Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer revealed to be unnecessary after journalist uses their hands instead - Sensationalist Headlines

[QUOTE=Talishmar;52135613]Wow, how incompetent can you be. All they had to do prevent this obvious circumvent is to put a barcode with an unique ID which the device accepts once each. With IoT you could have each unique ID marked used globally if you want to go the extra mile to prevent sharing used codes across machines. Should I not give them ideas?[/QUOTE] I believe the machine in the article reads a QR code on each bag to confirm that the bag is made by Juicero. Keurig really screwed up.

Good to see that marketing wank is still a billion-dollar industry, I guess.

My brain can't comprehend this. Why are people buying US$399 juice machines? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With subscriptions? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With the requirement that the juicier be online? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With fruit and carrot drm? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With monthly subscriptions? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] OMG. what is the world coming to?

[QUOTE=shian;52135314][url]http://www.theverge.com/2017/4/20/15375940/juicero-full-refund-customers-ceo-jeff-dunn[/url] lmao[/QUOTE] look at his soft dainty hands as he cuts open that juice bag lmbo

[QUOTE=DogGunn;52136116]My brain can't comprehend this. Why are people buying US$399 juice machines? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With subscriptions? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With the requirement that the juicier be online? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With fruit and carrot drm? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With monthly subscriptions? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] OMG. what is the world coming to?[/QUOTE] Because they love being slaves to shelling money out to really shitty companies

[QUOTE=DogGunn;52136116]My brain can't comprehend this. Why are people buying US$399 juice machines? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With subscriptions? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With the requirement that the juicier be online? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With fruit and carrot drm? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] With monthly subscriptions? [editline]23rd April 2017[/editline] OMG. what is the world coming to?[/QUOTE] People have been buying stupid shit since forever, I mean fuck, you ever hear of infomercials?

[QUOTE=Nautsabes;52136153]look at his soft dainty hands as he cuts open that juice bag lmbo[/QUOTE] I honestly thought it was a girl cutting into that bag at first. :v: Even my hands are not that soft or small. Love how the contents are pretty much just shredded fruit as well, what a waste of money overall.

hey here's an idea buy fresh fruit for a few dollars and fucking squeeze it yourself [editline]22nd April 2017[/editline] if you're trying to be healthy drinking juices you might as well burn off a few extra calories by squeezing fruit

[QUOTE=LtKyle2;52134882]This internet connected fad creates the dumbest crap.[/QUOTE] Its going to keep getting 'dumber', because there doesn't need to be any really good feature to justify going IOT. The data collection, and the fact that you don't have put buttons/leds/screens/speakers on devices and instead use a phone is enough of a reason for companies to make things IOT.

[QUOTE=Cold;52136570]Its going to keep getting 'dumber', because there doesn't need to be any really good feature to justify going IOT. The data collection, and the fact that you don't have put buttons/leds/screens/speakers on devices and instead use a phone is enough of a reason for companies to make things IOT.[/QUOTE] Well, I guess the future is looking bright for people who create and administrate botnets, because you [I]know[/I] the security is half-assed shite on these things too. Just think, all those toasters, juicers, and refrigerators being used like a rag-tag army by some angry pissant teenager to bring down the servers of a game he got banned from. [I]The perfect criiiime.[/I]

[QUOTE=Noob4life;52135220]Okay, so this is obviously a luxury good made to squeeze the juice out of high class, serious juice drinkers. The machine's obviously full of shit that doesn't need to cost this much. But what about the juice? Are they good? They advertised that those are some of the freshest juice made with the best motherfucking plants on Earth. So? Are they? Like, I like that they have a scheduled delivery of packs and the QR code that... verify whatever details (it is a nice touch nonetheless). I mean, I checked their website and it is actually full of convincing shit, can't deny that their stuff is either actually good (but a little pricey[B]) or their marketers have a way with words.[/B][/QUOTE] If you trust marketers about their opinions about how good a product is, particularly something as subjective (and thus legally bulletproof) as taste, you're going to get taken advantage of. If there's one thing for which cynicism is always a safe bet, it's advertising.

