others and make them feel inadequate about themselves, and if there's no parent, guardian, or teacher to let them know the world isn't picture perfect they're going to have problems when they grow up and have relationships.
Hell, it's fucked me over. I still feel that, since I'm not some hunk with muscles, a tall, lean guy who's got bravado and a suave personality, or a gregarious outgoing man, that I'm never going to be loved, regardless of how much I try to rationalize my way out of that worldview. And all my life I've been too shy to make myself available to the opposite sex because I feel unworthy, that I'm not up to their standards. While I'm not trying to blame my shortcomings on an external cause, I do feel that it's mostly due to the idea that when I was young people I gathered from the shows I watched and the way my peers treated me that, since I wasn't athletic and since I was a bookworm, I was unwanted. I know most people probably don't feel that way, but I've met a lot of guys in the same boat as me.
Male power fantasy my ass, it's torture to feel that if I want to succeed in life I need to be something I'm not, to change my face, my body, and my personality to conform to some unrealistic expectation. And we're all undoubtedly aware that's what women feel like too. That they need to be sexy, busty, lean, fit and curvy, and when they can't be that for whatever reason they feel unwanted too.
It's ironic that all those media watchdogs that are nearly unanimously hated for their attempts to censor works deemed unhealthy for children had a point, muddled by their stupid way of addressing it. We do need to be careful about what our children read, watch, listen to, and play. But we shouldn't hide it from them in most cases, we just need to let them know that it's fantasy. It's not how the world works. Because otherwise we're just going to raise some seriously fucked up people.
I think the most important part is education.
I don't think we should monitor those books or games or movies in such a way that we are censuring the medium because we are afraid of offending someone - in my opinion this type of protection could even cause more issues than it solves, since real life is not exactly always fair and perfect, I think it's better to teach ways to deal with certain situations.
Let people read what they want but educate them to know by themselves what's good and bad, what can they expect and what they shouldn't expect.
[QUOTE=Cuon Alpinus;43563881]I still find it mind-boggling that a middle-aged woman's necrophilic and zoophilic wet dreams became so popular.[/QUOTE]
vampires have always been fetishistic and werewolves are depicted as ripped hunks so its pretty understandable
[QUOTE=Appellation;43559905]Feel free to ignore, probably off topic
[Sp]Guys, serious question: Would you consider a relationship that started with and was sustained by "I'll kill/harm myself if you're not there for me/won't be with me"…well, what would you consider it?[/sp][/QUOTE]
NO. god no.
If someone was behaving like that, I would try to get them somewhere they could get help, and then eject as fast as fucking possible.
[editline]16th January 2014[/editline]
[QUOTE=cecilbdemodded;43563523]There's a catch to this concept.
Story is about an attractively fit girl who falls for a fat, although otherwise decent, guy? That's telling boys no matter what they look like they have the right to expect an attractive girl to like them. That's telling girls they should not judge by looks.
Meanwhile, guys are watching porn filled with hot chicks who just love anal and facials(not neccesarily in that order) and no fat chicks are to be found...unless you're specifically into that and seek it out in which case I'm not going to judge you.
Let the girls have their own fantasy guys I say! In the end everyone will be equally unhappy so it's all good.[/QUOTE]
If we're going to start tackling stupid bullshit in media that "hurts women", we might as well go full circle and try to stop stuff that "hurts men"
[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;43560010]
[QUOTE=Appellation;43559905]Feel free to ignore, probably off topic
[Sp]Guys, serious question: Would you consider a relationship that started with and was sustained by "I'll kill/harm myself if you're not there for me/won't be with me"…well, what would you consider it?[/sp][/QUOTE]
No.
[B]No.[/B]
[I]No.[/I]
[U]No.[/U]
Flee. Do not engage.
!!EJECT!![/QUOTE]
[IMG]http://s29.postimg.org/ux5gkjh3p/giphy.gif[/IMG]
I'd bail out so fast I would end up breaking the sound barrier, while calling the cops to warn them about a sucidial person.
I had a thought about something somewhat related recently.
I've always wondered why girls are always into watching cheesy formulaic rom-coms. And then it hit me, it's for the same reason guys like to watch cheesy formulaic action movies. Both genders have a specific fantasy they like to entertain- Girls wanna meet the hottie who will sweep them off their feet and do everything for them, guys want to be the confident hero that people look up to who always gets the girl. So, maybe it's not so much of a stretch for people to have their guilty pleasures.
[QUOTE=Cuon Alpinus;43563881]I still find it mind-boggling that a middle-aged woman's necrophilic and zoophilic wet dreams became so popular.[/QUOTE]
They don't even capitalise on the idea of werewolf romance. You'd think when the only interesting quality is that they can turn into a man-wolf, [I]they'd fucking take advantage of it![/I]
[QUOTE=Sableye;43558910]the problem is there is too much crap out there, like hunger games and twilight right now
i mean substance wise these books are just crap and conflicting crap too. most of these romance books always show the main character being just bad at everything and everybody else is just as bad, yet things work out somehow. i mean hunger games just makes no sense at all, also i dare you to find a romance author that is a guy, because there aren't many. the only good romances ive read are in books like forgotten realms where it can't be crap because it has to fit in with the universe[/QUOTE]
Have you even read the Hunger Games?
A big part of the "romance" thing is that it's all faked so that they can get support from sponsors.
It was only in the sequels that it turned into a "proper" romance (but the sequels are terrible anyway)
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