• Bisexual: A Label With Layers; Tom Daley Comes Out as Bisexual, Igniting L.G.B.T. Debate
    117 replies, posted
As a bisexual, it sucks that this "bi erasure" (hey look, a tumblr term I actually agree with!) is a thing. People need to set others into individual groups, and some are just coming to terms with gay being an option. I suppose us bisexuals have it a little easier than other non-heteros, but only a little. [QUOTE=codemaster85;43458747]when i came out bi to my mom she actually said you cant pick both teams. made me laugh out loud and said okay and after a while she was like meh about it and didnt treat me differently at all.[/QUOTE] I feel this is what my dad would do; not really understand my sexuality, but not hate me for it. It's situations like this that make me not want to come out to my parents at all. Doesn't help that my mother would outright hate me for being something not hetero. [QUOTE=Paige;43458723]I'm really happy this was the first post in the thread. Really sets the tone. Reminds me FP can be good sometimes.[/QUOTE] That this place can; sexuality is probably one of the easier topics to talk about here, because threads about sexuality are going to derail to attack tumblr lqbt+ freaks than the people who are actually lqbt+. (also as a sidenote I have a friend named Paige who loves Sylveon, so that's a little weird)
[QUOTE=Oizen;43458013]Reminds me when my cousin "announced his homosexuality" Almost no one in the room cared, or already they already kinda knew. Then he got mad at everyone. I think a lot of the drama here stems from people loving playing the victim so much and the attention it gets them. I honestly think most people on the planet don't give a shit what gender you fuck.[/QUOTE] Wait isn't the majority of the earths population focused in Asia and Africa. I'm sure a good portion of those people (or their governments at least,) wouldn't mind setting anybody who's lgbt on fire. It's pretty fucking depressing and scary actually.
As much as it'd make sense to drop labels, it'll never happen. People like being able to put a label to themselves and so even though all logic points to sexuality being a scale rather than a few choices you'll always have people gravitating towards certain terms. How many people have you seen on FP ask "what does this make me?", "Am I gay?", or other such questions? Just on the first page of this thread we already have one person asking this. It's not that we want to limit us to a few options but we like being able to describe ourselves not only to other people but even to ourselves with a concrete term. In doing so we also feel grouped with others who go by that term. The unfortunate side effect of this is that it also gives hate a form to target rather than it being just an abstract thought.
[QUOTE=Maloof?;43458081]yeah god forbid a flamboyant gay man is acting like that because that's actually his personality right take a look at the range of personality types that woman show (from outrageously flamboyant and loud to quiet and reserved to bold and assertive) and maybe think about whether or not it's possible for men (straight or otherwise) to display that same range[/QUOTE] So what's your point ? I can't dislike someone because that's his personality so it's a-ok regardless ? Some people have a shitty, obnoxious personality. If someone is a snarky little douchebag that likes to act passive-aggressive with everyone, I'm not going to not hate him because that's his personality so that makes it alright. If someone talks with a forced lisp and never shuts the fuck up about getting dicks rammed up his ass, I'm not going to not hate him because "personality" is a sacred ground of no complains or resent allowed. If something is obnoxious, forced and loud, no matter what you call it, it's still going to be obnoxious forced and loud. And this isn't even about heteronormativity or whatever the fuck that means. Because I don't like people acting flamboyant all over the place doesn't mean I think everyone should act the same way. It just means I don't like people acting flamboyant all over the place.
[QUOTE=Ganerumo;43457750]I can't be the only one here that really despises people bragging or never shutting up about their sexuality, right ? There's very few things that annoy me more than someone acting deliberately gay for the sake of being noticed.[/QUOTE] how the fuck do you act gay. straight people can act even more flamboyant then most LGBT people so idk what you're on about.
[QUOTE=Kyle902;43459290]how the fuck do you act gay. straight people can act even more flamboyant then most LGBT people so idk what you're on about.[/QUOTE] Dickwads bragging constantly and never shutting the fuck up about who they are fucking like it's everyone's business and getting all up in arms calling homophobia when you tell them their dick stories doesn't exactly concern everyone so maybe he should stop talking about them 24/7 nonstop just to get attention, because people are still under the impression that talking really loud about being gay in a university environment in 2014 will get people to notice you more. So, essentially, homosexuals who are actually trying to stay in their little world of being special and who are trying their best to look and act in the most flamboyant, obnoxious way possible to show the world that they are indeed gay and deserve a different treatment for it. Being gay isn't a valid fucking reason to be interesting so cut that shit out. The whole over-the-top flamboyant thing is obnoxious as fuck regardless of who does. When it's a guy or a girl doing it with an extra layer of bragging about being homosexual or bisexual, it's even worse.
