Wastes

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remember to always turn to the camera tool when your filming to get a nice clean screen.
Also try to get a better plot, or try and the make the action more interesting. NPC fight’s are a bit too boring with out interesting camera angles and Fx ect.

Relax, my first wasn’t much better either. You “will” get better, just keep making more movies, and like Darius said, make the presentation better.

Ahh much like mine first, well more like my second.
It was good for your first, and you will be a good maker some day, but some work needs to be done so heres some tips.

Angles, you Need to use more unique angles.
Moving camera- good you used it, but don’t make it so jerky or fast or over-use it at the start, Like use 15 seconds of video as a moving camera but not all in one clip, so maybe during the battle you have 1-2 moving camera shot in there.
Hud- make a bind for this, for other situations where console commands don’t work, use the camera, Like if you want a NPC to run from point C-B start him off at point a so ACB (I know ABC) but so you can start the NPC control sequence then quickly switch to your camera stool, you go back and edit out the park where the NPC is running to a-c so you don’t get a hud/toolgun to show.

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It needs some more dramatic camera angles, also get rid of the HUD

more cl_drawhud 0

Lol I saw you in the torrent seeders thread. (btw, nothing you can ever do can possibly slow down other people. That low speed is how much you download from them)

Pretty okay.

Not too bad!

CL_drawhud 0 is definitely needed O.o

NPC fights are just a bit too droll, spice it up a little. Make it black and white, grainy, and shakey, and put text with a fancy border in between action seens.

That or make it world war two style, lower the quality, make it sepia!

Those are just suggestions mind you, but still. Not bad. Alyx was creepy at the end though.