Young Chinese are 'too fat and masturbate too much to pass army fitness tests'

[QwertyTSecond]

[QUOTE=MrBacon;52611334]I'd rather not make my health any worse than it is already[/QUOTE]

I dunno man, bullets are pretty bad for your health too.

[Provost]

[QUOTE=Pascall;52611152]You make it sound like soldiers are just out here having communal wank sessions.

Unless they do in which case, y'know... don't let me stop them.[/QUOTE]

Most of the Army sticks to whacking one off in the latrine, or the porta-shitter if we're on exercise.

Cavalry scouts, on the other hand...

[editline]25th August 2017[/editline]

By the way, what are the fitness requirements for the PLA? Probably pathetically easy, considering they're a conscript force.

[Carlito]

[QUOTE=Zoombini;52611034]I can see why being fat would exclude you from the army, obviously, but what about wanking stops you from joining?[/QUOTE]

Tennis elbow.

[Mort Stroodle]

[QUOTE=Zoombini;52611034]I can see why being fat would exclude you from the army, obviously, but what about wanking stops you from joining?[/QUOTE]

Well for one thing you need both hands free to do push-ups.

[Draza~]

[QUOTE=Naelstrom;52611028]I thought masturbation was healthy tho

[editline]asdf[/editline]

How do I check my testicular veins?[/QUOTE]
Masturbation is healthy.
Masturbating multiple times a day everyday all the time is not.

[shrinkme]

[QUOTE=Episode;52614107]Masturbation is healthy.
Masturbating multiple times a day everyday all the time is not.[/QUOTE]

What if you switch hands everytime?

[Provost]

[QUOTE=Mort Stroodle;52614085]Well for one thing you need both hands free to do push-ups.[/QUOTE]

And your hands need to be interlocked behind your head for sit-ups.

Running, however, is fair game. Nowhere in the PT test rules does it say you can't jack off during the 2-mile run event.

[Blazedol]

[QUOTE=ScreamingGerbil;52611272]As far as I recall varicocele is when the veins in your scrote tangle up creating sort of a knot, which can cause pain and swelling and whatnot. When I had to go through medical exams before my conscription the doctor felt up my balls to check for it. It's standard procedure but it was really unpleasant.[/QUOTE]

One of the possible and most accepted causes is when blood gets backed up, which can be when the veins get tied up or something else my be blocking it, but officially that’s not accepted. But I doubt masturbation is the actual cause of the swelling, actually I think it might be more tied to their weight problems if anything.

[Jund]

[QUOTE=Mort Stroodle;52614085]Well for one thing you need both hands free to do push-ups.[/QUOTE]

not if you're good at one handed push-ups

[Patrick]

[QUOTE=Bradyns;52611281]Looks like I'm not joining the Chinese army, fellas.[/QUOTE]

my gf is away for the week, i won't be able to join them either after this.

[Mr.Brown]

glad to see that they're touching themselves so much that they cant invade us

[MrWasabi]

[QUOTE=Episode;52614107]
Masturbating multiple times a day everyday all the time is not.[/QUOTE]

:frown: ..... I'm dying...

[Provost]

[QUOTE=Ta16;52615280]:frown: ..... I'm dying...[/QUOTE]

until valhalla, brother

[Sableye]

[quote]
A poor diet and frequent masturbation, leading to abnormally large testicular veins, are believed to be behind falling fitness levels, according to a report published in state-run military newspaper the People’s Liberation Army Daily.[/quote]

if this is official from their medical corps then what in the fuck do their hospitals look like

"here soldier, huff this rhino horn to cure your gunshot wound!"

[Bertie]

If I spent every second I spent fapping towards developing myself physically and mentally I would be god-king of the galaxy by now.

[Heigou]

[QUOTE=ScreamingGerbil;52611272]As far as I recall varicocele is when the veins in your scrote tangle up creating sort of a knot, which can cause pain and swelling and whatnot. When I had to go through medical exams before my conscription the doctor felt up my balls to check for it. It's standard procedure but it was really unpleasant.[/QUOTE]

Wait, I have a varicocele, do you mean I would be unfit for service because of it? wtf

[ferrous]

[QUOTE=Heigou;52615482]Wait, I have a varicocele, do you mean I would be unfit for service because of it? wtf[/QUOTE]

In China. Likely not elsewhere.

[Peon Greenjoy]

[QUOTE=Psychokitten;52615286]until valhalla, brother[/QUOTE]

until ballhalla

[Paul-Simon]

[QUOTE=Episode;52614107]Masturbation is healthy.
Masturbating multiple times a day everyday all the time is not.[/QUOTE]

Hmm, I always did wonder why my arm fell off