Family where mum is daddy, dad is mummy and son is raised as gender neutral
75 replies, posted
It's a bit weird, but it looks like the kids has a choice in everything, which seems actually pretty cool. I don't get the issue
The kid calls himself a boy and then the parent corrects him
that seems pretty contrary to his choice.
That kids gunna get bullied like crazy. Good lord.
"I'm wearing arbitrarily male-assigned clothes some days when I feel like it" is not transgender. Nowhere in the article is it mentioned that she's trans, just that she literally prefers to wear different sets of clothes some days. And the
reason she's the "dad" is because the kid decided to refer to her as such.
This is the thing that always bothers me. I don't mind you raising your child to be whoever they want to be, my parents never once forced any ideals on me beyond being the best person i can be, do what you want. This, however, is just forcing your ideals and social/political agenda on a child that has no idea about any on that stuff and inevitably causing them problems during their childhood and further issues leading into adulthood. It's always these kinds of people that you see in the headlines too that give everyone else a bad name and forced a negative opinion on the public. I always point to Gwen Stefani as a prime example of how to do this stuff right, not only is she famous, she minds her own gotdamn business and lets her kids be who they want to be, it's great.
These people are just as shitty as gay-bashing parents or people who make their kids do beauty pageants so they can live vicariously through them.
They're determining an identity, pushing it upon the child, and I am confident punishment follows when the identity is not upheld.
You don't get to decide your child's identity. That's the root issue.
This is the future we chose. Someday everyone will be transsexual.
This is just sad
Let the kid be what he wants to be
Even though these parents are shitbags I think it's also readily apparent that this article was not written from a perspective that I'd personally agree with.
Like, you can just tell that certain people and publications are waiting for any negative article they can write that relates to the LGBT movement in general.
"Family where mum is daddy, dad is mummy" immediately screams "oh also transgender people confuse me and I am angry about it and am taking all measures to discredit their very existence."
We should be very careful to criticize those things that deserve criticism -- as, it seems, these parents do -- while also calling out shitty biases, even if those shitty biases result in a valid argument in this instance.
Trump needs to bring in the draft for this reason
God please help i can't escape the black hole the irony singularity this post created about a draft dodger instituting a draft
Like, to draft the parents? Or the kid? I'm not sure I follow the logic here. Who's getting drafted? Will just a general draft solve this issue? I don't understand.
Without knowing anything about Nikki aside from what's in the article, it sounds like they're gender fluid. At the very least, cross dressing is absolutely a thing and is not mutually exclusive with being trans.
Masculinity and femininity are concepts that are not necessarily tied to gender or sex and it's entirely possible for someone to be an mtf trans person who prefers to be masculine, same as it's entirely fine to be a cisgendered woman who prefers to be masculine or a cisgendered man who prefers to be feminine.
Honestly it's beautiful.
Oh i understand that, i'm sorry if i implied otherwise. I guess it's just an ignorant outsiders perspective, i have trans friends but i don't really know what they go through day-to-day and it's one of those topics where it's hard to ask questions or be knowledgeable or make comments without just looking like another ignorant dick, you know? I dunno, i understand completely how much it can suck to be misrepresented or under represented etc but there's always steps to take to lessen the chances of stuff like that happening or a level of acceptance where you can be upset but not cause a scene. I guess the closest personal experience i can use as an analogy is i've got vitiligo, meaning in short that i've got patches of bright white skin all over my body and i get an awful lot of stupid questions like "is it leprosy/x disease" or "is it contagious" and believe me there's plenty of times i'd want to smack the stupid off the person but i don't. Or like i'm bi but i don't really get upset if someone assumes i'm full gay or full straight even though it can be annoying.
Change doesn't come overnight, i'm 24 and there are exactly three (3) representations of vitiligo in popular media and they're dubious as best in one case and completely ignored in another. It's easy to be frustrated but i dunno, i think you can resolve situations without ending up in the news for causing a scene or stuff like this article. Like i said, i'm on right side of the fence here, people are who they are and it's more about who they are than what they look like, so i'm genuinely sorry if i come across poorly here, just trying to come across better in the future.
No worries, I didn't take offense to your post at all. Gender's just an area that's so large in scope that it can become easy to lose where you are when you're looking at a specific subject like masculinity/feminity.
because that's not politically useful for the parents, now is it?
This isn't disgusting in the slightest. I had/have to stay in the closet solely because if people around me found out i like dicks and vaginas, they would either mock me or disown me for it. Can't bring my boyfriend over because my homophobic dad will most likely bully him or me over it, people at work can't know im dating someone whos male because ill be ridiculed or at worst fired. And I have to grin and bear people calling LGBT peorple basically sub human garbage.
