Cuckolding can be positive for some couples, study says - Sensationalist Headlines

[QUOTE=MadBomber;53086966]I want to stop reading this thread but I can't, it's like a train crash in slow motion.[/QUOTE] This is my wifes sons favorite thread in SH. [editline]27th January 2018[/editline] [QUOTE=carcarcargo;53086967]I'd say that sounds more like it's trying to say it's the majority. Saying that the study was also written by a pseudoscientist so that's no surprise.[/QUOTE] It was written by two people with PhD's in psychology [editline]27th January 2018[/editline] The study is no longer paywalled, it looks like they simply asked people whether they had acted on their cuckold fantasy, if it was as good as they expected, and if it improved their relationship and 73.9% said it improved their relationship. I feel like it would be hard to know for sure though without asking their SO, but in any case it looks like we were both wrong.

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;53086967]I'd say that sounds more like it's trying to say it's the majority. Saying that the study was also written by a pseudoscientist so that's no surprise.[/QUOTE] today I learned that 'some' means 'most' english is an amazing language, even now I'm discovering new things

[QUOTE=Episode;53086877] This thread has literally devolved into "IT'S OKAY TO HAVE A FETISH THAT LITERALLY PUTS YOURSELF DOWN" [/QUOTE] What separates this particular fetish from other fetishes that involve degradation or humiliation besides the fact this one is a meme? A vast majority of even "vanilla porn" seems to be centred at least partially around humiliation so it's not like this one, admittedly rather extreme and personally off-putting, fetish is the sole example of people "putting themselves or others down" in the bedroom- it seems like a fairly popular kink even among less adventurous people, cuckolding just takes it much further than most people would enjoy.

[QUOTE=MadBomber;53086966]I want to stop reading this thread but I can't, it's like a train crash in slow motion. Edit: would this make it thread cucking?[/QUOTE] This is by far my favourite thread of 2018 yet, it spans the spectrum from entrenched shitflinging to someone actually changing their mind on the matter.

[QUOTE=Episode;53086877]This pretty much. Kinda hard to be confident when you're pushing this idea in your head that you're less of a man and that your wife prefers someone else. Not a good idea to be enabling people who think like this. If you think like this, you need help. This thread has literally devolved into "IT'S OKAY TO HAVE A FETISH THAT LITERALLY PUTS YOURSELF DOWN" What the actual fuck[/QUOTE] I feel like you're unable to separate cuckolding from other fetishes of a similar nature. What happens in the context of the bedroom is [I]completely[/I] different from what happens in your day-to-day life. How you choose to interpret what is done to you in the bedroom is your problem. It's sort of like, for example, a stereotypical, commandeering business executive-type who likes to be tied down and called a dirty boy while women kick him in the balls. Does it get him off? Oh, yeah. Do you like it? Probably not. But you can't disagree that in spite of his sexual interests, he leads a perfectly successful life as a (presumably) pretty confident guy. Cuckolding is no different, it's just another means to the same ends. I don't understand why the nature of cuckolding is so different to you. If someone has self-esteem issues and cuckolds themselves as a result, that's a shame, but that doesn't make the fetish as a whole any more flawed than any of its contemporaries.

Cuckold is kinda like a poop fetish. I personally am ok with the fact that you want to literally eat shit and get massive boners because of it, but GROSS dude