We made a juicer! But it's smaller!

can't imagine there is much difficulty in hacking into this "juicer" to make it press down without any QR code required. I mean it's a household appliance, not much chance of any real major protections

[QUOTE=Snowmew;52133766]See, I don't. The packs last for 5-7 days, and that's assuming they sell off the shelf immediately. These sort of recalls they talk about are generally just one-off incidents; a very, very select few batches are contaminated. Usually by the time the offending batches have been identified, it's been at least a week. By that time, they'll have already been consumed or - in this case - expired. Since the unit will not press an expired pack, they just get thrown out. The "product recalls" line is 100% bogus. They likely have the capability to recall something, but this data is being sent back for datamining, not for customer safety. Their [URL="https://www.juicero.com/privacy-policy/"]privacy policy[/URL] is a fucking joke - they flat-out tell you that they sell this information, and they'll probably sell advertising space for you to their "affiliated businesses" in the future based on this information.[/QUOTE] Considering the lifespan of the produce, yeah the recall functionality isn't super useful. But as a general feature that other IoT enabled appliances could have in the future (for longer lived goods), it isn't that bad an idea to be honest. Of all the things the juicer does that's probably the most redeemable use of IoT functionality. The whole product reeks of it being a marketing exercise anyway. To get this many big name investors involved in a product that genuinely has no market is quite strange. The IoT functionality doesn't provide any real tangible benefits. And it costs 400 fucking cashmoney. Along with the datamining aspect (as you pointed out). The guys behind it probably spent a fraction of their investor budget on making the actual product, and a vast majority of it on advertising. You don't need to make a good product to become known as a marketing guru, but considering the insane coverage this thing is getting (both good and bad) the guys behind it are going to be fairly known in the entrepreneur world I expect. They managed to sell something people otherwise wouldn't ever have considered after all. [editline]22nd April 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=froztshock;52136615]Well, I guess the future is looking bright for people who create and administrate botnets, because you [I]know[/I] the security is half-assed shite on these things too. Just think, all those toasters, juicers, and refrigerators being used like a rag-tag army by some angry pissant teenager to bring down the servers of a game he got banned from. [I]The perfect criiiime.[/I][/QUOTE] And this to, considering the nature of the product I sincerely doubt they actually paid their developers enough for them to give a fuck about securing the networking on it. Come the fuck on dudes, IoT has no reason to be insecure considering all you need to do to secure data being sent is use standard protocols like SSL, and to prevent people from replacing the OS or hijacking the device just use some simple fucking authentication via shared keys or something holy shit.

I think if you own one of these you are probably retarded.

i sometimes happen think i'm an idiot thank god for this reinforcement that if i am an idiot, i'm not that idiot

[QUOTE=Ithon;52132066]wait, this is a juicer [media]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIO3pRuaDmw[/media] this wifi juicer is a capri sun auto squeezer[/QUOTE] That literally looks like diarrhea coming out the machine. I'd rather eat the potato with the skin by itself rather than with the rest of that shit.

I just find it incredibly weird that this was made and is now something you can actually buy. Juicers are products you buy for people for x-mas and they use maybe for a month at the most before they go back to buying juice directly from a store since it's more convenient. I can see the appeal of this if you really want to make your own juice but really don't want to spend the time on it but at that price point, why? This whole product doesn't make sense but considering I live in Silicon Valley and have lived here all my life and watched my city get gentrified, I can see how this happened. This directly appeals to the Whole Foods consumer base. People here have a lot of money and no time for themselves so they try to squeeze as much enjoyment as they possibly can out of the very little free time they have. This juicer is just another way for them to squeeze a few extra minutes of free time into their day or gain a little bit more of enjoyment as they try to relax after a long, hard day of work. This was probably also pitched as an alternative to exercising since a lot of people here try to live healthy but it's hard put the time and effort into that since it's the not the kind of thing people are into doing unless they're already doing it. On top of that, people here like cool gadgets and they saw this as one. I on the other hand, am going to stick to blending my own smoothies

And then I have to argue with other people at my uni over capitalism spilling resources over completely useless shit. All that money. Imagine if they actually funded building roads, wells, wind farms in Africa, health programs. Oh no, A IoT JUICER IS MUCH BETTER AND PROFITABLE!!1!11one For fucks sake

I can't honestly understand why a VC firm would fund this, like they aren't doing anything of well... anything.