LGBT has always been there, its just now its more accepting than its ever been. Saying its a fad or people's choice makes my piss boil because I spent my entire middle/highschool life fighting over the fear of liking the same sex, just because i was afraid of being bullied or mocked my entire school life.
It's really not. Being LGBT fucking sucks, it's like rolling an RPG character with multiple debuffs right from the start. We celebrate being LGBT because just getting through it takes a lot of effort and we want to feel good about that.
Nobody pretends to be LGBT if they actually aren't, because doing that would be really, really dumb. It's not a choice, it's something forced on you at birth, and we might as well do our best to have some fun with it.
Being an anti LGBT reactionnary has become a fucking trend
If anything I think its sad that LGBT people think being LGBT sucks. It doesnt and I dont think its something people should act as if, if you are gay, trans, or anything you are at a disadvantage. Because that's the exact idea that gets in your head and makes you play victim (I mean you as in anyone not you specifically, for clarification)
If you ask me, I think being LGBT gives advantages over people who are raised to be straight and live 'straight' - you have the ability to do things that some people would never ever consider. While you may get insulted by assholes saying youre 'gay' or whatever, you'll also get positive attention from people for being bold and somewhat ideosyncratic/quirky. Doing things that other people would never do is a very admirable quality, but only if you wear it.
I'm not going to bs anybody and say LGBT were never oppressed, but seriously having this in your head pre-disposes you to being a victim in most circumstances. Hope someone here gets something out of this post because I really don't like posting in these threads, they just absolutely suck I can't even begin to explain how frustrating it is that every single time 'trans' is in the title of a thread, there is huge traffic and a dumpster fire
the way I look at it is that it sucks, but it's also something to be proud of. if that makes sense.
I think you are totally right - I think that its important to know some minorities need some assistance in certain situations, but also with the awareness that pretty much everyone in the world who wasnt raised in a family of wealth, probably has circumstances in their life where they are the oppressed ones, they are the minority, and while some people and some demographics are effected more than others or just in more situations, I just dislike how it leaks outside of the circumstances that engage them
I dont intend for people to forge happiness and fake a smile or anything, but I think focusing energy on the positive qualities where you can is so so important because it makes the hard times you have to deal with a bit nicer, knowing that outside of those specific circumstances, things arent really bad at all.
Some environments do make things harder as well, if you're ever able to find a path to break out to freedom, that gives you a goal to achieve in life and already having an aspiration such as going to change your gender, gives you something to do around a time where most people even without issues involving sexuality or gender have no idea what theyre doing on the planet and feel lost. My point here specifically is that having a drive is an extremely good quality; but that drive is determined by your attitude.
Attitude can be anywhere between 'im going to haul ass and work for myself, and maybe prove something on the way' - or 'things are extra hard for me, this makes other things more difficult'. Safe to say these are pretty realistic/common attitudes for transfolk, but if your attitude leans more towards the latter, its probably going to result in you hesitating to do things and progress further - whereas in the case of the former attitude; already having established inner strength makes it soo much easier to tackle obstactles because it's just that much easier to attempt in the first place
I don't think anybody here actually believes being LGBT sucks. I mean, that's kinda silly, its not a disease, but rather the shit that surrounds being LGBT, sucks. Just like everything else, other people. Oh god the politics makes my head spin and the stupidity all around. It makes me wonder some days if common sense and critical thinking are dead.
I seriously just can't fathom how somebody would honestly call this a "trend". And, no, that's definitely not the first time I've heard it. As if some people willingly become LGBT to be "hip", when it makes certain aspects, namely social ones, that much more complex. You don't wake up one day and decide your LGBT. You slowly come to realize it, possibly go through denial, and then live with it, hopefully in a positive way as you described. All over the course of years.
And yes I realize I'm preaching to the choir.
David Reimer's "treatment" was stopped in his early teens and the experiment was shelved. He underwent operations to become male and a decade later married a woman and adopted her children. He lived with her for over two decades before the combination of unemployment, failing marriage, family trouble, and his brother's death drove him to suicide. It's not as simple as "he was raised as a girl and killed himself", he lived 3/4 of his life as male before he died. Having no real childhood and having a strained relationship with his parents didn't help, but it's hardly the driving reason behind his demise.
Now to go off on a tangent I always thought the terms sex and gender were the wrong way round. This is a purely pedantic point but hear me out a moment.
Sex is the fun giggety giggety bunga bunga [cartoon wolf whistle] thing you do with you sexual partner or it might describe what you are sexually attracted to and these things are not necessarily dictated by your
basement equipment so to me it makes sense that your sex identity isn't the biological thing. (as you may choose whom you have sex
with) and sexuality isn't always tied to mechanical configuration despite the norm.
Based on that I feel that gender should be used as the term to describe the clinical chromosome paring you have.
Absolutely nothing against people of any kind of sex/gender, its just a case of word nerd right here.
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.