[QUOTE=Zoran;53087046]I feel like you're unable to separate cuckolding from other fetishes of a similar nature. What happens in the context of the bedroom is [I]completely[/I] different from what happens in your day-to-day life. How you choose to interpret what is done to you in the bedroom is your problem. It's sort of like, for example, a stereotypical, commandeering business executive-type who likes to be tied down and called a dirty boy while women kick him in the balls. Does it get him off? Oh, yeah. Do you like it? Probably not. But you can't disagree that in spite of his sexual interests, he leads a perfectly successful life as a (presumably) pretty confident guy. Cuckolding is no different, it's just another means to the same ends. I don't understand why the nature of cuckolding is so different to you. If someone has self-esteem issues and cuckolds themselves as a result, that's a shame, but that doesn't make the fetish as a whole any more flawed than any of its contemporaries.[/QUOTE] I guess I get it now, I just couldn't see anyone being attracted to cuckolding without being insecure in the first place. I'll never understand entirely but for now your analogy with the executive makes sense. [editline]27th January 2018[/editline] Another thing too btw. My posts kinda came across the wrong way, as if shaming a cuckold is okay. If you believe cuckolding is bad then shaming them isn't going to help. Shaming anyone for their fetish isn't good nor does it help, even if you think cuckolding is wrong. So sorry if I came across that way but I just felt like I might have.. I do have one legit concern about cuckolding though.. why the fuck are porn sites COVERED in it. I mean, just look at the front page of xhamster. There's ASS loads of that shit on there constantly, more cuckold porn than anything. Seems like people take videos of white chicks getting banged by black dudes, archive them. Rename them to something cuckold related

[QUOTE=Episode;53087073] I do have one legit concern about cuckolding though.. why the fuck are porn sites COVERED in it. I mean, just look at the front page of xhamster. There's ASS loads of that shit on there constantly, more cuckold porn than anything. Seems like people take videos of white chicks getting banged by black dudes, archive them. Rename them to something cuckold related[/QUOTE] Probably because pornhub's sorting algo works off of the popularity of fetish keyword presence on the internet, and "cuck" is currently used a million times a minute in both sexual and nonsexual contexts.

[QUOTE=duckmaster;53086963]I could not be in a relationship where someone has so little respect for themselves that they can trick themselves into thinking they are okay with their partner having sex with someone else. At that point its just utterly sad and pathetic.[/QUOTE] And if it genuinely turns him on?

I have a reason to believe that some of the people here don't understand that various fetishes rely on roleplaying, which means that just because they're being "pathetic" or they're being "degraded" in bed, which is something they're roleplaying, it doesn't mean that this carries on for the rest of their lives. They're not being "less of a (wo)man" (which is an argument I see being thrown a lot) because they're being tied up in bed, for example. They got tied up because they're into it, they like that they're restrained, and overall it's one of their kinks. They're [I]roleplaying[/I] that they're being restrained by rope or cuffs because they like it, because of whatever reason, and of course, you don't see these people carrying around cuffs or rope in their everyday lives because that's just silly. Point is that just because such person has a kink which degrades them in some way, it doesn't really shape them in personality. I'm sure that we've interacted with people who are really nice guys and gals, which are outgoing, friendly, etc, in the internet or otherwise. They might have kinks that degrade them, and they might not even be afraid to talk about those kinks if asked to or if the current topic brings it up, but being able to talk about those kinks in the first place is what makes them secure, and even then they're still friendly. Sure, you might not like the kink yourself, but they're not harming anybody by partaking on their kinks with their partner(s), either, and since it's roleplay, they're not [I]actually[/I] being degraded, since it's just a fantasy for them. With that being said, degrading and shaming people for having such kinks is not a good practice, but I'm glad that some people are being understanding and listening to other users. I just hope that being rude, either overall or to other people, because of their kinks, doesn't become standard practice, because it won't bode well. I hope everyone gives each other the benefit of the doubt and don't attribute the seemingly malicious posts as real malice but ignorance, because respecting each other will take us farther than insulting each other.

[QUOTE=Talvy;53087114]And if it genuinely turns him on?[/QUOTE] He's still sad and pathetic.

[QUOTE=duckmaster;53087131]He's still sad and pathetic.[/QUOTE] Do you think that all people in relationships, and all swingers, are also all sad and pathetic

[QUOTE=duckmaster;53087131]He's still sad and pathetic.[/QUOTE] What's your fetish?

