The Sex Recession - AKA Millenials should be having more sex
297 replies, posted
oh I know, I'm just like you, but the fact is this is the dating situation right now, engaging in it means following its rules or making sure all opportunities fail
and for someone like me whose day to day life is devoid of people, let alone girls, means dating is the only way I can meet someone of the opposite sex
Kinda sucks when you're in one of those existential situations where all you can do is silently shake your fist and bite the bullet, especially if meeting a girl is truly important to you.
It wouldn't matter if I was surrounded by people who chatted me up, looked for me and genuinely enjoyed my presence and personality. I have a couple but they live far away.
I'm just tired of spending my youth within my four walls, at a computer. I want more out of life than videogames and music even though they are my biggest passions, yet ever since I moved to Milan the people around me have been unable to provide a sense of belonging and partnership, whatever the reasons may be
I mean I’ve had something like 10 girlfriends few of em quite serious and hooked up with a few other girls. Mostly successful, only been really rejected couple times.
I’m no ‘Master-Chad’ trying pick up all the bitches at the club. I find people who I’m attracted to but interesting people. Not just any damn hoe that walks by. I also find Tinder a waste of space, the type of girls that use Tinder are mostly generic sorority type girls.
I tend to meet people at house parties, artsy events,open mic bars , concerts, it seems like this is where I find the type of people I’m into.
To be honest though going into dates, I never feel pressured to be anything. I just enjoy people’s company and like making people laugh. I’ve been told I’m very weird and awkward, but charming. So maybe I’m speaking from a privileged place, personality-wise.
You may quite possibly be a seriously charismatic dude.
Its a Non-European thing I've found in the case of 1st World Countries.
Europe seems to have its head screwed in place for the most part with gender dynamics(to a point, we've both spoken about similiar negative experiences about other topics).
In the US though, holy fuck. There are plenty of level headed girls, those level headed girls aren't dating.
Can’t get that way if your don’t practice it.
you guys think dating is hard, try being an ugly girl with a dick
I'd just like to point out that, unless I'm mixing people up, you're talking to someone who not too long ago made a goddamn bar graph of the age range of his Tinder matches so that should clear a thing or two up.
When you're not good-looking, your chances aren't exactly "in your favor".
Agreed. I was horribley socially awkward, shy, and bullied throughout elementary school and middle school.
Then when I started highschool I decided I would talk to people more. Not even kidding I basically taught my self how to make people laugh by copying comedian’s jokes when I was starting to make myself more social.
I distinctly remember reciting a Russel Peters joke when I was 14. I would try and tell it like how he told it. Seems fake as fuck, but it gave me the confidence to talk to people and learn how to tell stories.
I have a feeling that a lot of folks on the internet who had to learn socialization did it by taking the path of Pagliaccio, and I know I did. I'm not very happy inside, I'm very self-conscious, and being honest around other people makes me exhausted. To cope with that, I seek people's affection by being cheerful and funny. I joke, I self-deprecate, I fake-laugh at other people's jokes and desperately hope they're not doing the same for me. It's not all that hard to keep up, but it's not going to do me any favors much later on.
yeah it will
You won't get better, or be more equipped to be comfortable in those situations without exposing yourself to them, it will pay off in the end.
I'm getting incel incubation chamber vibes
Yeah, no shit. Just have some confidence, fake or otherwise, and put a small amount of effort into looking around every day. Stop making a potential SO your end goal or your only goal and just live life.
so your only impression from reading 8 pages of posts here is "incel incubation chamber"?
I believe I fall into the millennial bracket ('92), and this phenomenon was unknown to me. Once I graduated high school, during which I had my first experiences/girlfriends, I went full ham and spent nearly 3 years online dating. I met some amazing women, almost all of which were my age, some of whom I dated, most of which I just hooked up with. I found that provided I made my intentions very clear when taking a girl out, things went really well, and I'm not exactly the most attractive guy in the world either.
When I was in elementary and middle school I was bullied a lot for my looks and clothes since I was rather poor, but things turned around in high school as I aged and found my confidence. I feel like that played a role in why I wanted to hook up with women as much as I did, and why I put so much effort into it. I'm fortunate that I've had a great career which allowed me the time and money to date, which I imagine is the #1 problem for most other millennials. I never went to college and began my career at 17. Luck plays a huge role.
It's one of several impressions.
In my case it's either too wrapped up in my job to pay off any bills, too wrapped up in my hobbies and jacking the bill higher because I can be a shill, or too wrapped up in my .01% criteria of "the perfect woman" to give anyone a chance. You know those moments in a multiplayer game when you create a specific fighting setting to look for in a match and nothing shows up so you go "I'll go with any setting to connect to get at least one"? It's like I still give everyone I meet a chance, even to those who may have liked me, I unconsciously go back to "She's cute, but she's not the fit, game touting rich tomboy you always wanted" and the feelings just die and just become friends. It was never like this back in HS, but as the years went by it kind of did with social media being a huge factor and people being more open to ideal women that it became tough to find the one for me, and yet it feels wrong thinking like that.
You should know by the now that just slapping confidence onto an answer and trying to mom/dad people, if you honestly think they're incels, only makes them hide further. Yeah?
I'm meeting a girl, but I feel like I have a hard time truly opening up my grouchy, lonely heart.
Im TOO used to my own company/being in my own bubble. I've got no issues communicating, but when she actually wanted to hold my hand and give me hugs, I felt little actual romance.
I chalk it up to just not being used to someone wanting to show me love; other times I think i'm an unfeeling sociopath.
I suppose the only option is behavioral therapy at this point.
For all the people struggling
Confidence comes from believing you are a competent person. Make some goals, easy goals at first, then accomplish them. Maybe you feel uncomfortable talking to people, so try having conversations with strangers, even if it’s just a hello how are you. Maybe you only have trouble talking to girls, so do the same thing without the intention of getting with them.
Get a therapist if you can, work through your issues. Just don’t give up, because you can be so much more!
i dutch oven my girlfriend and she hasnt left yet, can i get some coine or some shit
Tagging this so when I wake up and see this i'll be reminded to post later since im sleepy as shit. But I do got some heavy stuff to write about my feelings of the "Sex Recession".
There isn’t a way around gradually building up your social skills, confidence, comfort in those situations and everything else without exposing yourself to it and trying over and over again. It’s not easy, I don’t know how else to phrase it though.
yeah man people shouldn't be allowed to vent their frustrations in life in an online forum, how dare they
cool, thanks for bringing negativity into this thread instead of actually saying something constructive and meaningful.
i dunno man this thread is pretty fucken negative already lmao
It's not hard for me to talk to girls (or guys) at all and I generally think I'm interesting enough of a person... but I really hate the amount of commitment that's expected.
Am I crazy for thinking the ideal relationship is a friend you can have sex with and go on trips with? I cannot keep a fucking snapchat streak and call you everyday. I got shit to do. Seems like the relationships have to be "social-media worthy"; so that they can share your awesome dates to fucking Cheesecake Factory. I work minimum wage, work full time, and have hobbies.
Then I have to get bombarded by your emotional baggage and complaining about useless shit. Why deal with that? I got big titty asian chicks at the click of a button.
Is this a trend or am I hooking up with the wrong people?
And it's worse because I could probably get with more girls if I wasn't landlocked at my house and having to Uber everywhere I go. Because picking up chicks in your bike is not ideal.
get a motorbike or moped, that would be sick
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