Maryland bill would protect right to bear Pop Tarts - Polidicks

On a more serious note, I actually got suspended for five days in third grade because I made the gun shape with my hand and pointed it at one of my friends (someone saw me and reported me). The amount of bullshit on that day was immense.

[QUOTE=Death_God;39880609]i eat cereal and its nice[/QUOTE] Sicko

Pop tarts are not a crime. They are a lifestyle and if you take them away, all hell will break loose!

The only thing stopping a bad guy with a pop tart, is a good guy with a pop tart.

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;39880313]There's no correlation between children having Pop Tarts and how often they're robbed. No studies have been able to conclusively prove that introducing or removing Pop Tarts from an environment has any notable effect on the levels of crime in that area.[/QUOTE] What about when Australia introduced a mandatory poptart buyback program? There hasn't been a single poptart massacre since. Who really needs poptarts when you can just buy a toaster strudel anyway? Aside from poptart collectors there's no reason to own them.

More stupid news from the state I live in...

[QUOTE=Killerelf12;39880523]I can't tell what posts of this thread are jokes or semi-serious debates, it's hard to take anyone seriously with all this talk of Pop Tarts...[/QUOTE] Pop-Tart legislature is no joke. We're serious here. If Pop-Tarts are banned, how are we to defend our stomachs? I prefer a smaller, more concealed snack rather than something as large as a Lunchable (too troublesome in a crisis needing quick action).

[QUOTE=Zeke129;39881252]What about when Australia introduced a mandatory poptart buyback program? There hasn't been a single poptart massacre since. Who really needs poptarts when you can just buy a toaster strudel anyway? Aside from poptart collectors there's no reason to own them.[/QUOTE] It's absolutely fucking ridiculous. Toaster strudels end up being healthier in the long run anyway. You could argue that poptarts don't have a hot filling that could potentially end up killing the children but the protection and safety triggers on the toaster strudels are there to prevent that type of shit.

Sometimes I just feel like saying "Fuck it" I've thought about putting a pop tart in my mouth, But i just don't have the balls to actually do it

People should be able to freely own poptarts, but we should also be keeping a record on their previous meals, and check that record before we let them have poptarts. People who have a history of nutritional health problems should not have poptarts.

I buy Pop Tarts because they're fucking tasty and this is America so I'll have it my way

High capacity jelly pop tarts need to be banned, think of the children's teeth!

This is the wrong thread to read while hungry and living across the street from a store that sells pop tarts.

I really don't see the problem with pop-tarts as long as you are buying them in packs of at most 12, seriously there is NO NEED for packs of 36 idiots. [img]http://puu.sh/2gb3I[/img] there is seriously no logical need to have that many pop-tarts at one time

[QUOTE=Shadaez;39881914]I really don't see the problem with pop-tarts as long as you are buying them in packs of at most 12, seriously there is NO NEED for packs of 36 idiots. [img]http://puu.sh/2gb3I[/img] there is seriously no logical need to have that many pop-tarts at one time[/QUOTE] It takes two seconds to swap pop-tart box. The capacity of the individual boxes doesn't matter if you're going on a mass-eating.

They can take away our poptarts but believe me 1776 will commence again if they try to take our Pepsi Cola.

[QUOTE=faze;39881258]More stupid news from the state I live in...[/QUOTE] This is a bill to prevent stupidity.

They should ban poptarts, in the UK we dont have them and there is very few poptart related deaths, even the majority of our police dont use poptarts

We need to ban frosting shrouds. You know those molar things that go cavity

the statistics point towards donuts being a greater risk than pop tarts anyways. why the hell is no one talking about this?

[QUOTE=yawmwen;39882061]the statistics point towards donuts being a greater risk than pop tarts anyways. why the hell is no one talking about this?[/QUOTE] It's just the Big Donut corporate lobbyists stirring up drama to distract us from more important issues.

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/seDkXr2.jpg[/IMG] I broke down and bought them.

I think it is about time this receives an update. [t]http://i.imgur.com/ot9jM7Q.jpg[/t]

I can't believe this kid got suspended for this. Just because there were a few mass flavor blastings doesn't mean every pop-tart owner is a crook.

[QUOTE=The First 11'er;39881346]It's absolutely fucking ridiculous. Toaster strudels end up being healthier in the long run anyway. You could argue that poptarts don't have a hot filling that could potentially end up killing the children but the protection and safety triggers on the toaster strudels are there to prevent that type of shit.[/QUOTE] Poptarts don't need to have a hot filling, but heating them up is common. This makes them inherently dangerous - you never know when you'll bite into one and get burned. With toaster strudels you KNOW they'll be hot, so they're safer for everyone. Where the hell did this metaphor go

[QUOTE=smurfy;39879831]In the UK no one has Pop Tarts and guess what, far fewer children get suspended from school. Only the police should be allowed to have Pop Tarts[/QUOTE] Mate, my dad's a Bobby. In 1993 he lost his best friend and co-worker to a man with a donut. A passerby was able to wrestle the man down, but it was to late. If that passerby had a Pop-Tart, maybe my dad's friend could have lived.

lol over here my brother was an idiot (he was 10 at a the time) and took a bb gun to school and shot a girl with it and all that happened was it got taken off him until after school :v:

[QUOTE=Stormcharger;39882546]lol over here my brother was an idiot (he was 10 at a the time) and took a bb gun to school and shot a girl with it and all that happened was it got taken off him until after school :v:[/QUOTE] Who cares about toys? We're discussing serious pop tarts here.

I think we need to ban high-capacity assault toasters.

[QUOTE=Judas;39882755]I think we need to ban high-capacity assault toasters.[/QUOTE] [IMG]http://www.wardscatering.co.uk/images/db/8ATW-131_large.jpg[/IMG] Sickening, isn't it? No one needs that many slots