[QUOTE=phygon;53087135]Do you think that all people in relationships, and all swingers, are also all sad and pathetic[/QUOTE] What? That doesn't even makes sense, how did you make the jump from "he's talking shit about a very specific, extremely demeaning fetish" to [I]that?[/I]

[QUOTE=jimhowl33t;53087177]What? That doesn't even makes sense, how did you make the jump from "he's talking shit about a very specific, extremely demeaning fetish" to [I]that?[/I][/QUOTE] I'm asking a question because I'm trying to understand his position, I'm not jumping to anything. I asked a question, I didn't make an accusation.

[QUOTE=phygon;53087254]I'm asking a question because I'm trying to understand his position, I'm not jumping to anything. I asked a question, I didn't make an accusation.[/QUOTE] And I'm trying to understand [I]how[/I] you're trying to understand his position, considering your post was, at least IMO, very far out there. I'm not making accusations either, I'm just baffled. Like, he has a personal deep dislike for a fetish that, as this thread proves, is [I]very[/I] polarizing. Why would you go and ask if he feels the same about a [I]very different fetish[/I], or for that matter [I]ANYONE in a relationship[/I]?

[QUOTE=jimhowl33t;53087278]And I'm trying to understand [I]how[/I] you're trying to understand his position, considering your post was, at least IMO, very far out there. I'm not making accusations either, I'm just baffled. Like, he has a personal deep dislike for a fetish that, as this thread proves, is [I]very[/I] polarizing. Why would you go and ask if he feels the same about a [I]very different fetish[/I], or for that matter [I]ANYONE in a relationship[/I]?[/QUOTE] Swinging really isn't drastically different from cuckolding, it's just that cuckolding has denialism sprinkled in.

[QUOTE=JugadorXEI;53087130]word.[/QUOTE] Something people keep completely missing is that this cuckold stuff inserts a third person into the relationship. If you and your partner tie eachother up, roleplay rape, fucking bungee jump sex, nobody has a problem with that because it's between you and your partner. The issue I, and I think a lot of other people have, is that you're introducing a third and completely foreign element into a relationship that massively disrupts and/or outright destroys any previous emotional connection you may have had with this partner. This is also applicable even without assigning any emotional value since it shatters physical intimacy, which also has value to people. Relationships are exclusive for a reason. People are inherently possessive and I honestly don't think an emotionally healthy person can seriously engage in the cuckold fetish.

[QUOTE=SAULSBASHWALL;53086703]Right now there's nothing more powerful or courageous than letting another man fuck your wife, and don't let anyone take that power away from you.[/QUOTE] l o l

[QUOTE=Zoran;53087291]Swinging really isn't drastically different from cuckolding, it's just that cuckolding has denialism sprinkled in.[/QUOTE] I mean, swinging means everyone gets some action, cuckolding means one of the participants just sits in a corner trying to hold back tears. That's a pretty big difference if you ask me.

[QUOTE=MrHeadHopper;53087295]you're introducing a third and completely foreign element into a relationship that massively disrupts and/or outright destroys any previous emotional connection you may have had with this partner.[/QUOTE] What? Do you actually know how any of this shit works? Most couples who wish to partake usually vet their bull, and build up a repertoire with him before going to the bedroom. Everyone has to click for it to work. As such, since it is concensoul between all involved parties, it doesn't disrupt or ~destroy~ any emotional connection you have with your partner, it strengthens it. [QUOTE=MrHeadHopper;53087295]This is also applicable even without assigning any emotional value since it shatters physical intimacy, which also has value to people.[/quote] See above. [QUOTE=MrHeadHopper;53087295]Relationships are exclusive for a reason. People are inherently possessive and I honestly don't think an emotionally healthy person can seriously engage in the cuckold fetish.[/QUOTE] lol. they're exclusive because that's what the norm has been, there's not really a "reason" about possessiveness behind it. There are other cultures out there that have different marriage practices, some with polygamy, a couple with polyandry, that work just fine. So in short, emotionally healthy people can and do seriously engage in cuckoldry. [editline]27th January 2018[/editline] [QUOTE=jimhowl33t;53087307]I mean, swinging means everyone gets some action, cuckolding means one of the participants just sits in a corner trying to hold back tears. That's a pretty big difference if you ask me.[/QUOTE] why are you assuming they're "holding back tears" and that they're not enjoying the whole experience (i'll give you a hint they are, it's why they're participating in the first damn place). [editline]27th January 2018[/editline] like w/e if it doesn't get your rocks off, it doesn't need to. but these awful mindsets of "they're pathetic", "its not mentally safe" etc... are wrong and downright insulting.

