Your other paragraphs boil pretty cleanly down to "A didn't always mean asexual, I'm not okay with a straight cis person in LGBTQ+" which is a really poor argument when that's precisely what an ally is.
LGBTQIA+ didn't always exist, either. It used to just be LGBT. And then LGB before that. And then just "gay" before that. But oh, we can't go adding any more A's, that would ruin our perfect little acronym that has never, ever been changed. Talk about historical revisionism.
Asexual people have more "in common" with LGBTQ+ than allies, yet you are throwing them under the bus simply because you want to talk about sex unrestrained in every LGBTQ+ community.
If someone is hated, bullied, beaten, raped, or killed for their sexual orientation, as long as it isn't hurting anyone, they are welcome in LGBTQ+ spaces.
You're presuming that all queer experiences involve sex, when they really don't. Asexual people can be homoromantic and suffer the same stigma. Really, if you saw two gay couples in public and one was asexual, how would you tell the difference? When asexual people are discriminated against over being publicly affectionate to someone of the same gender, do you think they pull out some sort of asexual ID card that stops it all merely because they don't fuck each other?
There is a lot of LGBTQ+ discussion to be had that does not focus on sex. So when you say that asexual people are not part of LGBTQ+ because they suppress your ability to discuss sex openly everywhere, you're also kicking out people in queer relationships otherwise under the LGBTQ+ banner simply because they are asexual.
Rather than worry about what letters in an acronym mean or who specifically is and isn't allowed to be in an inclusive space, how about we focus on the common-sense notion of understanding and sharing communal spaces and exercising discretion and courtesy?
If you're an asexual person and you happen to be sitting at a table in a busy-ass cafe next to a single couple talking loudly about sex, and it's making you uncomfortable, I feel like it's not inappropriate to politely and respectfully ask the couple having a loud and disruptive conversation to take steps to keep it to themselves a bit more. The fact that they might be talking about tying the sub up and ramming his ass with a dildo the size of my leg matters less than they're being loud in a public space.
If you're asexual and you happen to be sitting at a table in a fairly empty cafe and a large group comes in and wants to talk about sex tips as part of a wide-ranging and energetic conversation, you may want to get up and move yourself to a quieter location in the cafe so you're not next to the full table. It's more considerate to just move away from the giant gaggle than to try and tame the gaggle as your first resort.
Obviously, life's never as simple as these nice clean-cut scenarios, but I can't sit here and enumerate every possible social situation to illustrate my point. Instead of arguing over who belongs, everyone should try and make reasonable efforts to accomodate everyone else. Sometimes it'll be reasonable to ask others to change their behaviour, and sometimes the easiest thing will be to just take the initiative yourself -- and you'll note that I didn't suggest leaving the safe space, only finding a better place within it.
Some people won't respond cooperatively to a reasonable request, but that's their damage.
You really are boiling down my entire post to a thin slice one paragraph that was essentially an addendum; the rest of the post stands on its own, which you are literally not addressing. I'm not saying "A didn't always mean asexual, thus it is invalid".
I always assumed everything not covered by LGBT was covered by Q
More recent uses of the acronym have the '+' at the end, so you'll see LGBT+, LGBTQ+, or LGBTQIA+. As for the 'A' meaning "allies" or "asexual", it's just like the 'Q' which means "queer" or "questioning". It doesn't have to mean just one...
But yeah, the 'Q' meaning "queer" would/should cover pretty much anything else unlisted. It's dumb, just like how they are/were trying to add black and brown stripes to the rainbow flag to include racial minorities.
I like Q+
I've never heard anyone else use it, but it's great. "Queer people + people who don't like the label queer that are in [big acronym representing historically oppressed gender/sexual minorities]".
I'm not seeing your point, then. Apparently nobody else is, either.
Nobody is "dictating things within the community" here. An asexual backing away from sexually charged discussions is no different from a male homosexual backing away from a discussion about lesbian sex. If it crosses the line into "I'm going to bitch and whine about it until other people stop talking about it", that is not acceptable behavior from either of them. It makes absolutely zero difference whatsoever that one of them is a straight cis person.
Could've sworn that this was their flag.
https://twitter.com/ryanbroems/status/1004398179977256960
there's people in the LGBT+ community that still have negative experiences with the usage of the word "queer" as a slur so some might not be as willing to adopt that acronym just yet
My girlfriend is Ace and can affirm this. She often doesn't feel comfortable with LGBTQ+ spaces because of people like Peachy who think Ace people don't belong. It's disgusting, Ace has a place in LGBTQ+.
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