Black Mesa - Skipping Shift

Is this a comic about Black Mesa, or just one strip?

my welcome?

Will be a Comic, Yeah :smile:

[editline]4th May 2014[/editline]

?

it’s spelled “you’re”

[editline]4th May 2014[/editline]

“your” is like “your car”, “your computer”

Not sure whether to be insulted, or take it as critique, I’ll take it as critique…

Why would you be?

He wasn’t insulting you. He was telling you the difference between “Your”, and “You’re”.

“Your” is used to indicate that one belonging to one self, or to any person. EX: “Is this your bike?”, “Your office is that way”, etc.

“You’re” is basically saying “You are”. If you were to use “You’re” in a sentence, like “You are pretty cool”, or “You are welcome”, you would say “You’re pretty cool”, or “You’re welcome”.

Forgive me for sounding like a major Grammar Nazi. We’re just informing you on what the difference is. :v:

[editline]4th May 2014[/editline]

I shall trust you sir, simply because of your Avatar GIF making me actually choke, seeing the exact same GIF only two minutes before :v:

http://puu.sh/8zd8J.jpg

If the right bubble is supposed to be read before the left one then it should be higher than the left one.

My two pieces of advise to you here and now are:

  1. Have your a panels on one image, uploading them as separate images is counter-intuitive.

  2. Less cussing, every other speech bubble has some form of swear word in it with such frequency it doesn’t feel natural.

Also what are you using to edit these together?

Also:

I can’t stress that enough. Could’ve sworn I told you that in Espionage Wars, too.

No offense, but it’s not 2006 anymore. You should really light your panels.

This is needlessly dark.

[editline]4th May 2014[/editline]

Also: use periods at the end of sentences, and you don’t capitalize things after commas.

The stuff I like…

1.) I like the setting of the story.

My constructive criticisms

1.) Is that Arial you are using? I recommend you use another font like Web Letterer BB. You can download these fonts from dafont.com.

I was looking at some of RobDavids25’s Espionage War screenshots and some of them are nicely lit. Yes, RobDavids25, you should light your comics the same way you light your Espionage War screenshots.

Other than that, thanks for sharing your comics.

At least some people have nice things to say :smile:

Nobody has said anything negative, they have only said criticism. Criticism does not equate negativity.

And I suppose I’ll adress some of the issues, like lighting and such, but please bare in mind; I am fairly new to this, and I’ll admit my grammar leaves somthing to be desired, but I’ll see what I can do.

[editline]4th May 2014[/editline]

Feels like negativity to me, may just be me, but still.

well purely positive feedback rarely helps anyone improve

Fairly Good point

  • posing is okay, not amazing but okay, try working on smaller details or emphasizing more on actions
  • angles aren’t too great, try backing up and zooming in a bit more
  • odd phrasing, if english is not your first language I’d suggest finding someone to spellcheck these for you
  • make all of your panels one image, this makes reading much smoother and easier for the reader
  • lighting: this isn’t a cinematic screenshot or anything so it’s not too important, but some lighting could really help the feeling of a few panels

Also just a sidenote towards your views on criticisms and others, but around here on facepunch most people have a complex of giving criticism in mainly insulting, subtle, or sarcastic fashions, so slight aggression towards it is somewhat understandable, but just try to take a deep breath and roll with it. Buried under the asinine attempts at wit are often legit criticism that can help you improve if you take them to heart and work on it.