Games Workshop announces Warhammer 40k book series for kids - Sensationalist Headlines

Pretty sure there were some parts of Gaunts Ghosts and 15 Hours that were shown from a kid's perspective, and when it comes to grimdark 15 Hours was definitely up there.

I mean it's pretty funny that they are trying to do a child friendly version of the most batshit grimderp setting around but i'm left wondering why they would bother? As a kid I was fascinated enough by the setting, the fact it was all grimdark and over the top made it more interesting than star wars or star trek. I can't see a child friendly version having the same appeal, wouldn't it just be really boring even to it's target audience?.

Thanks to this article I saw pcgamer's adblocker request thingy for the first time ever: https://files.facepunch.com/forum/upload/238605/b41d9c6c-abb0-4db8-bbc0-29497b0d378c/image.png They're really using this picture fucking everywhere they can.

You're exactly why we need to teach the children about the cleansing power of flame young.

i cant wait to see how they make slaaneshi anything kid friendly, that'll be a good one

To be fair the older style of Slaanesh that was more like a glam rocker is pretty age nonspecific https://heresyandheroes.files.wordpress.com/2018/01/img_0393.jpg?w=637

More likely they will just omit slaanesh entirely. I don't think these little kid friendly things are going to have to encompass the full scope of the lore, it looks like it's just babies' first grimdark introduction to the setting. Think of it like all of the really child friendly star wars merch out there. Star wars colouring books for toddlers rarely have a page where you have to use your best red and brown crayons to adequately capture the colour of Darth Vader's horrifically burnt and mutilated body on the operating table, after his duel with obi wan.

You know that writing prompt about a class who did a letter exchange with a bunch of space marines? I'm hoping for something just as hilarious as that.

https://i.imgur.com/uZv0L7u.jpg It's so nice to see them get introduced to heretic purging at a young age.

you can't mention this and not post a link

The top comment is absolute gold. https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/2tquzy/wp_due_to_an_address_mixup_an_elementary_school/

I'm hoping for a story where a kid adopts a tyranid cut off from the swarm and keeps it a secret from his family.

I legit miss this part of 40k, back when the game wasn't afraid to be goofy as fuck with shit like this and the Ork punk rockers. Now it feels the game takes itself way to seriously with the only real levity coming from the Orks being cockney goofballs, however the Orks aren't allowed to be punk rockers anymore, that's too silly.

Honestly I don't see how this is any different from that time in the 80s/90s where companies were making toy lines of r-rated movies and marketed them to kids. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qpYMfflioJE

Also both Rambo and Robocop got childrens cartoons despite being hard R films (and in Rambo's case the film was already rather watered down compared to the book).

"Will little Timmy get executed for not praying to Emperor enough? Find out next time Warhammer 40kids!"

Don't forget about Toxic Avenger and Mortal Kombat getting cartoons too

Yeah i think the balance needs to be right. 40k is a fucking absurd setting. While everyone stomping around completely serious and po faced, being bad asses in this bleak universe is part of that- glam rock space marines, goth rocker orks, alien hybrids riding around in gothic limos, and space elves with fashion and hairstyles from the space 80s are just as important to the character of the setting.

Tbh i'm so glad they did this in the 80's 90's. i would never have been allowed to watch some of my childhood favourite movies, like robocop and alien, if i hadn't already gotten the action figures for my birthday. For some reason that just convinced my mum that those movies were suitable for me when i was 5 or 6 despite their classification lmao. If warhammer for babies has the same effect and gets more people into the hobby then fair play to GW, but i still think fullbright 40k sounds boring as fuck.

https://i.imgur.com/7pPIO5k.png absolutely disgraceful

hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngh i have a buddy in my gaming group that plays Ultramarines he's an only child the irony is not lost on the rest of us

Is there nothing safe from the insidious influence of our spiritual liege

will that make the dark eldar a metaphor for stranger danger?

On a positive note, maybe now that it's being peddled to kids there'll be no end to the "Rowboat Girlyman" memes. Gentlemen: We shall groom our children to bully the Ultramarines to death.

Come on, there are better Chapters that can be used for a kids book. Like the Salamanders especially would be good because they're basically the nicest of the classic chapters. They're not secretive and underhanded but well-meaning like the Dark Angels, or egotistical jackoffs like the Ultramarines, or prone to bouts of psychotic blood orgies like the Blood Angels.

Dude Rampant Gilligan is the first Primarch to return, of course they're gonna jerk off our boys in blue

and even if Rwandan Genocide hadn't come back, the Smurfs would still be up front and center, always anyone wishing otherwise should've learned by now that hope is the first step

Space Mariens aren't religious zealots though. Well, the Black Templars are but they're that weird kid who's way too excited when your history class talks about the crusades. But anyways, idk why people keep saying they'd have to leave out Slaanesh. Slaanesh is just a god of excess, people are just lazy and always equate this to sex when it could easily just be used to justify an obsession with perfection or greed, both things that would easily fit in a kid's novel.

The Imperium is not exactly a bastion of alternate-religious tolerance, and Space Marines are pretty much the epitome of that. If you as an Imperial citizen were to express any religious faith other than devout reverence for the Emperor, you'd be in serious danger of having your shit kicked in by the local Guard, and the Astartes are even more fervent in the cause. Like, they may not be reciting scripture 24/7, but if you stray from the Imperial faith they will put a bolt through your skull. If that isn't religious zealotry I don't know what is. To get to the larger point, there really isn't much in the way of 'good guys' in the 40k universe, and it really is twisting the setting to portray any political or military body of the Imperium as heroes. I will say you've got a solid point about Slaanesh though, in general I'd say people depict the most prominent/straightforward aspects of the Chaos gods when there are more interesting nuances to them. Slaanesh is about perfection and greed as you said, Nurgle could be about obsessive tendencies and conservatism, Tzeentch personified by mercurial behavior, and Khorne embodied through honor and Darwinian struggle. Those are all things that might be a bit more kid-friendly than sex, plagues, horrific transformation, and murderdeathragecarnage respectively.

Marines do what they do more out of a duty than religion, which is why chapters like are notable for being zealots. But anyways, heroes in 40k have always been relative, especially when one side is either guardsmen or warrior monks vs. Chaos flaying people alive to summon literal demons feeding off of pain and torment.