• Police search for man who licked doorbell for three hours in California
    27 replies, posted
https://news.sky.com/story/police-search-for-man-who-licked-doorbell-for-three-hours-in-california-11602386?fbclid=IwAR0cebi8ldSdifQx8EMiS3-ZNLJX_5ulwGLCVzn0TRFXBufJgvrbs_W50os weird flex but okay
What law did he really break though? /s
The thousand touches of human fingertips consists of so many complex layers of taste, and this is the work of a true connoisseur
For three hours, must be a pretty fucking intense tasting menu
He can taste different fingerprints, he's actually trying to hunt down a criminal of his own There, boom, pitch for a terrible Crime Drama, pay me Fox This summer 'Wall Licker'
Maybe they just want to check if he's ok.
It's only illegal on other planets. Dont see the problem here. Fuckin racist pigs.
Drugs? Drugs.
He now has the knowledge of everyone that touched the doorbell.
just another tale of big prison going after the little guy. man's gotta filter feed
The massive amount of bacteria he collected on his tongue can now be used as a nuclear weapon.
As an expert in tongue-related law, I must inform you that it is doorknobs that are illegal to lick on other planets. Doorbell licking is still illegal in California. But that's typical liberal California, outlawing and over-regulating ridiculous things.
Honestly I'm kind of intrigued as to what led him to do that. If it's drugs, at least it's a funny story. If it's a mental health issue -
https://files.facepunch.com/forum/upload/219126/18384980-8fed-4133-8794-6044861c8e7c/73C8AC5F-FDAE-4D4F-B141-EAA1252D8467.png Like this but with walls.
Ever since I moved to LA I'm not even surprised to hear about something like this happening in California. I live in the western part of the city where it's pretty nice and you still hear about the strange things that homeless or drugged out people do. A few friends and I were standing out front one night after dinner and this random crack head with a weird ass helmet that had chains hanging off of it walked up to my friend and asked for a cigarette. After not getting one he put his helmet on the ground and walked into the street and yelled "LETS SEE WHO'S THE STRONGEST!". Mind you this is a pretty affluent neighborhood and the cops are usually on point in regards to keeping the area safe. It's just that when they pick up someone like that they just sit in jail for a night and are let back out on the street. There's no formal process in regards to getting these people help unfortunately.
And nobody accepted this challenge? You should all be ashamed. https://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/images/thumb/5/51/Saxton.png/250px-Saxton.png
https://files.facepunch.com/forum/upload/113126/6ebeeb9e-ac54-4ea1-b44a-571b4ff40b59/purecapitalism.PNG
Well, considering a user here and dear friend of mine once licked the doorknob on a McDonald's bathroom, I'm not surprised.
One day I hope to love something as much as this lad does.
Oh fuck they found out
there would need to be a scene where he's giving his wife oral sex and he stops and asks her "whose fingerprints are these?"
Shin Detectiburu RickaRottaPussu, coming to funimation this summer
This sounds like the kind of thing you'd hear told to home owner's association people in a Phone Losers of America prank call.
Even if he was fine afterwards, that was a bad idea.
/thread
Probably something along the lines of harassment, as well as potential public urination apparently. There has to be some kind of law he broke on top of scaring the shit out of some folks, no way they'd care enough to look for him otherwise. Dude licked a doorknob for three hours.
This man can't be allowed to roam free. Being this weird should be a crime. this is how it is in downtown San Jose. I keep a mental catalog of the bums and weirdos there and at the university. "Hobo King" is a guy who hangs out around 2nd and Santa Clara Street. I call him that because he has a crown, a boombox, and a shitload of stuff he uses to claim territory. He also has what looks like a cutlass. "Liones" is a guy who walks around with a rolled up blanket on his head(imagine a carpet) which gives him a 7ft horizontal span. "The Wrestler" is the most interesting specimen I've seen yet because the first time I saw him, he was in one of the restaurant areas with a speaker yelling stuff at people and I thought he was trying to promote an amateur wrestling ring because of the way he looks(only wears a black leather vest, skinny black jeans, has mutton chops and a flat top) and he speaks in a dramatic gravely voice like he's playing a wrestling character. The last time I saw him, he was getting into an argument with some old guy of which the old guy could have just let slide and move on about his day. I considered breaking the fight up by appealing to the old guy because he's some old dude with a cane who can barely move, but he kept calling The Wrestler a nigger(the guy is not even black) and pushing him so I figured it was this old racist's time to be put into the dirt so I just let nature take its course. Lastly is "Bubbles." He looks retarded and has giant coke bottle glasses like Bubbles from Trailer Park Boys. He's always in the library on the 2nd floor (the homeless stay here and in the basement) but I've seen him as high as the 8th floor. I personally do not like him because when I was in the restroom, I watched him leave without washing his hands. He has had a bandage on his nose for the past 2 years which I believe was due to a real injury but now he keeps it on for some unknown reason. Wait, what was this thread about again?
I saw this two days ago and I thought it was just a meme someone pulled out of their ass. That's some dedication to lick a doorbell for three hours, on drugs or not.
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