[QUOTE=Cutthecrap;52137289]And then I have to argue with other people at my uni over capitalism spilling resources over completely useless shit. All that money. Imagine if they actually funded building roads, wells, wind farms in Africa, health programs. Oh no, A IoT JUICER IS MUCH BETTER AND PROFITABLE!!1!11one For fucks sake[/QUOTE] A crowdfunded juicer being invested in and purchased isn't really comparable to third world investment tbh

nothing is wrong with a wifi juicer at a concept. in fact, if done right, it'd be great. a juicer similar to those wifi/bluetooth drink makers that give you suggestions based on what you have, or a juicer that measures exact amounts of certain ingredients to give you a perfect blend sounds great. not for everyone but it keeps your ingredients potentially locally sourced (sweet, better than prepackaging shit all the way from california or wherever) and isn't too much work compared to the bag. i mean, you still have to go to the whole foods to buy the bag, so you might as well by a bundle of fruits and veggies based on an app that tells you "hey, you should try this tomorrow! here's what you'll need." sounds great, fuckin sign me up please. please sell my usage data to google, whatever lmao, at least your product functions. pre-packaged juicer bags sound like the most boring shit ever. it's like blue apron with less interesting combinations and you have to buy a $400 appliance for it alongside it. ridiculous.

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;52136611]Was the whole goal of these to datamine people who are retarded enough to buy this product?[/QUOTE] this is why google helped fund juicero

This is basically like those toasters that print smiley faces but for the top 15%. Same crap, different target audience.

[QUOTE=Gamerman12;52138847]nothing is wrong with a wifi juicer at a concept.[/QUOTE] ARE YOU SURE?

[QUOTE=RearAdmiral;52138630]A crowdfunded juicer being invested in and purchased isn't really comparable to third world investment tbh[/QUOTE] Sorry, but I read in the quote that some companies poured in a crapton of money into this. Not just individuals. Do you get my point? Why would you say they aren't really comparable? (I'm not quite getting your point)

[QUOTE=1/4 Life;52138904]ARE YOU SURE?[/QUOTE] I need everything to be iConnected or else I wouldn't feel totes meshed with today's tomorrow today! -_- #theyjustdontgetit #isupportgoal #madaboutsomething

[QUOTE=Cutthecrap;52137289]And then I have to argue with other people at my uni over capitalism spilling resources over completely useless shit. All that money. Imagine if they actually funded building roads, wells, wind farms in Africa, health programs. Oh no, A IoT JUICER IS MUCH BETTER AND PROFITABLE!!1!11one For fucks sake[/QUOTE] The R&D for this thing couldn't have costed more than a few million dollars. Any sort of infrastructure project in Africa or anywhere else would cost orders of magnitude more. This is not an issue with capitalism at all. The market will completely fuck this company into the ground by the end of next week, like it should.

The concept of having the packaged stuff that can be squeezed out isn't that bad though. It's still expensive but I can see health nuts finding that attractive. Still, in the end if you want juice you're better off just buying a juicer and using the produce yourself. It'll be cheaper. All around it's just a bad idea.

[QUOTE=1/4 Life;52138904]ARE YOU SURE?[/QUOTE] yeah i'm cool with that. it's not inherently a bad idea, though i'd bet most like you would just find it pointless. at a decent price (sub $100 or so, hell i'd even say $150 wouldn't be the [i]worst[/i]) it wouldn't hurt at the very least, and if done properly (i.e. functional without wifi but enhanced with it; no fucking drm please; and most importantly having a robust featureset that actively improves the product/quality of life of the user and helps them reach their goals better) it could be pretty good. i'm not saying everyone needs one, lmao. i'm just saying if you can make a product that functions with those three ideas in mind, most importantly the last one. i'd say my idea is a worthwhile product for someone who is just getting into drinking juices and doesn't know how many of what ingredients make a good juice. or if they want some fresh ideas while out, they can have an integrated app that they create a shopping list with and then apply their food to that shopping list. or like i mentioned earlier, they can note down what food they do have, and get suggestions based off of that. albeit that's generally more app based than anything, but hey, i'm just throwing out ideas on how to take the concept "wifi juicer" and actually make it more than a useless squeezer. at the end of the day, it's not the worst product in the world if it actively can help SOMEONE. worthless to most? probably, just get a regular juicer if you don't need it. but some people might appreciate it and use it every day, and eventually get into a healthier lifestyle and try to open their boundaries a bit more, while still eating healthy. that's not a good business motto but i'm just spitballing here. something like the Juicero actively overprices everything they create, which hurts the end user, especially if they don't even get to choose their own drinks, and it doesn't really do much for the ecosystem (in fact it probably fucks up the ecosystem more, similar to keurig. i bet those bags aren't even fuckin biodegradeable.) i think the worst part about my product i made up in 5 seconds is that it's mostly app based and a lot of the benefits don't really tie into the product itself. it's still not raw DRM capri suns that cost $7 a pop, tho.