Shit that gets you mad in Gmod v2

Old [v1]: http://forum.facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1235980

Old one got closed for reaching 5000 posts.

What shit gets you mad in Garry’s Mod?

People who ask stupid questions about something which is very clearly answered in the MOTD.

Rest in peace, old thread. Rest in peace.

quote from every 12 year old who wants to host servers

“where can i download perp”

Big Server Men make me made. :frown:

Tiny Server Men kinda piss me off too. Something about them…

Don’t forget the wannabe Big Server Men, that just come short of the Tiny Server Men.

Someone asking for more than an hour of work and offering $2.50. Then says I would have to wait till the end of the month to be paid.

Serverwatch and Prop Kill.

Last thread Soleeedus mentioned this email:

Another user said they got this email too, and so did I. I replied referring him to the Valve developer wiki, particularly the Server Query page for Source.

If you haven’t got this email already, should be pretty obvious that you should add this to your spam filter.

Odd thing is, he used an email address that I only ever receive on my mobile, i don’t even seriously use it and I thought it was sent to one of my primary emails.

So I’ve gotten back into Garry’s Mod recently and there are a few things that I’ve come to hate about RP these days (mostly DarkRP, since there aren’t too many non-DarkRP roleplay servers to play on anymore).

First and foremost, no one really role-plays. Almost nobody even uses an RP name, even. You might meet the occasional cool character like a hobo that fights crime and pukes on cops, but most of the time he’ll get swiped off the street in two seconds by an admin like a hawk to a chicken and get banned because fun is specifically prohibited, and he would have known this if he had just read the four-hundred-rule MOTD that is practically the same for every server. Those moments are overshadowed by the amount of times you just come across a gang of people that already know each other, barricaded in a building somewhere remote with their gun dealer friend (who only sells guns to his other friends) and will just sit there and print cash all day. Occasionally they will leave their base only to raid other gangs of kids that are also holed up with their gun dealer friend who is also printing tons of cash all day. All of them will shoot you on sight for loitering near their base.

Then you have the police, whose sole purpose in life is to be the biggest, most painful cock you’ve ever had the displeasure of getting fucked over by. God forbid they do anything useful and organized. I have rarely seen cops punish criminals (that is for the admins for some reason), but I always see them stunstick random people and go on printer raids which are doing much less harm to the town’s community than the gang kidnapping random people next door. Most of the time there are no cops anyway, the job is voted on, and everyone will vote against others trying to roll police because the entire rest of the server is money farming and no one wants their printers raided.

Then there are the Hitmen, who usually just kill random people out of boredom while relying on dirt-cheap hits to stay out of trouble with the admins. Hitmen don’t usually get a lot of business because if anyone actually wants someone dead (implying murder is even worth anything for either party in DarkRP lol) they will just find the faggot and blow their brains out themselves. Paying someone else to do the same would be a waste of money they could instead spend on SCars, which is an infinitely better investment because having a four-million-dollar car makes you a way better person than anyone else who owns the cheaper cars, which handle the exact same as yours.

In most servers, the Mayor can do nothing but make laws that are rarely enforced (and are usually made redundant by the server’s laundry list of rules) and warrant people. Most cops don’t even need a warrant to do shit these days anyway, so really most people who choose to be Mayor are really in it for the social status and high salary.

You’ll occasionally come across servers that have terrorist jobs, which starts you off a free assault rifle and are really just a way to mass-murder in-character. Some admins will still ban you for this anyway, because RDM. Most servers who have this job don’t have any explosives anyway so shootings are really the only way to do a terrorist attack. Any other criminal act, like kidnapping, can be done by most of the other jobs anyway so what’s the fucking point? Actually, this goes for pretty much any custom job that is just a lesser version of the default jobs. Some of these shit jobs are even donator exclusive, you’re really getting your money’s worth on that one. Why don’t you just give me a big old exclusive VIP title that says “/ RICH PUSSY LOSER /” in red letters while you’re at it? That’s worth twenty whole dollars. What else are you gonna spend twenty fat ones on, food? Get real, dude.

In my opinion, the only good jobs are the bartender (because you are encouraged to actually talk to people and listen to their virtual and sometimes real problems), and the drug dealer if the server has one of those elaborate drug cooking addons which should totally replace money printing for everyone as the barricade-your-room-and-camp-in-the-corner method for easy cash. At least you actually do something then.

Another big issue I’ve noticed is that there really aren’t any worthwhile goals to pursue besides printing money and killing people. Now considering this is DarkRP, committing felonies really should be the quickest way to success… If only it were actually fun. Right now, there is no other profession that pays more than AFKing near printers. One of the most serious problems with DarkRP is that there is little reward for doing anything creative and fun. All you can hope for is to have a fun experience with an interesting group of people, but that can be found in any game, and DarkRP will go out of its way discourage it at times. Don’t think, let the admins do it for you! Purpose is what the server rules are for! Remember, if you don’t do exactly what rule 26.4a instructs you to do in your Meth-Master Class Handbook, you could be facing up to day-long ban for FailRP!

Actually, FailRP in general is fucking retarded. So you’re telling me that a hobo can never sell junk on the streets to pay for his smack addiction, because only the Shop Keeper job can make shops? A thief can’t raid, and as a direct result cannot heist, but gangsters totally can? Is that not something thieves, specifically, should absolutely be able to do? Why even have a thief job if the only things they have different from gangsters is the lockpick, keypad cracker, and stricter rules? Most servers give gangsters lockpicks and you can buy keypad crackers, just get both of those as a gangster and you have just made the Thief completely useless.