A video from the Neo-Nazi Enjoy [video=youtube;rVAcDIhOJ0M]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVAcDIhOJ0M[/video] Note: I don't support him.
[QUOTE=Ganerumo;43459325]Dickwads bragging constantly and never shutting the fuck up about who they are fucking like it's everyone's business and getting all up in arms calling homophobia when you tell them their dick stories doesn't exactly concern everyone so maybe he should stop talking about them 24/7 nonstop just to get attention, because people are still under the impression that talking really loud about being gay in a university environment in 2014 will get people to notice you more. So, essentially, homosexuals who are actually trying to stay in their little world of being special and who are trying their best to look and act in the most flamboyant, obnoxious way possible to show the world that they are indeed gay and deserve a different treatment for it. Being gay isn't a valid fucking reason to be interesting so cut that shit out. The whole over-the-top flamboyant thing is obnoxious as fuck regardless of who does. When it's a guy or a girl doing it with an extra layer of bragging about being homosexual or bisexual, it's even worse.[/QUOTE] I know a bunch of non-hetero people and none of them act like that I don't know how many you've run into
[QUOTE=Vodkavia;43459679]You misunderstand what a sliding scale is. You don't buy hot sauce that has a spicey rating of "some variable." You use Mild, medium or extra hot. Straight, bisexual, gay and everything else are approximations, approximations aren't supposed to be constants. They allow people to communicate something that would otherwise be more complicated to explain.[/QUOTE] Oh I understand, I'm just saying that the doing away with and/or not caring about such labels as some people may suggest will not happen.
I remember when this story first came out and everyone instantly latched onto him being gay as opposed to bisexual and I found it really frustrating, so I'm happy for articles like this to bring attention to it. The post that mentions how the last two letter of LGBT are ignored more than the first two is hugely correct, I feel.
[QUOTE=wulfe8857;43457470]The LGBT community forgets about the last two letters of the acronym a lot.[/QUOTE] As a pansexual, where the fuck is our letter? Nah who cares, it's just a letter, and considering I live in a pretty liberal area, I'm glad I don't get shit for my sexuality. Glad to see more public officials come out!
I never got why in the LGBT acronym, Lesbians and Gays are separate letters. I mean aren't they more or less the same thing?
[QUOTE=Ganerumo;43457658]As a Bisexual guy I see a lot of people mixing up being bisexual and being an unfaithful non-trustworthy slut that fucks everything.[/QUOTE] I was once talking to a friend, and mentioned I was bi. She got a really weird look on her face, and then started acting weird. I asked why, and she told me she thought that that meant that I just wanted to fuck everything and that I would be unfaithful to whoever I dated because all I care about is going to the bone-zone. Is that really the perception a lot of people have about bi and pans people? Because holy shit that's dumb.
[QUOTE=wulfe8857;43457789]LGBT is the shorthand version of the full thing which is more like LGTBQAPIH. I think there's a few more that I'm forgetting.[/QUOTE] We should just change it to GSM (gender & sexuality minorities).
[QUOTE=T-Sonar.0;43460773]We should just change it to GSM (gender & sexuality minorities).[/QUOTE] Nope because [I]minority[/I] holds all kinds of pretexts like "not the norm" which is wholly counterproductive
[QUOTE=Oizen;43458013]Reminds me when my cousin "announced his homosexuality" Almost no one in the room cared, or already they already kinda knew. Then he got mad at everyone. I think a lot of the drama here stems from people loving playing the victim so much and the attention it gets them. I honestly think most people on the planet don't give a shit what gender you fuck.[/QUOTE] Probably because he built it up to be a massive thing, only to have the people he cares about say "meh" Obviously ambivalence is much better than a negative response, but it's hardly great.