[QUOTE=jimhowl33t;53087307]I mean, swinging means everyone gets some action, cuckolding means one of the participants just sits in a corner trying to hold back tears. That's a pretty big difference if you ask me.[/QUOTE] No, as bdd458 said, it's more like a guy sitting in the corner (or right under them while they're going at it) and basking in it or jerking off. I don't get off to it, either, but at least understand the subject you're talking about if you're going to discredit it.

[QUOTE=phygon;53087135]Do you think that all people in relationships, and all swingers, are also all sad and pathetic[/QUOTE] most swingers are middle aged people trying to spice up dying marriages which is pretty sad in and of itself

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;53087328]most swingers are middle aged people trying to spice up dying marriages which is pretty sad in and of itself[/QUOTE] Right thats not completely true but also what's wrong with trying new things, especially if your marriage hasnt been working what do you have to lose? Its astounding that people in this thread have such an averse reaction to something that doesnt involve them at all

[QUOTE=bdd458;53087313]like w/e if it doesn't get your rocks off, it doesn't need to. but these awful mindsets of "they're pathetic", "its not mentally safe" etc... are wrong and downright insulting.[/QUOTE] Opinions opinions. Personally I don't think surrendering yourself to your shortcomings or even [I]fetishizing[/I] them is that healthy of a mindset and will result in a happy life. Like, I get spicing things up with extra partners every now and then, but the other kind? The one where people go "I'm not good in bed, I guess I'll just watch from the sidelines. This is my life now", that's what I find kinda disturbing. These may be just my two cents, but I can't really wrap my mind about getting told "I only like you as a friend" [I]by the one you love[/I] and somehow thinking that's a good, healthy relationship. I'm not calling them pathetic, I'm saying they're calling [I]themselves[/I] pathetic and [B]turning self-loathing into a lifestyle[/B]. And after coming out of some seriously messed-up near-suicidal depression, I feel myself physically unable to call that a healthy mindset or even saying "If that's what makes you happy, go ahead". I can't help but feel like something went wrong in their lives and they need help, not encouragement. As in, had I gotten encouragement instead of help when I was going through similar kinds of self-loathing, I would be in a wooden box with a hole through my skull and that's a fate I wouldn't even wish upon my worst enemy.

This thread's reaction reminds me of back when FP used to have porn threads and how much of a negative reaction anyone bringing up NTR has brought out.

[QUOTE=jimhowl33t;53087366]Opinions opinions. Personally I don't think surrendering yourself to your shortcomings or even [I]fetishizing[/I] them is that healthy of a mindset and will result in a happy life. [/QUOTE] Who said that these people actually suffer from the inadequacies that their fetishes entail? I'm pretty sure that people who are into the whole "sexy nurse" thing aren't actually sick.

[QUOTE=gufu;53087368]This thread's reaction reminds me of back when FP used to have porn threads and how much of a negative reaction anyone bringing up NTR has brought out.[/QUOTE] I know better than to google this, what's NTR?

I’m going to let you in on a secret: they don’t actually have issues with self-loathing.

[QUOTE=Ardosos;53087379]I know better than to google this, what's NTR?[/QUOTE] Netorare - Cheating Hentai.