Global crisis as helium shortage takes hold, Party City begins closing stores
41 replies, posted
It's like there's a historic precedent for Republicans being short-sighted when short-term profits are to be made...
Tickle Ben Shapiro and capture the helium released
they can use nitrous oxide instead and make themselves laugh.
Well Zapp Brannigan proposed stealing it from the sun, or as he calls it "the moon," and he's about as intelligent and competent as a conservative government...
I'm glad whenever my spectra come out funny I just tell one of the NMR staff and the goblins come out to fix it magically.
This would be too expensive to be useful, since you'd have to pay someone to touch Ben Shapiro and that would cost a fortune.
Terrestrial helium is only 1.37 ppm He-3. The balance is He-4, produced by alpha decay of various primordial radioisotopes. For human uses, He-3 is primarily produced by beta decay of tritium, which is in turn produced from neutron irradiation of Li-6. Extraterrestrial helium has a much higher proportion of He-3, around 100 ppm.
You guys got the goblin contract? We just opted for routine blood sacrifices.
The running joke here is that the magnet users are actually part of a cult, and a number of us jokingly perform rituals to ensure that our experiments work. We also joke that we can communicate to each other through the magnets with the powers of the bulk magnetization.
Hitting the machine spirits hard.
Who knows, the goblins we hired probably use blood sacrifices themselves.
From what I remember, the helium in balloons is lower purity than what's needed for instrumentation. Helium can be purified but at the moment it just isn't economically viable to do so.
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