[QUOTE=Sgt-NiallR;43461105]Probably because he built it up to be a massive thing, only to have the people he cares about say "meh" Obviously ambivalence is much better than a negative response, but it's hardly great.[/QUOTE] Why? In a perfect world you could be whatever orientation you want and no one would give a fuck.
ive seen gays and lesbians be some of the most hateful towards the B and T because they dont think it "real" or "full" enough. bisexuals have even less representation than trans people do so im glad this dude came out, more people like him will help normalize being bi like coming out gay did 10-20 years ago
[QUOTE=Ganerumo;43457658]As a Bisexual guy I see a lot of people mixing up being bisexual and being an unfaithful non-trustworthy slut that fucks everything.[/QUOTE] I feel kinda bad that I'm probably the kind of bisexual that perpetuates that stereotype :v: In my defense I've always been very self-conscious and lonely, so meeting up and having sex with random people I had no interest in relationships with was a way for me to feel popular and attractive instead of like a loser virgin. [QUOTE=glitchvid;43457896]I think pansexuality has some pretty important tones to it, considering Bisexual means you're ok with both genders/sexes and pan sexual means just about everything. But to be technical, I think most Bi people are really pansexual, or at least from my experience they are.[/QUOTE] I'd say I technically fit the definition of a pansexual more than a bisexual. This considering I first and foremost don't differentiate my attraction with men and women from trans, I like both men and women so why shouldn't I like something that is part of both? Other than that I can feel attracted to anything regardless of gender, age, species and blood ties, but I still limit myself to never fuck anything that can't give me consent. If the synonym "Omnisexual" was more commonly known rather than "Pansexual", I would probably use that to refer to myself since I feel it describes my sexuality much better. However as of now I don't feel pansexual really has a name that makes it obvious what it's about (Omni = everything, Pan = Greek goat god and kitchen accessory). More often than not it just confuses people, so I prefer to call myself a bisexual since it's a more recognizable and logical term that gets the same message through without as many follow-up questions.
[QUOTE=Irespawnoften;43461194]Why? In a perfect world you could be whatever orientation you want and no one would give a fuck.[/QUOTE] Obviously, but in that same world one wouldn't stress oneself out about coming out. The "correct" response would be one of support and happiness, even if you already knew the person was gay/bi. Dismissing it out of hand, especially when it's so obviously important to them, is a dick move. It says "you know those worries you had? They're stupid." instead of "I'm happy that you're confident enough to tell us."
[QUOTE=demoguy08;43461055]Nope because [I]minority[/I] holds all kinds of pretexts like "not the norm" which is wholly counterproductive[/QUOTE] What the hell are you on about?! Is English your second language or something? Minority does not mean that AT ALL. I mean the explanation of the word is literally contained within it. 'Minor'. As in, y'know, one of the smaller subsets of a population. Homosexuality DOES fall into that category. A lesser portion of the population is homosexual than heterosexual.
I personally blame Dan Savage a little. He's one of the "Big Voices" of the LGBT and his opinion on Bisexuals is less than stellar.
[QUOTE=Sgt-NiallR;43461105]Probably because he built it up to be a massive thing, only to have the people he cares about say "meh" Obviously ambivalence is much better than a negative response, but it's hardly great.[/QUOTE] Seems like a silly thing to get mad over though. I had the same response upon my own coming out. It was such a relief.
[QUOTE=Paul McCartney;43461566]I personally blame Dan Savage a little. He's one of the "Big Voices" of the LGBT and his opinion on Bisexuals is less than stellar.[/QUOTE] dan savage is literally a terrible person the shit he says about bi and trans people is fuckin sickening
Trans people have it worse then the other 3 letters in the LGBT community generally which sucks.
personally i find few things more disgusting than GSM's beating on other GSM's. especially for such stupid shit like 'they're greedy!' that's one of the most idiotic things ever
[QUOTE=Lord of Ears;43461654]dan savage is literally a terrible person the shit he says about bi and trans people is fuckin sickening[/QUOTE] I'm interested in what you're saying, but I can't seem to find anything on this. What has Dan Savage said about bi and trans?
[QUOTE=wulfe8857;43462051]I'm interested in what you're saying, but I can't seem to find anything on this. What has Dan Savage said about bi and trans?[/QUOTE] [quote]The tranny activists are going to jump down my throat for this, but... it seems to me that your ex could've put off the sex change until after his son was out of high school.[/quote] [quote]Perhaps I'm a transphobic bigot, but I honestly think waiting a measly 36 months to cut your dick is a sacrifice any father should be willing to make for his 15-year-old son. Call me old-fashioned.[/quote] [URL="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=13054"]source[/URL]
'call me old-fashioned' what a stupid thing to say, how can you not think ''wait, 'call me old fashioned' is one of the excuses people have used for keeping gays down for a thousand years''
[QUOTE=WeekendWarrior;43462083][URL="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=13054"]source[/URL][/QUOTE] [quote]Unfortunately, your ex wasn't willing to make that sacrifice (selfish tranny!), or it never occurred to him to make that sacrifice (stupid tranny!).[/quote]
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