Oh, and don’t get me started on FearRP and kidnapping or mugging. Most servers just force you to go with your captor or else you’re committing FailRP. Now, this would be fine if you had like a handcuff SWEP or a tranquilizer or something and jumped someone with it, but most of the time some asshole binds “/advert mug/raid/kidnap/prostitute” to a key and presses it ten feet away from you with no visible weapons. If you don’t immediately follow this person, or worse, shoot them, they will cry for an admin like no tomorrow until said admin makes you do what the douchebag wanted. What the fuck do you think is going to happen when you try kidnapping someone holding an assault rifle, and you don’t even have a weapon? And then people will inevitably go “well in real life you wouldn’t run away from a man with a gun”. If anything, stopping in place is the last thing a person would do. They would experience the Fight or Flight Response found in every animal. In real life you would be threatening this person’s life, and as consequence, the victim would not hesitate to fill you with holes or run away for their own safety. They wouldn’t just freeze like a deer in headlights because you’re wielding some weak-ass peashooter baby-gun. If it’s a better decision to stay and obey, then that’s fine. But don’t force that decision on me because you can’t take the fact that your victim thinks you’re a non-threatening baby man and walks out on you, and its breaking your immersion because you’re supposed to be a big strong thug with badass scars and tattoos and no one fucks with you.

Edit: Also why does it feel like every server really wants me to call for an admin every time I have a problem? What if my character is a mafia guy? If someone tries to steal my shit, I have guys to take care of it in-character, or at the very least I should be able to track him down personally and dump his body in the sewers. I’m an adult. I don’t need some twelve-year-old Daddy stand-in to fight my battles for me, just stick to banning hackers and scammers please (no offense to the cool admins, I’m not referring to you guys). DarkRP is supposed to have this ruthless, cut-throat, dog-eat-dog shithole atmosphere to it and because of that you need to suck it up, get hard and be an asshole to succeed in this world. This is ruined when everything is covered in safety nets, surrogate admin dads telling me what to do, and metric shit tons of red-tape.

Edit 2: You know what? I’m on fire tonight. Fuck having to advert raids/terrorist attacks/mugs/etc. too. The element of surprise may be the single most important advantage in a firefight you can possibly have, better than having good guns if you’re skilled enough. If you’re mad that you didn’t see someone coming, then fuck you. Set up a surveillance camera. Set up a few of them if you can. Get clever with your defenses, I always like to put a booby trapped decoy keypad near my door, and then put the real keypad somewhere hidden, like on the ceiling of the inside of a cabinet. Didn’t expect SWAT to drop in through the windows? Well then fuck you, put bars on the windows! You didn’t realize that two terrorists were committing a terror attack and not just RDMing? Fuck you dude, they’re spamming takbirs and the attack is at the PD/town square/somewhere populated and important and everything! What, did the car bomb not give it away? Also, why does the whole world need to know you’re shaking down some faggot in an alleyway, anyway?

Holy shit dude, you like just summed up my entire experience being an admin for a DarkRP server.

Only part you forgot about was the douche bags that own these servers. Like legit, I was admin for this one server that the owner literally treated it like his personal playground, using noclip and infinite RPG’s to mass murder and raid everyone on the server, including staff. He also actively demoted staff if they didn’t teleport to people regularly to advertise the donation packages that literally were a load of horse shit, and I know that for a fact because I coded the custom jobs, and the rules were set that they couldn’t be a unique job, its just a thief with extra weapons and a fancy custom playermodel that everyone has to download, plus the added armor and health, super op weapons…

But the community I’m with now is currently trying to make it’s own RP gamemode, completely from scratch. That includes the sweps too, they are made from scratch, with recoil not unlike that of CS:GO. While it isn’t easily configured as DarkRP (a bonus I guess?), it certainly seems to have the potential for a really solid RP experience. I’ll probably create a thread about it when it’s ready for beta testing.

Oh dude it is the worst when you’re getting griefed by some minge so you report him, but then you realize said minge is actually the server owner so there is nothing you can do but leave.

Implying you get a chance to leave before he bans your ass permanently and DDoS’s you for 2 hours with his $10 booter just because you typed “@<owner of the server> just RDM’d me, can I speak to an Admin?”

Like no shit, that’s exactly what that guy used to do at the RP server I was admin on.

It feels like every DarkRP server is just race to see which player can find the most technicalities in the rules so they can get what they want and get whoever is opposing them banned.

Nah nowadays I play DarkRP like it’s a drinking/smoking game. Get a bottle of vodka, and every time you see an admin being a cunt, you take a drink. Every time you see or hear a kid call "Admin to me’ in ooc or voice, pull a cone. When you get drunk/stoned enough, go gun dealer and spray down the nearest admin: Its the fastest way off the server.

Hell call one to you, saying you need to report an RDM.

Haha, when I used to get mugged on darkrp, I just dropped a 10 dollar bill and threw it away, then run like no tommorow, usually succesfull.

Nah, when a kid tries to mug you, don’t give him what he wants. He want’s money from you, so RP as if you are suicidal and demand that he shoots you, to the point where you will fight him to shoot you. When he calls an admin, tell the admin he is FailRPing because he isn’t killing you after you refused to co-operate with a mugging. Also add how you didn’t FailRP because you engaged with roleplay with the kid as a suicidal depressed person.

http://store.steampowered.com/app/388090/ This. FNAF 4 for the careful ones.

What, the game itself? Or the fact they made 4 of them?